California Raises Theft Limit To $1200 So Families Can Afford To Shoplift Thanksgiving Dinner

[Votto]

Governor Gavin Newsom announced today that stores will be told to allow $1200 of food and merchandize to be shop lifted instead of the previous lower amounts that were allowed due to inflation. "Inflation is so bad", said governor Newsom, "That families now have to steal twice as much just to keep food on the table! We also are passing out twice as many clean needles to help families cope with a Trump victory. I know I've benefitted from that program myself. It's either a heroin high, or political reality, something none of us want to have to deal with, which is why I stay here in California".

No word yet on if Kamala Harris will take his job as the heroin loving governor runs for President in 2028 or if she will stay on the beach with her bottle of wine in Hawaii. Luckily, winning elections in California has nothing to do with appealing to voters to win elections as the DNC cult continues reign supreme with record homelessness and drug abuse and crime.

 

[Cellblock2429]

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Governor Gavin Newsom announced today that stores will be told to allow $1200 of food and merchandize to be shop lifted instead of the previous lower amounts that were allowed due to inflation. "Inflation is so bad", said governor Newsom, "That families now have to steal twice as much just to keep food on the table! We also are passing out twice as many clean needles to help families cope with a Trump victory. I know I've benefitted from that program myself. It's either a heroin high, or political reality, something none of us want to have to deal with, which is why I stay here in California".

No word yet on if Kamala Harris will take his job as the heroin loving governor runs for President in 2028 or if she will stay on the beach with her bottle of wine in Hawaii. Luckily, winning elections in California has nothing to do with appealing to voters to win elections as the DNC cult continues reign supreme with record homelessness and drug abuse and crime.

/----/ Babylon Bee?

 

[Votto]

/----/ Babylon Bee?

Close but no cigar.

 

[Thunk]

$1200 for a thanksgiving dinner...The democrats have been slacking off! It should cost at least $1400 by now!

 

[Votto]

$1200 for a thanksgiving dinner...The democrats have been slacking off! It should cost at least $1400 by now!

Yep, all that carbon producing meat has to stop!

 

[E. Pluribus]

They going to allow one murder but not two or more?

 

[OhPleaseJustQuit]

/----/ Babylon Bee?

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That's what I thought.


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