Disney Quietly Cancels Live-Action 'Pocahontas' Starring Dylan Mulvaney

[Votto]

Disney Quietly Cancels Live-Action 'Pocahontas' Starring Dylan Mulvaney
Entertainment·Mar 24, 2025 · BabylonBee.com

BURBANK, CA — After watching its latest feature Snow White suffer a disastrous opening weekend at the box office, executives at Disney have decided to quietly cancel the studio's live-action version of Pocahontas starring Dylan Mulvaney.

Studio executives notified Mulvaney that the project would not be moving forward after audiences resoundingly ridiculed Snow White, blasting every aspect of the film, from its poor production quality to its pushing of a "woke" agenda.

"We thought we really had a winner with this one, but we may have slightly miscalculated," said one Disney executive who asked to remain anonymous. "After the way the public reacted to Snow White, we'd be insane to move forward with having a dude play Pocahontas. That would end up being the worst massacre American Indians have ever experienced."

The would-be Pocahontas star was shocked and disappointed by the news. "I'm absolutely heartbroken," Mulvaney said. "I was really looking forward to slipping into Pocahontas's sassy moccasins and showing those colonists a thing or two about the New World. I heard they were talking to Ryan Gossling about playing John Smith, and I'm already in love with him, so that would have been amazing. I guess I'll just have to wear my fierce braids and buckskin dress to some fabulous fashion event instead. Boo, Disney! I'm going to go drown my sorrows in a Bud Light."

Disney reportedly ordered all test footage of Mulvaney as Pocahontas to be destroyed to prevent the studio from being ruined by the public backlash.

At publishing time, Disney had also reconsidered its upcoming live-action reboot of Mickey Mouse starring Zendaya.

 

[EvilCat Breath]

Is this really satire? It sounds like something Disney has in the works.

 

[toobfreak]

Is this really satire? It sounds like something Disney has in the works.

I thought the same thing. How would you know? The other day, I heard that Disney has so damaged themselves with wrecking Snow White, their most classic work of all time, with their CEO babbling about LGBTQ this and transgender that, oblivious to the fact that they are hellbent these days on creating a product that hardly no one wants, that they have permanently damaged their corporate value.

Frankly, I would not spend 10¢ on anything Disney anymore.

 

[EvilCat Breath]

I thought the same thing. How would you know? The other day, I heard that Disney has so damaged themselves with wrecking Snow White, their most classic work of all time, with their CEO babbling about LGBTQ this and transgender that, oblivious to the fact that they are hellbent these days on creating a product that hardly no one wants, that they have permanently damaged their corporate value.

Frankly, I would not spend 10¢ on anything Disney anymore.

Neither would anyone else. If the left's agenda was so popular, wouldn't you think that they, the rabid left, would attend Disney productions? The left is hollow, it's kept afloat by paid protesters and criminals looking for a political plum advantage, like the shoplifters.

 

[toobfreak]

Neither would anyone else. If the left's agenda was so popular, wouldn't you think that they, the rabid left, would attend Disney productions? The left is hollow, it's kept afloat by paid protesters and criminals looking for a political plum advantage, like the shoplifters.

True. I'm always told by Lefturds how they are the vast majority, I'm just part of a cult, and how the whole country is moving Left.

If that were true, then why aren't Disney sales going through the roof?

 

[EvilCat Breath]

True. I'm always told by Lefturds how they are the vast majority, I'm just part of a cult, and how the whole country is moving Left.

If that were true, then why aren't Disney sales going through the roof?

If it were true, there would be no "go woke, go broke".

 

[TroglocratsRdumb]

 

[TroglocratsRdumb]

 

[jackflash]

Disney Quietly Cancels Live-Action 'Pocahontas' Starring Dylan Mulvaney
Entertainment·Mar 24, 2025 · BabylonBee.com

View attachment 1093470

BURBANK, CA — After watching its latest feature Snow White suffer a disastrous opening weekend at the box office, executives at Disney have decided to quietly cancel the studio's live-action version of Pocahontas starring Dylan Mulvaney.

Studio executives notified Mulvaney that the project would not be moving forward after audiences resoundingly ridiculed Snow White, blasting every aspect of the film, from its poor production quality to its pushing of a "woke" agenda.

"We thought we really had a winner with this one, but we may have slightly miscalculated," said one Disney executive who asked to remain anonymous. "After the way the public reacted to Snow White, we'd be insane to move forward with having a dude play Pocahontas. That would end up being the worst massacre American Indians have ever experienced."

The would-be Pocahontas star was shocked and disappointed by the news. "I'm absolutely heartbroken," Mulvaney said. "I was really looking forward to slipping into Pocahontas's sassy moccasins and showing those colonists a thing or two about the New World. I heard they were talking to Ryan Gossling about playing John Smith, and I'm already in love with him, so that would have been amazing. I guess I'll just have to wear my fierce braids and buckskin dress to some fabulous fashion event instead. Boo, Disney! I'm going to go drown my sorrows in a Bud Light."

Disney reportedly ordered all test footage of Mulvaney as Pocahontas to be destroyed to prevent the studio from being ruined by the public backlash.

At publishing time, Disney had also reconsidered its upcoming live-action reboot of Mickey Mouse starring Zendaya.

The last Disney feature film I enjoyed watching was titled "Something Wicked This Way Comes". The Disney corporation hit the skids when it went into the era of Porno & Politick'n.

 

[skye]

 

[skye]

 

[skye]

 

[Admiral Rockwell Tory]

Shouldn't Elizabeth Warren be a better casting as Pocahontas?

On another topic, has anyone else seen the picture/video of the woman with a huge tattoo down her very thick leg that said "POCOHANTAS"?

 

[Admiral Rockwell Tory]

View attachment 1093506

Ever watched the series "Bridgerton" where blacks are incorporated into British royalty? It's hysterical from a social perspective of blacks in the late 1700s England.

 

[ekrem]

Another day, another news of American decay.
Forefathhers are turning in their grave