Happy Wife Happy Life and why thats total Bullshit

[Connery]

^^^

This all sounds very curious...

I say be loving, be gracious, be yourself, comb her hair, massage her and give her a special treat once per day. She will love you forever....







....at least that is what I do for my little girl in my signature....

Relationships are easy.

Get in to one that you can afford the maintenance on and be nice.

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iQnVZ_LL4CE]Be Nice from Roadhouse - YouTube[/ame]

Right now I am exactly where I am supposed to be. I have my son and I feel like the most fortunate man on this planet. I laugh, I see life through the eyes of a child, I see his wonder and the mystery of it all. I sing songs that I had forgotten which bring me joy and a remembrance of promise of a great life from another time, another life.

 

[Barb]

FYI:

But seriously, you have a point. Couples shouldn't have to be joined at the hip or happy for / from the same things. If you're finding pleasure from ALL the same things, what is left to tell each other about?

I think when women emasculate their men, because they were brought up to believe they must "civilize" them, they then end up completely confused because the very things they civilized OUT of them were the attractions to begin with.

Men who do similar renovations to the women in their lives end up just as confused and unhappy.

 

[Mertex]

Has there ever been a time when your wife was happy and all was right with the world?

Snip

Memorize the following and you will lead a happy life.


"If Mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy"

 

[Synthaholic]

I have broken a few hearts and had my heart broken a few times....

I've had my nose broken about a dozen times. And all my fingers, and a few ribs, one wrist, all my toes, a foot, my skull 2-3 times...but never by a woman. Love is a lot more dangerous than all that.

Yeah, I'd guess you get punched a LOT.

 

[AVG-JOE]

Happiness comes from within, for men and women, I believe.

When two such people find each other and have inner happiness already, life is great.

So everyone is in agreement that the term "happy wife, happy life" is bullshit then?

Oh, HELL no!

When AVG-WIFE is happy I'm happy.

It's a system that works... WYGD?

 

[Esmeralda]

Has there ever been a time when your wife was happy and all was right with the world?

Answer: NO! What most likely happened is you did some shit you didnt want to do to make her happy ASSUMING that her happiness will lead to your happiness. It wont. The most you can hope for is that the nagging will cease long enough to get some peace but that is false peace. Thats peace that you know cannot be maintained unless you consistently do things you dont want to do which is not making you happy in the first place.

A woman can be happy and it will have nothing to do with you at all. As a guy tho, when we are happy we share in it. When we are happy we WANT our woman to be happy because as a provider it makes you feel good to do so. Ya dig.

What a woman will do is try to convince you that if you do a specific set of things...a specific secret type of way...then that will unlock her happiness. If you've seen any cop show you know what happens when you give in to the Hostage taker. He takes the thing he claimed he really wanted and will ask for more things as long as you play the sucker.

Do not fall for this. Men, put your happiness first. She may even have a problem with the thing that makes you happy. Dont waiver from it because when you do something you like you'll come home a different person. We spread the happy around! She'll even mention how "different" you are afterwards or even better she'll ask when you are doing that thing again whenever you feel angst.

Whatever makes you happy does NOT get in the way of the relationship

What relationship? You've got 'doing what you don't want to do,' 'nagging,' 'false peace,' locked up happiness that needs to be unlocked, hostage, seemingly no honest communication, and simply a very negative tone.

 

[Esmeralda]

^^^

This all sounds very curious...

I say be loving, be gracious, be yourself, comb her hair, massage her and give her a special treat once per day. She will love you forever....

....at least that is what I do for my little girl in my signature....

Well Dogs are different they are with you no matter what and dont pretend the whole time like they dont need you lol.

But be honest...Every guy has been through this. Some female tells you that if only you did (take her out, be kinder, gentler, go here, go there etc) that things would be totally different. Then once you put together the master plan and deliver suddenly thats not enough anymore. Orrr even better, you do that thing that she always wanted with hopes of getting the "reward" that was offered.

Then your face changes once you deliver and she says "you just did that so you can get blank" then decides you deserve none of it because you should do it without seeking reward.

The one I would hear most often is "Thats only for my husband". No one has ever seen a trifling chick do a 180 once a ring was put on. If she is a problem GF she will be a problem wife.

I would suggest couple's counseling. I know people for whom it has worked, yes, actually worked!

 

[Esmeralda]

FYI:

But seriously, you have a point. Couples shouldn't have to be joined at the hip or happy for / from the same things. If you're finding pleasure from ALL the same things, what is left to tell each other about?

I think when women emasculate their men, because they were brought up to believe they must "civilize" them, they then end up completely confused because the very things they civilized OUT of them were the attractions to begin with.

Men who do similar renovations to the women in their lives end up just as confused and unhappy.

The dishwashing thing, very funny!

I am very content doing things on my own and don't enjoy spending 24/7 with my partner. I never had a problem with him doing his thing without me because I didn't need, and in fact, didn't usually want, him doing my thing with me. To an extent. We should do plenty of things together, but being joined at the hip? Horrors!! That's when I'm in a relationship, am not in one now.

 

[Bluedog]

I help with all household chores. Guess who benefits from someone being happy and cared for. Me


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[Connery]

 

[Esmeralda]

That's a fishwife! Awful in my opinion. I need to respect a man, one who is his own man. Not a brute, but I have never had any desire to dominate or to be dominated. A man who would let me push him around wound be a complete turn off.

 

[ClosedCaption]

If you find the right person, these are not issues.

These are always issues. Some people get lucky others dont. But understanding behaviors is never a bad thing.

Also, in order to find the "right person" you have to know what you like, dislike, can handle or cannot. These things are learned over time. I mean, if it was super duper simple the divorce rate wouldnt be where it is.

i think you're over thinking.

Maybe you're right but thats what psychology is all about. The real question is why put up barrier of overthinking just on this topic? We debate politics, motives, meaning etc all day here...

 

[ClosedCaption]

Happiness comes from within, for men and women, I believe.

When two such people find each other and have inner happiness already, life is great.

So everyone is in agreement that the term "happy wife, happy life" is bullshit then?

Oh, HELL no!

When AVG-WIFE is happy I'm happy.

It's a system that works... WYGD?

Cool. Since you're one of the few that responded here let me ask you.

When the wife is happy what happens that in return makes you happy? Is there anything she does or does it make the environment better without actions?

 

[ClosedCaption]

Has there ever been a time when your wife was happy and all was right with the world?

Answer: NO! What most likely happened is you did some shit you didnt want to do to make her happy ASSUMING that her happiness will lead to your happiness. It wont. The most you can hope for is that the nagging will cease long enough to get some peace but that is false peace. Thats peace that you know cannot be maintained unless you consistently do things you dont want to do which is not making you happy in the first place.

A woman can be happy and it will have nothing to do with you at all. As a guy tho, when we are happy we share in it. When we are happy we WANT our woman to be happy because as a provider it makes you feel good to do so. Ya dig.

What a woman will do is try to convince you that if you do a specific set of things...a specific secret type of way...then that will unlock her happiness. If you've seen any cop show you know what happens when you give in to the Hostage taker. He takes the thing he claimed he really wanted and will ask for more things as long as you play the sucker.

Do not fall for this. Men, put your happiness first. She may even have a problem with the thing that makes you happy. Dont waiver from it because when you do something you like you'll come home a different person. We spread the happy around! She'll even mention how "different" you are afterwards or even better she'll ask when you are doing that thing again whenever you feel angst.

Whatever makes you happy does NOT get in the way of the relationship

What relationship? You've got 'doing what you don't want to do,' 'nagging,' 'false peace,' locked up happiness that needs to be unlocked, hostage, seemingly no honest communication, and simply a very negative tone.

Yes I said all of that and your point is what Es?

 

[TakeAStepBack]

it sounds like you might be doing it wrong. Or perhaps you picked the wrong woman. I understand the point. That she must maintain the happy on her own volition and that it's not your responsibility to "make her happy". I do not see that as a translation to "as a man, I'll do what I want for my happy and she can get her own". I see it as not being codependent. That type of deal never works and leads to disaster. But I do believe happy wife, happy life. The trick is to not spoil them,. You set a bar for what they may expect and then you constantly surprise and surpass that theshold in small ways. If you spoil her, or if she needsyou to do things in order to find her own happiness, you dun goofed, fella.

 

[TakeAStepBack]

Has there ever been a time when your wife was happy and all was right with the world?

Answer: NO! What most likely happened is you did some shit you didnt want to do to make her happy ASSUMING that her happiness will lead to your happiness. It wont. The most you can hope for is that the nagging will cease long enough to get some peace but that is false peace. Thats peace that you know cannot be maintained unless you consistently do things you dont want to do which is not making you happy in the first place.

A woman can be happy and it will have nothing to do with you at all. As a guy tho, when we are happy we share in it. When we are happy we WANT our woman to be happy because as a provider it makes you feel good to do so. Ya dig.

What a woman will do is try to convince you that if you do a specific set of things...a specific secret type of way...then that will unlock her happiness. If you've seen any cop show you know what happens when you give in to the Hostage taker. He takes the thing he claimed he really wanted and will ask for more things as long as you play the sucker.

Do not fall for this. Men, put your happiness first. She may even have a problem with the thing that makes you happy. Dont waiver from it because when you do something you like you'll come home a different person. We spread the happy around! She'll even mention how "different" you are afterwards or even better she'll ask when you are doing that thing again whenever you feel angst.

Whatever makes you happy does NOT get in the way of the relationship

What relationship? You've got 'doing what you don't want to do,' 'nagging,' 'false peace,' locked up happiness that needs to be unlocked, hostage, seemingly no honest communication, and simply a very negative tone.

Yes I said all of that and your point is what Es?

Well, it sounds like you're the one who is unhappy the way she points it out. That your relationship seems more liek a burden than a positive addition to your life. Thats certainly how it came across. At the same time, i imagine you're prolly at wits end currently witht he wife and therefore, it seems like you're in the hell.

I hate giving people advice when i do not know the circumstances surrounding a situation, but it does seem like you haven't been happy in years and she is causing you misery. I could be totally misreading into it.

 

[ClosedCaption]

FYI:

But seriously, you have a point. Couples shouldn't have to be joined at the hip or happy for / from the same things. If you're finding pleasure from ALL the same things, what is left to tell each other about?

I think when women emasculate their men, because they were brought up to believe they must "civilize" them, they then end up completely confused because the very things they civilized OUT of them were the attractions to begin with.

Men who do similar renovations to the women in their lives end up just as confused and unhappy.

The dishwashing thing, very funny!

I am very content doing things on my own and don't enjoy spending 24/7 with my partner. I never had a problem with him doing his thing without me because I didn't need, and in fact, didn't usually want, him doing my thing with me. To an extent. We should do plenty of things together, but being joined at the hip? Horrors!! That's when I'm in a relationship, am not in one now.

Interesting. Why not?

There seems to be 2 schools of thought here.

1. The Oprah aka the Typical. Which is "happy wife happy life" yes thats correct. How? It just happens like that. Which is ok but if someone like myself says the Husband should be happy and explain how that makes everyone happy NOW one party being happy first is suddenly unacceptable. Thats funny

2. Dont think about it just go along with number 1

 

[Pennywise]

Here's the litmus test that will never fail. When you choose your spouse, you understand that if it were ever necessary, you would willingly sacrifice your desires for that person. I don't mean trivial silliness, I mean when the chips are down you do what you need to do, realizing you made a COMMITMENT and you abide by it.

People unable to go there definitely have no business getting serious with a partner.

 

[TakeAStepBack]

When the wife is happy what happens that in return makes you happy? Is there anything she does or does it make the environment better without actions?

Seeing a loved one happy is enough. It's not necessarily a game of returns. But there are things in action that can be seen as making me happy from my personal experience. I'm not going to dive into that or anything. At the same time the environment is better without any actions. I grew up in a home where someone was always pissed off with someone else to the point the tension could be cut with a knife. I have a keen sense for that kind of tension in the air, and i do not like it. it's like walking on eggshells. Happy wife, happy life, bro.

 

[ClosedCaption]

What relationship? You've got 'doing what you don't want to do,' 'nagging,' 'false peace,' locked up happiness that needs to be unlocked, hostage, seemingly no honest communication, and simply a very negative tone.

Yes I said all of that and your point is what Es?

Well, it sounds like you're the one who is unhappy the way she points it out. That your relationship seems more liek a burden than a positive addition to your life. Thats certainly how it came across. At the same time, i imagine you're prolly at wits end currently witht he wife and therefore, it seems like you're in the hell.

I hate giving people advice when i do not know the circumstances surrounding a situation, but it does seem like you haven't been happy in years and she is causing you misery. I could be totally misreading into it.

I would've like to hear it from Es but no problem.

Sure its a burden. I am the captain of my ship and if anything goes wrong I am to blame. Thats part of being a dude. It is also a positive addition to my life as well.

No matter what you do in a relationship you will have to make a compromise. Thats a given. The Compromise wont always be a happy one. For example I never go to a dressing room and see guys holding purses with huge dumb smiles on their faces right? So theres always compromise.

What I'm saying is that if a guy is happy. He spreads around the happy and described how that happens. The response I'm getting is just a rhyme that has been told for years without explanation.

So maybe I'm wrong...but in the absense of an opposing point. How can anyone determine that? The answer to that is "feelings"