Them Before Us

[Skull]

A new book by Katy Faust that is part of a movement to restore the traditional way of parents sacrificing for their children, not the opposite.

Here is a bit from the Foreword by Robert George:

Which should we prioritize: the desires of adults or the needs of children? There is no avoiding this question—for any of us. And there is no way to be on both sides of it. You must—you will—come down on one side or the other. So, in the words of the old Union anthem: “Which side are you on, boys? Which side are you on?”
Let me make my own position clear: I stand on the side of prioritizing the needs of children. And that means I stand with Katy Faust and Them Before Us.
Children have a right to be conceived and brought up in conditions most conducive to their flourishing. You heard (or read) me correctly. I said a right. At the foundation of that right is the fact that children are human beings (persons) and, as such, bearers of profound, inherent, and equal dignity. And children are vulnerable in nearly every way and in need of care and protection over the course of many years as they grow and develop physically, intellectually, morally, and spiritually. It is wrong to do things, or to support policies or practices, that deprive children of essential conditions of their flourishing.

 

[DGS49]

Actually, a good argument could be made that the "old" way of rearing children, typified by the expression, "Children should be seen and not heard," produced BETTER children - which is the only valid measuring stick, eh?

The philosophy indicated in the excerpt above is typified by the recent demonstrations on college campuses in which THE STUDENTS demand that monuments, books, classes, professors, etc., be "cancelled" or removed because THE STUDENTS don't approve of them. This is insanity, and proof of the old adage that "a little bit of knowledge is a dangerous thing." THESE CHILDREN (on the campuses) have been raised to believe that THIER opinions count...no, it's MORE than that...they have been taught that THEIR opinions are more important, more valid, than the PROFESSORS WHO ARE TEACHING THEM!

Take your pick. I vote for the former.

 

[Skull]

Actually, a good argument could be made that the "old" way of rearing children, typified by the expression, "Children should be seen and not heard," produced BETTER children - which is the only valid measuring stick, eh?

Not the point of the book or movement. George continues in Foreword:

Children need a mom and a dad—a good, loving mom and dad who are committed and faithful to each other and to them. They need maternal and paternal influences and care. They need models of virtuous women and men, preferably in the roles of mom and dad as well as other roles, such as teacher, pastor, coach, grandmother, grandfather, godmother, godfather, aunt, uncle. Of course, bad things sometimes happen, making it impossible for a child’s biological mother or father to be in the parental social role. In these circumstances, we should do the best we can for a child. That’s what the wonderful institution of adoption, for example, is all about. But we should also do our best to ensure that as many children as possible are brought up by their married-to-each-other biological parents.

Another reviewer remarks:

"Faust and Manning will take you on a comprehensive and heart-wrenching tour of the damage done to kids when adult desires are privileged over children's rights to their own biological mother and father. But they won't leave you in the ruins. At the end of each chapter, they'll offer practical suggestions to begin rebuilding a culture that prioritizes kids' best interests. Read Them Before Us, and be ready to do the 'hard things' adults must do so that children won't have to." –Mark Regnerus, Professor of Sociology, The University of Texas at Austin

 

[task0778]

There was a time when people sacrificed for their children so they could have a better life than their parent did. Sad to say, but in too many cases those days are over. Now it's me first and never mind tomorrow, with little or no thought to the burdens we are creating for them down the road. In too many cases our children are being raised by someone other than their parent, be it teachers or whoever and sometimes that 'whoever' is not what you'd call a positive influence.

 

[Cecilie1200]

A new book by Katy Faust that is part of a movement to restore the traditional way of parents sacrificing for their children, not the opposite.

Here is a bit from the Foreword by Robert George:

Which should we prioritize: the desires of adults or the needs of children? There is no avoiding this question—for any of us. And there is no way to be on both sides of it. You must—you will—come down on one side or the other. So, in the words of the old Union anthem: “Which side are you on, boys? Which side are you on?”
Let me make my own position clear: I stand on the side of prioritizing the needs of children. And that means I stand with Katy Faust and Them Before Us.
Children have a right to be conceived and brought up in conditions most conducive to their flourishing. You heard (or read) me correctly. I said a right. At the foundation of that right is the fact that children are human beings (persons) and, as such, bearers of profound, inherent, and equal dignity. And children are vulnerable in nearly every way and in need of care and protection over the course of many years as they grow and develop physically, intellectually, morally, and spiritually. It is wrong to do things, or to support policies or practices, that deprive children of essential conditions of their flourishing.

I stand amazed that anyone even has to ask that question. From the first moment I laid eyes on each of my children, I would gladly have died for them.

 

[Skull]

Faust and friends also have a great website with much information, how to help and stories:
Them Before Us

 

[Skull]

Here is one of the stories from a guy born via a sperm bank & raised by two women:
I hated growing up with gay parents

 

[Skull]

Another example of adults' disregard for the effects their birthing hobbies have upon a person's life.
NPE Alicia - In the process of trying to help my mother and try to heal my family tree, I opened a larger wound. I suddenly did not know who I was anymore.

 

[Skull]

The stories of self-cherishing adults affecting their children, told by the now adult victims are many - in the book and online:

Stories

 

[Concerned American]

A new book by Katy Faust that is part of a movement to restore the traditional way of parents sacrificing for their children, not the opposite.

Here is a bit from the Foreword by Robert George:

Which should we prioritize: the desires of adults or the needs of children? There is no avoiding this question—for any of us. And there is no way to be on both sides of it. You must—you will—come down on one side or the other. So, in the words of the old Union anthem: “Which side are you on, boys? Which side are you on?”
Let me make my own position clear: I stand on the side of prioritizing the needs of children. And that means I stand with Katy Faust and Them Before Us.
Children have a right to be conceived and brought up in conditions most conducive to their flourishing. You heard (or read) me correctly. I said a right. At the foundation of that right is the fact that children are human beings (persons) and, as such, bearers of profound, inherent, and equal dignity. And children are vulnerable in nearly every way and in need of care and protection over the course of many years as they grow and develop physically, intellectually, morally, and spiritually. It is wrong to do things, or to support policies or practices, that deprive children of essential conditions of their flourishing.

I stand amazed that anyone even has to ask that question. From the first moment I laid eyes on each of my children, I would gladly have died for them.

Grandkids too.

 

[iamwhatiseem]

A new book by Katy Faust that is part of a movement to restore the traditional way of parents sacrificing for their children, not the opposite.

Here is a bit from the Foreword by Robert George:

Which should we prioritize: the desires of adults or the needs of children? There is no avoiding this question—for any of us. And there is no way to be on both sides of it. You must—you will—come down on one side or the other. So, in the words of the old Union anthem: “Which side are you on, boys? Which side are you on?”
Let me make my own position clear: I stand on the side of prioritizing the needs of children. And that means I stand with Katy Faust and Them Before Us.
Children have a right to be conceived and brought up in conditions most conducive to their flourishing. You heard (or read) me correctly. I said a right. At the foundation of that right is the fact that children are human beings (persons) and, as such, bearers of profound, inherent, and equal dignity. And children are vulnerable in nearly every way and in need of care and protection over the course of many years as they grow and develop physically, intellectually, morally, and spiritually. It is wrong to do things, or to support policies or practices, that deprive children of essential conditions of their flourishing.

I stand amazed that anyone even has to ask that question. From the first moment I laid eyes on each of my children, I would gladly have died for them.

That isn't the point.
We will all die for our children.
My particular method for raising my kids (now 30 and 26) was this... Birth to 5 years old, you are raising a child. After 5 years old, you are raising a future adult. From that day forward everything you do for/with your child prepares them for life.
Life will not put your child first.
Life will not be fair.
Life will, at times, beat the hell out of your child. You must prepare them for that. They need to learn independence. And spoiling/sheltering a child is doing them great harm.
Millennials are a shining beacon of this fact.
This is exactly why we have a generation of perpetually offended. Their parents did everything for them. Sheltered them, if anything bad happened to them... they saw their parents immediately take their side. Nothing is your fault. You shouldn't have to deal with this or that.
And that isn't how life is. And therefore we have an entire generation that has no clue how to deal with adversity. Only a felling that they shouldn't ever be offended. They should never feel uncomfortable. Everything that doesn't work for them, or go their way is unfair and needs to be changed to make them happy.

 

[Skull]

An excerpt showing many societal problems that would lessen IF absent fathers would get over themselves.

“All of these devastating and far-reaching societal problems have one commonality: They are rooted in the breakdown of the family—more specifically, in fatherless homes. According to statistics gathered by the Fatherless Generation Foundation, a nonprofit on a mission to reunify fathers with their children and teach “fatherless children how to cope and overcome the challenges of their fatherless journey,” the crisis of father absence is a pandemic. Fatherlessness is the infection festering in the wound of our societal ills, it’s statistically undeniable:

•90 percent of homeless and runaway youths are fatherless. Homelessness and the life of a runaway are common gateways to sex trafficking.
•70 to 85 percent of prison inmates grew up without a father.
•63 percent of teenagers who commit suicide have absent fathers.
•71 percent of pregnant teenagers come from fatherless homes.
•71 percent of high school dropouts come from fatherless homes.”

Katy Faust, Stacy Manning & Robert George. Them Before Us: Why We Need a Global Children’s Rights Movement.

 

[Skull]

Another result of being raised without a father:

The Crisis of Fatherless Shooters

 

[iamwhatiseem]

An excerpt showing many societal problems that would lessen IF absent fathers would get over themselves.

“All of these devastating and far-reaching societal problems have one commonality: They are rooted in the breakdown of the family—more specifically, in fatherless homes. According to statistics gathered by the Fatherless Generation Foundation, a nonprofit on a mission to reunify fathers with their children and teach “fatherless children how to cope and overcome the challenges of their fatherless journey,” the crisis of father absence is a pandemic. Fatherlessness is the infection festering in the wound of our societal ills, it’s statistically undeniable:

•90 percent of homeless and runaway youths are fatherless. Homelessness and the life of a runaway are common gateways to sex trafficking.
•70 to 85 percent of prison inmates grew up without a father.
•63 percent of teenagers who commit suicide have absent fathers.
•71 percent of pregnant teenagers come from fatherless homes.
•71 percent of high school dropouts come from fatherless homes.”

Katy Faust, Stacy Manning & Robert George. Them Before Us: Why We Need a Global Children’s Rights Movement.

I am proud of the fact I stayed in an unfulfilling, rather crappy marriage until my children were raised.
For me, it sucked that I missed out on 10 plus years without a good partner... but I raised my children.
I would do it all over again, and again.

 

[Skull]

I am proud of the fact I stayed in an unfulfilling, rather crappy marriage until my children were raised.
For me, it sucked that I missed out on 10 plus years without a good partner... but I raised my children.
I would do it all over again, and again.

Doing the self-sacrificing right thing is often painful.

May God, the gods & buddhas shower blessings upon you!

 

[Skull]

Another, less common reason, for being fatherless:

“Another woman exposes her profound grief upon learning at age twenty-two that she had been conceived using a sperm donor:

I never would have imagined that my father was not the biological male who contributed to my existence…. However, I have since felt a shameful sadness about this news. In a single day, I went from looking at my appearance without [a] second thought to looking at a stranger…. I feel sad, alone, confused, and lost at times, while other times I feel nothing at all. I am on a roller coaster of emotions and I am not even sure why. I don’t like that I am suddenly grieving a person that I do not know or care to ever know. More importantly, I feel as though I am grieving myself.”

From Them Before Us: Why We Need a Global Children’s Rights Movement.

 

[Skull]

Protecting girls from Trans pressure:

 

[Skull]

Eric Metaxas interviews Katy Faust about Them Before Us:

 

[Skull]

From chapter four, Marriage Matters:

“Contemporary adults are arranging their relationships in myriad ways, and depending on their state of residence, some of the mélanges are considered legal marriages; however, to children’s rights activists, “marriage” refers to the only relationship that unites the two people to whom children have a natural right—heterosexual and traditional, one man married to one woman.

Marriage has the unique ability to secure children’s right to their mother and father by codifying the only relationship with the capacity to create, sustain, and nurture a child. The marital contract is intended to eschew all other romantic interests for good reason: Marital fidelity is essential to raising well-adjusted children.

If you’re hearing the words “modern family,” it’s a safe bet the rights of children have been compromised. All modern families—whether with cohabiting, non-monogamous, same-sex, or polygamous adults—prioritize adult desire over children’s rights.”

 

[Skull]

Victory for children of Lithuania!

Children's Rights Win in Lithuania!