# Singles bar



## JohnL.Burke

Welcome to the USMB singles bar. Pull up a stool, order a drink and tell us about yourself.


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## BDBoop

@skullfuck - oops. I think I got her name wrong.


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## JohnL.Burke

Good evening madam. You're our fist customer! Would you like a drink and corn chip?


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## BDBoop

JohnL.Burke said:


> Good evening madam. You're our fist customer! Would you like a drink and corn chip?



Strawberry margarita seems appropriate, please!

I shall play the jukebox as well.

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Whgn_iE5uc]Santana Feat. Rob Thomas - Smooth - YouTube[/ame]


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## JohnL.Burke

Here's your margarita madam. It's made with real margarita mix and served in a clean glass. We're classy like that. Notice the color coordinated fly strips? I think it adds a slice of spicy with a side of conga line. I'm going for a cuban motif.

   [ame=http://youtu.be/Fu6Ra59RSis]Babalu On A Conga Drum - YouTube[/ame]


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## Diana1180

Rum Runner please and thank you.


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## JohnL.Burke

Rum runner coming up. 
 I hope everybody is all liquored up now and feeling friendly. Where are the guys hiding? Maybe I should lower the prices? 
 Anyway, before this thread dies a horrible and painful death I'm going to get things started.
 Do you like or dislike being single?
 I personally love being single. I don't say this in a sad I'm-pretending-to-be-happy sort of way. I've never actually been married but I did live with a woman for about five years. What I missed most during those years was my quiet time. Ya know, those times when you can talk back to the t.v. while wearing your boxer shorts and adorning pizza stains on your naked chest like a tribal warrior. Ok, I might be exaggerating. Never say never though. I like the idea behind marriage but I also like the idea of pure unadulterated freedom. I've never equated loneliness with being alone. I've alway felt loneliest when I was with other people so the idea of being married to avoid loneliness never seemed applicable. What are your guys thoughts on the subject?


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## BDBoop

I'm an introvert. My solitude is very important to me, probably comparable to water for the rest of humanity. I am a confirmed bachelor with a 13-year marriage in my past.


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## JohnL.Burke

Is there anything better than being yourself? I find it relaxing and exciting all at the same time. Luckily, I fascinate myself.


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## whitehall

Go ahead and lie about your marital status, your dependence on various substances and even your sexual orientation. Everything is cool until you discover the truth.


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## BDBoop

JohnL.Burke said:


> Welcome to the USMB singles bar. Pull up a stool, order a drink and tell us about yourself.



"Tarbender! Pour me another drunk!!"


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## JohnL.Burke

Wow! LOL!!!! That was just dumb.
 Anyway,  I already figured the morons would just say their moron thing. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. I still think a singles site was a good idea but maybe this is just the wrong forum for that kind of thing. It was worth a try though.


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## BDBoop

JohnL.Burke said:


> Wow! LOL!!!! That was just dumb.
> Anyway,  I already figured the morons would just say their moron thing. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. I still think a singles site was a good idea but maybe this is just the wrong forum for that kind of thing. It was worth a try though.



Hey.  Are you talking to me? I was role-playing. I am sorry you found such silliness to be inappropriate for a cyber bar.


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## JohnL.Burke

BDBoop said:


> JohnL.Burke said:
> 
> 
> 
> Welcome to the USMB singles bar. Pull up a stool, order a drink and tell us about yourself.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> "Tarbender! Pour me another drunk!!"
Click to expand...


 Oops! I wasn't referring to you with my last statement. I was referring to Whitehall for being boring. Anyway, another drunk is on your way. I hope you like margaritas with a side order of va va voom!
 You are my favorite customer BDBoop. Free corn chips!!!!!!!


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## BDBoop

Silly cute bartender.  I'm your only customer. But I invited a friend, hopefully he'll show up soon.


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## JohnL.Burke

I'm going to need extra corn chips! Thanks for the warning!


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## Gracie

Good luck at your singles bar, hon. 

I drink nestle quick chocolate milk in a huge tall glass, so if you wanna slide one over, I will suck it down and then hit the sack.


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## Gracie

John...if you are looking for a singles place to meet gals you think might suit your theme...try plentyoffish? I used to be there but left long ago. I was single then, too. But I remarried hubby so....I deleted my membership.Lots of females over there you can flirt with, in your age range. Don't leave here. Just go have fun once in awhile over there..then bring them back HERE, lol.


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## JohnL.Burke

One chocolate quickie on the rocks coming up Gracie. Glad you could make it to the semi grand opening. I'm going to hit the sack myself. It's freezing over here and I just want to curl up and snore. Have a nice night and I hope I made your Nestle cocktail to your liking.


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## BDBoop

This is the pre-grand opening. The grand opening is this weekend, WooT!!


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## Statistikhengst

JohnL.Burke said:


> Welcome to the USMB singles bar. Pull up a stool, order a drink and tell us about yourself.




Dude, most excellent idea!!!

Kumpel, grandiose Idee!!!

I'll take a whiskey, straight up, strong.


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## Statistikhengst

BDBoop said:


> I'm an introvert. My solitude is very important to me, probably comparable to water for the rest of humanity. I am a confirmed bachelor with a 13-year marriage in my past.



Uh, wouldn't that be bachelorette? 


I am a confirmed bachelor with an 8 year marriage in my past.

I enjoy the quiet and solitude of my own four walls with my 15, going on 16 year old dog, who has been a sweet and loving four-legged companion through the rough times, and known to be able to play a mean game of fetch!

And I have developed a taste for really fine Whiskey, but I almost never get drunk, ever. Truly, I drink in moderation, and mostly on card night with the gym buddies or at a birthday party or such. I never drink alone, ever.  Company policy!

John, you have a great idea with this thread.


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## BDBoop

Statistikhengst said:


> BDBoop said:
> 
> 
> 
> I'm an introvert. My solitude is very important to me, probably comparable to water for the rest of humanity. I am a confirmed bachelor with a 13-year marriage in my past.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Uh, wouldn't that be bachelorette?
> 
> 
> I am a confirmed bachelor with an 8 year marriage in my past.
> 
> I enjoy the quiet and solitude of my own four walls with my 15, going on 16 year old dog, who has been a sweet and loving four-legged companion through the rough times, and known to be able to play a mean game of fetch!
> 
> And I have developed a taste for really fine Whiskey, but I almost never get drunk, ever. Truly, I drink in moderation, and mostly on card night with the gym buddies or at a birthday party or such. I never drink alone, ever.  Company policy!
> 
> John, you have a great idea with this thread.
Click to expand...


Nope. I can be whatever I wanna be. 

I want a dog.


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## Diana1180

Not confirmed anything.  Never say never.  I was married 12 years ago.  Marriage lasted for almost 2 whole years.  Too young and for the wrong reasons.  Uh...now I forget all the questions I was supposed to answer...be right back to edit.

ok..back..only one question.

Do you like or dislike being single?  No, I dont dislike it, but at times I dont like it either.  I have a teenager that keeps me busy but would be nice to find a guy I can stand longer than 3 dates.  As I am getting older I am finding that more difficult though.  I know some of it is me, being set in my ways (i.e. stubborn)  but the other half of it is just lack of quality options.  Would rather be single than miserable...as they say.


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## Statistikhengst

BDBoop said:


> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> BDBoop said:
> 
> 
> 
> I'm an introvert. My solitude is very important to me, probably comparable to water for the rest of humanity. I am a confirmed bachelor with a 13-year marriage in my past.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Uh, wouldn't that be bachelorette?
> 
> 
> I am a confirmed bachelor with an 8 year marriage in my past.
> 
> I enjoy the quiet and solitude of my own four walls with my 15, going on 16 year old dog, who has been a sweet and loving four-legged companion through the rough times, and known to be able to play a mean game of fetch!
> 
> And I have developed a taste for really fine Whiskey, but I almost never get drunk, ever. Truly, I drink in moderation, and mostly on card night with the gym buddies or at a birthday party or such. I never drink alone, ever.  Company policy!
> 
> John, you have a great idea with this thread.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Nope. I can be whatever I wanna be.
> 
> I want a dog.
Click to expand...



Should I send you mine?


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## JohnL.Burke

Statistikhengst said:


> JohnL.Burke said:
> 
> 
> 
> Welcome to the USMB singles bar. Pull up a stool, order a drink and tell us about yourself.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Dude, most excellent idea!!!
> 
> Kumpel, grandiose Idee!!!
> 
> I'll take a whiskey, straight up, strong.
Click to expand...


 Welcome to the singles bar! One giant mug of whiskey coming up.


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## percysunshine

So, bartender, what do you know about this BDB character on the barstool to the left?


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## JohnL.Burke

Diana1180 said:


> Not confirmed anything.  Never say never.  I was married 12 years ago.  Marriage lasted for almost 2 whole years.  Too young and for the wrong reasons.  Uh...now I forget all the questions I was supposed to answer...be right back to edit.
> 
> ok..back..only one question.
> 
> Do you like or dislike being single?  No, I dont dislike it, but at times I dont like it either.  I have a teenager that keeps me busy but would be nice to find a guy I can stand longer than 3 dates.  As I am getting older I am finding that more difficult though.  I know some of it is me, being set in my ways (i.e. stubborn)  but the other half of it is just lack of quality options.  Would rather be single than miserable...as they say.



 Long story short. I went to a friends wedding. The woman and I used to work together. She would often ask why I wasn't married. Wasn't I afraid of dying alone? She was relentless with her pro marriage pontifications. She was divorced two years later after her husband had caught her cheating. I think marriages that are based on a fear of loneliness tend to be the ugliest marriages. That's not the worst part though! I spent over thirty bucks on a wedding gift! I should at least get my gift back! There should be a law or something!
 I think I would also be hard to live with should I get married somewhere in the distant future. I could just imagine my wife wanting to talk about her feelings as I feel myself quietly drowning in an internal pool of WTF. I would end up as a empty husk of dried man meat decaying in an easy chair while loosing myself in an episode of Jeopardy.


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## JohnL.Burke

percysunshine said:


> So, bartender, what do you know about this BDB character on the barstool to the left?



 She's a very nice, cool and opinionated lady. Don't talk politics with her though! She'll leave you in a pool of blood as you look at your own heart beating in her hands!


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## Katzndogz

Diana1180 said:


> Not confirmed anything.  Never say never.  I was married 12 years ago.  Marriage lasted for almost 2 whole years.  Too young and for the wrong reasons.  Uh...now I forget all the questions I was supposed to answer...be right back to edit.
> 
> ok..back..only one question.
> 
> Do you like or dislike being single?  No, I dont dislike it, but at times I dont like it either.  I have a teenager that keeps me busy but would be nice to find a guy I can stand longer than 3 dates.  As I am getting older I am finding that more difficult though.  I know some of it is me, being set in my ways (i.e. stubborn)  but the other half of it is just lack of quality options.  Would rather be single than miserable...as they say.



I was divorced in 1976.   At first it was way good fun, then I started feeling like all these guys were alike.  I knew what they were going to say before they opened their mouths with the latest small talk platitude.  There was nothing new.  I was bored.   From about 1990 to 2002 I completely rejected even the slightest possibility of having someone in my life.   Then I met my husband who was shall we say, very different.  We stayed together until his death in 2010.  Now, I am quite happily alone.  Not merely happy, but jealous of it and hostile to anyone who would intrude.  Not 3 dates worth, but one date worth.


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## BDBoop

Statistikhengst said:


> BDBoop said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> Uh, wouldn't that be bachelorette?
> 
> 
> I am a confirmed bachelor with an 8 year marriage in my past.
> 
> I enjoy the quiet and solitude of my own four walls with my 15, going on 16 year old dog, who has been a sweet and loving four-legged companion through the rough times, and known to be able to play a mean game of fetch!
> 
> And I have developed a taste for really fine Whiskey, but I almost never get drunk, ever. Truly, I drink in moderation, and mostly on card night with the gym buddies or at a birthday party or such. I never drink alone, ever.  Company policy!
> 
> John, you have a great idea with this thread.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Nope. I can be whatever I wanna be.
> 
> I want a dog.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> 
> Should I send you mine?
Click to expand...


Boy or girl? I only ask because I know whatever I got, she'd be in mourning because she doesn't know where daddy went.


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## Vox

JohnL.Burke said:


> Welcome to the USMB singles bar. Pull up a stool, order a drink and tell us about yourself.



must be _current_ single or anytime in life single?


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## JohnL.Burke

Vox said:


> JohnL.Burke said:
> 
> 
> 
> Welcome to the USMB singles bar. Pull up a stool, order a drink and tell us about yourself.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> must be _current_ single or anytime in life single?
Click to expand...


 Either way. Doesn't matter. If married people have views on single life I would love to hear them.


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## Statistikhengst

JohnL.Burke said:


> Vox said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> JohnL.Burke said:
> 
> 
> 
> Welcome to the USMB singles bar. Pull up a stool, order a drink and tell us about yourself.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> must be _current_ single or anytime in life single?
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Either way. Doesn't matter. If married people have views on single life I would love to *him* them.
Click to expand...


Him? Or hymn?

Hmmm? Hymn!!


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## Gracie

Well, I am married,but it is in name only. I love him. But not in that way. Not like I used to. His ex best friends was his lover and companion for many years and while that affair was going on, the love I had for him died. Slowly and painfully too. But...I got over it. And he got over his affair. We divorced, but never really moved out. Then we got remarried two years ago because now that we are divorced and his affair is dead, we found we were best friends and should have been best friends from the get go instead of husband and wife.

And that nasty skank he loved more than me? It has been gone about 8 years now. It's name? Well, it had two. Jim Beam and Vodka.

So..in short...I am married. But I am single as well. I will never leave him. He will never leave me. Kinda like Will and Grace never really left each other although they did live separate lives.


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## Gracie

btw, John, your chocloate milk was perfect last night. Thank you


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## BDBoop

Gracie said:


> Well, I am married,but it is in name only. I love him. But not in that way. Not like I used to. His ex best friends was his lover and companion for many years and while that affair was going on, the love I had for him died. Slowly and painfully too. But...I got over it. And he got over his affair. We divorced, but never really moved out. Then we got remarried two years ago because now that we are divorced and his affair is dead, we found we were best friends and should have been best friends from the get go instead of husband and wife.
> 
> And that nasty skank he loved more than me? It has been gone about 8 years now. It's name? Well, it had two. Jim Beam and Vodka.
> 
> So..in short...I am married. But I am single as well. I will never leave him. He will never leave me. Kinda like Will and Grace never really left each other although they did live separate lives.



Reminds me of a song I love - my daughter introduced me to the song, and then told me later that she heard 'the other woman' alluded to is addiction.  Anyway you look at it, I can never see this video without at least misting up.

And I love her voice.

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zPG1n1B0Ydw]Sugarland - Stay - YouTube[/ame]


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## JohnL.Burke

You're welcome Gracie. Chocolate milk is one of my specialties.


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## SayMyName

JohnL.Burke said:


> You're welcome Gracie. Chocolate milk is one of my specialties.



Is it possible to get a Gin and Tonic here?


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## Katzndogz

Gracie said:


> Well, I am married,but it is in name only. I love him. But not in that way. Not like I used to. His ex best friends was his lover and companion for many years and while that affair was going on, the love I had for him died. Slowly and painfully too. But...I got over it. And he got over his affair. We divorced, but never really moved out. Then we got remarried two years ago because now that we are divorced and his affair is dead, we found we were best friends and should have been best friends from the get go instead of husband and wife.
> 
> And that nasty skank he loved more than me? It has been gone about 8 years now. It's name? Well, it had two. Jim Beam and Vodka.
> 
> So..in short...I am married. But I am single as well. I will never leave him. He will never leave me. Kinda like Will and Grace never really left each other although they did live separate lives.



You don't sound happy, but resigned.   There's nothing particularly wrong with the way you have chosen to live your life, as long as you can reach beyond your resignation to something more satisfactory.


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## Book of Jeremiah

JohnL.Burke said:


> Vox said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> JohnL.Burke said:
> 
> 
> 
> Welcome to the USMB singles bar. Pull up a stool, order a drink and tell us about yourself.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> must be _current_ single or anytime in life single?
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Either way. Doesn't matter. If married people have views on single life I would love to hear them.
Click to expand...


I will tell you.  You can make me a hot chocolate with some marshmellows as it is cold here too......

I was single for most of my life and enjoyed it immensely.  I had no plans of being married, never wanted to be married although most of my unmarried girlfriends felt they were half a person until they met the other half who would complete them.  I did not and do not view marriage that way.  I find that those who do end up disappointed.   Eventually I met someone  who thought the same way I did and as I felt my life I decided to marry.  

To be honest I am content either way.  I do not find that marriage has any greater value than not being married when it comes to quality of life.  As a Christian I believe one can focus more on God if they are not married.  If you are married you have to consider everything the other person is doing and that includes going places you would rather not go, doing things you may not do otherwise do, etc.  but then again they are in the same situation. (when married both are expected to attend weddings, parties, etc. )  I think if you are content not being married then don't get married, John. For those who are married I say ....bloom where you are planted.  Your happiness does not depend on anyone else but yourself.   My 2 cents. - Jeri


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## Book of Jeremiah

Gracie said:


> Well, I am married,but it is in name only. I love him. But not in that way. Not like I used to. His ex best friends was his lover and companion for many years and while that affair was going on, the love I had for him died. Slowly and painfully too. But...I got over it. And he got over his affair. We divorced, but never really moved out. Then we got remarried two years ago because now that we are divorced and his affair is dead, we found we were best friends and should have been best friends from the get go instead of husband and wife.
> 
> And that nasty skank he loved more than me? It has been gone about 8 years now. It's name? Well, it had two. Jim Beam and Vodka.
> 
> So..in short...I am married. But I am single as well. I will never leave him. He will never leave me. Kinda like Will and Grace never really left each other although they did live separate lives.



I understand that very well but in a different way.  When I married my husband I had not met his family. ( for single people I would advise strongly that you do this before marriage so you know what you are getting into )  They did not like the idea of his being married again.  He had been single 15 years and they were very used to the status quo.  It was a very difficult family to marry into.  Alot of expectations, alot of control, manipulation, many challenges which I mainly hid myself from for over a decade.  My husband seemed unable to speak up for himself or me and so this went on for a long time. 

 To the best of my knowledge I never did anything to offend them other than the fact I existed.  At first I tried everything possible to accomodate them.  I went out of my way when they came to our home, bought their children nice gifts, wrote letters to help the children with their reading problems, I did everything I could do and this only served to make them more resentful.  To make this point clear if they call they might say Put X on the phone or is X there but otherwise there is no conversation.....  they pretend I am not in the room, have never acknowledged my son  ( and now my granddaughter who was born the day before Thanksgiving - no one called or said congratulations to us or to my son ) because in their eyes I am not worthy.  I did not have their education or their lifestyle and while I made no comment to them about their own life choices they made a point of making me the object of their discontent. 

 It was only recently my husband said to me you know, I have to apologise to you for the way my family has treated you for 15 years. It has really been awful and I am going to write them a letter about it.  ( he is still writing the letter )  To tell you the truth, Gracie, the letter does not matter any more.  It really doesn't mean anything because the pain of everything that has happened is truly gone now. In it's place I do not feel anything about it.  Like you I will always stay married and I love my husband as the person I made a vow before God to - and he is my friend and brother in Christ -my vow is for better or worse - I do not hold any unforgiveness as I can see you don't either - but neither can I say I have the same view of my marriage as I did before.  For many years any time they complained about me he would yell at me over it.    As a Christian I felt it was better not to try and vindicate myself although any time I did try to vindicate myself it only worsened the matter.   I believe this drove me into a deeper place with God because He is my source of strength.  I believe every suffering and trial has the potential to have that effect on a soul but there are certainly moments like now that I feel the need to say how I feel and I believe that is part of being human.  We are humans, there are certain things that only one who is going through it can understand and when I read your response something in  me related to that story and that while there is no bitterness or unforgiveness there are sometimes residual effects to such things because of the sheer length of time they were left unchecked.  If that helps just one person deal with their own situations immediately rather than letting them linger on, then it is worth your sharing and my sharing what can happen when they don't.  Have a nice day.  

 - Jeri


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## Montrovant

I've never been and almost surely never will be married, but I imagine I'm a far better roommate than spouse.


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## Casjah

Some people say "never say never.." NEVER. I will never get married. I see no use for it, and i am far too independent to commit to the same person for life. I have a girlfriend who i believe is also my bestfriend (and also married in an open relationship), and a few friends with benefits- and i am very happy with my life. My closest companions are my cats. Imo, there is no "right or wrong" when it comes to how a person chooses to live his/her life if they are not hurting anyone. Imo, single life is the best because there are more chances to learn, explore, and enjoy life to its fullest without obligations holding you down. Working and college are enough responsibilities for me. That being said, i know people who are married or in committed relationships who are very happy and wouldn't have it any other way. To each his or her own.


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## Vox

JohnL.Burke said:


> Vox said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> JohnL.Burke said:
> 
> 
> 
> Welcome to the USMB singles bar. Pull up a stool, order a drink and tell us about yourself.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> must be _current_ single or anytime in life single?
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Either way. Doesn't matter. If married people have views on single life I would love to hear them.
Click to expand...


anything that makes you happy is good. Unless it harms the others, but I do not see any harm in anybody enjoying single life 

Now, can I, please, have a Margarita?


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## Gracie

I am very happy katzndogs. Who wouldn't be, living with their best friend they trust with their life? We are old now...sown our wild oats, tried it as husband and wife, fought all the time....and now...we are just sitting in the proverbial rockers and being together to the end with each other because we were meant to be together. It feesl right. It is right. Just a bit different than the standard operating procedure that most other couples do.

Meanwhile...Jeri, my hubby's family has never acknowledged me. They are jehovah witness. I don't exist. Actually...neither does he to them, because he left that particular belief a long long long time ago.

We are good, he and I. Just like Will and Grace, but neither of us are gay. We are just good being in love via the heart and the body needs nothing more. At least for us.


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## Gracie

btw...we remarried because if we weren't...his lowlife family would be on the doorstep to take everything he owns and he wants me to be safe. And vice versa.


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## Gracie

Jeri....you and I have something in common now.
And pardon my french, but fuck 'em. That family. You don't need them to be happy with your own little family. 
I consider it a blessing that they chose to not acknowlege me all these years (25+). No drama. No hassles. No fuss. No muss. They leave us alone. We have nothing to do with them. I think that is wonderful myself. 

Now..I will be different and ask for a kahluah and milk...easy on the kahluah. Lots of ice.


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## Katzndogz

When I divorced my second husband I kept his family!   His mother, father, aunts, uncles and cousins.  I kept them all.  Most are dead now, including said second husband.  The cousins still hang around from time to time.   We remained very close.


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## Katzndogz

Try a Smith and Currans.  To die for.  Kahluah and milk in a tall glass topped with club soda.


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## Gracie

I have been married before. I kept my ex mother in law. She was awesome. But she is now deceased.

That Smith and Currans sounds good! Topped with club soda? Sounds interesting!

I don't drink, so most alcoholic beverages are unknown to me. I usually drink virgin daiguiries, margaritas, etc. But Kahluah is good in coffee and over milk, however the last time I tasted it for real was bouat 25 years ago, lol. Cyberly, I can drink whatever I want.


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## Katzndogz

I had divorce clients that were very much in love.  They adored each other.  They just could not live together.  He was an obsessive neat freak and she was a compulsive slob.  The fought bitterly and daily.  It was a very bad environment for their kids.  As soon as they separated they would start seeing each other and the mess would start all over again.  They couldn't live together and could not stand being apart.   Counseling didn't help.  It made things worse.  After the fourth divorce, I met with the counselor myself.  We went over the numerous divorce files and came to a suggested solution.  Don't get divorced and don't live together.  They both had decent incomes and could provide for themselves.  He had his nice neat apartment and next door was the slob!    

Not everything works for everyone.    We all must find our own way.


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## WheelieAddict

I'm single and enjoying it at the moment. I'd like to order your finest whiskey on the rocks please.


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## Katzndogz

Gracie said:


> I have been married before. I kept my ex mother in law. She was awesome. But she is now deceased.
> 
> That Smith and Currans sounds good! Topped with club soda? Sounds interesting!
> 
> I don't drink, so most alcoholic beverages are unknown to me. I usually drink virgin daiguiries, margaritas, etc. But Kahluah is good in coffee and over milk, however the last time I tasted it for real was bouat 25 years ago, lol. Cyberly, I can drink whatever I want.



Many years ago in a dissolute youth, I got alcohol poisoning.  I cannot drink hard liquor.  It has the effect of ipecac.  A glass of wine with a full dinner or a suitably diluted liquer is all I can do.  Baileys in coffee is excellent.

You haven't almost died until you almost die of alcohol poisoning!  I'd rather be stabbed.


----------



## Katzndogz

For years after we married my last husband and I didn't live together.  He lived with his ex girlfriend and their daughter.    I had a small place just for one and my cats and refused to move.


----------



## Gracie

Whatever works for all parties is best for those involved, lol. 
Hubby has his own room. He has his beloved tools and toolboxes in there, all his Native American artifact from family sent from the rez and what he bought at yard sales and ebay; his desk is horrible and there is not one clear surface on it and he loves all the furkids sleeping with him.
MY room is bohemian, neat, clean, I know where everything is on my desk and the dogs sleep with me until  nod off then go bounce in his bed. He has oodles of fluffy furry NA style blankets on his double bed and I have froo froo shabby chic bohemian Made In India beaded spreads all over mine and shitloads of pillows. We are so opposite...yet so much alike in our friendship. Especially food choices. TV shows...complete opposites, lol.


----------



## BDBoop

I am so glad this place is open 24/7. I need a hot buttered rum.


----------



## Politico

Katzndogz said:


> For years after we married my last husband and I didn't live together.  He lived with his ex girlfriend and their daughter.    I had a small place just for one and my cats and refused to move.



I need a double after reading that. Black Label please.


----------



## Gracie

I know lots of married couples that don't live together but are still couples. They just like having their own space and go back and forth from one to another. Sometimes together..sometimes not. No different than a truck driver that is gone for months at a time...or our soldiers overseas.

If it works for them...great.


----------



## freedombecki

JohnL.Burke said:


> Vox said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> JohnL.Burke said:
> 
> 
> 
> Welcome to the USMB singles bar. Pull up a stool, order a drink and tell us about yourself.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> must be _current_ single or anytime in life single?
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Either way. Doesn't matter. If married people have views on single life I would love to hear them.
Click to expand...

Thanks, John. I only have one view of single folks--and it's not exactly "never judge a man until you have walked a mile in his moccasins.
 The trouble with that thesis is, I feel straying into someone else's head is like an invasion of privacy. So I choose the simpler "what you see is what you get" approach to others' doings, and let it go at that. 

 I have a greater respect for the patrons of your bar, after reading the entire thread, though. Kudos for making it through the bad times of life and learning coping mechanisms to deal with the errors of others. 

 And Kudos to you, John, for giving singles a place to help each other out.


----------



## Statistikhengst

freedombecki said:


> JohnL.Burke said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Vox said:
> 
> 
> 
> must be _current_ single or anytime in life single?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Either way. Doesn't matter. If married people have views on single life I would love to hear them.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> Thanks, John. I only have one view of single folks--and it's not exactly "never judge a man until you have walked a mile in his moccasins.
> The trouble with that thesis is, I feel straying into someone else's head is like an invasion of privacy. So I choose the simpler "what you see is what you get" approach to others' doings, and let it go at that.
> 
> I have a greater respect for the patrons of your bar, after reading the entire thread, though. Kudos for making it through the bad times of life and learning coping mechanisms to deal with the errors of others.
> 
> And Kudos to you, John, for giving singles a place to help each other out.
Click to expand...



Yepp, this is a cool thread.


----------



## Katzndogz

Married people tend to ignore me mostly because married people tend to ignore single people preferring the company of fellow families.

It's the single people!  Especially single men my age who seem to feel I am duty bound to enter into some kind of relationship with them.   Everyone is looking to hook up, the older a person is, the more desperate they are assumed to be.  As a consequence, I am very hesitant to offer even the basics of common courtesy lest it be seen as an invitation.


----------



## Montrovant

Katzndogz said:


> Married people tend to ignore me mostly because married people tend to ignore single people preferring the company of fellow families.
> 
> It's the single people!  Especially single men my age who seem to feel I am duty bound to enter into some kind of relationship with them.   Everyone is looking to hook up, the older a person is, the more desperate they are assumed to be.  As a consequence, I am very hesitant to offer even the basics of common courtesy lest it be seen as an invitation.



There is a great way to avoid that!

Have no social life.  It works for me!  No one thinks I'm trying to hook up because there's no one to think that.


----------



## Katzndogz

Montrovant said:


> Katzndogz said:
> 
> 
> 
> Married people tend to ignore me mostly because married people tend to ignore single people preferring the company of fellow families.
> 
> It's the single people!  Especially single men my age who seem to feel I am duty bound to enter into some kind of relationship with them.   Everyone is looking to hook up, the older a person is, the more desperate they are assumed to be.  As a consequence, I am very hesitant to offer even the basics of common courtesy lest it be seen as an invitation.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> There is a great way to avoid that!
> 
> Have no social life.  It works for me!  No one thinks I'm trying to hook up because there's no one to think that.
Click to expand...


That's quite true.   It is quite possible to have a very active social life without having a social life that involves one on one interaction.


----------



## AquaAthena

JohnL.Burke said:


> Rum runner coming up.
> I hope everybody is all liquored up now and feeling friendly. Where are the guys hiding? Maybe I should lower the prices?
> Anyway, before this thread dies a horrible and painful death I'm going to get things started.
> Do you like or dislike being single?
> I personally love being single. I don't say this in a sad I'm-pretending-to-be-happy sort of way. I've never actually been married but I did live with a woman for about five years. What I missed most during those years was my quiet time. Ya know, those times when you can talk back to the t.v. while wearing your boxer shorts and adorning pizza stains on your naked chest like a tribal warrior. Ok, I might be exaggerating. Never say never though. I like the idea behind marriage but I also like the idea of pure unadulterated freedom. I've never equated loneliness with being alone. I've alway felt loneliest when I was with other people so the idea of being married to avoid loneliness never seemed applicable. What are your guys thoughts on the subject?



Good morning, and thank you, John, for opening a Singles Bar. I'd love to have a Bloody Mary, please, very spicy, as I am. 

I enjoyed reading your post, above mine, and am willing to share a bit of myself. I am a very private person, and never, ever lonely, living alone. Of course I do have a "friends with benefit" man in my life and one reason I like him, is because he lives in another town and can't subconsciously feel he can make a phone call and hop right over. Not that I would let him if he did, but this way I don't have to deny him in a way that would offend. I don't want someone to need me. When that has happened, I felt smothered. I need to feel completely free, and independent, and that keeps me happy and strong.

I've never felt alone, living alone. The loneliest times I have ever experienced, were those times I have been married. And I had no control over it. Being unmarried, I do. I design my life and it is as close to perfect, for me, as anything could get. 

Solitude is misunderstood. Most people are taught to avoid it, to be ashamed of it, to regret it. With the correct view, however, time spent alone becomes the springboard for all meaningful time spent with others. It is in solitude that the foundation for all goodness in one's life is built, or so I experience.

_What a lovely surprise to finally discover how unlonely being alone can be.---_-Ellen Burstyn


May I have another Bloody Mary, JohnL.Burke?  My limit is two, especially if I am driving.


----------



## Mad_Cabbie

If I have to put up with being marginalized, verbally abused and taken for granted, I'd rather just be alone.

It wasn't always that way, though ... I used to actually give a damn. 



[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mRdQggl2MbM]Are You Lonesome Tonight - Elvis Presley (Lyrics on Screen) - YouTube[/ame]

I'll take a bottle of VO - here's a fifty - keep it.


----------



## Katzndogz

While not marginalized my poodle is quite capable of being verbally abusive and  takes me for granted all the time.


----------



## Statistikhengst

Katzndogz said:


> While not marginalized my poodle is quite capable of being verbally abusive and  takes me for granted all the time.




Are you "woof-beaten"???


----------



## Gracie

Being a recluse helps too, katz and montrovant. I don't go anywhere. I usually don't see anyone. Only time I "go out" is to the the doc or pick up percriptions and the occassional  stop at a thrift store.
My "social" life is right here. On the net. My "museum of fine art" where there is no talking is pinterest where I can wander the hallways and look at pics, art, quotes, funnies, etc. My "talking and chatting" is here at USMB.

What more could I ask for?


----------



## Katzndogz

Statistikhengst said:


> Katzndogz said:
> 
> 
> 
> While not marginalized my poodle is quite capable of being verbally abusive and  takes me for granted all the time.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Are you "woof-beaten"???
Click to expand...


Yes.   

The other day I was working all day, mostly on the phone.  She grabbed that phone out of my hand and threw it across the room.   Then gave me the stiff back.   She sits with her back to me, nose in the air, back stiff and straight.   That's a signal that I better find out what she wants and do it, post haste.


----------



## Gracie

I would love to see a pic of that.


----------



## Katzndogz

Gracie said:


> Being a recluse helps too, katz and montrovant. I don't go anywhere. I usually don't see anyone. Only time I "go out" is to the the doc or pick up percriptions and the occassional  stop at a thrift store.
> My "social" life is right here. On the net. My "museum of fine art" where there is no talking is pinterest where I can wander the hallways and look at pics, art, quotes, funnies, etc. My "talking and chatting" is here at USMB.
> 
> What more could I ask for?



Sometimes a week or two will go by and I won't leave the house at all.  I work from home so unless I take the dog for a walk, I don't even bother going out.   I try to get to the gym once in a while.   Like yourself, I communicate with a  lot of people, all over the world, on line, and never experience being lonely.


----------



## Gracie

Speaking of....I need to take Karma for a walk next door. It is cold out there and I don't want to, but...I slept all day yesterday and was so fatigued....I didn't take her. Guess I will now while I can.


----------



## Katzndogz

Gracie said:


> Speaking of....I need to take Karma for a walk next door. It is cold out there and I don't want to, but...I slept all day yesterday and was so fatigued....I didn't take her. Guess I will now while I can.



Karma must not be a nag.  I get nagged.


----------



## Gracie

Karma is such a sweetheart. But she would have nagged me if Gracie were still here. She changed when Gracie died. Now she is just this mellow easy going dog and I am thankful for it. Just got back...she had a nice run, then was ready to come home and now she is happily chewing on a stuffed toy.


----------



## Gracie

Oh. Wait. Karma DOES nag. She sits smack in front of me and stares at me. If I don't respond, she paws me and gets closer, stares some more. 
Dinner time. She knows the time, when sometimes I get sidetracked.


----------



## Katzndogz

I'll take a pic next time she gets pissed off at me.

I should explain.   Arwen does not bark like a dog.  She vocalizes.  Some dogs vocalize a little, some a lot.  It sounds more like "Yowl, row, ruf, rowl, woo woo, wouwl"  When she was a puppy, my husband used to say "no bark" to stop her from barking.   I told him that she had to communicate some way so he started saying "no bark only woo woo".   Now all she does is vocalize, unless she sees a dog or something surprises her she won't bark.   

When I brought her here from Nevada the first time, she met my boss and launched into vocalizing that lasted for 20 minutes.   He asked what was wrong with her.   I told him that she was complaining about the drive.  It was too hot, she doesn't like my driving, the seat was uncomfortable.  Not enough potty breaks.  Water wasn't cold.  She had a lot of complaints.  If you try to ignore her when she is speaking, she will pat your hand with her paw "Aren't you paying attention?  Pay attention.  I'm speaking to you."   She can carry on an entire conversation with her vocalizing if you answer her back.


----------



## Katzndogz

Arwen changed when her cat died.   That cat was already old when Arwen was born.  He was with her, her entire life.   They played pranks on one another all the time.   When Bubba died, Arwen took it very hard, worse than when my husband died.   Her world literally came to an end.  She was destroyed by grief.   She got very very sick and I had to take her to the vet.    I thought about getting her another cat, but really, no one could replace the cat she was born with.  They were inseparable, when they weren't fighting.   I have pictures of them cuddled up together asleep,


----------



## Derideo_Te

Not having enough experience of the single life I won't comment since I was relatively fortunate enough to meet my best friend at the tender age of 22. We started living together and then her aunt managed to figure out a way to get us married 2 years later. Neither of us considered marriage to be important but since we were building a house together it simplified the paperwork. Things just drifted along without any plans for kids. We had a great social life with a good mix of both single and married friends and still do to this day.

Then after about 10 years we had a daughter and she is a joy but we felt no need for another and unlike the stories she isn't spoiled or lonely. Since we had no expectations of what marriage was supposed to be there were no disappointments. Yes, we had our fights from time to time but we had rules and name calling and lying were never allowed. This basic honesty between ourselves works. Both of our families have issues but we decided what we wanted and stuck to that and it has worked out. We give each other space and we enjoy being with each other. I spend a lot of time in my head but that is just who I am. It isn't lonely and it isn't arduous, it just is.

I could probably survive on my own but it would seem pointless without my best friend besides me. I don't think that what I have fits the traditional definition of marriage and I don't expect others to be married either. If you are single and happy then more power to you. To me the basis of a lasting relationship is friendship and trust. If you have those the actual marriage certificate and the physical living arrangement is secondary.

So that was my $0.02 worth and I didn't have a drink because I have work tomorrow.

Cheers!


----------



## dreolin

Katzndogz said:


> Married people tend to ignore me mostly because married people tend to ignore single people preferring the company of fellow families.
> 
> It's the single people!  Especially single men my age who seem to feel I am duty bound to enter into some kind of relationship with them.   Everyone is looking to hook up, the older a person is, the more desperate they are assumed to be.  As a consequence, I am very hesitant to offer even the basics of common courtesy lest it be seen as an invitation.



Not all men are like that, ya know.

I never ever tried to trick a woman into a relationship or bed or anything.

Bumbling honesty always worked well with me. that and the fact that I always though of women as people.

And i always got my own glass of water if I was thirsty.


----------



## dreolin

Katzndogz said:


> I'll take a pic next time she gets pissed off at me.
> 
> I should explain.   Arwen does not bark like a dog.  She vocalizes.  Some dogs vocalize a little, some a lot.  It sounds more like "Yowl, row, ruf, rowl, woo woo, wouwl"  When she was a puppy, my husband used to say "no bark" to stop her from barking.   I told him that she had to communicate some way so he started saying "no bark only woo woo".   Now all she does is vocalize, unless she sees a dog or something surprises her she won't bark.
> 
> When I brought her here from Nevada the first time, she met my boss and launched into vocalizing that lasted for 20 minutes.   He asked what was wrong with her.   I told him that she was complaining about the drive.  It was too hot, she doesn't like my driving, the seat was uncomfortable.  Not enough potty breaks.  Water wasn't cold.  She had a lot of complaints.  If you try to ignore her when she is speaking, she will pat your hand with her paw "Aren't you paying attention?  Pay attention.  I'm speaking to you."   She can carry on an entire conversation with her vocalizing if you answer her back.



Y'all are makin' me miss my dog. He was my best friend, a big ol' guy but the most gentle dog around kids you could imagine. When he died, I knew i could never replace him...so I didn't.

He was a mix between a mastiff and a bloodhound and I hand picked him from the pound to even shed in the right color. He never barked really. We lived on a rural route dead end so no one came by except when the fence broke and the cattle, just me and my son and my dog and sometimes a visitor. Once my son was playing on the bed with him and jumping and a kids elbow caught him in the ribs and he just gave a kittle yelp, and did the quick turn to nip but caught himself halfway and licked my son on the face. I guess love trumped instinct.

His name was Shunka Witko because we lived out in the wild, wild west but we just called him Shunk. He was a funny dog and he musta looked good too because I overheard one teenage boy say to another once as we passed them on a walk "Isn't that dog pretty" and the other one said"Yeah. He really is".

He was smart too...other than a few roll-arounds in the fish fertilizer. LOL.


----------



## AquaAthena

Derideo_Te said:


> Not having enough experience of the single life I won't comment since I was relatively fortunate enough to meet my best friend at the tender age of 22. We started living together and then her aunt managed to figure out a way to get us married 2 years later. Neither of us considered marriage to be important but since we were building a house together it simplified the paperwork. Things just drifted along without any plans for kids. We had a great social life with a good mix of both single and married friends and still do to this day.
> 
> Then after about 10 years we had a daughter and she is a joy but we felt no need for another and unlike the stories she isn't spoiled or lonely. Since we had no expectations of what marriage was supposed to be there were no disappointments. Yes, we had our fights from time to time but we had rules and name calling and lying were never allowed. This basic honesty between ourselves works. Both of our families have issues but we decided what we wanted and stuck to that and it has worked out. We give each other space and we enjoy being with each other. I spend a lot of time in my head but that is just who I am. It isn't lonely and it isn't arduous, it just is.
> 
> I could probably survive on my own but it would seem pointless without my best friend besides me. I don't think that what I have fits the traditional definition of marriage and I don't expect others to be married either. If you are single and happy then more power to you. To me the basis of a lasting relationship is friendship and trust. If you have those the actual marriage certificate and the physical living arrangement is secondary.
> 
> So that was my $0.02 worth and I didn't have a drink because I have work tomorrow.
> 
> Cheers!



After reading many of your posts, over the weeks, @ Derideo_Te, it is easy to feel your contentment with your life.  You sound like a wonderful man and I know you would make a fine partner, in any relationship in which you felt that friendship and trust, you mentioned, above. I am happy for you, and others, that have found that contentment. 

I find contentment living alone, and am joined by many spurts of happiness at home and at work. I like coming home to my cat. I don't like coming home to a hubby who wants to know _where I have been or what took me so long. _I won't explain or defend myself ( nor will I ask the same questions of him ) and the absence of those irritants are my two favorite reasons to enjoy my well-balanced life. 

I've never been _easy _for the kind of men with whom I am mutually attracted, to get along with. I won't change who I am, or be controlled. They knew when we married, of my independent nature, but they wanted to own it.   Even Dad told me one time of the mistake he had made with me all my life. He said _he had tried to break my spirit, instead of trying to channel it. _ I wondered why anyone would want to break my spirit. I loved it and I love it. It is who I am, and it doesn't suit well for the maturation needed,for people living and loving together, under the same roof. 

The beauty of it all, is that I speak with a frame of reference, and know I am in a place that is better suited for me, than any other, for I have tried them all, and the men in my life have been good men. But..._a rolling stone gathers no moss,_ and I want to feel free and unattached to those ties that bind.


----------



## Derideo_Te

AquaAthena said:


> Derideo_Te said:
> 
> 
> 
> Not having enough experience of the single life I won't comment since I was relatively fortunate enough to meet my best friend at the tender age of 22. We started living together and then her aunt managed to figure out a way to get us married 2 years later. Neither of us considered marriage to be important but since we were building a house together it simplified the paperwork. Things just drifted along without any plans for kids. We had a great social life with a good mix of both single and married friends and still do to this day.
> 
> Then after about 10 years we had a daughter and she is a joy but we felt no need for another and unlike the stories she isn't spoiled or lonely. Since we had no expectations of what marriage was supposed to be there were no disappointments. Yes, we had our fights from time to time but we had rules and name calling and lying were never allowed. This basic honesty between ourselves works. Both of our families have issues but we decided what we wanted and stuck to that and it has worked out. We give each other space and we enjoy being with each other. I spend a lot of time in my head but that is just who I am. It isn't lonely and it isn't arduous, it just is.
> 
> I could probably survive on my own but it would seem pointless without my best friend besides me. I don't think that what I have fits the traditional definition of marriage and I don't expect others to be married either. If you are single and happy then more power to you. To me the basis of a lasting relationship is friendship and trust. If you have those the actual marriage certificate and the physical living arrangement is secondary.
> 
> So that was my $0.02 worth and I didn't have a drink because I have work tomorrow.
> 
> Cheers!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> After reading many of your posts, over the weeks, @ Derideo_Te, it is easy to feel your contentment with your life.  You sound like a wonderful man and I know you would make a fine partner, in any relationship in which you felt that friendship and trust, you mentioned, above. I am happy for you, and others, that have found that contentment.
> 
> I find contentment living alone, and am joined by many spurts of happiness at home and at work. I like coming home to my cat. I don't like coming home to a hubby who wants to know _where I have been or what took me so long. _I won't explain or defend myself ( nor will I ask the same questions of him ) and the absence of those irritants are my two favorite reasons to enjoy my well-balanced life.
> 
> I've never been _easy _for the kind of men with whom I am mutually attracted, to get along with. I won't change who I am, or be controlled. They knew when we married, of my independent nature, but they wanted to own it.   Even Dad told me one time of the mistake he had made with me all my life. He said _he had tried to break my spirit, instead of trying to channel it. _ I wondered why anyone would want to break my spirit. I loved it and I love it. It is who I am, and it doesn't suit well for the maturation needed,for people living and loving together, under the same roof.
> 
> The beauty of it all, is that I speak with a frame of reference, and know I am in a place that is better suited for me, than any other, for I have tried them all, and the men in my life have been good men. But..._a rolling stone gathers no moss,_ and I want to feel free and unattached to those ties that bind.
Click to expand...


Thank you for the kind words, [MENTION=22590]AquaAthena[/MENTION]. From what you said it sounds as though those who sought to "own" and/or "break" your spirit didn't trust you. For me that was something that never even entered my head. I recall a conversation with my spouse very early in our relationship where there was a disagreement with my sister. At the time I believed them to be very close to the point of being BFF's. But instead of taking my sister's side my spouse backed me up. I think that was when I first became aware of the depth of loyalty and trust that was the basis of our relationship. We became a team and compensated for each other's weaknesses while leveraging our strengths. 

You have the strength of character to be your own person and that is admirable. Those who couldn't give you the space you needed were doing so out of their own insecurities in my opinion. Perhaps the adage about giving someone their freedom and if they return it is because of true love is the most appropriate way to view this. I also believe that we must allow each other the freedom to grow because that is where happiness lies. I don't expect my spouse to watch F1 with me and she doesn't expect me watch Dancing with the Stars but together we watch Alpha House.


----------



## High_Gravity

Well hello there, whats on tap today?


----------



## High_Gravity

Gracie said:


> John...if you are looking for a singles place to meet gals you think might suit your theme...try plentyoffish? I used to be there but left long ago. I was single then, too. But I remarried hubby so....I deleted my membership.Lots of females over there you can flirt with, in your age range. Don't leave here. Just go have fun once in awhile over there..then bring them back HERE, lol.



I've used POF for 3 one night stands, thats about it. Peoples expectations are waaaay too much on that site imo.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> Not confirmed anything.  Never say never.  I was married 12 years ago.  Marriage lasted for almost 2 whole years.  Too young and for the wrong reasons.  Uh...now I forget all the questions I was supposed to answer...be right back to edit.
> 
> ok..back..only one question.
> 
> Do you like or dislike being single?  No, I dont dislike it, but at times I dont like it either.  I have a teenager that keeps me busy but would be nice to find a guy I can stand longer than 3 dates.  As I am getting older I am finding that more difficult though.  I know some of it is me, being set in my ways (i.e. stubborn)  but the other half of it is just lack of quality options.  Would rather be single than miserable...as they say.



I have been single for a year now, I broke up with my ex last September we were together for 5 years, I was 25 when I met her. I can relate to alot of what you said, the older we get though the harder it is to actually meet someone, the dates I have been on since I have been single have been terrible. Its much easier when your young and everyones slate is clean.


----------



## High_Gravity

Gracie said:


> Well, I am married,but it is in name only. I love him. But not in that way. Not like I used to. His ex best friends was his lover and companion for many years and while that affair was going on, the love I had for him died. Slowly and painfully too. But...I got over it. And he got over his affair. We divorced, but never really moved out. Then we got remarried two years ago because now that we are divorced and his affair is dead, we found we were best friends and should have been best friends from the get go instead of husband and wife.
> 
> And that nasty skank he loved more than me? It has been gone about 8 years now. It's name? Well, it had two. Jim Beam and Vodka.
> 
> So..in short...I am married. But I am single as well. I will never leave him. He will never leave me. Kinda like Will and Grace never really left each other although they did live separate lives.



My ex wanted me to still live with her last year after we broke but as room mates, sleeping in separate rooms. That insane idea lasted 2 days. Your much stronger than me.


----------



## JohnL.Burke

I wasn't expecting the Singles Bar to be so busy so I have had to hire more waiters and waitresses (to hell with those silly child labor laws). Sorry for the delay but everybody's drinks are on the way. Along with free nachos and Singles Bar t-shirts! 
 What I have learned most from this thread is that everybody has shaped their own lives to fit what's best for them.  People have molded their lives  to conform to their needs and wants.  It takes a certain amount of strength, wisdom, (and maybe a little luck?) to maximize ones joy and security with the hand one is dealt with. 
 Does anybody have any thoughts on the Christmas season? I know Christmas can be hard for certain people.
  I used to despise Christmas. I found Christmas depressing and bleak. For some reason I would be happy being single except during Christmas. I was younger then though and perhaps pop culture played a part in my depression. I was expected to be with family but I was a long way from home. Once Christmas was over I was back to my jovial cynical reprobate self. I was me!  
 Now days though I look at Christmas as just another day. No more Christmas blues. I still hate Christmas music though. I would seriously like to kick the little drummer boy's butt.... pa rum pum pum pum all the way down the street. 
  Any other thoughts on Christmas? Anyone?


----------



## Derideo_Te

JohnL.Burke said:


> I wasn't expecting the Singles Bar to be so busy so I have had to hire more waiters and waitresses (to hell with those silly child labor laws). Sorry for the delay but everybody's drinks are on the way. Along with free nachos and Singles Bar t-shirts!
> What I have learned most from this thread is that everybody has shaped their own lives to fit what's best for them.  People have molded their lives  to conform to their needs and wants.  It takes a certain amount of strength, wisdom, (and maybe a little luck?) to maximize ones joy and security with the hand one is dealt with.
> Does anybody have any thoughts on the Christmas season? I know Christmas can be hard for certain people.
> I used to despise Christmas. I found Christmas depressing and bleak. For some reason I would be happy being single except during Christmas. I was younger then though and perhaps pop culture played a part in my depression. I was expected to be with family but I was a long way from home. Once Christmas was over I was back to my jovial cynical reprobate self. I was me!
> Now days though I look at Christmas as just another day. No more Christmas blues. I still hate Christmas music though. I would seriously like to kick the little drummer boy's butt.... pa rum pum pum pum all the way down the street.
> Any other thoughts on Christmas? Anyone?



Seems like there was always someone who was single on Christmas Eve who ended up joining in the fun but that might be because it was also our wedding anniversary. We just used to throw a party and everyone was welcome. Haven't had one for the past few years but that was largely because one or the other of us was sick and we didn't want to spread any germs around.


----------



## AquaAthena

JohnL.Burke said:


> I wasn't expecting the Singles Bar to be so busy so I have had to hire more waiters and waitresses (to hell with those silly child labor laws). Sorry for the delay but everybody's drinks are on the way. Along with free nachos and Singles Bar t-shirts!
> What I have learned most from this thread is that everybody has shaped their own lives to fit what's best for them.  People have molded their lives  to conform to their needs and wants.  It takes a certain amount of strength, wisdom, (and maybe a little luck?) to maximize ones joy and security with the hand one is dealt with.
> Does anybody have any thoughts on the Christmas season? I know Christmas can be hard for certain people.
> I used to despise Christmas. I found Christmas depressing and bleak. For some reason I would be happy being single except during Christmas. I was younger then though and perhaps pop culture played a part in my depression. I was expected to be with family but I was a long way from home. Once Christmas was over I was back to my jovial cynical reprobate self. I was me!
> Now days though I look at Christmas as just another day. No more Christmas blues. I still hate Christmas music though. I would seriously like to kick the little drummer boy's butt.... pa rum pum pum pum all the way down the street.
> Any other thoughts on Christmas? Anyone?



Hi John, how good to see you.  I enjoyed your post.

My family is far away, too, and I like that. We do phone calls, and email and that is enough for me. I have lived a life of adventure and that takes one away from that family _need_ for any holidays, in my case. It breaks the habit.

My family likes to celebrate in a way I don't. Things come out that shouldn't. _A family is as sick as their secrets,_ and my family has many and no one dares speak of them so when I am around with all my honest and forthright instincts about everything, because I have no shame and feel they haven't either, but they do, the family affair can become something all will regret and I don't take chances as I live with no regrets and am not ready to start now. I keep my heart filled with love and while it is malleable I protect it so it won't break. I keep my mind filled with gratitude and my spirit, high. I am never alone when I with myself, only. 

I love the The Little Drummer Boy and all other Christmas carols/music. I love the season and I love when it is over. I like to be with a friend or two, during the season----those people I can be open and honest with and no expectations.


----------



## dreolin

JohnL.Burke said:


> I wasn't expecting the Singles Bar to be so busy so I have had to hire more waiters and waitresses (to hell with those silly child labor laws). Sorry for the delay but everybody's drinks are on the way. Along with free nachos and Singles Bar t-shirts!
> What I have learned most from this thread is that everybody has shaped their own lives to fit what's best for them.  People have molded their lives  to conform to their needs and wants.  It takes a certain amount of strength, wisdom, (and maybe a little luck?) to maximize ones joy and security with the hand one is dealt with.
> Does anybody have any thoughts on the Christmas season? I know Christmas can be hard for certain people.
> I used to despise Christmas. I found Christmas depressing and bleak. For some reason I would be happy being single except during Christmas. I was younger then though and perhaps pop culture played a part in my depression. I was expected to be with family but I was a long way from home. Once Christmas was over I was back to my jovial cynical reprobate self. I was me!
> Now days though I look at Christmas as just another day. No more Christmas blues. I still hate Christmas music though. I would seriously like to kick the little drummer boy's butt.... pa rum pum pum pum all the way down the street.
> Any other thoughts on Christmas? Anyone?



I prefer minstral boys to drummer boys...

They seems more determined...

And I like dancing with the devils on Samhain...

And I like to see the childers smile on Christmas...

And laugh on St. Stephen's day...

Cynics can be happy and celebrate too.

There are all kinds of joy.

Merry Christmas, John.


----------



## BDBoop

I prefer to see children on Christmas. 

Am looking forward to seeing the grands at noon on Christmas Eve day.


----------



## JohnL.Burke

Happy humbug, dreolin.


----------



## JohnL.Burke

Am I the only person who thinks cash is a great Christmas gift?


----------



## Gracie

Cash is always a great gift.

I'm still in the bah humbug stage. Got a tree though. Got the standard gifts for everyone here. 

I miss my garden. I miss being outside. And I will be glad when Dec 25th is over.


----------



## AquaAthena

JohnL.Burke said:


> Am I the only person who thinks cash is a great Christmas gift?



No, I prefer to give cash as that is what those to whom I give love, want and need. This is about being unselfish. I wrap it beautifully, and send it off. The ones in my family that don't need anymore cash, I send a beautiful Christmas card and personalize it with a loving touch.


----------



## AquaAthena

JohnL.Burke said:


> Am I the only person who thinks cash is a great Christmas gift?



And it is still considered, etiquette. [ _the forms, manners, and ceremonies established by convention as acceptable or required in social relations, in a profession, or in official life._ ]


----------



## High_Gravity

I have a female friend whos mostly been single her whole life, she was married for a year when she was in the Military but thats about it, no kids or anything. I like her and shes an awesome person but she looks, acts and behaves as if she is 20 years old and shes 36, she dates men in their 20s too and gets really upset because they won't commit, just want sex, cheat on her and play games. That is what alot of people in their 20's do men or women, I dated a 20 year old for a while too last year. Is it possible if a person is single for such a long time they get stuck in time and just behave as if their 21 forever?


----------



## Derideo_Te

High_Gravity said:


> I have a female friend whos mostly been single her whole life, she was married for a year when she was in the Military but thats about it, no kids or anything. I like her and shes an awesome person but she looks, acts and behaves as if she is 20 years old and shes 36, she dates men in their 20s too and gets really upset because they won't commit, just want sex, cheat on her and play games. That is what alot of people in their 20's do men or women, I dated a 20 year old for a while too last year. Is it possible if a person is single for such a long time they get stuck in time and just behave as if their 21 forever?



Yes, unfortunately. 

Probably not irredeemable but she might need an intervention or two.


----------



## High_Gravity

Derideo_Te said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> I have a female friend whos mostly been single her whole life, she was married for a year when she was in the Military but thats about it, no kids or anything. I like her and shes an awesome person but she looks, acts and behaves as if she is 20 years old and shes 36, she dates men in their 20s too and gets really upset because they won't commit, just want sex, cheat on her and play games. That is what alot of people in their 20's do men or women, I dated a 20 year old for a while too last year. Is it possible if a person is single for such a long time they get stuck in time and just behave as if their 21 forever?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Yes, unfortunately.
> 
> Probably not irredeemable but she might need an intervention or two.
Click to expand...


I actually liked the girl but I learned my lesson, I consoled her after her ex bf broke up with her last time, he was cheating on her. We were talking for a while and we even agreed to take a trip to New Orleans together, one day I call and a guy who sounds like Shaquille O'neal picks up. She had re-united with her ex and didn't tell me, she just lives for the drama. We are still friends but I am done talking to her in that way, she was sick this past weekend and her ex broke up with her again but I am not going near that with a 10 foot pole, shes a big girl. Good luck to her.


----------



## Derideo_Te

High_Gravity said:


> Derideo_Te said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> I have a female friend whos mostly been single her whole life, she was married for a year when she was in the Military but thats about it, no kids or anything. I like her and shes an awesome person but she looks, acts and behaves as if she is 20 years old and shes 36, she dates men in their 20s too and gets really upset because they won't commit, just want sex, cheat on her and play games. That is what alot of people in their 20's do men or women, I dated a 20 year old for a while too last year. Is it possible if a person is single for such a long time they get stuck in time and just behave as if their 21 forever?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Yes, unfortunately.
> 
> Probably not irredeemable but she might need an intervention or two.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I actually liked the girl but I learned my lesson, I consoled her after her ex bf broke up with her last time, he was cheating on her. We were talking for a while and we even agreed to take a trip to New Orleans together, one day I call and a guy who sounds like Shaquille O'neal picks up. She had re-united with her ex and didn't tell me,* she just lives for the drama*. We are still friends but I am done talking to her in that way, she was sick this past weekend and her ex broke up with her again but I am not going near that with a 10 foot pole, shes a big girl. Good luck to her.
Click to expand...


Run, HG, run and don't look back! 

I take back what I said about being redeemable. No one needs a drama queen in their lives. Just an emotional black hole that leaves everyone else drained and exhausted. How do I know this? Because that was my mother and my sister. Stable and sensible might not be exciting but it beats the alternative if you want a normal sane life for yourself.


----------



## High_Gravity

Derideo_Te said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Derideo_Te said:
> 
> 
> 
> Yes, unfortunately.
> 
> Probably not irredeemable but she might need an intervention or two.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I actually liked the girl but I learned my lesson, I consoled her after her ex bf broke up with her last time, he was cheating on her. We were talking for a while and we even agreed to take a trip to New Orleans together, one day I call and a guy who sounds like Shaquille O'neal picks up. She had re-united with her ex and didn't tell me,* she just lives for the drama*. We are still friends but I am done talking to her in that way, she was sick this past weekend and her ex broke up with her again but I am not going near that with a 10 foot pole, shes a big girl. Good luck to her.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Run, HG, run and don't look back!
> 
> I take back what I said about being redeemable. No one needs a drama queen in their lives. Just an emotional black hole that leaves everyone else drained and exhausted. How do I know this? Because that was my mother and my sister. Stable and sensible might not be exciting but it beats the alternative if you want a normal sane life for yourself.
Click to expand...


The girl is beautiful, smart and has alot to offer, she has a Bachelors Degree in Criminal Justice but decided she didn't like the field and instead works in Dillards.  She just chooses to make life difficult for herself, I am convinced some people crave the drama but don't even realize it, its something inside. If she actually met a man who was good for her and treated her right, she wouldn't know what to do and just end the relationship.


----------



## JohnL.Burke

I've known men and women who were dramamaniacs. I remember one time in my younger days commiserating with a friend about my crazy-magnet. It seemed to me that the only kind of women I would attract were crazy, unstable, fatal attraction types. My friends response was to stop picking up girls at bars. It seems so simple right? However, that never even occurred to me! I felt like an idiot! How did I not equate the women I would attract with my surroundings? If you want a serious relationship then you have to meet people in a particular location. Church, work, Denny's, whatever. Maybe your friend needs to change some of her habits? Does she meet her future boyfriends at bars or nightclubs or the homeless shelter? Of course, maybe it's not bad habits but a psychologically driven addiction that leads some people to drama and misery. Either way, I'm not really sure what I'm talking about so I'm going to take a nap. It felt good to get that off my chest though.


----------



## Mad_Cabbie

High_Gravity said:


> I have a female friend whos mostly been single her whole life, she was married for a year when she was in the Military but thats about it, no kids or anything. I like her and shes an awesome person but she looks, acts and behaves as if she is 20 years old and shes 36, she dates men in their 20s too and gets really upset because they won't commit, just want sex, cheat on her and play games. That is what alot of people in their 20's do men or women, I dated a 20 year old for a while too last year. Is it possible if a person is single for such a long time they get stuck in time and just behave as if their 21 forever?



Avoid her like the plague. 

She's a complete idiot. 

People like her would not know a good man from a hole in the ground. They make you pay if you think that they care at all.


----------



## dreolin

JohnL.Burke said:


> Happy humbug, dreolin.



I have encountered those happy humbug dudes before at Artillery school...in the barracks at Fort Sill. Man, they were not only happy, they were friggin' ecstatic and crawlin' all over the place. It musta been all that replicating they were involved it.


----------



## Statistikhengst

Mad_Cabbie said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> I have a female friend whos mostly been single her whole life, she was married for a year when she was in the Military but thats about it, no kids or anything. I like her and shes an awesome person but she looks, acts and behaves as if she is 20 years old and shes 36, she dates men in their 20s too and gets really upset because they won't commit, just want sex, cheat on her and play games. That is what alot of people in their 20's do men or women, I dated a 20 year old for a while too last year. Is it possible if a person is single for such a long time they get stuck in time and just behave as if their 21 forever?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Avoid her like the plague.
> 
> She's a complete idiot.
> 
> People like her would not know a good man from a hole in the ground. They make you pay if you think that they care at all.
Click to expand...



And they are exactly the kind who feed into the mentality of "fuck their brains out, then show them the door", because a great many of them want exactly that. And then bitch like hyenas afterward because you did what they wanted.

Yes, avoid her like the plague.

Actually, now 4 years after my divorce, I am enjoying being single and alone. Time with my child to help grow her up is enough for me without the complications of a soft female companion next to me in bed.

There is something to be said about the tranquility of solitude.


----------



## BDBoop

Not to mention the peace of mind in not letting a possibly abusive person anywhere near your beloved offspring.


----------



## Mad_Cabbie

I'm very noncommittal and don't date too much, because I'm tired of hurting women with my indifference.

I'm not really that much of a prize anyway.


----------



## Statistikhengst

BDBoop said:


> Not to mention the peace of mind in not letting a possibly abusive person anywhere near your beloved offspring.




Indeed. Amen.


----------



## Statistikhengst

Mad_Cabbie said:


> I'm very noncommittal and don't date too much, because I'm tired of hurting women with my indifference.
> 
> I'm not really that much of a prize anyway.




I do think you should be kinder to yourself than that, unless of course you have three eyes (or maybe just one) in the center of your forehead...


----------



## BDBoop

Statistikhengst said:


> Mad_Cabbie said:
> 
> 
> 
> I'm very noncommittal and don't date too much, because I'm tired of hurting women with my indifference.
> 
> I'm not really that much of a prize anyway.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I do think you should be kinder to yourself than that, unless of course you have three eyes (or maybe just one) in the center of your forehead...
Click to expand...


And a Porsche can cancel that out.


----------



## Statistikhengst

BDBoop said:


> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Mad_Cabbie said:
> 
> 
> 
> I'm very noncommittal and don't date too much, because I'm tired of hurting women with my indifference.
> 
> I'm not really that much of a prize anyway.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I do think you should be kinder to yourself than that, unless of course you have three eyes (or maybe just one) in the center of your forehead...
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> And a Porsche can cancel that out.
Click to expand...



depends where you park it:

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xibtzwdXgfI]Small Package Prank by Tom Mabe - YouTube[/ame]


----------



## AyeCantSeeYou

JohnL.Burke said:


> Welcome to the USMB singles bar. Pull up a stool, order a drink and tell us about yourself.



Strawberry daiquiri, please, and thank you!


----------



## AyeCantSeeYou

BDBoop said:


> Not to mention the peace of mind in not letting a possibly abusive person anywhere near your beloved offspring.



Amen to that!


----------



## AquaAthena

Derideo_Te said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Derideo_Te said:
> 
> 
> 
> Yes, unfortunately.
> 
> Probably not irredeemable but she might need an intervention or two.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I actually liked the girl but I learned my lesson, I consoled her after her ex bf broke up with her last time, he was cheating on her. We were talking for a while and we even agreed to take a trip to New Orleans together, one day I call and a guy who sounds like Shaquille O'neal picks up. She had re-united with her ex and didn't tell me,* she just lives for the drama*. We are still friends but I am done talking to her in that way, she was sick this past weekend and her ex broke up with her again but I am not going near that with a 10 foot pole, shes a big girl. Good luck to her.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Run, HG, run and don't look back!
> 
> I take back what I said about being redeemable. No one needs a drama queen in their lives. Just an emotional black hole that leaves everyone else drained and exhausted. How do I know this? Because that was my mother and my sister. Stable and sensible might not be exciting but it beats the alternative if you want a normal sane life for yourself.
Click to expand...


I am so far from being a drama queen, I won't even argue with a significant other. That was the worst part of marriage, arguing, even though it is sometimes necessary. I just like to avoid it. I want peace and sensible discussion, with noooooo drama. There is a person in my life, I love, but won't be around because of their proclivity for argument and raising their voice. _Hey....I won't hear you as well if you are going to yell. _


----------



## High_Gravity

JohnL.Burke said:


> I've known men and women who were dramamaniacs. I remember one time in my younger days commiserating with a friend about my crazy-magnet. It seemed to me that the only kind of women I would attract were crazy, unstable, fatal attraction types. My friends response was to stop picking up girls at bars. It seems so simple right? However, that never even occurred to me! I felt like an idiot! How did I not equate the women I would attract with my surroundings? If you want a serious relationship then you have to meet people in a particular location. Church, work, Denny's, whatever. Maybe your friend needs to change some of her habits? Does she meet her future boyfriends at bars or nightclubs or the homeless shelter? Of course, maybe it's not bad habits but a psychologically driven addiction that leads some people to drama and misery. Either way, I'm not really sure what I'm talking about so I'm going to take a nap. It felt good to get that off my chest though.



I dated a girl from my local Grocery store for a few weeks, it didn't work and she said she was breaking up with me over something I said, I asked her what and she wouldn't tell me. Now I avoid that grocery store altogether, I am never going to date anyone from a place I frequent like the grocery store, work, favorite bar, favorite restautant etc etc because if you do and it doesn't work out, you may have to find a new barber, bar, restaurant etc etc unless you want your crazy ex cooking your wings for you.


----------



## AyeCantSeeYou

JohnL.Burke said:


> ......
> Do you like or dislike being single?   ......



Considering what I went through when I was married, I prefer being single.


----------



## AyeCantSeeYou

High_Gravity said:


> I dated a girl from my local Grocery store for a few weeks, it didn't work and she said she was breaking up with me over something I said, I asked her what and she wouldn't tell me. Now I avoid that grocery store altogether, I am never going to date anyone from a place I frequent like the grocery store, work, favorite bar, favorite restautant etc etc because if you do and it doesn't work out, you may have to find a new barber, bar, restaurant etc etc unless you want your crazy ex cooking your wings for you.



Don't let anyone have so much control over you that you alter your life because of him/her.


----------



## BDBoop

Exactly. I don't want to do marriage again, not least because of expectations. I didn't try to change him and would have appreciated the same consideration.


----------



## High_Gravity

AyeCantSeeYou said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> I dated a girl from my local Grocery store for a few weeks, it didn't work and she said she was breaking up with me over something I said, I asked her what and she wouldn't tell me. Now I avoid that grocery store altogether, I am never going to date anyone from a place I frequent like the grocery store, work, favorite bar, favorite restautant etc etc because if you do and it doesn't work out, you may have to find a new barber, bar, restaurant etc etc unless you want your crazy ex cooking your wings for you.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Don't let anyone have so much control over you that you alter your life because of him/her.
Click to expand...


I'ds just rather not see her again,I don't want to do the whole awkward "hey how are you doing" bullshit when in reality neither of us can care less.


----------



## AyeCantSeeYou

High_Gravity said:


> AyeCantSeeYou said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> I dated a girl from my local Grocery store for a few weeks, it didn't work and she said she was breaking up with me over something I said, I asked her what and she wouldn't tell me. Now I avoid that grocery store altogether, I am never going to date anyone from a place I frequent like the grocery store, work, favorite bar, favorite restautant etc etc because if you do and it doesn't work out, you may have to find a new barber, bar, restaurant etc etc unless you want your crazy ex cooking your wings for you.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Don't let anyone have so much control over you that you alter your life because of him/her.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I'ds just rather not see her again,I don't want to do the whole awkward "hey how are you doing" bullshit when in reality neither of us can care less.
Click to expand...


Then just ignore her if you ever see her anywhere. Act as though you don't see her, and if she says anything to you, act as though you don't hear her. You could also tell her that you have nothing to say to her.


----------



## High_Gravity

AyeCantSeeYou said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> AyeCantSeeYou said:
> 
> 
> 
> Don't let anyone have so much control over you that you alter your life because of him/her.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I'ds just rather not see her again,I don't want to do the whole awkward "hey how are you doing" bullshit when in reality neither of us can care less.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Then just ignore her if you ever see her anywhere. Act as though you don't see her, and if she says anything to her, act as though you don't hear her. You could also tell her that you have nothing to say to her.
Click to expand...


I've always tried to avoid awkward situations whenever possible, maybe thats why I am the way I am and things ended up this way. Anyways I am moving to Richmond next week so I won't be seeing her anymore anyways.


----------



## JohnL.Burke

I dated a girl I worked with. It ended badly and I went from having a job that I enjoyed to having a job diseased with awkward side glances, snide remarks and acidic rumors. I was much younger then so I blame my naivete and her tight pants. Horrible combination.


----------



## AquaAthena

JohnL.Burke said:


> I dated a girl I worked with. It ended badly and I went from having a job that I enjoyed to having a job diseased with awkward side glances, snide remarks and acidic rumors. I was much younger then so I blame my naivete and her tight pants. Horrible combination.



Yes, it is a risky idea to date a co-worker...._usually. _ 

When my favorite former hubby and I hired any of the 45 employees we needed to run the business, we avoided hiring anyone we knew who was married or dating another in our efforts to stay on top of the repercussions of those romantically involved. We had to learn the hard way, as if one employee becomes mad at the owners for any reason, and quits their job, or gets fired, then you will often lose two employees.


----------



## High_Gravity

JohnL.Burke said:


> I dated a girl I worked with. It ended badly and I went from having a job that I enjoyed to having a job diseased with awkward side glances, snide remarks and acidic rumors. I was much younger then so I blame my naivete and her tight pants. Horrible combination.



Exactly! I love my job and I like to keep things drama free, that all changes automatically when you start dating someone in the work place.


----------



## AyeCantSeeYou

Drama Queens - We had a secretary at work once that was a major drama queen! Not a day went by that something 'major' happened in her life that everyone at the office had to hear about. Thing is, it was the stupidest crap you'd ever hear. She did everything she could to bring attention to herself, even when talking to someone on the phone. She'd 'fake' laugh all the time. At the time, me and another co-worker would start baaaa'ing like a billy goat when she'd laugh, just because that is what it sounded like.


----------



## High_Gravity

Good thing about being single, its cheaper. You don't have to buy a spouse gifts for birthdays, anniversaries, Christmas, Valentines day etc etc I think I saved hundreds of dollars on gifts alone this year by being single.


----------



## Derideo_Te

High_Gravity said:


> Good thing about being single, its cheaper. You don't have to buy a spouse gifts for birthdays, anniversaries, Christmas, Valentines day etc etc I think I saved hundreds of dollars on gifts alone this year by being single.



Expectations again!  I lucked out in that area because of my absentmindedness. It is so bad that I managed to forget my own mother's birthday once. (Never heard the end of it either  but I digress.) I don't buy my spouse presents on those occasions unless it is something really special. But I will buy her random gifts. She admired a painting at a friend's house and so I tracked down the artist (80 year old lady as it turns out) and commissioned her to do one for my wife. When it was ready I picked it up and gave it to her. I see things at a garage sale or while I am out for lunch and it doesn't matter how much or how little it costs either. It is because I was thinking of her that counts.


----------



## High_Gravity

Derideo_Te said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Good thing about being single, its cheaper. You don't have to buy a spouse gifts for birthdays, anniversaries, Christmas, Valentines day etc etc I think I saved hundreds of dollars on gifts alone this year by being single.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Expectations again!  I lucked out in that area because of my absentmindedness. It is so bad that I managed to forget my own mother's birthday once. (Never heard the end of it either  but I digress.) I don't buy my spouse presents on those occasions unless it is something really special. But I will buy her random gifts. She admired a painting at a friend's house and so I tracked down the artist (80 year old lady as it turns out) and commissioned her to do one for my wife. When it was ready I picked it up and gave it to her. I see things at a garage sale or while I am out for lunch and it doesn't matter how much or how little it costs either. It is because I was thinking of her that counts.
Click to expand...


Alot of the younger women these days want the bling, they see the Kardashians on tv and want a wedding like her, they want her purse, he shoes etc. if you propose the engagement ring better be in the thousands at least, they want all this but have nothing to offer in substance, and get bored of you in less than a year and want to be single again. Than the cycle continues.


----------



## Derideo_Te

High_Gravity said:


> Derideo_Te said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Good thing about being single, its cheaper. You don't have to buy a spouse gifts for birthdays, anniversaries, Christmas, Valentines day etc etc I think I saved hundreds of dollars on gifts alone this year by being single.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Expectations again!  I lucked out in that area because of my absentmindedness. It is so bad that I managed to forget my own mother's birthday once. (Never heard the end of it either  but I digress.) I don't buy my spouse presents on those occasions unless it is something really special. But I will buy her random gifts. She admired a painting at a friend's house and so I tracked down the artist (80 year old lady as it turns out) and commissioned her to do one for my wife. When it was ready I picked it up and gave it to her. I see things at a garage sale or while I am out for lunch and it doesn't matter how much or how little it costs either. It is because I was thinking of her that counts.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Alot of the younger women these days want the bling, they see the Kardashians on tv and want a wedding like her, they want her purse, he shoes etc. if you propose the engagement ring better be in the thousands at least, they want all this but have nothing to offer in substance, and get bored of you in less than a year and want to be single again. Than the cycle continues.
Click to expand...


If those are their expectations then you need to look elsewhere in my opinion, HG. Library volunteers, book clubs, choirs, cooking clubs even volunteers at soup kitchens are people with real values. The people I have met in places like this are not obsessed with bling and yes, they are all ages from teenagers still in school to the elderly and everything in between. What they all have in common is that they are nice, ordinary people who like to give back to their community.


----------



## AyeCantSeeYou

High_Gravity said:


> Alot of the younger women these days want the bling, they see the Kardashians on tv and want a wedding like her, they want her purse, he shoes etc. if you propose the engagement ring better be in the thousands at least, they want all this but have nothing to offer in substance, and get bored of you in less than a year and want to be single again. Than the cycle continues.



Gold Diggers! They want money and arm candy, nothing else. The Karatrashians are nothing to aspire to being like, unless someone wants to be nothing more than a high-priced hooker. Lots of men are the same way - they want arm candy. Any female that can think for herself and take care of herself doesn't stand a chance with most. I'm one that refuses to stoop down to be what someone else wants me to be.


----------



## High_Gravity

AyeCantSeeYou said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Alot of the younger women these days want the bling, they see the Kardashians on tv and want a wedding like her, they want her purse, he shoes etc. if you propose the engagement ring better be in the thousands at least, they want all this but have nothing to offer in substance, and get bored of you in less than a year and want to be single again. Than the cycle continues.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Gold Diggers! They want money and arm candy, nothing else. The Karatrashians are nothing to aspire to being like, unless someone wants to be nothing more than a high-priced hooker. Lots of men are the same way - they want arm candy. Any female that can think for herself and take care of herself doesn't stand a chance with most. I'm one that refuses to stoop down to be what someone else wants me to be.
Click to expand...


I understand that naturally women want a man to protect her and care for her but the standards that alot of these women I have met these days want is insane, they want a man that looks like Vin Diesel with a fat bank roll and who drives a fancy sports car. I can't compete with any of that, its over whelming at times.


----------



## AyeCantSeeYou

High_Gravity said:


> AyeCantSeeYou said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Alot of the younger women these days want the bling, they see the Kardashians on tv and want a wedding like her, they want her purse, he shoes etc. if you propose the engagement ring better be in the thousands at least, they want all this but have nothing to offer in substance, and get bored of you in less than a year and want to be single again. Than the cycle continues.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Gold Diggers! They want money and arm candy, nothing else. The Karatrashians are nothing to aspire to being like, unless someone wants to be nothing more than a high-priced hooker. Lots of men are the same way - they want arm candy. Any female that can think for herself and take care of herself doesn't stand a chance with most. I'm one that refuses to stoop down to be what someone else wants me to be.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I understand that naturally women want a man to protect her and care for her but the standards that alot of these women I have met these days want is insane, they want a man that looks like Vin Diesel with a fat bank roll and who drives a fancy sports car. I can't compete with any of that, its over whelming at times.
Click to expand...


That's because they are all fake and have no idea what they really want. What they THINK they want is what others tell them.


----------



## Mad_Cabbie




----------



## Statistikhengst

High_Gravity said:


> AyeCantSeeYou said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Alot of the younger women these days want the bling, they see the Kardashians on tv and want a wedding like her, they want her purse, he shoes etc. if you propose the engagement ring better be in the thousands at least, they want all this but have nothing to offer in substance, and get bored of you in less than a year and want to be single again. Than the cycle continues.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Gold Diggers! They want money and arm candy, nothing else. The Karatrashians are nothing to aspire to being like, unless someone wants to be nothing more than a high-priced hooker. Lots of men are the same way - they want arm candy. Any female that can think for herself and take care of herself doesn't stand a chance with most. I'm one that refuses to stoop down to be what someone else wants me to be.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I understand that naturally women want a man to protect her and care for her but the standards that alot of these women I have met these days want is insane,* they want a man that looks like Vin Diesel with a fat bank roll and who drives a fancy sports car.* I can't compete with any of that, its over whelming at times.
Click to expand...


Even more difficult is that some of them look like this:







Kind of imbalanced, eh?


----------



## AyeCantSeeYou

No sad stories here! I'm in my HAPPY place!


----------



## High_Gravity

Statistikhengst said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> AyeCantSeeYou said:
> 
> 
> 
> Gold Diggers! They want money and arm candy, nothing else. The Karatrashians are nothing to aspire to being like, unless someone wants to be nothing more than a high-priced hooker. Lots of men are the same way - they want arm candy. Any female that can think for herself and take care of herself doesn't stand a chance with most. I'm one that refuses to stoop down to be what someone else wants me to be.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I understand that naturally women want a man to protect her and care for her but the standards that alot of these women I have met these days want is insane,* they want a man that looks like Vin Diesel with a fat bank roll and who drives a fancy sports car.* I can't compete with any of that, its over whelming at times.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Even more difficult is that some of them look like this:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Kind of imbalanced, eh?
Click to expand...


Those girls are the pickiest ones now.


----------



## Diana1180

I am back.  My father passed away on Saturday (7th) unexpectedly.  Spent the week taking care of arrangements and playing hostess to family and friends for the week.  Had to come back home on Saturday feeling guilty for leaving my mother at the house alone.  Trying to convince her to come stay with us (me, my brother and sister live an hour away in the same town)  thru the holidays so we will see.I am surviving, just trying to come to the reality that I cant call my dad for advice like I used to.  It will take time.

But other than that..I just read some horrible dating stories from you guys.  I can top them I am sure.  First relationship I had after marriage..dated him for a year...little did I know he got married about 5 months in...to someone eles.  Total double life.  And my last relationship...oh, he went back to his ex who treated him like crap...but she asked him if he would give her another chance and he said yes.  To his credit he was honest with me and wanted some time to think about it.  Told him if he needed to ask me for time then he can just go.  3 weeks later they broke up again.  She didnt change.  Throw in there random dates where guys were hoping I was some closeted bi-sexual porn star..and theres my dating history for the past 12 years.

So those dates make me hate dating. But still have not fully given up lol.


----------



## Statistikhengst

Diana1180 said:


> I am back.  My father passed away on Saturday (7th) unexpectedly.  Spent the week taking care of arrangements and playing hostess to family and friends for the week.  Had to come back home on Saturday feeling guilty for leaving my mother at the house alone.  Trying to convince her to come stay with us (me, my brother and sister live an hour away in the same town)  thru the holidays so we will see.I am surviving, just trying to come to the reality that I cant call my dad for advice like I used to.  It will take time.
> 
> But other than that..I just read some horrible dating stories from you guys.  I can top them I am sure.  First relationship I had after marriage..dated him for a year...little did I know he got married about 5 months in...to someone eles.  Total double life.  And my last relationship...oh, he went back to his ex who treated him like crap...but she asked him if he would give her another chance and he said yes.  To his credit he was honest with me and wanted some time to think about it.  Told him if he needed to ask me for time then he can just go.  3 weeks later they broke up again.  She didnt change.  Throw in there random dates where guys were hoping I was some closeted bi-sexual porn star..and theres my dating history for the past 12 years.
> 
> So those dates make me hate dating. But still have not fully given up lol.



Dear [MENTION=45679]Diana1180[/MENTION] - my condolences to you and your loved ones on the passing of your father.

Yes, dating when single again can indeed be a challenge. One day, I might just write a book.

The story about the dude who got married 5 months into your relationship with him - wow. Was he always telling you that he was on a business trip to a certain city?


----------



## Luissa

JohnL.Burke said:


> Welcome to the USMB singles bar. Pull up a stool, order a drink and tell us about yourself.




Singles bar? Why am I just seeing this? Lol 


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


----------



## Diana1180

Statistikhengst said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> I am back.  My father passed away on Saturday (7th) unexpectedly.  Spent the week taking care of arrangements and playing hostess to family and friends for the week.  Had to come back home on Saturday feeling guilty for leaving my mother at the house alone.  Trying to convince her to come stay with us (me, my brother and sister live an hour away in the same town)  thru the holidays so we will see.I am surviving, just trying to come to the reality that I cant call my dad for advice like I used to.  It will take time.
> 
> But other than that..I just read some horrible dating stories from you guys.  I can top them I am sure.  First relationship I had after marriage..dated him for a year...little did I know he got married about 5 months in...to someone eles.  Total double life.  And my last relationship...oh, he went back to his ex who treated him like crap...but she asked him if he would give her another chance and he said yes.  To his credit he was honest with me and wanted some time to think about it.  Told him if he needed to ask me for time then he can just go.  3 weeks later they broke up again.  She didnt change.  Throw in there random dates where guys were hoping I was some closeted bi-sexual porn star..and theres my dating history for the past 12 years.
> 
> So those dates make me hate dating. But still have not fully given up lol.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Dear [MENTION=45679]Diana1180[/MENTION] - my condolences to you and your loved ones on the passing of your father.
> 
> Yes, dating when single again can indeed be a challenge. One day, I might just write a book.
> 
> The story about the dude who got married 5 months into your relationship with him - wow. Was he always telling you that he was on a business trip to a certain city?
Click to expand...


Thank you for the thoughts.

He lived an hour away as it was and told me he lived with his sister and her kids. (yes, i fell for it) so he always came my way and stayed at my house (weekends my daughter was with her father)  I was leary when he never had me over but he explained it away as being busy, no privacy etc etc.  He had me stop by his work etc so I let it go.  One weekedn he said he was going to NY with friends for a bachelor party.  He even stopped at my house on his way back north.  Yep, found out that was actually the weekend he got married.  He had kept in contact with me all weekend so I was none the wiser.  4 months later I get an IM from his wife so I called her and told her everything she wanted to know and apologized to her.    Never spoke to him again.  Oh..and I also later found out he slept with some of my friends who are swingers.  He told them I was fine with it but just didnt want to know details.  Bring on the STD blood work!!

My family STILL makes fun of me to this day for that one lol.  I can laugh about it now...but was so pissed he made me the other woman.

Partly also my fault...just out of a divorce..I was naive.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> I am back.  My father passed away on Saturday (7th) unexpectedly.  Spent the week taking care of arrangements and playing hostess to family and friends for the week.  Had to come back home on Saturday feeling guilty for leaving my mother at the house alone.  Trying to convince her to come stay with us (me, my brother and sister live an hour away in the same town)  thru the holidays so we will see.I am surviving, just trying to come to the reality that I cant call my dad for advice like I used to.  It will take time.
> 
> But other than that..I just read some horrible dating stories from you guys.  I can top them I am sure.  First relationship I had after marriage..dated him for a year...little did I know he got married about 5 months in...to someone eles.  Total double life.  And my last relationship...oh, he went back to his ex who treated him like crap...but she asked him if he would give her another chance and he said yes.  To his credit he was honest with me and wanted some time to think about it.  Told him if he needed to ask me for time then he can just go.  3 weeks later they broke up again.  She didnt change.  Throw in there random dates where guys were hoping I was some closeted bi-sexual porn star..and theres my dating history for the past 12 years.
> 
> So those dates make me hate dating. But still have not fully given up lol.



My condolences Diana, I'll pick up your bar tap today.


----------



## Katzndogz

I have the worst dating stories of all.  Might be because I've been single longer.

I was dating a pilot.  He had to take a 600 mile qualifying flight with another pilot.  The other guy brought along his girlfriend.  The girls sat in the back.  We were going from Long Beach to Yuma, to Las Vegas.  Spend the night and go back to Long Beach in the morning.

On the way to Yuma, those rascally boys thought it would be fun to get wasted on weed.  Then they thought it would be fun to do some aerobatics in that Bonanza.  I thought that plane was going to break apart.  If those guys could not pull out of a dive fast enough, it was nothing but that empty desert floor.

Maybe it was the heat or the rapid changes in air pressure.  The other girl's nose exploded.  Blood was spraying everywhere.  I took off my tshirt and held it to her nose.   We made it to Yuma which is not a manned airstrip.  It's just a landing strip with some  hangars.  A man was there working on his plane.  I appealed to him for help.  I was not about to get on that plane again.   The two guys were going to argue but the man had a truly large sidearm.   They left and I was out in the middle of nowhere with no way to get home.  My rescuer said he would see what he could do and locked me in his hangar for the night.  Do you know how cold the desert is at night?  I was wearing shorts and a blood soaked tshirt.  In the morning some random guy showed up at daybreak with coffee and donuts.  He said "I'm here to take you home".  And he did.   The boyfriehd called to demand I come down to the airport and help clean the blood out of the plane.  FU!  Lick it up yourself.


----------



## Katzndogz

I truly bless Arizona and their carry laws.


----------



## AyeCantSeeYou

Diana1180 said:


> I am back.  My father passed away on Saturday (7th) unexpectedly.  Spent the week taking care of arrangements and playing hostess to family and friends for the week.  Had to come back home on Saturday feeling guilty for leaving my mother at the house alone.  Trying to convince her to come stay with us (me, my brother and sister live an hour away in the same town)  thru the holidays so we will see.I am surviving, just trying to come to the reality that I cant call my dad for advice like I used to.  It will take time.
> 
> But other than that..I just read some horrible dating stories from you guys.  I can top them I am sure.  First relationship I had after marriage..dated him for a year...little did I know he got married about 5 months in...to someone eles.  Total double life.  And my last relationship...oh, he went back to his ex who treated him like crap...but she asked him if he would give her another chance and he said yes.  To his credit he was honest with me and wanted some time to think about it.  Told him if he needed to ask me for time then he can just go.  3 weeks later they broke up again.  She didnt change.  Throw in there random dates where guys were hoping I was some closeted bi-sexual porn star..and theres my dating history for the past 12 years.
> 
> So those dates make me hate dating. But still have not fully given up lol.



Sorry to hear about your father.


----------



## JohnL.Burke

I have the worst dating story ever!

 I was taken a qualifying flight with another pilot when we decided to smoke a joint and do a little aerial acrobatics for fun when one of the girls in the back started exploding with nose blood! My date even refused to help me wash it up! Some people are just rude!


----------



## Diana1180

JohnL.Burke said:


> I have the worst dating story ever!
> 
> I was taken a qualifying flight with another pilot when we decided to smoke a joint and do a little aerial acrobatics for fun when one of the girls in the back started exploding with nose blood! My date even refused to help me wash it up! Some people are just rude!



If i knew how to do a positive rep thingie....i so would for this.


----------



## Katzndogz

JohnL.Burke said:


> I have the worst dating story ever!
> 
> I was taken a qualifying flight with another pilot when we decided to smoke a joint and do a little aerial acrobatics for fun when one of the girls in the back started exploding with nose blood! My date even refused to help me wash it up! Some people are just rude!



I would say Phillip, is that you if I didn't know he died about six years ago.


----------



## BDBoop

Diana1180 said:


> I am back.  My father passed away on Saturday (7th) unexpectedly.  Spent the week taking care of arrangements and playing hostess to family and friends for the week.  Had to come back home on Saturday feeling guilty for leaving my mother at the house alone.  Trying to convince her to come stay with us (me, my brother and sister live an hour away in the same town)  thru the holidays so we will see.I am surviving, just trying to come to the reality that I cant call my dad for advice like I used to.  It will take time.
> 
> But other than that..I just read some horrible dating stories from you guys.  I can top them I am sure.  First relationship I had after marriage..dated him for a year...little did I know he got married about 5 months in...to someone eles.  Total double life.  And my last relationship...oh, he went back to his ex who treated him like crap...but she asked him if he would give her another chance and he said yes.  To his credit he was honest with me and wanted some time to think about it.  Told him if he needed to ask me for time then he can just go.  3 weeks later they broke up again.  She didnt change.  Throw in there random dates where guys were hoping I was some closeted bi-sexual porn star..and theres my dating history for the past 12 years.
> 
> So those dates make me hate dating. But still have not fully given up lol.



My heart is with you, Diana. I am so sorry for your loss.


----------



## BDBoop

Diana1180 said:


> JohnL.Burke said:
> 
> 
> 
> I have the worst dating story ever!
> 
> I was taken a qualifying flight with another pilot when we decided to smoke a joint and do a little aerial acrobatics for fun when one of the girls in the back started exploding with nose blood! My date even refused to help me wash it up! Some people are just rude!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> If i knew how to do a positive rep thingie....i so would for this.
Click to expand...


Top right corner of the post in question, you'll see a "thumbs up/thumbs down" sign. Click on that.  It's automatically set to give positive rep, you have to move the button to give negative rep.


----------



## Gracie

LOL John!

Diana, sorry about your dad


----------



## High_Gravity

Katzndogz said:


> I have the worst dating stories of all.  Might be because I've been single longer.
> 
> I was dating a pilot.  He had to take a 600 mile qualifying flight with another pilot.  The other guy brought along his girlfriend.  The girls sat in the back.  We were going from Long Beach to Yuma, to Las Vegas.  Spend the night and go back to Long Beach in the morning.
> 
> On the way to Yuma, those rascally boys thought it would be fun to get wasted on weed.  Then they thought it would be fun to do some aerobatics in that Bonanza.  I thought that plane was going to break apart.  If those guys could not pull out of a dive fast enough, it was nothing but that empty desert floor.
> 
> Maybe it was the heat or the rapid changes in air pressure.  The other girl's nose exploded.  Blood was spraying everywhere.  I took off my tshirt and held it to her nose.   We made it to Yuma which is not a manned airstrip.  It's just a landing strip with some  hangars.  A man was there working on his plane.  I appealed to him for help.  I was not about to get on that plane again.   The two guys were going to argue but the man had a truly large sidearm.   They left and I was out in the middle of nowhere with no way to get home.  My rescuer said he would see what he could do and locked me in his hangar for the night.  Do you know how cold the desert is at night?  I was wearing shorts and a blood soaked tshirt.  In the morning some random guy showed up at daybreak with coffee and donuts.  He said "I'm here to take you home".  And he did.   The boyfriehd called to demand I come down to the airport and help clean the blood out of the plane.  FU!  Lick it up yourself.



Katz you always have the craziest stories you should write a book.


----------



## High_Gravity

Has anyone here tried a long distance relationship? I can't imagine how that would work these days.


----------



## Katzndogz

High_Gravity said:


> Katzndogz said:
> 
> 
> 
> I have the worst dating stories of all.  Might be because I've been single longer.
> 
> I was dating a pilot.  He had to take a 600 mile qualifying flight with another pilot.  The other guy brought along his girlfriend.  The girls sat in the back.  We were going from Long Beach to Yuma, to Las Vegas.  Spend the night and go back to Long Beach in the morning.
> 
> On the way to Yuma, those rascally boys thought it would be fun to get wasted on weed.  Then they thought it would be fun to do some aerobatics in that Bonanza.  I thought that plane was going to break apart.  If those guys could not pull out of a dive fast enough, it was nothing but that empty desert floor.
> 
> Maybe it was the heat or the rapid changes in air pressure.  The other girl's nose exploded.  Blood was spraying everywhere.  I took off my tshirt and held it to her nose.   We made it to Yuma which is not a manned airstrip.  It's just a landing strip with some  hangars.  A man was there working on his plane.  I appealed to him for help.  I was not about to get on that plane again.   The two guys were going to argue but the man had a truly large sidearm.   They left and I was out in the middle of nowhere with no way to get home.  My rescuer said he would see what he could do and locked me in his hangar for the night.  Do you know how cold the desert is at night?  I was wearing shorts and a blood soaked tshirt.  In the morning some random guy showed up at daybreak with coffee and donuts.  He said "I'm here to take you home".  And he did.   The boyfriehd called to demand I come down to the airport and help clean the blood out of the plane.  FU!  Lick it up yourself.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Katz you always have the craziest stories you should write a book.
Click to expand...


Everyone says that.

I have just led a very long life.  It really doesn't seem that long in the great scheme of things but it has to be because I've outlived everyone else I knew.   I've never lived any kind of normal life.  This incident happened in maybe 1977 - 1978 I have a past to draw on.


----------



## Diana1180

High_Gravity said:


> Has anyone here tried a long distance relationship? I can't imagine how that would work these days.



I have before.  It just takes honesty and communication.  It can work if both parties want it to.  Its tougher..but do-able.  Plus depends on how far.  That takes money.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Has anyone here tried a long distance relationship? I can't imagine how that would work these days.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I have before.  It just takes honesty and communication.  It can work if both parties want it to.  Its tougher..but do-able.  Plus depends on how far.  That takes money.
Click to expand...


Yeah I'm deciding against it, I have a girl I like in San Diego but thats so far and she gets hit on everyday, I can't put stock in a girl I can't even see, plus travel is not economically feasible for either of us at this point. I've known her for 7 years we met in the Military.


----------



## Katzndogz

It has a better chance of working for couples that are devoted and committed.  For building a relationship it doesn't work at all.


----------



## High_Gravity

Katzndogz said:


> It has a better chance of working for couples that are devoted and committed.  For building a relationship it doesn't work at all.



Yeah I already know, I'm not going to try it I'll just be setting myself up for failure.


----------



## JohnL.Burke

High_Gravity said:


> Katzndogz said:
> 
> 
> 
> It has a better chance of working for couples that are devoted and committed.  For building a relationship it doesn't work at all.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Yeah I already know, I'm not going to try it I'll just be setting myself up for failure.
Click to expand...


 I agree with you. Healthy relationships are hard enough without throwing in more obstacles like distance. I've tried long distant relationships before and they never worked out. I'm not saying long distant relationships are impossible, just very very difficult. Nothing is better for a relationship than close proximity and face to face conversation.


----------



## Casjah

i don't know, absence makes the heart grow fonder is true for me. My girlfriend is my best and closest friend, but if she was in my face every single day, we'd probably kill each other. lol


----------



## Katzndogz

Casjah said:


> i don't know, absence makes the heart grow fonder is true for me. My girlfriend is my best and closest friend, but if she was in my face every single day, we'd probably kill each other. lol



Sometimes it's out of sight out of mind.


----------



## JohnL.Burke

Casjah said:


> i don't know, absence makes the heart grow fonder is true for me. My girlfriend is my best and closest friend, but if she was in my face every single day, we'd probably kill each other. lol



 LOL! I agree that having somebody in your face everyday would lead to homicide but the best thing about living near your girlfriend is that you have options. You can be with your girlfriend or not be with her. You can be with your girlfriend part of the day and alone part of the day. In a long distance relationship though too many options have been taken away from you.


----------



## High_Gravity

Katzndogz said:


> Casjah said:
> 
> 
> 
> i don't know, absence makes the heart grow fonder is true for me. My girlfriend is my best and closest friend, but if she was in my face every single day, we'd probably kill each other. lol
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Sometimes it's out of sight out of mind.
Click to expand...


Women get hit on all the time and asked out regardless of their status whether its long distance or not, its just harder when your not there. Me and this girl go back a long ways, we were both stationed together in California but were both married to other people at the time, the guy who said timing is everything is so fucking right in this instance.


----------



## High_Gravity

JohnL.Burke said:


> Casjah said:
> 
> 
> 
> i don't know, absence makes the heart grow fonder is true for me. My girlfriend is my best and closest friend, but if she was in my face every single day, we'd probably kill each other. lol
> 
> 
> 
> 
> LOL! I agree that having somebody in your face everyday would lead to homicide but the best thing about living near your girlfriend is that you have options. You can be with your girlfriend or not be with her. You can be with your girlfriend part of the day and alone part of the day. In a long distance relationship though too many options have been taken away from you.
Click to expand...


Yes and if neither of you have the money or time to take trips to be with each other occasionally it will burn to the ground quicker than a wooden bbq grill. A long distance relationship maybe could have worked like 60 years ago when people were more conservative and wrote letters but in this generation now of the Jersey Shore and Miley Cyrus, its doomed to failure. People want their pleasure now, not later down the line. Very few people wait for something good anymore.


----------



## Statistikhengst

High_Gravity said:


> JohnL.Burke said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Casjah said:
> 
> 
> 
> i don't know, absence makes the heart grow fonder is true for me. My girlfriend is my best and closest friend, but if she was in my face every single day, we'd probably kill each other. lol
> 
> 
> 
> 
> LOL! I agree that having somebody in your face everyday would lead to homicide but the best thing about living near your girlfriend is that you have options. You can be with your girlfriend or not be with her. You can be with your girlfriend part of the day and alone part of the day. In a long distance relationship though too many options have been taken away from you.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Yes and if neither of you have the money or time to take trips to be with each other occasionally it will burn to the ground quicker than a wooden bbq grill. A long distance relationship maybe could have worked like 60 years ago when people were more conservative and wrote letters but in this generation now of the Jersey Shore and Miley Cyrus, its doomed to failure. People want their pleasure now, not later down the line. Very few people wait for something good anymore.
Click to expand...



I agree with you. Too many instant-tea temptations for partners in a long-distance relationship these day.

I have a buddy whose girlfriend was literally texting with another guy with whom she was having an affair, during dinner with my buddy at a ritzy restaurant in Columbus, OH. A waiter with a very hot plate walked by, slipped, part of the plate touched her arm, she screamed, the Iphone flew threw the air, landed in my buddy's hands and he read stuff like "please fill me up with your hot juice. XXX works graveyard tomorrow.".

My buddy walked away from the table and never looked back. Her stuff was on the curb within 4 hours, the locks were changed and he drank himself into a stupor. It was pretty ugly.

Texting about fucking with your affair while eating a nice dinner with your boyfriend. Pretty fucking crass.

I am starting to wonder how many divorces have been sparked by social media hanky panky....


----------



## High_Gravity

Statistikhengst said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> JohnL.Burke said:
> 
> 
> 
> LOL! I agree that having somebody in your face everyday would lead to homicide but the best thing about living near your girlfriend is that you have options. You can be with your girlfriend or not be with her. You can be with your girlfriend part of the day and alone part of the day. In a long distance relationship though too many options have been taken away from you.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Yes and if neither of you have the money or time to take trips to be with each other occasionally it will burn to the ground quicker than a wooden bbq grill. A long distance relationship maybe could have worked like 60 years ago when people were more conservative and wrote letters but in this generation now of the Jersey Shore and Miley Cyrus, its doomed to failure. People want their pleasure now, not later down the line. Very few people wait for something good anymore.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> 
> I agree with you. Too many instant-tea temptations for partners in a long-distance relationship these day.
> 
> I have a buddy whose girlfriend was literally texting with another guy with whom she was having an affair, during dinner with my buddy at a ritzy restaurant in Columbus, OH. A waiter with a very hot plate walked by, slipped, part of the plate touched her arm, she screamed, the Iphone flew threw the air, landed in my buddy's hands and he read stuff like "please fill me up with your hot juice. XXX works graveyard tomorrow.".
> 
> My buddy walked away from the table and never looked back. Her stuff was on the curb within 4 hours, the locks were changed and he drank himself into a stupor. It was pretty ugly.
> 
> Texting about fucking with your affair while eating a nice dinner with your boyfriend. Pretty fucking crass.
> 
> I am starting to wonder how many divorces have been sparked by social media hanky panky....
Click to expand...


Nobody has any shame anymore, I know a guy who was deployed to Afghanistan for 8 months and his wife started an affair while he was gone. When he got back his unit had a welcome back party and his wife invited the new guy to the party and was texting him while he was there, her husband found the phone and saw the texts and proceeded to beat 7 shades of shit out of his wifes boyfriend. It was pretty ugly, I've seen it all people just want their pleasure and their orgasm they don't care.


----------



## Statistikhengst

High_Gravity said:


> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Yes and if neither of you have the money or time to take trips to be with each other occasionally it will burn to the ground quicker than a wooden bbq grill. A long distance relationship maybe could have worked like 60 years ago when people were more conservative and wrote letters but in this generation now of the Jersey Shore and Miley Cyrus, its doomed to failure. People want their pleasure now, not later down the line. Very few people wait for something good anymore.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I agree with you. Too many instant-tea temptations for partners in a long-distance relationship these day.
> 
> I have a buddy whose girlfriend was literally texting with another guy with whom she was having an affair, during dinner with my buddy at a ritzy restaurant in Columbus, OH. A waiter with a very hot plate walked by, slipped, part of the plate touched her arm, she screamed, the Iphone flew threw the air, landed in my buddy's hands and he read stuff like "please fill me up with your hot juice. XXX works graveyard tomorrow.".
> 
> My buddy walked away from the table and never looked back. Her stuff was on the curb within 4 hours, the locks were changed and he drank himself into a stupor. It was pretty ugly.
> 
> Texting about fucking with your affair while eating a nice dinner with your boyfriend. Pretty fucking crass.
> 
> I am starting to wonder how many divorces have been sparked by social media hanky panky....
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Nobody has any shame anymore, I know a guy who was deployed to Afghanistan for 8 months and his wife started an affair while he was gone. When he got back his unit had a welcome back party and his wife invited the new guy to the party and was texting him while he was there, her husband found the phone and saw the texts and proceeded to beat 7 shades of shit out of his wifes boyfriend. It was pretty ugly, I've seen it all people just want their pleasure and their orgasm they don't care.
Click to expand...


Yepp. I have frankly given up all hope of ever trusting a woman again. Cosi fan tutte.


----------



## AyeCantSeeYou

High_Gravity said:


> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Yes and if neither of you have the money or time to take trips to be with each other occasionally it will burn to the ground quicker than a wooden bbq grill. A long distance relationship maybe could have worked like 60 years ago when people were more conservative and wrote letters but in this generation now of the Jersey Shore and Miley Cyrus, its doomed to failure. People want their pleasure now, not later down the line. Very few people wait for something good anymore.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I agree with you. Too many instant-tea temptations for partners in a long-distance relationship these day.
> 
> I have a buddy whose girlfriend was literally texting with another guy with whom she was having an affair, during dinner with my buddy at a ritzy restaurant in Columbus, OH. A waiter with a very hot plate walked by, slipped, part of the plate touched her arm, she screamed, the Iphone flew threw the air, landed in my buddy's hands and he read stuff like "please fill me up with your hot juice. XXX works graveyard tomorrow.".
> 
> My buddy walked away from the table and never looked back. Her stuff was on the curb within 4 hours, the locks were changed and he drank himself into a stupor. It was pretty ugly.
> 
> Texting about fucking with your affair while eating a nice dinner with your boyfriend. Pretty fucking crass.
> 
> I am starting to wonder how many divorces have been sparked by social media hanky panky....
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Nobody has any shame anymore, I know a guy who was deployed to Afghanistan for 8 months and his wife started an affair while he was gone. When he got back his unit had a welcome back party and his wife invited the new guy to the party and was texting him while he was there, her husband found the phone and saw the texts and proceeded to beat 7 shades of shit out of his wifes boyfriend. It was pretty ugly, I've seen it all people just want their pleasure and their orgasm they don't care.
Click to expand...


People like that = SKANKS!


----------



## AyeCantSeeYou

Statistikhengst said:


> Yepp. I have frankly given up all hope of ever trusting a woman again. Cosi fan tutte.



I've given up on men. (I'm female, in case you didn't know.) I have yet to meet one that hasn't lied to or tried to deceive me.


----------



## CharlieH

Is there any skirt on here, I haven't seen any about..?


----------



## Statistikhengst

AyeCantSeeYou said:


> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> Yepp. I have frankly given up all hope of ever trusting a woman again. Cosi fan tutte.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I've given up on men. (I'm female, in case you didn't know.) I have yet to meet one that hasn't lied to or tried to deceive me.
Click to expand...



Is this a Harry met Sally moment?


----------



## Vox

High_Gravity said:


> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Yes and if neither of you have the money or time to take trips to be with each other occasionally it will burn to the ground quicker than a wooden bbq grill. A long distance relationship maybe could have worked like 60 years ago when people were more conservative and wrote letters but in this generation now of the Jersey Shore and Miley Cyrus, its doomed to failure. People want their pleasure now, not later down the line. Very few people wait for something good anymore.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I agree with you. Too many instant-tea temptations for partners in a long-distance relationship these day.
> 
> I have a buddy whose girlfriend was literally texting with another guy with whom she was having an affair, during dinner with my buddy at a ritzy restaurant in Columbus, OH. A waiter with a very hot plate walked by, slipped, part of the plate touched her arm, she screamed, the Iphone flew threw the air, landed in my buddy's hands and he read stuff like "please fill me up with your hot juice. XXX works graveyard tomorrow.".
> 
> My buddy walked away from the table and never looked back. Her stuff was on the curb within 4 hours, the locks were changed and he drank himself into a stupor. It was pretty ugly.
> 
> Texting about fucking with your affair while eating a nice dinner with your boyfriend. Pretty fucking crass.
> 
> I am starting to wonder how many divorces have been sparked by social media hanky panky....
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Nobody has any shame anymore, I know a guy who was deployed to Afghanistan for 8 months and his wife started an affair while he was gone. When he got back his unit had a welcome back party and his wife invited the new guy to the party and was texting him while he was there, her husband found the phone and saw the texts and proceeded to beat 7 shades of shit out of his wifes boyfriend. It was pretty ugly, I've seen it al*l people just want their pleasure and their orgasm they don't care*.
Click to expand...


and then complain why are they so miserable in life and commit suicides at 32.


----------



## Katzndogz

Oh a romance!  How exciting!


----------



## Vox

Katzndogz said:


> Oh a romance!  How exciting!



until they discover it is a long distance one 

but I wish them luck


----------



## Luissa

CharlieH said:


> Is there any skirt on here, I haven't seen any about..?




I wouldn't try to date on here, it won't end up well. 


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


----------



## Luissa

But it did work for Gunny and Phoenix, so who knows. 


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


----------



## WelfareQueen

High_Gravity said:


> Has anyone here tried a long distance relationship? I can't imagine how that would work these days.




I did years ago.  Twice.  Didn't work at all.  I wouldn't recommended it.  But now a true booty call relationship can kick ass.  Just some occasional friendly sex every now and then when you're both horny.  Very nice.


----------



## Esmeralda

JohnL.Burke said:


> Wow! LOL!!!! That was just dumb.
> Anyway,  I already figured the morons would just say their moron thing. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. I still think a singles site was a good idea but maybe this is just the wrong forum for that kind of thing. It was worth a try though.



I think it's a good idea. The morons are here, there and everywhere.  You just have to ignore them.  They seek attention; they are trolls.


----------



## BDBoop

Statistikhengst said:


> AyeCantSeeYou said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> Yepp. I have frankly given up all hope of ever trusting a woman again. Cosi fan tutte.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I've given up on men. (I'm female, in case you didn't know.) I have yet to meet one that hasn't lied to or tried to deceive me.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> 
> Is this a Harry met Sally moment?
Click to expand...


If she has an orgasm, and there's no one around to hear it - wait. What!?


----------



## Derideo_Te

AyeCantSeeYou said:


> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> Yepp. I have frankly given up all hope of ever trusting a woman again. Cosi fan tutte.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I've given up on men. (I'm female, in case you didn't know.) I have yet to meet one that hasn't lied to or tried to deceive me.
Click to expand...


It is sad that good people like Aye and Stat (and everyone else with similar experiences) have been cheated on by those they trusted. To me trust is the basis of a lasting relationship and it takes both parties to make it work. Sure, there are times when you are pissed off with each other but that isn't an excuse. There is also temptation but to give in to that shows a lack of character. 

I recall many decades ago going to a party with my spouse and the hostess introduced me as being the person who saved her marriage.  How that came about was purely happenstance. She had dropped around one afternoon to see my wife who was out at the time. I was cleaning the pool and while she was waiting for my wife to return we got chatting. She asked me about how we had stayed married for what was then almost a decade and I had replied that anything worth having was worth working for. What I didn't didn't know at the time was that she had come around to talk to my wife because she was thinking about leaving her husband. 

Apparently my advice was all she needed. She went back and sorted it out and they ended up having 2 sons and are still married. I never even knew that what I had said had any impact until the day of that party.


----------



## JohnL.Burke

BDBoop said:


> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> AyeCantSeeYou said:
> 
> 
> 
> I've given up on men. (I'm female, in case you didn't know.) I have yet to meet one that hasn't lied to or tried to deceive me.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Is this a Harry met Sally moment?
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> If she has an orgasm, and there's no one around to hear it - wait. What!?
Click to expand...


WAIT!!!! Women have orgasms?


----------



## Katzndogz

One of the early message boards was Newsmax.  Several couples met there, on-line and married.  It's not impossible.


----------



## Derideo_Te

Katzndogz said:


> One of the early message boards was Newsmax.  Several couples met there, on-line and married.  It's not impossible.



The earliest "on-line" community was the telegraph. Apparently that led to at least one marriage too.

Sacramento Daily Union 8 October 1872 ? California Digital Newspaper Collection



> Sacramento Daily Union, Volume 44, Number 6713, 8 October 1872
> 
> ROMANTIC MARRIAGE OF TELEGRAPH OPERATORS.
> [From the Journal of the Telepraph.] The report of Scudamore, the Director of Postal Telegraphs in Great Britain, contains a romance of the most original description . Alter saying how successful he has found tbe- system of employing male and fomale cleric together, and how much the tone of tbe mtn has beeu raised by the association, and ho» well the women perform the checking or fault finding branches of the work, he uoes on to Bpeak of friendships formed by clerks at either end of a telegraph wire. They begin by chatting in the intervals of their work, and very soon become fast friends. "It is a fact," com trues Scudamore, " that a telegraph cleik in London, who was engaged on a wire to Berlin, formed an acquaintance with, and an attachment for  mark the official style ot the language  a female clerk who worked on the same wire in Berlin ; that he made a proposal of marriage to her. and that she accepted him without having seen him. They were married, and the marriage resulting from the electiic affinities is supposed to have turned out as well as those in which the senses are more apparently concerned." Nor must tbe prudent reader run away with the idea that these ;oung persons were very rash, or that they married without due acquaintance. For it is a fact that a clerk at one end of a wire can readily tell, by fhe way iv which the clerk at the other end does his work, "whether he is passionate or sulky, cheerful or dull, sanguine or phlegmatic, ill-natured or good-natured."


----------



## WelfareQueen

JohnL.Burke said:


> BDBoop said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> Is this a Harry met Sally moment?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> If she has an orgasm, and there's no one around to hear it - wait. What!?
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> WAIT!!!! Women have orgasms?
Click to expand...



I think we've identified the problem.


----------



## Statistikhengst

JohnL.Burke said:


> BDBoop said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> Is this a Harry met Sally moment?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> If she has an orgasm, and there's no one around to hear it - wait. What!?
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> WAIT!!!! Women have orgasms?
Click to expand...


_*If you root around deep enough...*_


----------



## Statistikhengst

WelfareQueen said:


> JohnL.Burke said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> BDBoop said:
> 
> 
> 
> If she has an orgasm, and there's no one around to hear it - wait. What!?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> WAIT!!!! Women have orgasms?
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> 
> I think we've identified the problem.
Click to expand...


Well, one of them.

Your avis confuse me. First you are a huge black woman who has obviously eaten one potato chip too many, now you are a very gently gay guy.  

I iz confuzed.


----------



## Derideo_Te

Statistikhengst said:


> WelfareQueen said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> JohnL.Burke said:
> 
> 
> 
> WAIT!!!! Women have orgasms?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I think we've identified the problem.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Well, one of them.
> 
> Your avis confuse me. First you are a huge black woman who has obviously eaten one potato chip too many, now you are a very gently gay guy.
> 
> I iz confuzed.
Click to expand...


I suspect that you are not the one who is , Stat!


----------



## Statistikhengst

Derideo_Te said:


> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> WelfareQueen said:
> 
> 
> 
> I think we've identified the problem.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Well, one of them.
> 
> Your avis confuse me. First you are a huge black woman who has obviously eaten one potato chip too many, now you are a very gently gay guy.
> 
> I iz confuzed.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I suspect that you are not the one who is , Stat!
Click to expand...


Bow - Arrow - Target - Penetrate Target. Aaaahhhh! Wash. Rinse. Repeat.


----------



## AquaAthena

JohnL.Burke said:


> BDBoop said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> Is this a Harry met Sally moment?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> If she has an orgasm, and there's no one around to hear it - wait. What!?
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> WAIT!!!! Women have orgasms?
Click to expand...


----------



## Statistikhengst

AquaAthena said:


> JohnL.Burke said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> BDBoop said:
> 
> 
> 
> If she has an orgasm, and there's no one around to hear it - wait. What!?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> WAIT!!!! Women have orgasms?
> 
> Click to expand...
Click to expand...



And in the back of my head, I was just calculating to predict which buxom babe would be the first to respond to Burke's "astoundishment"**.  Hmmm, your name was almost at the very top of the list...

_***copyright Statistihengst, 2013*_


----------



## Statistikhengst

Derideo_Te said:


> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> WelfareQueen said:
> 
> 
> 
> I think we've identified the problem.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Well, one of them.
> 
> Your avis confuse me. First you are a huge black woman who has obviously eaten one potato chip too many, now you are a very gently gay guy.
> 
> I iz confuzed.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I suspect that you are not the one who is , Stat!
Click to expand...


Gotta dash to work but do ask me later about the story about a girl named Shiella and the 4 dimensions. You will like it.


----------



## Esmeralda

Statistikhengst said:


> Derideo_Te said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> Well, one of them.
> 
> Your avis confuse me. First you are a huge black woman who has obviously eaten one potato chip too many, now you are a very gently gay guy.
> 
> I iz confuzed.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I suspect that you are not the one who is , Stat!
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Bow - Arrow - Target - Penetrate Target. Aaaahhhh! Wash. Rinse. Repeat.
Click to expand...


----------



## Derideo_Te

Esmeralda said:


> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Derideo_Te said:
> 
> 
> 
> I suspect that you are not the one who is , Stat!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Bow - Arrow - Target - Penetrate Target. Aaaahhhh! Wash. Rinse. Repeat.
> 
> Click to expand...
Click to expand...


Yes, it would be nice to  play with those!


----------



## Statistikhengst

Esmeralda said:


> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Derideo_Te said:
> 
> 
> 
> I suspect that you are not the one who is , Stat!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Bow - Arrow - Target - Penetrate Target. Aaaahhhh! Wash. Rinse. Repeat.
> 
> Click to expand...
Click to expand...



I accept your gracious offer!


----------



## WelfareQueen

Statistikhengst said:


> WelfareQueen said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> JohnL.Burke said:
> 
> 
> 
> WAIT!!!! Women have orgasms?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I think we've identified the problem.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Well, one of them.
> 
> Your avis confuse me. First you are a huge black woman who has obviously eaten one potato chip too many, now you are a very gently gay guy.
> 
> I iz confuzed.
Click to expand...



Please....he is not gay....he is a young metrosexual pajama boy who lives with with mom and dad and cares passionately about health insurance.  Now your avi.....definitely gay.


----------



## Statistikhengst

WelfareQueen said:


> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> WelfareQueen said:
> 
> 
> 
> I think we've identified the problem.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Well, one of them.
> 
> Your avis confuse me. First you are a huge black woman who has obviously eaten one potato chip too many, now you are a very gently gay guy.
> 
> I iz confuzed.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> 
> Please....he is not gay....he is a young metrosexual pajama boy who lives with with mom and dad and cares passionately about health insurance.  Now your avi.....definitely gay.
Click to expand...



Haaaaa!!!

Hey, my dude is hetero. You know, we hetero dudes can also have hot bods!!


----------



## April

Sooo...who's gonna buy me a drink?


----------



## Statistikhengst

AngelsNDemons said:


> Sooo...who's gonna buy me a drink?




What'll it be, babe?


----------



## April

Statistikhengst said:


> AngelsNDemons said:
> 
> 
> 
> Sooo...who's gonna buy me a drink?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> What'll it be, babe?
Click to expand...


Jack and Cherry Coke pleeze... with lot's of cherries. 

Nice tighty you got on there...


----------



## Statistikhengst

AngelsNDemons said:


> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> AngelsNDemons said:
> 
> 
> 
> Sooo...who's gonna buy me a drink?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> What'll it be, babe?
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Jack and Cherry Coke pleeze... with lot's of cherries.
> 
> Nice tighty you got on there...
Click to expand...








I don't wear that tighty when sleeping.

Oh, and I love cherry, too.


----------



## April

Statistikhengst said:


> AngelsNDemons said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> What'll it be, babe?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Jack and Cherry Coke pleeze... with lot's of cherries.
> 
> Nice tighty you got on there...
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I don't wear that tighty when sleeping.
> 
> Oh, and I love cherry, too.
Click to expand...


Cherry be mah fave flave...


----------



## Statistikhengst

AngelsNDemons said:


> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> AngelsNDemons said:
> 
> 
> 
> Jack and Cherry Coke pleeze... with lot's of cherries.
> 
> Nice tighty you got on there...
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I don't wear that tighty when sleeping.
> 
> Oh, and I love cherry, too.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Cherry be mah fave flave...
Click to expand...


----------



## BDBoop

Obviously I won't be posting here anymore.

Thanks, John. You're a real peach.


----------



## JohnL.Burke

BDBoop said:


> Obviously I won't be posting here anymore.
> 
> Thanks, John. You're a real peach.



 Sorry you feel that way.


----------



## Mad_Cabbie

AyeCantSeeYou said:


> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> Yepp. I have frankly given up all hope of ever trusting a woman again. Cosi fan tutte.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I've given up on men. (I'm female, in case you didn't know.) I have yet to meet one that hasn't lied to or tried to deceive me.
Click to expand...





Oh, look - we both reside in the same awesome town! LOL!


----------



## Mad_Cabbie

Losing your life-partner, whether you were married or not is one of the most devastating humiliations you will ever face.

It's natures way of saying that you weren't good enough; that you needed to be replaced by a younger or better looking suitor. 

Compound that by the fact that you probably did it to yourself by being a selfish prick and voilà! Just another slap in the face to remind you that you failed ... and what's worse ... that you lost.

Look at it this way, though - out of all the people that tried to take her hand, she fancied your's above all others ~

I know, that doesn't help either. 

Just eat another ring-ding and fall asleep on the couch ... yet again....


----------



## AquaAthena

Mad_Cabbie said:


> Losing your life-partner, whether you were married or not is one of the most devastating humiliations you will ever face.




Yes, it is if your truly loved that person, though for myself, I wouldn't call it humiliation, more of a sorrowful tragedy. You not only lose your mate, you lose your history, your identity, mutual friends, often family, plans, dreams, and all those years you held in there trying everything you could think of to make it work while not losing your sense of self, or your soul, in the process

You notice the loss the first time you go grocery shopping for one.....


----------



## WelfareQueen

Cabbie and Aqua, 


I like you both.  You are good people.  I can't comment on what happened in either of your relationship situations because I wasn't there, but it does not change who you are.  I will have been married 20 years in February.  We have definitely had our ups and downs.  At times we have both made mistakes; I know I have at least.   


I think it is extremely rare that any situation is 100% one person's fault.  Whatever emotions still exist, I think the tendency is to beat yourself up.  Please don't.  Take honest responsibility for what is truly yours and let the rest go.  Forgiveness can be real difficult in these type of situations...sometimes forgiving yourself can be the hardest of all.  

Now on that note...let's have a drink.  I'm buying.


----------



## AquaAthena

WelfareQueen said:


> Cabbie and Aqua,
> 
> 
> I like you both.  You are good people.  I can't comment on what happened in either of your relationship situations because I wasn't there, but it does not change who you are.  I will have been married 20 years in February.  We have definitely had our ups and downs.  At times we have both made mistakes; I know I have at least.
> 
> 
> I think it is extremely rare that any situation is 100% one person's fault.  Whatever emotions still exist, I think the tendency is to beat yourself up.  Please don't.  Take honest responsibility for what is truly yours and let the rest go.  Forgiveness can be real difficult in these type of situations...sometimes forgiving yourself can be the hardest of all.
> 
> Now on that note...let's have a drink.  I'm buying.



Lol....well sweetheart, I wasn't assigning fault to anybody. Paths go off in different directions and I prefer to stay on the one I started out on. I am not a candidate for a permanent position in anyone's life. I am a free-spirit and can be the best I can be, when I am not cohabiting with a man. I have liked and loved all my men but there was only one that I am grateful to have known and been with, and grateful that it was over, with no regrets ever.  Our paths changed and one of us had to go along to get along, and I have never done that well, if at all. I have never beaten up on myself...are you KIDDING?!?!?!!?!?  

Some of us are just not meant to be in a marriage. It requires too much maturity, and that involves constraints. ***shudder*** 

I lke _being in like_, better than being in love. 

You will never have run across someone like me, who has had the best life has to offer and one reason is that I follow my dreams and make my own way. I am too much for any one man. I was told that by others for years, and didn't believe it but do now. lol

All is well. All is very well. I have designed my life and will continue to do so, and that involves one pretty good guy, infrequently....just the way I like it.


----------



## WelfareQueen

AquaAthena said:


> WelfareQueen said:
> 
> 
> 
> Cabbie and Aqua,
> 
> 
> I like you both.  You are good people.  I can't comment on what happened in either of your relationship situations because I wasn't there, but it does not change who you are.  I will have been married 20 years in February.  We have definitely had our ups and downs.  At times we have both made mistakes; I know I have at least.
> 
> 
> I think it is extremely rare that any situation is 100% one person's fault.  Whatever emotions still exist, I think the tendency is to beat yourself up.  Please don't.  Take honest responsibility for what is truly yours and let the rest go.  Forgiveness can be real difficult in these type of situations...sometimes forgiving yourself can be the hardest of all.
> 
> Now on that note...let's have a drink.  I'm buying.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Lol....well sweetheart, I wasn't assigning fault to anybody. Paths go off in different directions and I prefer to stay on the one I started out on. I am not a candidate for a permanent position in anyone's life. I am a free-spirit and can be the best I can be, when I am not cohabiting with a man. I have liked and loved all my men but there was only one that I am grateful to have known and been with, and grateful that it was over, with no regrets ever.  Our paths changed and one of us had to go along to get along, and I have never done that well, if at all. I have never beaten up on myself...are you KIDDING?!?!?!!?!?
> 
> Some of us are just not meant to be in a marriage. It requires too much maturity, and that involves constraints. ***shudder***
> 
> I lke _being in like_, better than being in love.
> 
> You will never have run across someone like me, who has had the best life has to offer and one reason is that I follow my dreams and make my own way. I am too much for any one man. I was told that by others for years, and didn't believe it but do now. lol
> 
> All is well. All is very well. I have designed my life and will continue to do so, and that involves one pretty good guy, infrequently....just the way I like it.
Click to expand...



Sounds good.  I am about as non-judgmental as it gets.  As long as it works for you it's all that matters.  I'm still buying the drinks though.


----------



## AquaAthena

WelfareQueen said:


> AquaAthena said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> WelfareQueen said:
> 
> 
> 
> Cabbie and Aqua,
> 
> 
> I like you both.  You are good people.  I can't comment on what happened in either of your relationship situations because I wasn't there, but it does not change who you are.  I will have been married 20 years in February.  We have definitely had our ups and downs.  At times we have both made mistakes; I know I have at least.
> 
> 
> I think it is extremely rare that any situation is 100% one person's fault.  Whatever emotions still exist, I think the tendency is to beat yourself up.  Please don't.  Take honest responsibility for what is truly yours and let the rest go.  Forgiveness can be real difficult in these type of situations...sometimes forgiving yourself can be the hardest of all.
> 
> Now on that note...let's have a drink.  I'm buying.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Lol....well sweetheart, I wasn't assigning fault to anybody. Paths go off in different directions and I prefer to stay on the one I started out on. I am not a candidate for a permanent position in anyone's life. I am a free-spirit and can be the best I can be, when I am not cohabiting with a man. I have liked and loved all my men but there was only one that I am grateful to have known and been with, and grateful that it was over, with no regrets ever.  Our paths changed and one of us had to go along to get along, and I have never done that well, if at all. I have never beaten up on myself...are you KIDDING?!?!?!!?!?
> 
> Some of us are just not meant to be in a marriage. It requires too much maturity, and that involves constraints. ***shudder***
> 
> I lke _being in like_, better than being in love.
> 
> You will never have run across someone like me, who has had the best life has to offer and one reason is that I follow my dreams and make my own way. I am too much for any one man. I was told that by others for years, and didn't believe it but do now. lol
> 
> All is well. All is very well. I have designed my life and will continue to do so, and that involves one pretty good guy, infrequently....just the way I like it.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> 
> Sounds good.  I am about as non-judgmental as it gets.  As long as it works for you it's all that matters.  I'm still buying the drinks though.
Click to expand...


Right! No blame, no fault, and no victims. It always takes two. 

And now for that drink you have so graciously offered ........one spicy Bloody Mary please, and thank you.


----------



## Mad_Cabbie

WelfareQueen said:


> Sounds good.  I am about as non-judgmental as it gets.  As long as it works for you it's all that matters.  I'm still buying the drinks though.



I'll take a tall Jack and Coke double, please! Make it three!


----------



## Mad_Cabbie

AquaAthena said:


> Right! No blame, no fault, and no victims. It always takes two.
> 
> And now for that drink you have so graciously offered ........one spicy Bloody Mary please, and thank you.



You should buy ME a drink, aside from being the new kid - I'm also "fresh meat" at the singles bar! LOL!


----------



## AquaAthena

Mad_Cabbie said:


> AquaAthena said:
> 
> 
> 
> Right! No blame, no fault, and no victims. It always takes two.
> 
> And now for that drink you have so graciously offered ........one spicy Bloody Mary please, and thank you.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> You should buy ME a drink, aside from being the new kid - I'm also "fresh meat" at the singles bar! LOL!
Click to expand...


I'm not interested in either, but thanks for the offering...

`Sides the kind of men I am interested in, wouldn't accept me buying them a drink.... Not that I would offer...lol


----------



## Mad_Cabbie

AquaAthena said:


> Mad_Cabbie said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> AquaAthena said:
> 
> 
> 
> Right! No blame, no fault, and no victims. It always takes two.
> 
> And now for that drink you have so graciously offered ........one spicy Bloody Mary please, and thank you.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> You should buy ME a drink, aside from being the new kid - I'm also "fresh meat" at the singles bar! LOL!
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I'm not interested in either, but thanks for the offering...
> 
> `Sides the kind of men I am interested in, wouldn't accept me buying them a drink....
Click to expand...


Let me get this straight - if I spend NO MONEY on a FAKE drink ... I have a shot? 



*Bartender - drinks for the house!*


To all my friends!!!


----------



## Mad_Cabbie

Anybody got any fake wings? I'm starving!!!


----------



## April

[MENTION=45886]Mad_Cabbie[/MENTION]

here ya go...






Thanks for the free drinks!


----------



## Mad_Cabbie

AngelsNDemons said:


> [MENTION=45886]Mad_Cabbie[/MENTION]
> 
> here ya go...



I would say thank you, but I'm a self-centered prick with an attitude and a chip on his shoulder from too many on-line ass-whippings. 

(stuffs face)


----------



## Mad_Cabbie

Mad Cabbie is trashed.

(ponders whether to get into fist-fight or hit on sexy lady who bought him wings ... opts instead for nap)


----------



## Statistikhengst

Mad_Cabbie said:


> Mad Cabbie is trashed.
> 
> (ponders whether to get into fist-fight or hit on sexy lady who bought him wings ... opts instead for nap)



I am thinking that in that position, getting laid is going to be a very difficult task for you.


----------



## April

Mad_Cabbie said:


> Mad Cabbie is trashed.
> 
> (ponders whether to get into fist-fight or hit on sexy lady who bought him wings ... opts instead for nap)



 

I see a bucket of water in your near future...


----------



## Mad_Cabbie

AngelsNDemons said:


> Mad_Cabbie said:
> 
> 
> 
> Mad Cabbie is trashed.
> 
> (ponders whether to get into fist-fight or hit on sexy lady who bought him wings ... opts instead for nap)
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I see a bucket of water in your near future...
Click to expand...


----------



## Derideo_Te

AngelsNDemons said:


> Mad_Cabbie said:
> 
> 
> 
> Mad Cabbie is trashed.
> 
> (ponders whether to get into fist-fight or hit on sexy lady who bought him wings ... opts instead for nap)
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I see a bucket of water in your near future...
Click to expand...


To stop him dry humping the sod?


----------



## April

Mad_Cabbie said:


> AngelsNDemons said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Mad_Cabbie said:
> 
> 
> 
> Mad Cabbie is trashed.
> 
> (ponders whether to get into fist-fight or hit on sexy lady who bought him wings ... opts instead for nap)
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I see a bucket of water in your near future...
> 
> Click to expand...
Click to expand...


----------



## April

Derideo_Te said:


> AngelsNDemons said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Mad_Cabbie said:
> 
> 
> 
> Mad Cabbie is trashed.
> 
> (ponders whether to get into fist-fight or hit on sexy lady who bought him wings ... opts instead for nap)
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I see a bucket of water in your near future...
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> To stop him dry humping the sod?
Click to expand...


 
I am thinking more so to make room for the others in need of a spot to take their 'naps' after spending their time here at the H&L Singles Bar..


----------



## earlycuyler

You are all shameless hussies. Except for me. I'm a slut.


----------



## April

earlycuyler said:


> You are all shameless hussies. Except for me. I'm a slut.



No no...remember, it's 'man-slut' ...get it right, dammit!


----------



## earlycuyler

AngelsNDemons said:


> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> You are all shameless hussies. Except for me. I'm a slut.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> No no...remember, it's 'man-slut' ...get it right, dammit!
Click to expand...


Either way, I'll get neked for a pa k of smokes.


----------



## Mad_Cabbie

AngelsNDemons said:


> Derideo_Te said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> AngelsNDemons said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I see a bucket of water in your near future...
> 
> 
> 
> 
> To stop him dry humping the sod?
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> 
> I am thinking more so to make room for the others in need of a spot to take their 'naps' after spending their time here at the H&L Singles Bar..
Click to expand...


----------



## earlycuyler

^Been here, done this.


----------



## WelfareQueen

AngelsNDemons said:


> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> You are all shameless hussies. Except for me. I'm a slut.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> No no...remember, it's 'man-slut' ...get it right, dammit!
Click to expand...



I used to be a man-slut.  Damn...it was fun.


----------



## April

earlycuyler said:


> AngelsNDemons said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> You are all shameless hussies. Except for me. I'm a slut.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> No no...remember, it's 'man-slut' ...get it right, dammit!
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Either way, I'll get neked for a pa k of smokes.
Click to expand...


 Damn youre a cheap date....
What you willing to do for a carton?


----------



## Derideo_Te

AngelsNDemons said:


> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> AngelsNDemons said:
> 
> 
> 
> No no...remember, it's 'man-slut' ...get it right, dammit!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Either way, I'll get neked for a pa k of smokes.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Damn youre a cheap date....
> What you willing to do for a carton?
Click to expand...


Not having smoked in over 30 years I decided I should find out what they cost these days.

What Does A Pack Of Cigarettes Cost In Each State Now? - The Awl

Range from $4.84 to $12.50 per pack! 

Assuming that someone is smoking a pack/day that comes out to $1766 to $4562 per year.

In real terms I have probably saved myself $100,000 over that period.


----------



## earlycuyler

Derideo_Te said:


> AngelsNDemons said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> Either way, I'll get neked for a pa k of smokes.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Damn youre a cheap date....
> What you willing to do for a carton?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Not having smoked in over 30 years I decided I should find out what they cost these days.
> 
> What Does A Pack Of Cigarettes Cost In Each State Now? - The Awl
> 
> Range from $4.84 to $12.50 per pack!
> 
> Assuming that someone is smoking a pack/day that comes out to $1766 to $4562 per year.
> 
> In real terms I have probably saved myself $100,000 over that period.
Click to expand...


Yes, they are expencive. Not like I said I'm a cheap slut.


----------



## earlycuyler

AngelsNDemons said:


> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> AngelsNDemons said:
> 
> 
> 
> No no...remember, it's 'man-slut' ...get it right, dammit!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Either way, I'll get neked for a pa k of smokes.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Damn youre a cheap date....
> What you willing to do for a carton?
Click to expand...


Likely eat it.


----------



## April

earlycuyler said:


> AngelsNDemons said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> Either way, I'll get neked for a pa k of smokes.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Damn youre a cheap date....
> What you willing to do for a carton?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Likely eat it.
Click to expand...


Um. I will not 'go there'.


----------



## earlycuyler

^Skeert.


----------



## April

Derideo_Te said:


> AngelsNDemons said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> Either way, I'll get neked for a pa k of smokes.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Damn youre a cheap date....
> What you willing to do for a carton?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Not having smoked in over 30 years I decided I should find out what they cost these days.
> 
> What Does A Pack Of Cigarettes Cost In Each State Now? - The Awl
> 
> Range from $4.84 to $12.50 per pack!
> 
> Assuming that someone is smoking a pack/day that comes out to $1766 to $4562 per year.
> 
> In real terms I have probably saved myself $100,000 over that period.
Click to expand...


So, he really doesn't come cheap then??? 
Dammit....(grumble$%#&!)


----------



## April

earlycuyler said:


> ^Skeert.


----------



## Montrovant

AngelsNDemons said:


> Derideo_Te said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> AngelsNDemons said:
> 
> 
> 
> Damn youre a cheap date....
> What you willing to do for a carton?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Not having smoked in over 30 years I decided I should find out what they cost these days.
> 
> What Does A Pack Of Cigarettes Cost In Each State Now? - The Awl
> 
> Range from $4.84 to $12.50 per pack!
> 
> Assuming that someone is smoking a pack/day that comes out to $1766 to $4562 per year.
> 
> In real terms I have probably saved myself $100,000 over that period.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> So, he really doesn't come cheap then???
> Dammit....(grumble$%#&!)
Click to expand...


That depends!

When I still smoked (I quit a year ago) I bought little cigars online for about a dollar a pack.


----------



## earlycuyler

Montrovant said:


> AngelsNDemons said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Derideo_Te said:
> 
> 
> 
> Not having smoked in over 30 years I decided I should find out what they cost these days.
> 
> What Does A Pack Of Cigarettes Cost In Each State Now? - The Awl
> 
> Range from $4.84 to $12.50 per pack!
> 
> Assuming that someone is smoking a pack/day that comes out to $1766 to $4562 per year.
> 
> In real terms I have probably saved myself $100,000 over that period.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> So, he really doesn't come cheap then???
> Dammit....(grumble$%#&!)
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> That depends!
> 
> When I still smoked (I quit a year ago) I bought little cigars online for about a dollar a pack.
Click to expand...


I thought they went after online tobacco guys.


----------



## Derideo_Te

AngelsNDemons said:


> Derideo_Te said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> AngelsNDemons said:
> 
> 
> 
> Damn youre a cheap date....
> What you willing to do for a carton?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Not having smoked in over 30 years I decided I should find out what they cost these days.
> 
> What Does A Pack Of Cigarettes Cost In Each State Now? - The Awl
> 
> Range from $4.84 to $12.50 per pack!
> 
> Assuming that someone is smoking a pack/day that comes out to $1766 to $4562 per year.
> 
> In real terms I have probably saved myself $100,000 over that period.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> So, he really doesn't come cheap then???
> Dammit....(grumble$%#&!)
Click to expand...


You could always charm EC into giving them up for you! After all I am sure you two could find something better to do together.  And with the money EC saves he could buy you nice things. Sounds like a win-win to me.


----------



## Jackson

Mad_Cabbie said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> I have a female friend whos mostly been single her whole life, she was married for a year when she was in the Military but thats about it, no kids or anything. I like her and shes an awesome person but she looks, acts and behaves as if she is 20 years old and shes 36, she dates men in their 20s too and gets really upset because they won't commit, just want sex, cheat on her and play games. That is what alot of people in their 20's do men or women, I dated a 20 year old for a while too last year. Is it possible if a person is single for such a long time they get stuck in time and just behave as if their 21 forever?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Avoid her like the plague.
> 
> She's a complete idiot.
> 
> People like her would not know a good man from a hole in the ground. They make you pay if you think that they care at all.
Click to expand...


Think about it.  Is she immature?


----------



## earlycuyler

Sluts only get stuff. That's why were sluts. Stuff and sex. Slut stuff, lol.


----------



## Montrovant

earlycuyler said:


> Montrovant said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> AngelsNDemons said:
> 
> 
> 
> So, he really doesn't come cheap then???
> Dammit....(grumble$%#&!)
> 
> 
> 
> 
> That depends!
> 
> When I still smoked (I quit a year ago) I bought little cigars online for about a dollar a pack.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I thought they went after online tobacco guys.
Click to expand...


Cigars were still in a different category than cigarettes, I think....although the government may have already changed that, there was talk of it when I was smoking.


----------



## Mad_Cabbie

Jackson said:


> Mad_Cabbie said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> I have a female friend whos mostly been single her whole life, she was married for a year when she was in the Military but thats about it, no kids or anything. I like her and shes an awesome person but she looks, acts and behaves as if she is 20 years old and shes 36, she dates men in their 20s too and gets really upset because they won't commit, just want sex, cheat on her and play games. That is what alot of people in their 20's do men or women, I dated a 20 year old for a while too last year. Is it possible if a person is single for such a long time they get stuck in time and just behave as if their 21 forever?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Avoid her like the plague.
> 
> She's a complete idiot.
> 
> People like her would not know a good man from a hole in the ground. They make you pay if you think that they care at all.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Think about it.  Is she immature?
Click to expand...


Not sure what you mean, but she should never get serious consideration to marry until she gets her head screwed on straight. 

Dating a 20 yr old when you are 36 is a VERY bad sign - it speaks volumes about you as a person.

What she is doing is beyond immature - it bi-passes immature and tests the outer boundaries of abject stupidity.


----------



## Papawx3

It's been said that most adults achieve "their adulthood" by the time they reach 25.  That is, by that age they have already become what they are going to be. 

Let her go. She's not worth your time.  Move on.


----------



## Diana1180

I take a short hiatus and the Singles Bar closes??


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> I take a short hiatus and the Singles Bar closes??



Did everyone get married or hook up? I'm still single btw, and had a total disaster of an experience with a 20 something year old from Alexandria smgdh


----------



## AyeCantSeeYou

Still single here. I'd say it's because I'm not looking, have noone in mind, and put my kids first.


----------



## Diana1180

High_Gravity said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> I take a short hiatus and the Singles Bar closes??
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Did everyone get married or hook up? I'm still single btw, and had a total disaster of an experience with a 20 something year old from Alexandria smgdh
Click to expand...


What did we say about those 20-somethings? lol


----------



## Diana1180

AyeCantSeeYou said:


> Still single here. I'd say it's because I'm not looking, have noone in mind, and put my kids first.



I havent been actively looking either.  I work and take care of my child.  If a great guy bumps into me, ok.  But it hasnt happened yet lol.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> I take a short hiatus and the Singles Bar closes??
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Did everyone get married or hook up? I'm still single btw, and had a total disaster of an experience with a 20 something year old from Alexandria smgdh
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> What did we say about those 20-somethings? lol
Click to expand...


I know I'm an idiot, I saw how she looked and still went for it smgdh, the thing is almost all the women my age all have kids and are looking for a father for them, my ex gf had kids and I was with her for 5 years, I cannot do that again. It may sound shallow but I want a woman by herself right now.


----------



## Diana1180

High_Gravity said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Did everyone get married or hook up? I'm still single btw, and had a total disaster of an experience with a 20 something year old from Alexandria smgdh
> 
> 
> 
> 
> What did we say about those 20-somethings? lol
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I know I'm an idiot, I saw how she looked and still went for it smgdh, the thing is almost all the women my age all have kids and are looking for a father for them, my ex gf had kids and I was with her for 5 years, I cannot do that again. It may sound shallow but I want a woman by herself right now.
Click to expand...


Doesnt sound shallow, its what works for you at this point in time.  They are out there, just might be harder to find.  Keep going with the 20-somethings and unless she is mature, you will keep being disappointed.


----------



## High_Gravity

I'm not saying I would not date a woman with kids at all but it has to be right, my ex bitched and moaned about her ex husband all the time, smh, I'm not trying to hear that all the time.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> What did we say about those 20-somethings? lol
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I know I'm an idiot, I saw how she looked and still went for it smgdh, the thing is almost all the women my age all have kids and are looking for a father for them, my ex gf had kids and I was with her for 5 years, I cannot do that again. It may sound shallow but I want a woman by herself right now.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Doesnt sound shallow, its what works for you at this point in time.  They are out there, just might be harder to find.  Keep going with the 20-somethings and unless she is mature, you will keep being disappointed.
Click to expand...


Everything sounded too good to be true, we were talking on the phone every day for 2 weeks and we were supposed to meet this past weekend, well Friday comes around and I don't hear from her at all. I have enough experience to know this a red flag, when you talk to a woman everyday and all of a sudden that changes with no explanation she has either met somebody else or having second thoughts. Than on Sunday she texts me and says the long distance thing is not going to work, I'm like well ok but you should have just told me that to begin with smgdh.


----------



## Esmeralda

High_Gravity said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Did everyone get married or hook up? I'm still single btw, and had a total disaster of an experience with a 20 something year old from Alexandria smgdh
> 
> 
> 
> 
> What did we say about those 20-somethings? lol
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I know I'm an idiot, I saw how she looked and still went for it smgdh, the thing is almost all the women my age all have kids and are looking for a father for them, my ex gf had kids and I was with her for 5 years, I cannot do that again. It may sound shallow but I want a woman by herself right now.
Click to expand...


I think if you don't have any children, then wanting a girlfriend who doesn't have children is completely reasonable. You will find more women who don't have children who are college grads--that is what statistics show.

If you have children and want a girlfriend who doesn't have children, I'd see that as hypocritical.  Just saying.


----------



## High_Gravity

Mad_Cabbie said:


> Jackson said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Mad_Cabbie said:
> 
> 
> 
> Avoid her like the plague.
> 
> She's a complete idiot.
> 
> People like her would not know a good man from a hole in the ground. They make you pay if you think that they care at all.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Think about it.  Is she immature?
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Not sure what you mean, but she should never get serious consideration to marry until she gets her head screwed on straight.
> 
> Dating a 20 yr old when you are 36 is a VERY bad sign - it speaks volumes about you as a person.
> 
> What she is doing is beyond immature - it bi-passes immature and tests the outer boundaries of abject stupidity.
Click to expand...


You pretty much nailed it, she is single again now the guy she was seeing has moved on, he was cheating on her anyways. She can't understand why she can't find a decent guy but the truth is the decent guys are around her, shes either ignoring them or putting them in the friend zone, I am over it she is going to be 37 this year, if she hasn't figured this out oh well.


----------



## Esmeralda

AyeCantSeeYou said:


> Still single here. I'd say it's because I'm not looking, have noone in mind, and put my kids first.



Don't wait too long. After a certain age, they stop throwing themselves at you everytime you turn around, and you actually have to make an effort.  Truth,


----------



## AyeCantSeeYou

Esmeralda said:


> AyeCantSeeYou said:
> 
> 
> 
> Still single here. I'd say it's because I'm not looking, have noone in mind, and put my kids first.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Don't wait too long. After a certain age, they stop throwing themselves at you everytime you turn around, and you actually have to make an effort.  Truth,
Click to expand...


In my case, I'm 45 and have a son that's autistic (he's 25) that I'll always have to take care of. I don't expect any man to want to deal with that. It'd be stupid of me to even think that there's someone out there that would want to be part of my life when I have a child that will always require supervision.


----------



## Esmeralda

AyeCantSeeYou said:


> Esmeralda said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> AyeCantSeeYou said:
> 
> 
> 
> Still single here. I'd say it's because I'm not looking, have noone in mind, and put my kids first.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Don't wait too long. After a certain age, they stop throwing themselves at you everytime you turn around, and you actually have to make an effort.  Truth,
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> In my case, I'm 45 and have a son that's autistic (he's 25) that I'll always have to take care of. I don't expect any man to want to deal with that. It'd be stupid of me to even think that there's someone out there that would want to be part of my life when I have a child that will always require supervision.
Click to expand...


I don't agree with that.  There will be someone who wants to be  part of your life though you have a child with problems.  It would be a very special guy, but there are men out their like that.


----------



## Spiderman

High_Gravity said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> I take a short hiatus and the Singles Bar closes??
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Did everyone get married or hook up? I'm still single btw, and had a total disaster of an experience with a 20 something year old from Alexandria smgdh
Click to expand...


Still single at 42.  Just a few moths ago a 2 year relationship ended.

We were shacking up I thought we were doing well. I told her from the very start that I wasn't the marrying kind.  Not that I am the type to sleep around or horn dog after women.  I was very content to be in an exclusive relationship.

Then she started getting pushy about getting married.  I held my ground, she gave me an ultimatum.

I don't like ultimatums so I asked her to move out. 

C'est la vie


----------



## Statistikhengst

AyeCantSeeYou said:


> Esmeralda said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> AyeCantSeeYou said:
> 
> 
> 
> Still single here. I'd say it's because I'm not looking, have noone in mind, and put my kids first.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Don't wait too long. After a certain age, they stop throwing themselves at you everytime you turn around, and you actually have to make an effort.  Truth,
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> In my case, I'm 45 and have a son that's autistic (he's 25) that I'll always have to take care of. I don't expect any man to want to deal with that. It'd be stupid of me to even think that there's someone out there that would want to be part of my life when I have a child that will always require supervision.
Click to expand...




You would be surprised. I had a cousin who was autistic. She lived until 42, if I recall. If a man really loves you, then he loves the entire family.


----------



## AyeCantSeeYou

Statistikhengst said:


> AyeCantSeeYou said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Esmeralda said:
> 
> 
> 
> Don't wait too long. After a certain age, they stop throwing themselves at you everytime you turn around, and you actually have to make an effort.  Truth,
> 
> 
> 
> 
> In my case, I'm 45 and have a son that's autistic (he's 25) that I'll always have to take care of. I don't expect any man to want to deal with that. It'd be stupid of me to even think that there's someone out there that would want to be part of my life when I have a child that will always require supervision.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> 
> 
> You would be surprised. I had a cousin who was autistic. She lived until 42, if I recall.* If a man really loves you, then he loves the entire family.*
Click to expand...


That's what I've always believed, which is why I'd rather not hold out hope for someone to come along than to let myself believe in something that might not ever happen.


----------



## AquaAthena

AyeCantSeeYou said:


> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> AyeCantSeeYou said:
> 
> 
> 
> In my case, I'm 45 and have a son that's autistic (he's 25) that I'll always have to take care of. I don't expect any man to want to deal with that. It'd be stupid of me to even think that there's someone out there that would want to be part of my life when I have a child that will always require supervision.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> You would be surprised. I had a cousin who was autistic. She lived until 42, if I recall.* If a man really loves you, then he loves the entire family.*
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> That's what I've always believed, which is why I'd rather not hold out hope for someone to come along than to let myself believe in something that might not ever happen.
Click to expand...


Good for you. Wisdom takes precedent over wishful thinking. You will be stronger in the long run but ready, in case something sweet does happen. 

Thanks for being such a good mom. Your son is blessed and so are you.


----------



## High_Gravity

Spiderman said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> I take a short hiatus and the Singles Bar closes??
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Did everyone get married or hook up? I'm still single btw, and had a total disaster of an experience with a 20 something year old from Alexandria smgdh
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Still single at 42.  Just a few moths ago a 2 year relationship ended.
> 
> We were shacking up I thought we were doing well. I told her from the very start that I wasn't the marrying kind.  Not that I am the type to sleep around or horn dog after women.  I was very content to be in an exclusive relationship.
> 
> Then she started getting pushy about getting married.  I held my ground, she gave me an ultimatum.
> 
> I don't like ultimatums so I asked her to move out.
> 
> C'est la vie
Click to expand...


I went through the same thing with my ex, we were together 5 years and I told her from the beginning marriage isn't for me, the last year she pestered the hell out of me about getting engaged and than the cheating started, smmfh.


----------



## AquaAthena

Spiderman said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> I take a short hiatus and the Singles Bar closes??
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Did everyone get married or hook up? I'm still single btw, and had a total disaster of an experience with a 20 something year old from Alexandria smgdh
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Still single at 42.  Just a few moths ago a 2 year relationship ended.
> 
> We were shacking up I thought we were doing well. I told her from the very start that I wasn't the marrying kind.  Not that I am the type to sleep around or horn dog after women.  I was very content to be in an exclusive relationship.
> 
> Then she started getting pushy about getting married.  I held my ground, she gave me an ultimatum.
> 
> I don't like ultimatums so I asked her to move out.
> 
> C'est la vie
Click to expand...


Interesting!! Had she been wise, after you confessed your objections to marriage, she would not have entered into a living arrangement with you. She made a lousy choice. 

If I were interested in having a permanent relationship with a man, I wouldn't do it without marrying him, not that that guarantees anything but it _does_ speak to his sincere willingness to a committed love, rather than a convenient one. JMHO. It adds a specialness to a union, however temporary of permanent.


----------



## Diana1180

Spiderman said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> I take a short hiatus and the Singles Bar closes??
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Did everyone get married or hook up? I'm still single btw, and had a total disaster of an experience with a 20 something year old from Alexandria smgdh
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Still single at 42.  Just a few moths ago a 2 year relationship ended.
> 
> We were shacking up I thought we were doing well. I told her from the very start that I wasn't the marrying kind.  Not that I am the type to sleep around or horn dog after women.  I was very content to be in an exclusive relationship.
> 
> Then she started getting pushy about getting married.  I held my ground, she gave me an ultimatum.
> 
> I don't like ultimatums so I asked her to move out.
> 
> C'est la vie
Click to expand...


She probably thought she could change your mind lol.  

I have been married, not sure I want to do it again.  I would be happy in a monogomous commited relationship.  But would also be happy getting married again if he wanted.

Getting to a point where I really dont care anymore lol.


----------



## Connery

I've had long-term relationships with women with children and the word love was more a verb than an emotion. In each of those situations I had grown to feel an affection towards those children, however, my actions spoke to a great deal of support financially as well as emotionally, providing shelter, giving direction and advice and  cooking some great food.


I would not expect anyone to love or accept my son as I do, that is not a requirement. Respect for my relationship with him and for him as person is definitely required.


----------



## Spiderman

AquaAthena said:


> Spiderman said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Did everyone get married or hook up? I'm still single btw, and had a total disaster of an experience with a 20 something year old from Alexandria smgdh
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Still single at 42.  Just a few moths ago a 2 year relationship ended.
> 
> We were shacking up I thought we were doing well. I told her from the very start that I wasn't the marrying kind.  Not that I am the type to sleep around or horn dog after women.  I was very content to be in an exclusive relationship.
> 
> Then she started getting pushy about getting married.  I held my ground, she gave me an ultimatum.
> 
> I don't like ultimatums so I asked her to move out.
> 
> C'est la vie
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Interesting!! Had she been wise, after you confessed your objections to marriage, she would not have entered into a living arrangement with you. She made a lousy choice.
Click to expand...


Hey!



> If I were interested in having a permanent relationship with a man, I wouldn't do it without marrying him, not that that guarantees anything but it _does_ speak to his sincere willingness to a committed love, rather than a convenient one. JMHO. It adds a specialness to a union, however temporary of permanent.



We talked at length about it I was completely honest about not wanting to get married or have kids she never mentioned that she wanted to get married in the future.  I quite believed she was OK with a committed but unmarried arrangement. I think she had a change of heart about not having kids.  I get it.


----------



## Spiderman

Diana1180 said:


> Spiderman said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Did everyone get married or hook up? I'm still single btw, and had a total disaster of an experience with a 20 something year old from Alexandria smgdh
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Still single at 42.  Just a few moths ago a 2 year relationship ended.
> 
> We were shacking up I thought we were doing well. I told her from the very start that I wasn't the marrying kind.  Not that I am the type to sleep around or horn dog after women.  I was very content to be in an exclusive relationship.
> 
> Then she started getting pushy about getting married.  I held my ground, she gave me an ultimatum.
> 
> I don't like ultimatums so I asked her to move out.
> 
> C'est la vie
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> She probably thought she could change your mind lol.
> 
> I have been married, not sure I want to do it again.  I would be happy in a monogomous commited relationship.  But would also be happy getting married again if he wanted.
> 
> Getting to a point where I really dont care anymore lol.
Click to expand...


The old I love you now change for me thing.

I think she had a change of heart about not having kids so she pressured me to marry.

She knew that would end the relationship.


----------



## Mad_Cabbie

I am only single when viewed as half of a whole; yet, I surmise that very often ... one feels better than two. 

Furthermore; it requires less maintenance.


----------



## Noomi

I have been single forever and I like it. Never had the desire to share my life with someone lol.


----------



## JohnL.Burke

I'm a  bit broken. I'm lucky to maintain a civil relationship with my cat.


----------



## Statistikhengst

JohnL.Burke said:


> I'm a  bit broken. I'm lucky to maintain a civil relationship with my cat.




Sorry to hear that, dude.

My dog is dying, so that doesn't make things too rosy for me.


----------



## Katzndogz

JohnL.Burke said:


> I'm a  bit broken. I'm lucky to maintain a civil relationship with my cat.



You must have a very tolerant cat who lets you get away with a lot.


----------



## JohnL.Burke

Statistikhengst said:


> JohnL.Burke said:
> 
> 
> 
> I'm a  bit broken. I'm lucky to maintain a civil relationship with my cat.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Sorry to hear that, dude.
> 
> My dog is dying, so that doesn't make things too rosy for me.
Click to expand...


 It's alway excruciating to lose a pet. Sorry.


----------



## JohnL.Burke

Katzndogz said:


> JohnL.Burke said:
> 
> 
> 
> I'm a  bit broken. I'm lucky to maintain a civil relationship with my cat.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> You must have a very tolerant cat who lets you get away with a lot.
Click to expand...


 What happens in the litter box stays in the litter box.


----------



## AquaAthena

JohnL.Burke said:


> Katzndogz said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> JohnL.Burke said:
> 
> 
> 
> I'm a  bit broken. I'm lucky to maintain a civil relationship with my cat.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> You must have a very tolerant cat who lets you get away with a lot.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> What happens in the litter box stays in the litter box.
Click to expand...


   ( not for long I do hope )


----------



## nitroz

1 alcohol, please.


----------



## Mad_Cabbie

Just call me nympho when I'm drinking, baby.


----------



## Diana1180

Should we call you that now, or will you let us know when your drinking?


----------



## Derideo_Te

Diana1180 said:


> Should we call you that now, or will you let us know when your drinking?



Wouldn't being sober spoil MC's reputation?


----------



## Statistikhengst

Mad_Cabbie said:


> Just call me nympho when I'm drinking, baby.




Ahhh, that's the spirit, Kumpel!


----------



## Mad_Cabbie

If I drink to forget, I try to pay up front.


----------



## Mad_Cabbie

Derideo_Te said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> Should we call you that now, or will you let us know when your drinking?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Wouldn't being sober spoil MC's reputation?
Click to expand...


I never worry about my rep - I could never be any more disreputable.


----------



## High_Gravity

Still here still single, I'll have a glass of Pinot and some hot wings please.


----------



## High_Gravity

Well I went out to a few clubs this weekend and everything seemed so different to me, I don't know how I did this so much back in my 20s. Having to yell in a womans face to talk to her with loud music bumping is a fail right there.


----------



## JohnL.Burke

I went through the same thing. I remember walking into a club and being bothered on how loud the music was. That's when I knew I was too old for this sh*t. After my night club phase I entered my small dark hole-in-the-wall bar phase. In terms of meeting nice ladies, I found out that I did much better in bars than night clubs. Probably because the music wasn't as loud.


----------



## AquaAthena

JohnL.Burke said:


> I went through the same thing. I remember walking into a club and being bothered on how loud the music was. That's when I knew I was too old for this sh*t. After my night club phase I entered my small dark hole-in-the-wall bar phase. In terms of meeting nice ladies, I found out that I did much better in bars than night clubs. Probably because the music wasn't as loud.



I DO love me some loud music, but only if I plan on doing some hot dancing movements on the dance floor. Loud and live, is even better. 

If I would be there to meet someone, though, I would like the music to be background music. Mellow with a beat.


----------



## High_Gravity

JohnL.Burke said:


> I went through the same thing. I remember walking into a club and being bothered on how loud the music was. That's when I knew I was too old for this sh*t. After my night club phase I entered my small dark hole-in-the-wall bar phase. In terms of meeting nice ladies, I found out that I did much better in bars than night clubs. Probably because the music wasn't as loud.



I found a nice place for Happy Hours with decent drink prices, so I'll probably head over there this Thursday for a quick drink after work. We were young once.


----------



## High_Gravity

Do people even meet in clubs anymore? I talked to a few people and they were just not interested.


----------



## AquaAthena

High_Gravity said:


> Do people even meet in clubs anymore? I talked to a few people and they were just not interested.



High_Gravity, have you tried Internet dating sites?? Before I met my current sweetheart, I was on two of them in different years, and met a lot of frogs. I learned HOW to do those sites to avoid that, though. 

I also married a very good guy I met on one of them, but it only lasted one year and 4 months. Long distance relationships do not allow for that crucial getting to know one another better, stage.


----------



## AquaAthena

High_Gravity said:


> Do people even meet in clubs anymore? I talked to a few people and they were just not interested.



Maybe you are just too decent of a fellow and are attracted to girls not recognizing those qualities, anymore.


----------



## High_Gravity

AquaAthena said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Do people even meet in clubs anymore? I talked to a few people and they were just not interested.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity, have you tried Internet dating sites?? Before I met my current sweetheart, I was on two of them in different years, and met a lot of frogs. I learned HOW to do those sites to avoid that, though.
> 
> I also married a very good guy I met on one of them, but it only lasted one year and 4 months. Long distance relationships do not allow for that crucial getting to know one another better, stage.
Click to expand...


I have been using on line dating for the past year and a half after my break up, it worked for a few one nighters but nothing more, I got rid of my profiles on those sites and was trying to meet people the old fashioned way smh


----------



## High_Gravity

AquaAthena said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Do people even meet in clubs anymore? I talked to a few people and they were just not interested.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Maybe you are just too decent of a fellow and are attracted to girls not recognizing those qualities, anymore.
Click to expand...


Hmm maybe, it just seemed like people were speaking a different language in there.


----------



## AquaAthena

High_Gravity said:


> AquaAthena said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Do people even meet in clubs anymore? I talked to a few people and they were just not interested.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Maybe you are just too decent of a fellow and are attracted to girls not recognizing those qualities, anymore.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Hmm maybe, it just seemed like people were speaking a different language in there.
Click to expand...


If they are speaking a different language, then perhaps you are going after the wrong demographic segment?


----------



## High_Gravity

AquaAthena said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> AquaAthena said:
> 
> 
> 
> Maybe you are just too decent of a fellow and are attracted to girls not recognizing those qualities, anymore.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Hmm maybe, it just seemed like people were speaking a different language in there.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> If they are speaking a different language, then perhaps you are going after the wrong demographic segment?
Click to expand...


I think I made the mistake of looking at myself as the same person I was when I was 25.


----------



## AyeCantSeeYou

High_Gravity said:


> AquaAthena said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Do people even meet in clubs anymore? I talked to a few people and they were just not interested.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Maybe you are just too decent of a fellow and are attracted to girls not recognizing those qualities, anymore.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Hmm maybe, it just seemed like people were speaking a different language in there.
Click to expand...


Think about what it is you want in someone - then think about where that type of person would be. If you want someone that is a drinker and partier, then by all means go to bars and clubs. If you want someone with more depth, try parks, libraries, and book stores.


----------



## High_Gravity

Well some of my co workers are talking about setting me up with a girl who works in a different office down town shes like Indian or something which is cool, I'm not gonna stress it if it happens it happens.


----------



## Esmeralda

High_Gravity said:


> Well some of my co workers are talking about setting me up with a girl who works in a different office down town shes like Indian or something which is cool, I'm not gonna stress it if it happens it happens.



Maybe you should just look at it as meeting nice people and making friends instead of focusing too much on looking for a girlfriend.  The more people you meet, the larger your social circle, the  more likely you are to meet that special person when you weren't particularly expecting to.


----------



## Statistikhengst

Esmeralda said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Well some of my co workers are talking about setting me up with a girl who works in a different office down town shes like Indian or something which is cool, I'm not gonna stress it if it happens it happens.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Maybe you should just look at it as meeting nice people and making friends instead of focusing too much on looking for a girlfriend.  The more people you meet, the larger your social circle, the  more likely you are to meet that special person when you weren't particularly expecting to.
Click to expand...


----------



## High_Gravity

Esmeralda said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Well some of my co workers are talking about setting me up with a girl who works in a different office down town shes like Indian or something which is cool, I'm not gonna stress it if it happens it happens.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Maybe you should just look at it as meeting nice people and making friends instead of focusing too much on looking for a girlfriend.  The more people you meet, the larger your social circle, the  more likely you are to meet that special person when you weren't particularly expecting to.
Click to expand...


Well either way, I haven't heard anything since my co worker sent her a pic of me Wednesday so I'm assuming this went nowhere as usual, don't know why I even bother. I should have just sent her a pic of Vin Diesel smh.


----------



## High_Gravity

Well scratch that the pic was never sent smh, were exhanging emails now.


----------



## High_Gravity

Well scratch that, waste of time Sunday and I'm still single. Pass the hot wings and Guiness!


----------



## Katzndogz

The one thing I never permitted was being set up.  It happened only once when a friend set me up.  Knowing this was something I would never accept, my friend didn't tell me so I had no chance to refuse.  I did not turn into a screaming Harriman at the time.  I simply said I did not appreciate being handed off for someone to take out like I was trash.  Then I left and never spoke to that ex friend again.


----------



## High_Gravity

Katzndogz said:


> The one thing I never permitted was being set up.  It happened only once when a friend set me up.  Knowing this was something I would never accept, my friend didn't tell me so I had no chance to refuse.  I did not turn into a screaming Harriman at the time.  I simply said I did not appreciate being handed off for someone to take out like I was trash.  Then I left and never spoke to that ex friend again.



You were right not to do it, it was a terrible experience. This is my first and only time doing it.


----------



## High_Gravity

Ok question for the women, if you dated a guy once, it didn't work out, and you just wanted to be friends, why would you ask to see him again? you've already established you don't see him in that way, why do this? seems like a slap in the face to me.


----------



## High_Gravity

So did everyone here get married or something? hook me up with a gin and tonic and some tater skins!


----------



## earlycuyler

Anyone want some penis ?


----------



## AquaAthena

High_Gravity said:


> Katzndogz said:
> 
> 
> 
> The one thing I never permitted was being set up.  It happened only once when a friend set me up.  Knowing this was something I would never accept, my friend didn't tell me so I had no chance to refuse.  I did not turn into a screaming Harriman at the time.  I simply said I did not appreciate being handed off for someone to take out like I was trash.  Then I left and never spoke to that ex friend again.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> You were right not to do it, it was a terrible experience. This is my first and only time doing it.
Click to expand...


I wouldn't be for a set up, either. I might, if it were for a phone-call, first, and only then if I knew more about the date, from my friend who would set me up. I would have to like what I heard. Sometimes not having the advantage of seeing someone in person, can be a good thing as one can't be influenced by a possible physical attraction.


----------



## High_Gravity

AquaAthena said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Katzndogz said:
> 
> 
> 
> The one thing I never permitted was being set up.  It happened only once when a friend set me up.  Knowing this was something I would never accept, my friend didn't tell me so I had no chance to refuse.  I did not turn into a screaming Harriman at the time.  I simply said I did not appreciate being handed off for someone to take out like I was trash.  Then I left and never spoke to that ex friend again.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> You were right not to do it, it was a terrible experience. This is my first and only time doing it.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I wouldn't be for a set up, either. I might, if it were for a phone-call, first, and only then if I knew more about the date, from my friend who would set me up. I would have to like what I heard. Sometimes not having the advantage of seeing someone in person, can be a good thing as one can't be influenced by a possible physical attraction.
Click to expand...


It sounded like a good idea in the beginning but now I regret it, me and her are still the talk of office gossip even though we only went out once 6 weeks ago, they know her because she used to work here. Never again, "setting up" people is like me and you taking our dogs for a walk, just because we like each other does not mean they will.


----------



## High_Gravity

Saki bombs on me!


----------



## earlycuyler

High_Gravity said:


> Saki bombs on me!



Those are all mine right ?


----------



## High_Gravity

earlycuyler said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Saki bombs on me!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Those are all mine right ?
Click to expand...


LMAO! Sure.


----------



## earlycuyler

High_Gravity said:


> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Saki bombs on me!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Those are all mine right ?
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> LMAO! Sure.
Click to expand...


I may just get ripped after this day. Long one !


----------



## High_Gravity

earlycuyler said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> Those are all mine right ?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> LMAO! Sure.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I may just get ripped after this day. Long one !
Click to expand...


I'm doing Happy Hour after work, free hot wings and smoking indoors? I am there.


----------



## JohnL.Burke

So I'm doing the dating website thing when a girl asks me if I'm adventurous. I say yes since I do like a little excitement in my life. For example, I watched The Goonies last week. I guess these days I'm probably a little excitement shy since most of my life has been "exciting". Exciting in a David Lynch, Stephen King, Salvador Dali, Last Temptation Of Christ sort of way. However, there is still a part of me that wants to turn over rocks that are better left unturned. Oh sure, the lady probably meant "excitement" in a skydiving, rock climbing sort of way while my definition of "excitement" is probably a little more nightmarishly cerebral. 
  Of course my life seems to contain some sort of surreal  flux density creating  magnetic properties when it comes to attracting the unexpected. HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT "EXCITEMENT" WAS A WAY OF ASKING ME IF I DATE TRANSVESTITES? Was there a meeting that I missed? Shouldn't these dating sites have a list of questions and phrases that are decoded for the unsuspecting, naive love lorn? Anyway, making a long story short.... yadda yadda yadda... I might be engaged to a truck driver named Stan.


----------



## Statistikhengst

JohnL.Burke said:


> So I'm doing the dating website thing when a girl asks me if I'm adventurous. I say yes since I do like a little excitement in my life. For example, I watched The Goonies last week. I guess these days I'm probably a little excitement shy since most of my life has been "exciting". Exciting in a David Lynch, Stephen King, Salvador Dali, Last Temptation Of Christ sort of way. However, there is still a part of me that wants to turn over rocks that are better left unturned. Oh sure, the lady probably meant "excitement" in a skydiving, rock climbing sort of way while my definition of "excitement" is probably a little more nightmarishly cerebral.
> Of course my life seems to contain some sort of surreal  flux density creating  magnetic properties when it comes to attracting the unexpected. *HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT "EXCITEMENT" WAS A WAY OF ASKING ME IF I DATE TRANSVESTITES?* Was there a meeting that I missed? Shouldn't these dating sites have a list of questions and phrases that are decoded for the unsuspecting, naive love lorn? Anyway, making a long story short.... yadda yadda yadda... I might be engaged to a truck driver named Stan.




Omg.....


Feeling for you there, bro.

Did you got out with her?


----------



## BDBoop

High_Gravity said:


> Well I went out to a few clubs this weekend and everything seemed so different to me, I don't know how I did this so much back in my 20s. Having to yell in a womans face to talk to her with loud music bumping is a fail right there.



Time to find you a jazz club, my friend.


----------



## JohnL.Burke

Statistikhengst said:


> JohnL.Burke said:
> 
> 
> 
> So I'm doing the dating website thing when a girl asks me if I'm adventurous. I say yes since I do like a little excitement in my life. For example, I watched The Goonies last week. I guess these days I'm probably a little excitement shy since most of my life has been "exciting". Exciting in a David Lynch, Stephen King, Salvador Dali, Last Temptation Of Christ sort of way. However, there is still a part of me that wants to turn over rocks that are better left unturned. Oh sure, the lady probably meant "excitement" in a skydiving, rock climbing sort of way while my definition of "excitement" is probably a little more nightmarishly cerebral.
> Of course my life seems to contain some sort of surreal  flux density creating  magnetic properties when it comes to attracting the unexpected. *HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT "EXCITEMENT" WAS A WAY OF ASKING ME IF I DATE TRANSVESTITES?* Was there a meeting that I missed? Shouldn't these dating sites have a list of questions and phrases that are decoded for the unsuspecting, naive love lorn? Anyway, making a long story short.... yadda yadda yadda... I might be engaged to a truck driver named Stan.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Omg.....
> 
> 
> Feeling for you there, bro.
> 
> Did you got out with her?
Click to expand...


LOL! No, luckily for me he made a very unattractive woman. We just wrote each other a couple of times on the dating site. Nothing remotely untoward. How is the weather where you live kind of stuff. I just thought it was weird that  "adventurous" was code for transvestite. Is this common knowledge? I guess it is.


----------



## Esmeralda

High_Gravity said:


> Still here still single, I'll have a glass of Pinot and some hot wings please.



I think the best way to meet someone is not at clubs or bars or internet dating but through mutual interests.  People who meet at a local sports bar to watch their team play, for example.  If  you run, you might meet someone at a 5K or 10K run.  I know someone who hung our regularly at a certain coffee shop he liked, got to know one of the waitresses and ended up married.  Maybe you should look into Meetup: About Meetup - Meetup
They do a lot of different type of activities.  [ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o-wEwg6iyvc]What is Meetup Tutorial - YouTube[/ame]


----------



## Samson

BDBoop said:


> I'm an introvert. My solitude is very important to me, probably comparable to water for the rest of humanity. I am a confirmed bachelor with a 13-year marriage in my past.



So your a girl that won't spend the night.



You've met all my criteria.


----------



## BDBoop

Esmeralda said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Still here still single, I'll have a glass of Pinot and some hot wings please.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I think the best way to meet someone is not at clubs or bars or internet dating but through mutual interests.  People who meet at a local sports bar to watch their team play, for example.  If  you run, you might meet someone at a 5K or 10K run.  I know someone who hung our regularly at a certain coffee shop he liked, got to know one of the waitresses and ended up married.  Maybe you should look into Meetup: About Meetup - Meetup
> They do a lot of different type of activities.  [ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o-wEwg6iyvc]What is Meetup Tutorial - YouTube[/ame]
Click to expand...


I've already sent him there four times.  Maybe he'll listen to you!


----------



## BDBoop

Samson said:


> BDBoop said:
> 
> 
> 
> I'm an introvert. My solitude is very important to me, probably comparable to water for the rest of humanity. I am a confirmed bachelor with a 13-year marriage in my past.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> So your a girl that won't spend the night.
> 
> 
> 
> You've met all my criteria.
Click to expand...


I knew that someday, 'breathing' would earn me points!!!


----------



## High_Gravity

Esmeralda said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Still here still single, I'll have a glass of Pinot and some hot wings please.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I think the best way to meet someone is not at clubs or bars or internet dating but through mutual interests.  People who meet at a local sports bar to watch their team play, for example.  If  you run, you might meet someone at a 5K or 10K run.  I know someone who hung our regularly at a certain coffee shop he liked, got to know one of the waitresses and ended up married.  Maybe you should look into Meetup: About Meetup - Meetup
> They do a lot of different type of activities.  [ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o-wEwg6iyvc]What is Meetup Tutorial - YouTube[/ame]
Click to expand...


Its funny that you mention that I am going on a 5K run with some co workers next month its a glow run or something like that.


----------



## High_Gravity

JohnL.Burke said:


> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> JohnL.Burke said:
> 
> 
> 
> So I'm doing the dating website thing when a girl asks me if I'm adventurous. I say yes since I do like a little excitement in my life. For example, I watched The Goonies last week. I guess these days I'm probably a little excitement shy since most of my life has been "exciting". Exciting in a David Lynch, Stephen King, Salvador Dali, Last Temptation Of Christ sort of way. However, there is still a part of me that wants to turn over rocks that are better left unturned. Oh sure, the lady probably meant "excitement" in a skydiving, rock climbing sort of way while my definition of "excitement" is probably a little more nightmarishly cerebral.
> Of course my life seems to contain some sort of surreal  flux density creating  magnetic properties when it comes to attracting the unexpected. *HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT "EXCITEMENT" WAS A WAY OF ASKING ME IF I DATE TRANSVESTITES?* Was there a meeting that I missed? Shouldn't these dating sites have a list of questions and phrases that are decoded for the unsuspecting, naive love lorn? Anyway, making a long story short.... yadda yadda yadda... I might be engaged to a truck driver named Stan.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Omg.....
> 
> 
> Feeling for you there, bro.
> 
> Did you got out with her?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> LOL! No, luckily for me he made a very unattractive woman. We just wrote each other a couple of times on the dating site. Nothing remotely untoward. How is the weather where you live kind of stuff. I just thought it was weird that  "adventurous" was code for transvestite. Is this common knowledge? I guess it is.
Click to expand...


Thats out of the norm, usually transvestites keep to themselves.


----------



## AquaAthena

High_Gravity said:


> JohnL.Burke said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> Omg.....
> 
> 
> Feeling for you there, bro.
> 
> Did you got out with her?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> LOL! No, luckily for me he made a very unattractive woman. We just wrote each other a couple of times on the dating site. Nothing remotely untoward. How is the weather where you live kind of stuff. I just thought it was weird that  "adventurous" was code for transvestite. Is this common knowledge? I guess it is.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Thats out of the norm, usually transvestites keep to themselves.
Click to expand...

*
Not all transgenders do, though.* 

Transgender mayor selling shoes from own closet to boost Oregon city's budget - NY Daily News

 The first openly transgender mayor in the nation is selling a pair of history - his shoe collection - to raise money for the city of Silverton, Ore.

Stu Rasmussen has a passion for shoes and a hell of a closet full of them, including a pair of floral-patterned snakeskin stilettos that are available on eBay for $10,000.

Silverton, a city with a population of nearly 9,200, has a healthy budget of about $22.5 million and $5.8 million for the general fund, according to Silverton city manager Bill Willoughby.


----------



## earlycuyler

I got one for y'all. After how many dates do you gals introduce young children to your dates, and guys, when or at what point are you okay with it. And would you ever introduce or meet the children of people you are seeing strictly for sex.


----------



## BDBoop

earlycuyler said:


> I got one for y'all. After how many dates do you gals introduce young children to your dates, and guys, when or at what point are you okay with it.



Not until it's serious.


----------



## AquaAthena

earlycuyler said:


> I got one for y'all. After how many dates do you gals introduce young children to your dates, and guys, when or at what point are you okay with it. And would you ever introduce or meet the children of people you are seeing strictly for sex.



If a man came to my door to pick me up for our date, and my children were present, I would introduce them, before we left. _Sweeties, meet an acquaintance of Mom's. _ They would know the difference between an acquaintance and a friend, by then.

_Within my control,_ those sweeties would never, ever, see an acquaintance or a friend spend the night.


----------



## AyeCantSeeYou

If someone would hide the fact that they have kids from someone they are dating, I'd be worried about what else they'd be hiding.


----------



## earlycuyler

AyeCantSeeYou said:


> If someone would hide the fact that they have kids from someone they are dating, I'd be worried about what else they'd be hiding.



True dat, but how about inviting your "date" to a place you are at with your child or children, and letting them interact and conversate and all that.


----------



## BDBoop

Not the question. He knows they have children, he just doesn't want to meet them if it's not a serious relationship.


----------



## earlycuyler

BDBoop said:


> Not the question. He knows they have children, he just doesn't want to meet them if it's not a serious relationship.



I'm also of the opinion that its inappropriate.


----------



## Esmeralda

AquaAthena said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> JohnL.Burke said:
> 
> 
> 
> LOL! No, luckily for me he made a very unattractive woman. We just wrote each other a couple of times on the dating site. Nothing remotely untoward. How is the weather where you live kind of stuff. I just thought it was weird that  "adventurous" was code for transvestite. Is this common knowledge? I guess it is.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Thats out of the norm, usually transvestites keep to themselves.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> *
> Not all transgenders do, though.*
> 
> Transgender mayor selling shoes from own closet to boost Oregon city's budget - NY Daily News
> 
> The first openly transgender mayor in the nation is selling a pair of history - his shoe collection - to raise money for the city of Silverton, Ore.
> 
> Stu Rasmussen has a passion for shoes and a hell of a closet full of them, including a pair of floral-patterned snakeskin stilettos that are available on eBay for $10,000.
> 
> Silverton, a city with a population of nearly 9,200, has a healthy budget of about $22.5 million and $5.8 million for the general fund, according to Silverton city manager Bill Willoughby.
Click to expand...


Wow, that's interesting. I'm from Oregon.  Silverton is a small town.  It used to be extremely conservative.  Interesting.


----------



## High_Gravity

BDBoop said:


> Not the question. He knows they have children, he just doesn't want to meet them if it's not a serious relationship.



Yeah if its not serious don't introduce the kids, so many people make that mistake smh.


----------



## AyeCantSeeYou

Whatever the situation, the kids should be put first and not sidelined because mommy or daddy wants to go out and get laid. That's the problem with many people - single or not - the kids are last. People need to grow up and realize the world doesn't revolve around them. 

As far as the question goes, if the person doesn't feel comfortable having his/her kids meeting the other, then someone needs to rethink their priorities. Obviously, something isn't right.


----------



## BDBoop

High_Gravity said:


> BDBoop said:
> 
> 
> 
> Not the question. He knows they have children, he just doesn't want to meet them if it's not a serious relationship.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Yeah if its not serious don't introduce the kids, so many people make that mistake smh.
Click to expand...


You ever have a woman bringing the kids into the picture before you thought it was a good idea, HG?


----------



## Esmeralda

earlycuyler said:


> AyeCantSeeYou said:
> 
> 
> 
> If someone would hide the fact that they have kids from someone they are dating, I'd be worried about what else they'd be hiding.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> True dat, but how about inviting your "date" to a place you are at with your child or children, and letting them interact and conversate and all that.
Click to expand...


You wait until it is a serious, monogamous, ongoing relationship.  Something that seems to have a future.  You don't want your kids getting attached to someone who is suddenly going to disappear.  Having men in and out of your kids' lives is not good for the kids at all. Having casual sex in your home when you have kids is a really bad idea.


----------



## AquaAthena

Esmeralda said:


> AquaAthena said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Thats out of the norm, usually transvestites keep to themselves.
> 
> 
> 
> *
> Not all transgenders do, though.*
> 
> Transgender mayor selling shoes from own closet to boost Oregon city's budget - NY Daily News
> 
> The first openly transgender mayor in the nation is selling a pair of history - his shoe collection - to raise money for the city of Silverton, Ore.
> 
> Stu Rasmussen has a passion for shoes and a hell of a closet full of them, including a pair of floral-patterned snakeskin stilettos that are available on eBay for $10,000.
> 
> Silverton, a city with a population of nearly 9,200, has a healthy budget of about $22.5 million and $5.8 million for the general fund, according to Silverton city manager Bill Willoughby.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Wow, that's interesting. I'm from Oregon.  Silverton is a small town.  It used to be extremely conservative.  Interesting.
Click to expand...


And still a wealthy place, too.


----------



## High_Gravity

BDBoop said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> BDBoop said:
> 
> 
> 
> Not the question. He knows they have children, he just doesn't want to meet them if it's not a serious relationship.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Yeah if its not serious don't introduce the kids, so many people make that mistake smh.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> You ever have a woman bringing the kids into the picture before you thought it was a good idea, HG?
Click to expand...


Yes I have, its pretty awkward. If we're just sleeping together and its not a real relationship, why should I meet the kids?


----------



## Samson

High_Gravity said:


> BDBoop said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Yeah if its not serious don't introduce the kids, so many people make that mistake smh.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> You ever have a woman bringing the kids into the picture before you thought it was a good idea, HG?
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Yes I have, its pretty awkward. If we're just sleeping together and its not a real relationship, why should I meet the kids?
Click to expand...


Would it help if the kids are her daughters, and they're over 18 years old?


----------



## Samson

BDBoop said:


> Samson said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> BDBoop said:
> 
> 
> 
> I'm an introvert. My solitude is very important to me, probably comparable to water for the rest of humanity. I am a confirmed bachelor with a 13-year marriage in my past.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> So your a girl that won't spend the night.
> 
> 
> 
> You've met all my criteria.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I knew that someday, 'breathing' would earn me points!!!
Click to expand...


Don't feel bad; Many women undervalue having a pulse.


----------



## High_Gravity

Samson said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> BDBoop said:
> 
> 
> 
> You ever have a woman bringing the kids into the picture before you thought it was a good idea, HG?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Yes I have, its pretty awkward. If we're just sleeping together and its not a real relationship, why should I meet the kids?
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Would it help if the kids are her daughters, and they're over 18 years old?
Click to expand...


LOL well thats different.


----------



## Statistikhengst

High_Gravity said:


> Samson said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Yes I have, its pretty awkward. If we're just sleeping together and its not a real relationship, why should I meet the kids?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Would it help if the kids are her daughters, and they're over 18 years old?
> 
> 
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> LOL well thats different.
Click to expand...



Oh, my...


----------



## Disir

I read the question regarding the women allowing their children to meet the guys that they are dating. My question is are you guys telling these chics straight out that you are only in it for the sex?


----------



## BDBoop

Disir said:


> I read the question regarding the women allowing their children to meet the guys that they are dating. My question is are you guys telling these chics straight out that you are only in it for the sex?



Disir, there is much, MUCH ground between getting laid, and not wanting to meet the kids because it is quite some time before you know if a relationship is going anywhere.


----------



## Statistikhengst

Disir said:


> I read the question regarding the women allowing their children to meet the guys that they are dating. My question is are you guys telling these chics straight out that you are only in it for the sex?



Sometimes a date is just a date and nothing more. And sex is not even part of the equation. Just getting to know a woman and hear about her life, to sense how she "ticks", just to enjoy some time together. Just to laugh and enjoy a nice evening.


----------



## earlycuyler

Disir said:


> I read the question regarding the women allowing their children to meet the guys that they are dating. My question is are you guys telling these chics straight out that you are only in it for the sex?



I cant speak for others only myself. Im out of an 18 year marriage where both parties committed atrocities, and that I am a mess. That I recognize that I have a shifty attitude, and plan on keeping it for awhile. That I will likely Bing drink, and basically not be modifying any of my behaviors in the foreseeable future for any member or the opposite sex. So yeah,  sex and eating is about it. Sounds shitty, but like I said I won't change for anyone just now. Meeting the kiddies won't do much but make it a bit more quiet.


----------



## earlycuyler

Statistikhengst said:


> Disir said:
> 
> 
> 
> I read the question regarding the women allowing their children to meet the guys that they are dating. My question is are you guys telling these chics straight out that you are only in it for the sex?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Sometimes a date is just a date and nothing more. And sex is not even part of the equation. Just getting to know a woman and hear about her life, to sense how she "ticks", just to enjoy some time together. Just to laugh and enjoy a nice evening.
Click to expand...


At this point, sex is better then jacking off. The rest is just the process that leads to not having to spank it. Oh, just so we are clear, its NOT supposed to burn when you pee right ?


----------



## earlycuyler

BDBoop said:


> Disir said:
> 
> 
> 
> I read the question regarding the women allowing their children to meet the guys that they are dating. My question is are you guys telling these chics straight out that you are only in it for the sex?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Disir, there is much, MUCH ground between getting laid, and not wanting to meet the kids because it is quite some time before you know if a relationship is going anywhere.
Click to expand...


Then there is the kids. Kids get attached.  They don't understand this shit. Sure, they are sharper then they get credit for. No better judge of character then a 5 year old, but they have kid expectations of adults. Hit it and get it is beyond them as it should be.


----------



## High_Gravity

earlycuyler said:


> Disir said:
> 
> 
> 
> I read the question regarding the women allowing their children to meet the guys that they are dating. My question is are you guys telling these chics straight out that you are only in it for the sex?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I cant speak for others only myself. Im out of an 18 year marriage where both parties committed atrocities, and that I am a mess. That I recognize that I have a shifty attitude, and plan on keeping it for awhile. That I will likely Bing drink, and basically not be modifying any of my behaviors in the foreseeable future for any member or the opposite sex. So yeah,  sex and eating is about it. Sounds shitty, but like I said I won't change for anyone just now. Meeting the kiddies won't do much but make it a bit more quiet.
Click to expand...


I love your honesty


----------



## earlycuyler

High_Gravity said:


> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Disir said:
> 
> 
> 
> I read the question regarding the women allowing their children to meet the guys that they are dating. My question is are you guys telling these chics straight out that you are only in it for the sex?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I cant speak for others only myself. Im out of an 18 year marriage where both parties committed atrocities, and that I am a mess. That I recognize that I have a shifty attitude, and plan on keeping it for awhile. That I will likely Bing drink, and basically not be modifying any of my behaviors in the foreseeable future for any member or the opposite sex. So yeah,  sex and eating is about it. Sounds shitty, but like I said I won't change for anyone just now. Meeting the kiddies won't do much but make it a bit more quiet.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I love your honesty
Click to expand...


You are one of few. Those close to me are finding it hard to take.


----------



## High_Gravity

earlycuyler said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> I cant speak for others only myself. Im out of an 18 year marriage where both parties committed atrocities, and that I am a mess. That I recognize that I have a shifty attitude, and plan on keeping it for awhile. That I will likely Bing drink, and basically not be modifying any of my behaviors in the foreseeable future for any member or the opposite sex. So yeah,  sex and eating is about it. Sounds shitty, but like I said I won't change for anyone just now. Meeting the kiddies won't do much but make it a bit more quiet.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I love your honesty
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> You are one of few. Those close to me are finding it hard to take.
Click to expand...


I understand a little bit about what your going through, I got out a 5 year relationship myself about 18 months ago that ended terribly so I feel your pain.


----------



## earlycuyler

High_Gravity said:


> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> I love your honesty
> 
> 
> 
> 
> You are one of few. Those close to me are finding it hard to take.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I understand a little bit about what your going through, I got out a 5 year relationship myself about 18 months ago that ended terribly so I feel your pain.
Click to expand...


I wonder if its really pain ? I dont know. I know it starts fun until you start putting your cloths back on. And even now, Im going to a beer fest with this woman on the 9th in sugarland. I made it quit clear that it would be best that I don't hang with the kids anymore.  Not ready for it, don't want it, won't do it. Odd thing is, she said okay. Whats for dinner ?


----------



## earlycuyler

Oh, im off the wagon again, lol. Clowney Daggers.


----------



## High_Gravity

earlycuyler said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> You are one of few. Those close to me are finding it hard to take.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I understand a little bit about what your going through, I got out a 5 year relationship myself about 18 months ago that ended terribly so I feel your pain.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I wonder if its really pain ? I dont know. I know it starts fun until you start putting your cloths back on. And even now, Im going to a beer fest with this woman on the 9th in sugarland. I made it quit clear that it would be best that I don't hang with the kids anymore.  Not ready for it, don't want it, won't do it. Odd thing is, she said okay. Whats for dinner ?
Click to expand...


If you are blunt and honest with women sometimes they respond to it, its quite a science.


----------



## earlycuyler

High_Gravity said:


> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> I understand a little bit about what your going through, I got out a 5 year relationship myself about 18 months ago that ended terribly so I feel your pain.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I wonder if its really pain ? I dont know. I know it starts fun until you start putting your cloths back on. And even now, Im going to a beer fest with this woman on the 9th in sugarland. I made it quit clear that it would be best that I don't hang with the kids anymore.  Not ready for it, don't want it, won't do it. Odd thing is, she said okay. Whats for dinner ?
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> If you are blunt and honest with women sometimes they respond to it, its quite a science.
Click to expand...


It is. And thers did not seem to be butt hurt over it either.  By the way, dinner will be sushi in Kemah. My Boy is DD.


----------



## High_Gravity

earlycuyler said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> I wonder if its really pain ? I dont know. I know it starts fun until you start putting your cloths back on. And even now, Im going to a beer fest with this woman on the 9th in sugarland. I made it quit clear that it would be best that I don't hang with the kids anymore.  Not ready for it, don't want it, won't do it. Odd thing is, she said okay. Whats for dinner ?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> If you are blunt and honest with women sometimes they respond to it, its quite a science.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> It is. And thers did not seem to be butt hurt over it either.  By the way, dinner will be sushi in Kemah. My Boy is DD.
Click to expand...


I like your style, too bad we don't live in the same city we could hang and talk trash to chicks lol.


----------



## AquaAthena

High_Gravity said:


> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> I understand a little bit about what your going through, I got out a 5 year relationship myself about 18 months ago that ended terribly so I feel your pain.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I wonder if its really pain ? I dont know. I know it starts fun until you start putting your cloths back on. And even now, Im going to a beer fest with this woman on the 9th in sugarland. I made it quit clear that it would be best that I don't hang with the kids anymore.  Not ready for it, don't want it, won't do it. Odd thing is, she said okay. Whats for dinner ?
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> If you are blunt and honest with women sometimes they respond to it, its quite a science.
Click to expand...



That's true. Some of us respect men who are upfront with us, and he scores points for being honest.  This way everybody knows sooner than later, what the truth is. The truth, combined with humor, are powerful aphrodisiacs.


----------



## earlycuyler

High_Gravity said:


> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> If you are blunt and honest with women sometimes they respond to it, its quite a science.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> It is. And thers did not seem to be butt hurt over it either.  By the way, dinner will be sushi in Kemah. My Boy is DD.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I like your style, too bad we don't live in the same city we could hang and talk trash to chicks lol.
Click to expand...


Oh he'll yeah. Talk about a belligerent drunk. Seriously, look at my profile pic. Since the separation their has been an ex cop who worked Galveston county and knew me when I was on probation, a school teacher , a realtor,  and a vet tech and a nurse. RN I think. what these women who have it together see in a train wreck who only wNts sex I have no clue.  Im the dude I told my daughter to stay away from. Sheesh. One year and im outta here.  May do florida for a bit.


----------



## earlycuyler

AquaAthena said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> I wonder if its really pain ? I dont know. I know it starts fun until you start putting your cloths back on. And even now, Im going to a beer fest with this woman on the 9th in sugarland. I made it quit clear that it would be best that I don't hang with the kids anymore.  Not ready for it, don't want it, won't do it. Odd thing is, she said okay. Whats for dinner ?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> If you are blunt and honest with women sometimes they respond to it, its quite a science.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> 
> That's true. Some of us respect men who are upfront with us, and he scores points for being honest.  This way everybody knows sooner than later, what the truth is. The truth, combined with humor, are powerful aphrodisiacs.
Click to expand...


Hm. I think sometimes the truth gets mixed up in the humor. This is no bueno. My favorite line is, "do you believe in the here after ? Then you know what im here after". There it is.


----------



## Disir

BDBoop said:


> Disir said:
> 
> 
> 
> I read the question regarding the women allowing their children to meet the guys that they are dating. My question is are you guys telling these chics straight out that you are only in it for the sex?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Disir, there is much, MUCH ground between getting laid, and not wanting to meet the kids because it is quite some time before you know if a relationship is going anywhere.
Click to expand...


I know. 

I also think that people have a tendency to spend a lot of prep time trying to disguise themselves on dates.  A lot of the problems that people encounter down the road could have been resolved had people been straight up from the get go.  

So, while it is very easy to criticize women that allow their dates to meet their children, I have to ask is there something that is not being said from the get go that would allow a woman to even go there.  

One of the things that I learned real quick (and felt less guilty about) whilst internet dating is that most of us have escape plans.  We spend an agonizing amount of time trying to be polite not to let the other person know that we have an escape plan upon the first meeting because we don't want to hurt the other person's feelings.   But, we have them anyway.  

I keep a list of red flags (everybody does or probably should).  I went on a date with a guy that had recently ended a 9 year relationship with a woman that he stayed with because.  They didn't have much in common and they would have tremendous fights once things boiled over. He didn't really care for her but admittedly stayed with her because she was available.  

It's insane. Yet, people do this all the time.  They aren't straight up and then problems develop or they are unhappy but wait until someone really will get hurt before they shoot straight.


----------



## Disir

earlycuyler said:


> Disir said:
> 
> 
> 
> I read the question regarding the women allowing their children to meet the guys that they are dating. My question is are you guys telling these chics straight out that you are only in it for the sex?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I cant speak for others only myself. Im out of an 18 year marriage where both parties committed atrocities, and that I am a mess. That I recognize that I have a shifty attitude, and plan on keeping it for awhile. That I will likely Bing drink, and basically not be modifying any of my behaviors in the foreseeable future for any member or the opposite sex. So yeah,  sex and eating is about it. Sounds shitty, but like I said I won't change for anyone just now. Meeting the kiddies won't do much but make it a bit more quiet.
Click to expand...


Sounds honest.


----------



## earlycuyler

Disir said:


> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Disir said:
> 
> 
> 
> I read the question regarding the women allowing their children to meet the guys that they are dating. My question is are you guys telling these chics straight out that you are only in it for the sex?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I cant speak for others only myself. Im out of an 18 year marriage where both parties committed atrocities, and that I am a mess. That I recognize that I have a shifty attitude, and plan on keeping it for awhile. That I will likely Bing drink, and basically not be modifying any of my behaviors in the foreseeable future for any member or the opposite sex. So yeah,  sex and eating is about it. Sounds shitty, but like I said I won't change for anyone just now. Meeting the kiddies won't do much but make it a bit more quiet.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Sounds honest.
Click to expand...


I try to be. Im not a healthy person. Im still messed up from all of it. Behaviour aside, the least  anyone can do is be straight about it. Im only intrested in sex most of the time. Sometimes I want other things. But I dont want to meet kids ever. At least not for now.


----------



## High_Gravity

AquaAthena said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> I wonder if its really pain ? I dont know. I know it starts fun until you start putting your cloths back on. And even now, Im going to a beer fest with this woman on the 9th in sugarland. I made it quit clear that it would be best that I don't hang with the kids anymore.  Not ready for it, don't want it, won't do it. Odd thing is, she said okay. Whats for dinner ?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> If you are blunt and honest with women sometimes they respond to it, its quite a science.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> 
> That's true. Some of us respect men who are upfront with us, and he scores points for being honest.  This way everybody knows sooner than later, what the truth is. The truth, combined with humor, are powerful aphrodisiacs.
Click to expand...


There you go.


----------



## High_Gravity

earlycuyler said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> It is. And thers did not seem to be butt hurt over it either.  By the way, dinner will be sushi in Kemah. My Boy is DD.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I like your style, too bad we don't live in the same city we could hang and talk trash to chicks lol.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Oh he'll yeah. Talk about a belligerent drunk. Seriously, look at my profile pic. Since the separation their has been an ex cop who worked Galveston county and knew me when I was on probation, a school teacher , a realtor,  and a vet tech and a nurse. RN I think. what these women who have it together see in a train wreck who only wNts sex I have no clue.  Im the dude I told my daughter to stay away from. Sheesh. One year and im outta here.  May do florida for a bit.
Click to expand...


Women love them some bad boys bro, you'll get the nod over a prince charming every time.


----------



## Disir

earlycuyler said:


> Disir said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> I cant speak for others only myself. Im out of an 18 year marriage where both parties committed atrocities, and that I am a mess. That I recognize that I have a shifty attitude, and plan on keeping it for awhile. That I will likely Bing drink, and basically not be modifying any of my behaviors in the foreseeable future for any member or the opposite sex. So yeah,  sex and eating is about it. Sounds shitty, but like I said I won't change for anyone just now. Meeting the kiddies won't do much but make it a bit more quiet.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Sounds honest.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I try to be. Im not a healthy person. Im still messed up from all of it. Behaviour aside, the least  anyone can do is be straight about it. Im only intrested in sex most of the time. Sometimes I want other things. But I dont want to meet kids ever. At least not for now.
Click to expand...


I'd like to see the number of people that are healthy after a divorce. I have heard of amicable divorces. I have never seen one irl.  I don't date men on the rebound and I am wary of meeting men with kids- if they have physical custody.


----------



## WelfareQueen

Women like the honest, friendly approach, without treating them like a piece of meat.  Bad boys....I guess, but they're different kinds of bad boys.   

I also scouted out potential dates for someone I would genuinely want to hang out with.  I let the woman know that. _* I like you....you know...as an actual person. *_ If sex happens...that's a bonus.  But hopefully, I've made a friend.  

Guys need to relax.  Too much pressure focused solely on the pussy.  I've had sex with some bitches.  Friendly fun sex is a lot better imho.


----------



## Statistikhengst

earlycuyler said:


> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Disir said:
> 
> 
> 
> I read the question regarding the women allowing their children to meet the guys that they are dating. My question is are you guys telling these chics straight out that you are only in it for the sex?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Sometimes a date is just a date and nothing more. And sex is not even part of the equation. Just getting to know a woman and hear about her life, to sense how she "ticks", just to enjoy some time together. Just to laugh and enjoy a nice evening.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> At this point, sex is better then jacking off. The rest is just the process that leads to not having to spank it. Oh, just so we are clear, its NOT supposed to burn when you pee right ?
Click to expand...



No: burn = BAD, go see doc.


----------



## pacer

Disir said:


> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Disir said:
> 
> 
> 
> Sounds honest.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I try to be. Im not a healthy person. Im still messed up from all of it. Behaviour aside, the least  anyone can do is be straight about it. Im only intrested in sex most of the time. Sometimes I want other things. But I dont want to meet kids ever. At least not for now.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I'd like to see the number of people that are healthy after a divorce. I have heard of amicable divorces. I have never seen one irl.  I don't date men on the rebound and I am wary of meeting men with kids- if they have physical custody.
Click to expand...

Some divorces are 'ugly' because neither party wants to compromise but there are plenty of divorces that are settled amicably.  Some couples simply grow apart and agree to go their own way.  It takes a certain level of maturity to let go of the anger and work together toward finding a mutual compromise.


----------



## High_Gravity

WelfareQueen said:


> Women like the honest, friendly approach, without treating them like a piece of meat.  Bad boys....I guess, but they're different kinds of bad boys.
> 
> I also scouted out potential dates for someone I would genuinely want to hang out with.  I let the woman know that. _* I like you....you know...as an actual person. *_ If sex happens...that's a bonus.  But hopefully, I've made a friend.
> 
> *Guys need to relax.  Too much pressure focused solely on the pussy.*  I've had sex with some bitches.  Friendly fun sex is a lot better imho.



You just nailed it, thats 100% correct.


----------



## pacer

WelfareQueen said:


> Women like the honest, friendly approach, without treating them like a piece of meat.  Bad boys....I guess, but they're different kinds of bad boys.
> 
> I also scouted out potential dates for someone I would genuinely want to hang out with.  I let the woman know that. _* I like you....you know...as an actual person. *_ If sex happens...that's a bonus.  But hopefully, I've made a friend.
> 
> Guys need to relax.  Too much pressure focused solely on the pussy.  I've had sex with some bitches.  Friendly fun sex is a lot better imho.


I don't think it is possible to have casual sex devoid of emotional attachment and still just be friends?  Sex is the glue that bonds.  Once pussy is involved, you create a significant bond.  You put yourself in the role of boyfriend/girlfriend.


----------



## WelfareQueen

pacer said:


> WelfareQueen said:
> 
> 
> 
> Women like the honest, friendly approach, without treating them like a piece of meat.  Bad boys....I guess, but they're different kinds of bad boys.
> 
> I also scouted out potential dates for someone I would genuinely want to hang out with.  I let the woman know that. _* I like you....you know...as an actual person. *_ If sex happens...that's a bonus.  But hopefully, I've made a friend.
> 
> Guys need to relax.  Too much pressure focused solely on the pussy.  I've had sex with some bitches.  Friendly fun sex is a lot better imho.
> 
> 
> 
> I don't think it is possible to have casual sex devoid of emotional attachment and still just be friends?  Sex is the glue that bonds.  Once pussy is involved, you create a significant bond.  You put yourself in the role of boyfriend/girlfriend.
Click to expand...




I agree...particularly for women.  I had a booty call friend years ago.  It was casual for me....she claimed it was casual for her....but she started getting feelings and didn't tell me.  When things ended, it ended badly....and she blamed me.  

Had she told she had feelings it would have changed the whole equation.  She needed to be honest about what she was feeling and was not.


----------



## Disir

pacer said:


> Disir said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> I try to be. Im not a healthy person. Im still messed up from all of it. Behaviour aside, the least  anyone can do is be straight about it. Im only intrested in sex most of the time. Sometimes I want other things. But I dont want to meet kids ever. At least not for now.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I'd like to see the number of people that are healthy after a divorce. I have heard of amicable divorces. I have never seen one irl.  I don't date men on the rebound and I am wary of meeting men with kids- if they have physical custody.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> Some divorces are 'ugly' because neither party wants to compromise but there are plenty of divorces that are settled amicably.  Some couples simply grow apart and agree to go their own way.  It takes a certain level of maturity to let go of the anger and work together toward finding a mutual compromise.
Click to expand...


Bah! That's just a myth perpetuated to make the rest of us feel like shit. Inspiration or some such nonsense.  

Most of the time it is because the court doesn't care how you feel.  They only care about division of property and children are a separate issue.  So, it's real easy to feel burned all the way around.


----------



## Luddly Neddite

[MENTION=32620]earlycuyler[/MENTION]

This whole thread sounds sad and lonely. Not just earlycuyler. The whole tone of not liking the opposite sex.


----------



## High_Gravity

Luddly Neddite said:


> [MENTION=32620]earlycuyler[/MENTION]
> 
> This whole thread sounds sad and lonely. Not just earlycuyler. The whole tone of not liking the opposite sex.



Sometimes when your single you get lonely. Its part of the package.


----------



## earlycuyler

And many times its nice to just be alone.


----------



## BDBoop

High_Gravity said:


> Luddly Neddite said:
> 
> 
> 
> [MENTION=32620]earlycuyler[/MENTION]
> 
> This whole thread sounds sad and lonely. Not just earlycuyler. The whole tone of not liking the opposite sex.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Sometimes when your single you get lonely. Its part of the package.
Click to expand...


Frankly, I think it's just talk. I think if any of these guys hit it off with the one they'd been hoping for, they'd just be totally twitterpated.


----------



## earlycuyler

BDBoop said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Luddly Neddite said:
> 
> 
> 
> [MENTION=32620]earlycuyler[/MENTION]
> 
> This whole thread sounds sad and lonely. Not just earlycuyler. The whole tone of not liking the opposite sex.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Sometimes when your single you get lonely. Its part of the package.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Frankly, I think it's just talk. I think if any of these guys hit it off with the one they'd been hoping for, they'd just be totally twitterpated.
Click to expand...


I dont deny that at all. Just not out looking. And children should not be bring in on date two.


----------



## BDBoop

earlycuyler said:


> BDBoop said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Sometimes when your single you get lonely. Its part of the package.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Frankly, I think it's just talk. I think if any of these guys hit it off with the one they'd been hoping for, they'd just be totally twitterpated.
> 
> 
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I dont deny that at all. Just not out looking. And children should not be bring in on date two.
Click to expand...


I haven't seen you "bad mouthing" women, either. I was addressing what Luddy was seeing.


----------



## High_Gravity

earlycuyler said:


> BDBoop said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Sometimes when your single you get lonely. Its part of the package.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Frankly, I think it's just talk. I think if any of these guys hit it off with the one they'd been hoping for, they'd just be totally twitterpated.
> 
> 
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I dont deny that at all. Just not out looking. And children should not be bring in on date two.
Click to expand...


What wer seeing here bro is an implosion of single moms desperate for a father to their children. I hardly know any women my age without kids.


----------



## AyeCantSeeYou

High_Gravity said:


> What wer seeing here bro is an implosion of single moms desperate for a father to their children. I hardly know any women my age without kids.



Not ALL single moms are out looking, nor are all desperate for a father for their kids. The smart ones, which most men will never see, are busy raising their kids and staying out of the 'meat market' atmosphere that some also call dating.


----------



## BDBoop

AyeCantSeeYou said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> What wer seeing here bro is an implosion of single moms desperate for a father to their children. I hardly know any women my age without kids.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Not ALL single moms are out looking, nor are all desperate for a father for their kids. The smart ones, which most men will never see, are busy raising their kids and staying out of the 'meat market' atmosphere that some also call dating.
Click to expand...


Exactly. 

That's why I keep trying to shove the guys off to meetup.com, where you can socialize and make friends who share similar interests, and dare I say possibly meet a woman that's not out cruising for the next daddy.


----------



## High_Gravity

AyeCantSeeYou said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> What wer seeing here bro is an implosion of single moms desperate for a father to their children. I hardly know any women my age without kids.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Not ALL single moms are out looking, nor are all desperate for a father for their kids. The smart ones, which most men will never see, are busy raising their kids and staying out of the 'meat market' atmosphere that some also call dating.
Click to expand...


Oh I know not all of them are like that but so many are, especially the younger ones, their out there hunting.


----------



## AyeCantSeeYou

High_Gravity said:


> AyeCantSeeYou said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> What wer seeing here bro is an implosion of single moms desperate for a father to their children. I hardly know any women my age without kids.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Not ALL single moms are out looking, nor are all desperate for a father for their kids. The smart ones, which most men will never see, are busy raising their kids and staying out of the 'meat market' atmosphere that some also call dating.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Oh I know not all of them are like that but so many are, especially the younger ones, their out there hunting.
Click to expand...


I really hope you stay as far away from them as possible!


----------



## pacer

BDBoop said:


> AyeCantSeeYou said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> What wer seeing here bro is an implosion of single moms desperate for a father to their children. I hardly know any women my age without kids.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Not ALL single moms are out looking, nor are all desperate for a father for their kids. The smart ones, which most men will never see, are busy raising their kids and staying out of the 'meat market' atmosphere that some also call dating.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Exactly.
> 
> That's why I keep trying to shove the guys off to meetup.com, where you can socialize and make friends who share similar interests, and dare I say possibly meet a woman that's not out cruising for the next daddy.
Click to expand...

Unfortunately, most of the people who go to these meetups are lonely and vulnerable and oftentimes hook up for all the wrong reasons.  It is important to learn to live with oneself in order to develop the skills needed to be selective in social situations.


----------



## AquaAthena

High_Gravity said:


> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> BDBoop said:
> 
> 
> 
> Frankly, I think it's just talk. I think if any of these guys hit it off with the one they'd been hoping for, they'd just be totally twitterpated.
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N12dH1lIE74
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I dont deny that at all. Just not out looking. And children should not be bring in on date two.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> What wer seeing here bro is an implosion of single moms desperate for a father to their children. I hardly know any women my age without kids.
Click to expand...


Those would be the ones, who haven't read statistics on the failure of second or third marriages, which almost has the same percentages of divorce as the first marriage, only the difference is they have ended because of the step-children.  

Think many times before looking for a partner for the wrong reasons.


----------



## AyeCantSeeYou

Reminds me of an old song that went something like:

Looking for love in all the wrong places.....


----------



## pacer




----------



## pacer




----------



## High_Gravity

AyeCantSeeYou said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> AyeCantSeeYou said:
> 
> 
> 
> Not ALL single moms are out looking, nor are all desperate for a father for their kids. The smart ones, which most men will never see, are busy raising their kids and staying out of the 'meat market' atmosphere that some also call dating.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Oh I know not all of them are like that but so many are, especially the younger ones, their out there hunting.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I really hope you stay as far away from them as possible!
Click to expand...


Oh yeah believe me I have been there, my ex gf of 5 years had kids and it was a disaster at the end, you can't drag your kids through hell for a relationship, thats selfish and I see people do it everyday.


----------



## High_Gravity

AquaAthena said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> I dont deny that at all. Just not out looking. And children should not be bring in on date two.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> What wer seeing here bro is an implosion of single moms desperate for a father to their children. I hardly know any women my age without kids.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Those would be the ones, who haven't read statistics on the failure of second or third marriages, which almost has the same percentages of divorce as the first marriage, only the difference is they have ended because of the step-children.
> 
> Think many times before looking for a partner for the wrong reasons.
Click to expand...


What we are seeing here is the definition of insanity, they keep trying the same thing over with different men praying for a different result. Just because you meet a hot stranger at a bar with a big cock does not mean he should be the father of your kids.


----------



## Diana1180

Soo...I attempted a date this past Friday.  Have known this guy a few years.  We met at a party of a mutual friend, exchanged numbers and did the whole stupid FB friend thing.  We just never went on a date till a few weeks ago we went to lunch.  Had a great time and he asked me out again.

I had last Friday off so he asked if i wanted to spend the day together, meet for breakfast/brunch and go hiking or something.  Awesome.  SO I get there, we spend a few hours together and he gets a call.  From his ex-wife.  She just broke up with her bf of 3 yrs and "is beside herself".  Can he get their son from school.  Ok, thats fine, assuming our day will just end at 2 instead of later like planned.  Nope, I asked what time he had to go.  He said in like a half hour (which will be 1230) she needs someone to talk to.  And he GOES.  

I am a bit put out at this point but we exchange the pleasantries Friday night "Had a nice time..me too...etc"

Then nothing the rest of the weekend.  I assume he is busy wiht his son.  I didnt reach out.  Yes, I was still put off but I wasnt the one cutting the date short.  I kind of felt he wanted an out.  But me being the girl, texted him Tuesday night.  And he was mad at ME for not texting all weekend. "What? NOW your talkign to me?  What did I do that was so bad.  I guess I wasnt what you wanted"

Uh, what?  I asked him if he had one of those special phones that only takes incoming texts/calls.   And told him to put himself in my shoes before he decided to be mad at me.  No response.  Crickets lol.

The weekend before that...my date was horrible to.  

I am starting to think I am the common denominator in all this mess lol.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> Soo...I attempted a date this past Friday.  Have known this guy a few years.  We met at a party of a mutual friend, exchanged numbers and did the whole stupid FB friend thing.  We just never went on a date till a few weeks ago we went to lunch.  Had a great time and he asked me out again.
> 
> I had last Friday off so he asked if i wanted to spend the day together, meet for breakfast/brunch and go hiking or something.  Awesome.  SO I get there, we spend a few hours together and he gets a call.  From his ex-wife.  She just broke up with her bf of 3 yrs and "is beside herself".  Can he get their son from school.  Ok, thats fine, assuming our day will just end at 2 instead of later like planned.  Nope, I asked what time he had to go.  He said in like a half hour (which will be 1230) she needs someone to talk to.  And he GOES.
> 
> I am a bit put out at this point but we exchange the pleasantries Friday night "Had a nice time..me too...etc"
> 
> Then nothing the rest of the weekend.  I assume he is busy wiht his son.  I didnt reach out.  Yes, I was still put off but I wasnt the one cutting the date short.  I kind of felt he wanted an out.  But me being the girl, texted him Tuesday night.  And he was mad at ME for not texting all weekend. "What? NOW your talkign to me?  What did I do that was so bad.  I guess I wasnt what you wanted"
> 
> Uh, what?  I asked him if he had one of those special phones that only takes incoming texts/calls.   And told him to put himself in my shoes before he decided to be mad at me.  No response.  Crickets lol.
> 
> The weekend before that...my date was horrible to.
> 
> I am starting to think I am the common denominator in all this mess lol.



I can tell you this the older we get the more baggage people have with kids, exes etc etc I can tell you that being single and dating now is NOTHING like it was when I was in my early 20s and teen years, back than we just talked about the possibilities and the future in front of us. Now its about kids, the ex, the job etc etc etc its not you thats the problem, its that everyone has alot more baggage and walls to sort through now.


----------



## Diana1180

High_Gravity said:


> I can tell you this the older we get the more baggage people have with kids, exes etc etc I can tell you that being single and dating now is NOTHING like it was when I was in my early 20s and teen years, back than we just talked about the possibilities and the future in front of us. Now its about kids, the ex, the job etc etc etc its not you thats the problem, its that everyone has alot more baggage and walls to sort through now.



I know about baggage.  I have been married and have a child.

But would you leave a date to go comfort your ex wife?  A date you set up and planned.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> I can tell you this the older we get the more baggage people have with kids, exes etc etc I can tell you that being single and dating now is NOTHING like it was when I was in my early 20s and teen years, back than we just talked about the possibilities and the future in front of us. Now its about kids, the ex, the job etc etc etc its not you thats the problem, its that everyone has alot more baggage and walls to sort through now.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I know about baggage.  I have been married and have a child.
> 
> But would you leave a date to go comfort your ex wife?  A date you set up and planned.
Click to expand...


I wouldnt but my relationship with my ex wife is very different, we are friends now but it took years to get here but I would not leave a night out for her. I would only do that if I had feelings for the person or if it was a kid issue if we had one.


----------



## pacer

Diana1180 said:


> But would you leave a date to go comfort your ex wife?  A date you set up and planned.


That should be a major flag.


----------



## earlycuyler

Diana1180 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> I can tell you this the older we get the more baggage people have with kids, exes etc etc I can tell you that being single and dating now is NOTHING like it was when I was in my early 20s and teen years, back than we just talked about the possibilities and the future in front of us. Now its about kids, the ex, the job etc etc etc its not you thats the problem, its that everyone has alot more baggage and walls to sort through now.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I know about baggage.  I have been married and have a child.
> 
> But would you leave a date to go comfort your ex wife?  A date you set up and planned.
Click to expand...


Heeeellll no. Not ever.


----------



## WelfareQueen

Diana1180 said:


> Soo...I attempted a date this past Friday.  Have known this guy a few years.  We met at a party of a mutual friend, exchanged numbers and did the whole stupid FB friend thing.  We just never went on a date till a few weeks ago we went to lunch.  Had a great time and he asked me out again.
> 
> I had last Friday off so he asked if i wanted to spend the day together, meet for breakfast/brunch and go hiking or something.  Awesome.  SO I get there, we spend a few hours together and he gets a call.  From his ex-wife.  She just broke up with her bf of 3 yrs and "is beside herself".  Can he get their son from school.  Ok, thats fine, assuming our day will just end at 2 instead of later like planned.  Nope, I asked what time he had to go.  He said in like a half hour (which will be 1230) she needs someone to talk to.  And he GOES.
> 
> I am a bit put out at this point but we exchange the pleasantries Friday night "Had a nice time..me too...etc"
> 
> 
> Then nothing the rest of the weekend.  I assume he is busy wiht his son.  I didnt reach out.  Yes, I was still put off but I wasnt the one cutting the date short.  I kind of felt he wanted an out.  But me being the girl, texted him Tuesday night.  And he was mad at ME for not texting all weekend. "What? NOW your talkign to me?  What did I do that was so bad.  I guess I wasnt what you wanted"
> 
> Uh, what?  I asked him if he had one of those special phones that only takes incoming texts/calls.   And told him to put himself in my shoes before he decided to be mad at me.  No response.  Crickets lol.
> 
> The weekend before that...my date was horrible to.
> 
> I am starting to think I am the common denominator in all this mess lol.





It's not you at all.  HG is a smart guy.  His post is right on the money.  This guy still has feelings for the ex.  He needs to work through some shit.  You can do better.


----------



## Diana1180

Thank you.  I started feeling like I was the one who needed to apologize lol.

I sent my response back and he hasnt responded so I am thinking it was his way of taking the out.

Which confuses the shit out of me because HE asked for the date inthe first place after we had lunch.

Single is so much easier.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> Thank you.  I started feeling like I was the one who needed to apologize lol.
> 
> I sent my response back and he hasnt responded so I am thinking it was his way of taking the out.
> 
> Which confuses the shit out of me because HE asked for the date inthe first place after we had lunch.
> 
> Single is so much easier.



Well another thing I should mention is, usually when you go out with someone and don't hear from them, it usually means their not interested so he probably got a little butt hurt. I went out with a girl my co workers set me up with a few months ago, I thought the date went amazing but afterwards I text her and said I had a good time and she took hours to respond, so I knew that was a red flag. Its easy to get upset in these situations, he probably liked you but has unresolved issues with the ex, its probably good you saw all of this on the first date before you really invested I would count yourself lucky.


----------



## High_Gravity

He probably knows your about to cut him loose and wants to spare himself the hurt from that.


----------



## Diana1180

But the thing is Friday night when he texted me telling me he had a good time I responded right away that I did also.  I also made some stupid comment on one of his FB posts ( I sound liek I am in high school) so he knows I wasnt ignoring him.

Saturday ...nothing...sunday..nothing.  But he also had his son all weekend so I thought he was busy with him.  I am not one to constantly text all day and bug the person.

After he got mad at me I told him my side and told him to put himself in my shoes before he got too mad.  He didnt respond.  Then said he would respond later "when he had a clear head"  That was Wednseday.

Chalk it up to a learning experience.

Too bad too because he had seemed like a nice guy lol.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> But the thing is Friday night when he texted me telling me he had a good time I responded right away that I did also.  I also made some stupid comment on one of his FB posts ( I sound liek I am in high school) so he knows I wasnt ignoring him.
> 
> Saturday ...nothing...sunday..nothing.  But he also had his son all weekend so I thought he was busy with him.  I am not one to constantly text all day and bug the person.
> 
> After he got mad at me I told him my side and told him to put himself in my shoes before he got too mad.  He didnt respond.  Then said he would respond later "when he had a clear head"  That was Wednseday.
> 
> Chalk it up to a learning experience.



Its a very fine line, this all depends on the person, if you text too soon some people think your too clingy, if you wait too long people assume your not interested, sometimes you can't win. Dating is a loaded mine field, sometimes a small miscommunication can derail things before you even get started but thats life I guess, I've been single 2 years and I have dated alot and had some one night stands but nothing serious, I get derailed before a serious relationship can even start, I don't think I am meant for one, and I cannot keep the married women away from me. 3 of the women I have hooked up with in the past few years have been married.


----------



## Diana1180

High_Gravity said:


> Its a very fine line, this all depends on the person, if you text too soon some people think your too clingy, if you wait too long people assume your not interested, sometimes you can't win. Dating is a loaded mine field, sometimes a small miscommunication can derail things before you even get started but thats life I guess, I've been single 2 years and I have dated alot and had some one night stands but nothing serious, I get derailed before a serious relationship can even start, I don't think I am meant for one, and I cannot keep the married women away from me. 3 of the women I have hooked up with in the past few years have been married.



So true..very fine line.

Dont get me started on the married men lol


----------



## AyeCantSeeYou

Diana1180 said:


> But the thing is Friday night when he texted me telling me he had a good time I responded right away that I did also.  I also made some stupid comment on one of his FB posts ( I sound liek I am in high school) so he knows I wasnt ignoring him.
> 
> Saturday ...nothing...sunday..nothing.  But he also had his son all weekend so I thought he was busy with him.  I am not one to constantly text all day and bug the person.
> 
> After he got mad at me I told him my side and told him to put himself in my shoes before he got too mad.  He didnt respond.  Then said he would respond later "when he had a clear head"  That was Wednseday.
> 
> Chalk it up to a learning experience.
> 
> Too bad too because he had seemed like a nice guy lol.



Far too many red flags with this whole story. 

I would have never planned on spending an entire day with someone on a first date to begin with. An hour and a half tops - enough time for dinner somewhere and a little talking. Leave him wanting to know more about you.


----------



## Diana1180

AyeCantSeeYou said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> But the thing is Friday night when he texted me telling me he had a good time I responded right away that I did also.  I also made some stupid comment on one of his FB posts ( I sound liek I am in high school) so he knows I wasnt ignoring him.
> 
> Saturday ...nothing...sunday..nothing.  But he also had his son all weekend so I thought he was busy with him.  I am not one to constantly text all day and bug the person.
> 
> After he got mad at me I told him my side and told him to put himself in my shoes before he got too mad.  He didnt respond.  Then said he would respond later "when he had a clear head"  That was Wednseday.
> 
> Chalk it up to a learning experience.
> 
> Too bad too because he had seemed like a nice guy lol.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Far too many red flags with this whole story.
> 
> I would have never planned on spending an entire day with someone on a first date to begin with. An hour and a half tops - enough time for dinner somewhere and a little talking. Leave him wanting to know more about you.
Click to expand...


We had lunch a few weeks prior.  But have "known" each other for a few years.  We have the same social circle.


----------



## earlycuyler

AyeCantSeeYou said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> But the thing is Friday night when he texted me telling me he had a good time I responded right away that I did also.  I also made some stupid comment on one of his FB posts ( I sound liek I am in high school) so he knows I wasnt ignoring him.
> 
> Saturday ...nothing...sunday..nothing.  But he also had his son all weekend so I thought he was busy with him.  I am not one to constantly text all day and bug the person.
> 
> After he got mad at me I told him my side and told him to put himself in my shoes before he got too mad.  He didnt respond.  Then said he would respond later "when he had a clear head"  That was Wednseday.
> 
> Chalk it up to a learning experience.
> 
> Too bad too because he had seemed like a nice guy lol.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Far too many red flags with this whole story.
> 
> I would have never planned on spending an entire day with someone on a first date to begin with. An hour and a half tops - enough time for dinner somewhere and a little talking. Leave him wanting to know more about you.
Click to expand...


First two are dinner and or a movie.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> AyeCantSeeYou said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> But the thing is Friday night when he texted me telling me he had a good time I responded right away that I did also.  I also made some stupid comment on one of his FB posts ( I sound liek I am in high school) so he knows I wasnt ignoring him.
> 
> Saturday ...nothing...sunday..nothing.  But he also had his son all weekend so I thought he was busy with him.  I am not one to constantly text all day and bug the person.
> 
> After he got mad at me I told him my side and told him to put himself in my shoes before he got too mad.  He didnt respond.  Then said he would respond later "when he had a clear head"  That was Wednseday.
> 
> Chalk it up to a learning experience.
> 
> Too bad too because he had seemed like a nice guy lol.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Far too many red flags with this whole story.
> 
> I would have never planned on spending an entire day with someone on a first date to begin with. An hour and a half tops - enough time for dinner somewhere and a little talking. Leave him wanting to know more about you.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> We had lunch a few weeks prior.  But have "known" each other for a few years.  We have the same social circle.
Click to expand...


Yeah dating someone you have known for years sounds good in theory but than you start to see things you never seen before like the issue with his ex wife, if your just friends with someone you don't see all the baggage you would see if you were trying to date them, very different dynamics.


----------



## Diana1180

Noted for next time.

His idea so I went with it.


----------



## High_Gravity

earlycuyler said:


> AyeCantSeeYou said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> But the thing is Friday night when he texted me telling me he had a good time I responded right away that I did also.  I also made some stupid comment on one of his FB posts ( I sound liek I am in high school) so he knows I wasnt ignoring him.
> 
> Saturday ...nothing...sunday..nothing.  But he also had his son all weekend so I thought he was busy with him.  I am not one to constantly text all day and bug the person.
> 
> After he got mad at me I told him my side and told him to put himself in my shoes before he got too mad.  He didnt respond.  Then said he would respond later "when he had a clear head"  That was Wednseday.
> 
> Chalk it up to a learning experience.
> 
> Too bad too because he had seemed like a nice guy lol.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Far too many red flags with this whole story.
> 
> I would have never planned on spending an entire day with someone on a first date to begin with. An hour and a half tops - enough time for dinner somewhere and a little talking. Leave him wanting to know more about you.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> First two are dinner and or a movie.
Click to expand...


I took a girl to a movie for a first date once, never again. You don't have time to really speak and get to know each other in a movie.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Its a very fine line, this all depends on the person, if you text too soon some people think your too clingy, if you wait too long people assume your not interested, sometimes you can't win. Dating is a loaded mine field, sometimes a small miscommunication can derail things before you even get started but thats life I guess, I've been single 2 years and I have dated alot and had some one night stands but nothing serious, I get derailed before a serious relationship can even start, I don't think I am meant for one, and I cannot keep the married women away from me. 3 of the women I have hooked up with in the past few years have been married.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> So true..very fine line.
> 
> Dont get me started on the married men lol
Click to expand...


I personally think the texting and social media has put more buffers in the way of creating a relationship, instead of just picking up the phone and calling now you have email/instagram/facebook/texting/twitter etc etc etc all of this just gets in the way of getting to know a person imo.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Its a very fine line, this all depends on the person, if you text too soon some people think your too clingy, if you wait too long people assume your not interested, sometimes you can't win. Dating is a loaded mine field, sometimes a small miscommunication can derail things before you even get started but thats life I guess, I've been single 2 years and I have dated alot and had some one night stands but nothing serious, I get derailed before a serious relationship can even start, I don't think I am meant for one, and I cannot keep the married women away from me. 3 of the women I have hooked up with in the past few years have been married.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> So true..very fine line.
> 
> Dont get me started on the married men lol
Click to expand...


Makes you wonder if so many married people are talking  us singles, maybe the marriage racket isnt all its cracked up to be? the happiest people I know are single.


----------



## Diana1180

High_Gravity said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Its a very fine line, this all depends on the person, if you text too soon some people think your too clingy, if you wait too long people assume your not interested, sometimes you can't win. Dating is a loaded mine field, sometimes a small miscommunication can derail things before you even get started but thats life I guess, I've been single 2 years and I have dated alot and had some one night stands but nothing serious, I get derailed before a serious relationship can even start, I don't think I am meant for one, and I cannot keep the married women away from me. 3 of the women I have hooked up with in the past few years have been married.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> So true..very fine line.
> 
> Dont get me started on the married men lol
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I personally think the texting and social media has put more buffers in the way of creating a relationship, instead of just picking up the phone and calling now you have email/instagram/facebook/texting/twitter etc etc etc all of this just gets in the way of getting to know a person imo.
Click to expand...


Social media....the downfall of society,

I think youre absolutley correct.


----------



## Diana1180

High_Gravity said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Its a very fine line, this all depends on the person, if you text too soon some people think your too clingy, if you wait too long people assume your not interested, sometimes you can't win. Dating is a loaded mine field, sometimes a small miscommunication can derail things before you even get started but thats life I guess, I've been single 2 years and I have dated alot and had some one night stands but nothing serious, I get derailed before a serious relationship can even start, I don't think I am meant for one, and I cannot keep the married women away from me. 3 of the women I have hooked up with in the past few years have been married.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> So true..very fine line.
> 
> Dont get me started on the married men lol
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Makes you wonder if so many married people are talking  us singles, maybe the marriage racket isnt all its cracked up to be? the happiest people I know are single.
Click to expand...


Sadly it just makes me think that no one wants a monogomous relationship anymore...and that you cant trust anyone,.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> So true..very fine line.
> 
> Dont get me started on the married men lol
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Makes you wonder if so many married people are talking  us singles, maybe the marriage racket isnt all its cracked up to be? the happiest people I know are single.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Sadly it just makes me think that no one wants a monogomous relationship anymore...and that you cant trust anyone,.
Click to expand...


Managomy is a very difficult concept to grasp, everyone is greedy and wants to have their cake and eat it too, and they want everything to be easy with no work, that includes relationships especially. When it comes to something that needs work fuck it throw it out the window.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> So true..very fine line.
> 
> Dont get me started on the married men lol
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I personally think the texting and social media has put more buffers in the way of creating a relationship, instead of just picking up the phone and calling now you have email/instagram/facebook/texting/twitter etc etc etc all of this just gets in the way of getting to know a person imo.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Social media....the downfall of society,
> 
> I think youre absolutley correct.
Click to expand...


Texting and social media has changed the way we interact with each other and not in a good way I think but thats just one of the problems, people want relationships to be easy and convenient for them these days and you very rarely can have it like that.


----------



## Samson

earlycuyler said:


> And many times its nice to just be alone.





I'd add that's especially true if you're married.


----------



## earlycuyler

High_Gravity said:


> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> AyeCantSeeYou said:
> 
> 
> 
> Far too many red flags with this whole story.
> 
> I would have never planned on spending an entire day with someone on a first date to begin with. An hour and a half tops - enough time for dinner somewhere and a little talking. Leave him wanting to know more about you.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> First two are dinner and or a movie.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I took a girl to a movie for a first date once, never again. You don't have time to really speak and get to know each other in a movie.
Click to expand...


Depends. All the talking im interested in doing is done during dinner. The last time I left to much time for conversation I ended up getting psychoanalised by a fucking wing nut, lol. Really it just depends.


----------



## Diana1180

High_Gravity said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> I personally think the texting and social media has put more buffers in the way of creating a relationship, instead of just picking up the phone and calling now you have email/instagram/facebook/texting/twitter etc etc etc all of this just gets in the way of getting to know a person imo.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Social media....the downfall of society,
> 
> I think youre absolutley correct.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Texting and social media has changed the way we interact with each other and not in a good way I think but thats just one of the problems, people want relationships to be easy and convenient for them these days and you very rarely can have it like that.
Click to expand...


Agreed again.


----------



## Derideo_Te

High_Gravity said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Makes you wonder if so many married people are talking  us singles, maybe the marriage racket isnt all its cracked up to be? the happiest people I know are single.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Sadly it just makes me think that no one wants a monogomous relationship anymore...and that you cant trust anyone,.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Managomy is a very difficult concept to grasp, everyone is greedy and wants to have their cake and eat it too, and they want everything to be easy with no work, that includes relationships especially. When it comes to something that needs work fuck it throw it out the window.
Click to expand...


The rule that anything worth having is worth working for applies to relationships too. If you find someone who understands that then you have a common basis to work on. Odds are those that don't appreciate this are not going to make good long term partners even under ideal circumstances.


----------



## pacer

...and so?


----------



## pacer




----------



## Disir

I really like being single.  A lot.  I like going where I want and doing what I want.


----------



## BDBoop

Disir said:


> I really like being single.  A lot.  I like going where I want and doing what I want.



We really are the lucky ones. "Single" is the default setting.


----------



## Disir

Yes, we are! The women that I work with ask me, after venting, if I miss all that.  My response is, "Nope."


----------



## earlycuyler

Disir said:


> I really like being single.  A lot.  I like going where I want and doing what I want.



The only thing I miss about being married is the wife and all the little things. Waking up and talking about the day, coming home and doing the same, cooking and eating all that. And doing all that with her. As it is now, I dont crave any of that. Im good. Back at my old job and fitting in. Everyone who works with me and knows me as well as my family and those I go to church with all say I am much better to be around now. So Im okay with out that. Having fun and yes, sex is about all im intrested in. So there is no small talk in the morning. Ill sit here finish my coffee,  and then I will climb up on this shit and paint it.


----------



## Disir

earlycuyler said:


> Disir said:
> 
> 
> 
> I really like being single.  A lot.  I like going where I want and doing what I want.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> The only thing I miss about being married is the wife and all the little things. Waking up and talking about the day, coming home and doing the same, cooking and eating all that. And doing all that with her. As it is now, I dont crave any of that. Im good. Back at my old job and fitting in. Everyone who works with me and knows me as well as my family and those I go to church with all say I am much better to be around now. So Im okay with out that. Having fun and yes, sex is about all im intrested in. So there is no small talk in the morning. Ill sit here finish my coffee,  and then I will climb up on this shit and paint it.
Click to expand...


Well, my ex and I separated in November of 2003 and were officially divorced in 2005.  I would be lying if I said that I missed any of that then. I don't miss it now either.  I can say that it gets easier over time for most people.  

I have a lot of interests and only so much time.  There is still so much to do and see. I would have to sacrifice something somewhere and I am just not willing to do that.


----------



## Diana1180

Good Morning and a (late)  Happy Easter to everyone


----------



## AquaAthena

Disir said:


> I really like being single.  A lot.  I like going where I want and doing what I want.



 And without answering to anyone about it all. I like the freedom of living without constraints of any kind. It took several attempts of trying life with partners to realize I am not cut out for it. In the past I was told several times, _you are too much for any one man_ but I thought they were crazy. Little did I know their observations would turn out to be the truth.

I did have a great time, trying though. But the rewards of marriage to me, were not worth the sacrifices. The men were good men. It is I, who needs more than marriage can offer. And I'm good with that. The good and bad times made me a better person. Everybody moved on to find what they really needed, to be content. Two are still single. I think they like being that way, also, or they wouldn't be.


----------



## BDBoop

Diana1180 said:


> Good Morning and a (late)  Happy Easter to everyone



Morning, pretty eyes!


----------



## Diana1180

I am 50/50 on the liking being single thing.

Half of me likes not having to deal with being in a relationship...the freedom as one put it before me.  Do what I want, when I want.  etc etc.

But the other half...really misses having someone there.  I have friends but I miss having that person to talk to thru the day or come home to.  Its just my daughter and I so I work, come home, be a mom...cook, homework, chores.

I love my life....but sometimes think it wouldnt be so bad with soemone else in it too.


----------



## BDBoop

AquaAthena said:


> Disir said:
> 
> 
> 
> I really like being single.  A lot.  I like going where I want and doing what I want.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> And without answering to anyone about it all. I like the freedom of living without constraints of any kind. It took several attempts of trying life with partners to realize I am not cut out for it. In the past I was told several times, _you are too much for any one man_ but I thought they were crazy. Little did I know their observations would turn out to be the truth.
> 
> I did have a great time, trying though. But the rewards of marriage to me, were not worth the sacrifices. The men were good men. It is I, who needs more than marriage can offer. And I'm good with that. The good and bad times made me a better person. Everybody moved on to find what they really needed, to be content. Two are still single. I think they like being that way, also, or they wouldn't be.
Click to expand...


Exactly.

Also, it's interesting when someone, actually more than one person speaks a fundamental truth about you - and it takes time and wisdom before you can see that they hit the nail right on the head.


----------



## High_Gravity

Disir said:


> I really like being single.  A lot.  I like going where I want and doing what I want.



Amen


----------



## BDBoop

But that's good, Diana. Because for you, either will do. It's kinda like being bisexual about committed relationships. 

The ones who worry me are the young women who honestly think that they cannot or will not be happy until they find their "other half."


----------



## Diana1180

BDBoop said:


> But that's good, Diana. Because for you, either will do. It's kinda like being bisexual about committed relationships.
> 
> The ones who worry me are the young women who honestly think that they cannot or will not be happy until they find their "other half."



lol..good way to put it.

My daughter is 15 and getting into that boy crazy stage.

I am trying to teach her that being single/ not having a bf is NOT a bad thing lol.


----------



## AquaAthena

Diana1180 said:


> But the other half...really misses having someone there.  I have friends *but I miss having that person to talk to thru the day or come home to.*




I looked for that too, until realizing most men really don't want to talk with their wives very often. I found friendships with women to be the most gratifying for the purpose of conversation and interests-in-common.


----------



## BDBoop

What I told her way early on is honey, the only thing worse than being single and lonely is being married - and lonely. Same goes for any relationship.


----------



## BDBoop

AquaAthena said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> But the other half...really misses having someone there.  I have friends *but I miss having that person to talk to thru the day or come home to.*
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I looked for that too, until realizing most men really don't want to talk with their wives very often. I found friendships with women to be the most gratifying for the purpose of conversation and interests-in-common.
Click to expand...


Oh, word yes. My BFF and I go on road trips, and the only time we shut up is at dinner. *not supposed to talk with your mouth full anyway, amirite??*  So we whip out our tablets and play online until we are back on the road.


----------



## Diana1180

High_Gravity said:


> Disir said:
> 
> 
> 
> I really like being single.  A lot.  I like going where I want and doing what I want.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Amen
Click to expand...


See...I dont know if I understand this argument.

In a relationship you should be able to do what you want when you want anyway.  Just in a relasionhip you choose the better option for you at the moment. Whether thats going out with your friends....or your partner.

I think its just called growing up/ maturity.  Do you choose to go out every night drinking...or go out one night with your buddies and choose a night with your girlfriend.

Chances are if you choose to go out every night drinking....the choice to be single really isnt up to you.

Not sure if I made sense there. lol  SOunded better in my head.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> BDBoop said:
> 
> 
> 
> But that's good, Diana. Because for you, either will do. It's kinda like being bisexual about committed relationships.
> 
> The ones who worry me are the young women who honestly think that they cannot or will not be happy until they find their "other half."
> 
> 
> 
> 
> lol..good way to put it.
> 
> My daughter is 15 and getting into that boy crazy stage.
> 
> I am trying to teach her that being single/ not having a bf is NOT a bad thing lol.
Click to expand...


Too many people put too much emphasis on being with someone, my ex gf is an example of this. After we broke up after 5 years she started dating her personal trainer for 6 months, after they broke up she literally married her sisters ex boyfriend after talking on line with him. She just cannot be single.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Disir said:
> 
> 
> 
> I really like being single.  A lot.  I like going where I want and doing what I want.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Amen
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> See...I dont know if I understand this argument.
> 
> In a relationship you should be able to do what you want when you want anyway.  Just in a relasionhip you choose the better option for you at the moment. Whether thats going out with your friends....or your partner.
> 
> I think its just called growing up/ maturity.  Do you choose to go out every night drinking...or go out one night with your buddies and choose a night with your girlfriend.
> 
> Chances are if you choose to go out every night drinking....the choice to be single really isnt up to you.
> 
> Not sure if I made sense there. lol  SOunded better in my head.
Click to expand...


Well if you have a girlfriend or a wife you can't really do what you want, if my friends want to go out to a strip club for example my wife might not want me going, or she won't say anything and we'll fight afterwards. If you are single you can just go with no reprucussions.


----------



## earlycuyler

High_Gravity said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Amen
> 
> 
> 
> 
> See...I dont know if I understand this argument.
> 
> In a relationship you should be able to do what you want when you want anyway.  Just in a relasionhip you choose the better option for you at the moment. Whether thats going out with your friends....or your partner.
> 
> I think its just called growing up/ maturity.  Do you choose to go out every night drinking...or go out one night with your buddies and choose a night with your girlfriend.
> 
> Chances are if you choose to go out every night drinking....the choice to be single really isnt up to you.
> 
> Not sure if I made sense there. lol  SOunded better in my head.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Well if you have a girlfriend or a wife you can't really do what you want, if my friends want to go out to a strip club for example my wife might not want me going, or she won't say anything and we'll fight afterwards. If you are single you can just go with no reprucussions.
Click to expand...


Thing is, you dont have to compromise.  If you want to be married you may stop going to strip clubs for example. If one doesnt want to stop, one might consider not getting married.


----------



## High_Gravity

earlycuyler said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> See...I dont know if I understand this argument.
> 
> In a relationship you should be able to do what you want when you want anyway.  Just in a relasionhip you choose the better option for you at the moment. Whether thats going out with your friends....or your partner.
> 
> I think its just called growing up/ maturity.  Do you choose to go out every night drinking...or go out one night with your buddies and choose a night with your girlfriend.
> 
> Chances are if you choose to go out every night drinking....the choice to be single really isnt up to you.
> 
> Not sure if I made sense there. lol  SOunded better in my head.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Well if you have a girlfriend or a wife you can't really do what you want, if my friends want to go out to a strip club for example my wife might not want me going, or she won't say anything and we'll fight afterwards. If you are single you can just go with no reprucussions.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Thing is, you dont have to compromise.  If you want to be married you may stop going to strip clubs for example. If one doesnt want to stop, one might consider not getting married.
Click to expand...


There is an alternative, my ex wife actually went to the strip club with me lol she was alot of fun when things were good, she got motor boated by all the dancers and got several free lap dances, good times.


----------



## Diana1180

High_Gravity said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Amen
> 
> 
> 
> 
> See...I dont know if I understand this argument.
> 
> In a relationship you should be able to do what you want when you want anyway.  Just in a relasionhip you choose the better option for you at the moment. Whether thats going out with your friends....or your partner.
> 
> I think its just called growing up/ maturity.  Do you choose to go out every night drinking...or go out one night with your buddies and choose a night with your girlfriend.
> 
> Chances are if you choose to go out every night drinking....the choice to be single really isnt up to you.
> 
> Not sure if I made sense there. lol  SOunded better in my head.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Well if you have a girlfriend or a wife you can't really do what you want, if my friends want to go out to a strip club for example my wife might not want me going, or she won't say anything and we'll fight afterwards. If you are single you can just go with no reprucussions.
Click to expand...


Yes..but if you like to go to strip clubs...dont date/marry a girl who hates you going to strip clubs lol.  You set yourself up right there.

I really could care less if my man (hypothetical) goes to a strip club with the guys.  If he is going to cheat on me...he will do it.  I trust until given reason not to.  If he chooses to go to a strip club every night...then its obvious he doesnt want to spend time with me and we need to rethink things.  There will be nights i want to go out with the girls too.

I dont want you up my ass 24/7...and i doubt you want me up yours either.  

Its about priorities i guess.


----------



## earlycuyler

High_Gravity said:


> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Well if you have a girlfriend or a wife you can't really do what you want, if my friends want to go out to a strip club for example my wife might not want me going, or she won't say anything and we'll fight afterwards. If you are single you can just go with no reprucussions.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Thing is, you dont have to compromise.  If you want to be married you may stop going to strip clubs for example. If one doesnt want to stop, one might consider not getting married.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> There is an alternative, my ex wife actually went to the strip club with me lol she was alot of fun when things were good, she got motor boated by all the dancers and got several free lap dances, good times.
Click to expand...


See? Common interests.  There is a give and take. Both have to be intrested in working on it. Im not. Many bere seem to not be either and its cool to see so many so open and frank about it. Makes me feel like less of an ashole.


----------



## AquaAthena

Diana1180 said:


> BDBoop said:
> 
> 
> 
> But that's good, Diana. Because for you, either will do. It's kinda like being bisexual about committed relationships.
> 
> The ones who worry me are the young women who honestly think that they cannot or will not be happy until they find their "other half."
> 
> 
> 
> 
> lol..good way to put it.
> 
> My daughter is 15 and getting into that boy crazy stage.
> 
> I am trying to teach her that being single/ not having a bf is NOT a bad thing lol.
Click to expand...


Being 15 was the worst year of my life. My poor parents...


----------



## pacer

Diana1180 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> See...I dont know if I understand this argument.
> 
> In a relationship you should be able to do what you want when you want anyway.  Just in a relasionhip you choose the better option for you at the moment. Whether thats going out with your friends....or your partner.
> 
> I think its just called growing up/ maturity.  Do you choose to go out every night drinking...or go out one night with your buddies and choose a night with your girlfriend.
> 
> Chances are if you choose to go out every night drinking....the choice to be single really isnt up to you.
> 
> Not sure if I made sense there. lol  SOunded better in my head.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Well if you have a girlfriend or a wife you can't really do what you want, if my friends want to go out to a strip club for example my wife might not want me going, or she won't say anything and we'll fight afterwards. If you are single you can just go with no reprucussions.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Yes..but if you like to go to strip clubs...dont date/marry a girl who hates you going to strip clubs lol.  You set yourself up right there.
> 
> I really could care less if my man (hypothetical) goes to a strip club with the guys.  If he is going to cheat on me...he will do it.  I trust until given reason not to.  If he chooses to go to a strip club every night...then its obvious he doesnt want to spend time with me and we need to rethink things.  There will be nights i want to go out with the girls too.
> 
> I dont want you up my ass 24/7...and i doubt you want me up yours either.
> 
> Its about priorities i guess.
Click to expand...

Well said, Diana.  A healthy relationship is interdependent, not co-dependent.  It is important to maintain ones independence while striking a balance with respect to time spent together.


----------



## Diana1180

pacer said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Well if you have a girlfriend or a wife you can't really do what you want, if my friends want to go out to a strip club for example my wife might not want me going, or she won't say anything and we'll fight afterwards. If you are single you can just go with no reprucussions.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Yes..but if you like to go to strip clubs...dont date/marry a girl who hates you going to strip clubs lol.  You set yourself up right there.
> 
> I really could care less if my man (hypothetical) goes to a strip club with the guys.  If he is going to cheat on me...he will do it.  I trust until given reason not to.  If he chooses to go to a strip club every night...then its obvious he doesnt want to spend time with me and we need to rethink things.  There will be nights i want to go out with the girls too.
> 
> I dont want you up my ass 24/7...and i doubt you want me up yours either.
> 
> Its about priorities i guess.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> Well said, Diana.  A healthy relationship is interdependent, not co-dependent.  It is important to maintain ones independence while striking a balance with respect to time spent together.
Click to expand...


You said it better and with less words lol.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> See...I dont know if I understand this argument.
> 
> In a relationship you should be able to do what you want when you want anyway.  Just in a relasionhip you choose the better option for you at the moment. Whether thats going out with your friends....or your partner.
> 
> I think its just called growing up/ maturity.  Do you choose to go out every night drinking...or go out one night with your buddies and choose a night with your girlfriend.
> 
> Chances are if you choose to go out every night drinking....the choice to be single really isnt up to you.
> 
> Not sure if I made sense there. lol  SOunded better in my head.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Well if you have a girlfriend or a wife you can't really do what you want, if my friends want to go out to a strip club for example my wife might not want me going, or she won't say anything and we'll fight afterwards. If you are single you can just go with no reprucussions.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Yes..but if you like to go to strip clubs...dont date/marry a girl who hates you going to strip clubs lol.  You set yourself up right there.
> 
> I really could care less if my man (hypothetical) goes to a strip club with the guys.  If he is going to cheat on me...he will do it.  I trust until given reason not to.  If he chooses to go to a strip club every night...then its obvious he doesnt want to spend time with me and we need to rethink things.  There will be nights i want to go out with the girls too.
> 
> I dont want you up my ass 24/7...and i doubt you want me up yours either.
> 
> Its about priorities i guess.
Click to expand...


lol I used strip clubs as an example they can be fun but I haven't been to one in a few years, I prefer to go somewhere where you actually stand a chance with the girls lol, those dancers just want your money.


----------



## Diana1180

High_Gravity said:


> lol I used strip clubs as an example they can be fun but I haven't been to one in a few years, I prefer to go somewhere where you actually stand a chance with the girls lol, those dancers just want your money.



Oh I know..but what I said can go with any scenario also.  Strip clubs, bars, friends house to play games, casino..etc etc.  Its all the same.

Dont hit on the bartenders either...we might show you our cleavage but we just have to make rent lol.

Funny how all of us single people in the Singles Bar seems so normal lol.


----------



## BDBoop

Diana1180 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> lol I used strip clubs as an example they can be fun but I haven't been to one in a few years, I prefer to go somewhere where you actually stand a chance with the girls lol, those dancers just want your money.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Oh I know..but what I said can go with any scenario also.  Strip clubs, bars, friends house to play games, casino..etc etc.  Its all the same.
> 
> Dont hit on the bartenders either...we might show you our cleavage but we just have to make rent lol.
> 
> Funny how all of us single people in the Singles Bar seems so normal lol.
Click to expand...


It's been fun chatting this morning, seeing different perspectives.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> lol I used strip clubs as an example they can be fun but I haven't been to one in a few years, I prefer to go somewhere where you actually stand a chance with the girls lol, those dancers just want your money.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Oh I know..but what I said can go with any scenario also.  Strip clubs, bars, friends house to play games, casino..etc etc.  Its all the same.
> 
> Dont hit on the bartenders either...we might show you our cleavage but we just have to make rent lol.
> 
> Funny how all of us single people in the Singles Bar seems so normal lol.
Click to expand...


My ex gf was a bartender, she showed me her cleavage and we ended up living together for 5 years. If you hit on a bartender and she buys you free drinks with her own tip money, she likes you.


----------



## High_Gravity

BDBoop said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> lol I used strip clubs as an example they can be fun but I haven't been to one in a few years, I prefer to go somewhere where you actually stand a chance with the girls lol, those dancers just want your money.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Oh I know..but what I said can go with any scenario also.  Strip clubs, bars, friends house to play games, casino..etc etc.  Its all the same.
> 
> Dont hit on the bartenders either...we might show you our cleavage but we just have to make rent lol.
> 
> Funny how all of us single people in the Singles Bar seems so normal lol.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> It's been fun chatting this morning, seeing different perspectives.
Click to expand...


I agree, team single rules.


----------



## Diana1180

High_Gravity said:


> I agree, team single rules.



Yes, you guys keep me company when I dont want to work.

Like right now.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> I agree, team single rules.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Yes, you guys keep me company when I dont want to work.
> 
> Like right now.
Click to expand...


Lol, I'm in the same boat, browsing and working. I know the week just started but I got to figure out where to happy hour wednesday and what to do this weekend, my FWB is out of town this weekend so I need to come up with something to do.


----------



## Diana1180

High_Gravity said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> I agree, team single rules.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Yes, you guys keep me company when I dont want to work.
> 
> Like right now.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Lol, I'm in the same boat, browsing and working. I know the week just started but I got to figure out where to happy hour wednesday and what to do this weekend, my FWB is out of town this weekend so I need to come up with something to do.
Click to expand...


I work all weekend so I have no plans to make lol.



*Edited to take out the comment that made me look like a floozy.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> Yes, you guys keep me company when I dont want to work.
> 
> Like right now.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Lol, I'm in the same boat, browsing and working. I know the week just started but I got to figure out where to happy hour wednesday and what to do this weekend, my FWB is out of town this weekend so I need to come up with something to do.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I work all weekend so I have no plans to make lol.
> 
> 
> 
> *Edited to take out the comment that made me look like a floozy.
Click to expand...


I will be working Overtime Saturday, but I will go out as well. All work and no play makes Gravity a dull boy.


----------



## BDBoop

Diana1180 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> Yes, you guys keep me company when I dont want to work.
> 
> Like right now.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Lol, I'm in the same boat, browsing and working. I know the week just started but I got to figure out where to happy hour wednesday and what to do this weekend, my FWB is out of town this weekend so I need to come up with something to do.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I work all weekend so I have no plans to make lol.
> 
> 
> 
> *Edited to take out the comment that made me look like a floozy.
Click to expand...


You hameless slushie!!

I don't actually think so. I just like saying that.


----------



## earlycuyler

Im going out th dinner and a show on Wednesday.  Not so much taming the beast as just getting out.


----------



## Diana1180

I teach at the prison in Wednesdays so that night is shot. 

Then picked up extra shifts at the restaurant and work Thursday and Friday night and a double on Saturday.

Add that to my full time .... 

I will be a b-tch come Sunday. Lol


----------



## BDBoop

This weekend is one of the weird ones. I was off Thursday, Saturday and Monday. Next weekend happens once in a blue moon: I am off Saturday and Sunday!!


----------



## BDBoop

And remember, Singles Bar denizens! Happiness is 'Dial' spelled backwards.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> I teach at the prison in Wednesdays so that night is shot.
> 
> Then picked up extra shifts at the restaurant and work Thursday and Friday night and a double on Saturday.
> 
> Add that to my full time ....
> 
> I will be a b-tch come Sunday. Lol



Wow your tougher than me, I bitched and moaned when I worked 3 hours Overtime Saturday morning lol.


----------



## BDBoop

Okay, just one more and then I'll shut it.


----------



## earlycuyler

BDBoop said:


> Okay, just one more and then I'll shut it.



Remember dude's.  Wrap your tool my wiggas.


----------



## Diana1180

High_Gravity said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> I teach at the prison in Wednesdays so that night is shot.
> 
> Then picked up extra shifts at the restaurant and work Thursday and Friday night and a double on Saturday.
> 
> Add that to my full time ....
> 
> I will be a b-tch come Sunday. Lol
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Wow your tougher than me, I bitched and moaned when I worked 3 hours Overtime Saturday morning lol.
Click to expand...


Ya...just wait and see how tough I am sunday when I am whining about how tired I am or that my feet hurt and dont get out of my hoodie and yoga pants all day.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> I teach at the prison in Wednesdays so that night is shot.
> 
> Then picked up extra shifts at the restaurant and work Thursday and Friday night and a double on Saturday.
> 
> Add that to my full time ....
> 
> I will be a b-tch come Sunday. Lol
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Wow your tougher than me, I bitched and moaned when I worked 3 hours Overtime Saturday morning lol.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Ya...just wait and see how tough I am sunday when I am whining about how tired I am or that my feet hurt and dont get out of my hoodie and yoga pants all day.
Click to expand...


I understand, we all need a nice 3 day weekend to relax and unwind.


----------



## Diana1180

Yes we do...but not happening for me.  

Have to fly to DC on MOnday for meetings.

No wonder I am single lol


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> Yes we do...but not happening for me.
> 
> Have to fly to DC on MOnday for meetings.
> 
> No wonder I am single lol



You are a very busy bee.


----------



## Diana1180

High_Gravity said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> Yes we do...but not happening for me.
> 
> Have to fly to DC on MOnday for meetings.
> 
> No wonder I am single lol
> 
> 
> 
> 
> You are a very busy bee.
Click to expand...


Noticing the Celtics picture... Fan of the Celtics..or just Rondo?


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> Yes we do...but not happening for me.
> 
> Have to fly to DC on MOnday for meetings.
> 
> No wonder I am single lol
> 
> 
> 
> 
> You are a very busy bee.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Noticing the Celtics picture... Fan of the Celtics..or just Rondo?
Click to expand...


Both, love the Celtics!


----------



## BDBoop

Mornin, High and Di!


----------



## Diana1180

Good morning everyone.

I hope everyones night was peaceful.


----------



## BDBoop

Diana1180 said:


> Good morning everyone.
> 
> I hope everyones night was peaceful.



It was my night off, and I slept through it.


----------



## Diana1180

BDBoop said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> Good morning everyone.
> 
> I hope everyones night was peaceful.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> It was my night off, and I slept through it.
Click to expand...


Cant get more peaceful than that I suppose.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> Good morning everyone.
> 
> I hope everyones night was peaceful.



Watched some Breaking Bad and went to sleep around 1100, not bad. I hate waking up tired and dragging at work.


----------



## BDBoop

Diana1180 said:


> BDBoop said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> Good morning everyone.
> 
> I hope everyones night was peaceful.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> It was my night off, and I slept through it.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Cant get more peaceful than that I suppose.
Click to expand...


Not really.

Woke up and wrote 843 words, want to make it a habit again. If I'm not writing, I should be reading about how to be a better writer - so far, I'm just procrastinating like a sumbee (although I do have almost 40k words in what was going to be my first novel. I had a fellow author go over it and on her advice, it's going to be my third.)


----------



## Diana1180

I caught up on Game of Thrones and passed out around 11.

But I am off tomorrow..heading into the city with my daughter.  Shopping, girlie things and lunch.  Hit up a museum...


----------



## BDBoop

Sounds fun. I'm still early in season two. It's another "well, why don't you go do that now, then" procrastination block. Yes, seriously; I procrastinate doing things I enjoy.


----------



## AquaAthena

High_Gravity said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> I teach at the prison in Wednesdays so that night is shot.
> 
> Then picked up extra shifts at the restaurant and work Thursday and Friday night and a double on Saturday.
> 
> Add that to my full time ....
> 
> I will be a b-tch come Sunday. Lol
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Wow your tougher than me, I bitched and moaned when I worked 3 hours Overtime Saturday morning lol.
Click to expand...


Gads, I do admire her tenacity. She does what she has to do, to survive.


----------



## Diana1180

AquaAthena said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> I teach at the prison in Wednesdays so that night is shot.
> 
> Then picked up extra shifts at the restaurant and work Thursday and Friday night and a double on Saturday.
> 
> Add that to my full time ....
> 
> I will be a b-tch come Sunday. Lol
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Wow your tougher than me, I bitched and moaned when I worked 3 hours Overtime Saturday morning lol.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Gads, I do admire her tenacity. She does what she has to do, to survive.
Click to expand...


Actually I was being nice picking up the extra shifts.  Someone needed the nights off.

I typically only work the part time job on Thursday and Saturday nights.

Teenagers are expensive yo...and well...I like to shop lol.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> AquaAthena said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Wow your tougher than me, I bitched and moaned when I worked 3 hours Overtime Saturday morning lol.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Gads, I do admire her tenacity. She does what she has to do, to survive.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Actually I was being nice picking up the extra shifts.  Someone needed the nights off.
> 
> I typically only work the part time job on Thursday and Saturday nights.
> 
> Teenagers are expensive yo...and well...I like to shop lol.
Click to expand...


Yup going out is expensive too, I work overtime for extra money for happy hour and such.


----------



## Diana1180

High_Gravity said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> AquaAthena said:
> 
> 
> 
> Gads, I do admire her tenacity. She does what she has to do, to survive.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Actually I was being nice picking up the extra shifts.  Someone needed the nights off.
> 
> I typically only work the part time job on Thursday and Saturday nights.
> 
> Teenagers are expensive yo...and well...I like to shop lol.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Yup going out is expensive too, I work overtime for extra money for happy hour and such.
Click to expand...


My full time job (career) pays the bills...part time job is spending/ fun money.


----------



## BDBoop

I just earned $36 because I've done so many surveys, and forgot to ask for my pay.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> Actually I was being nice picking up the extra shifts.  Someone needed the nights off.
> 
> I typically only work the part time job on Thursday and Saturday nights.
> 
> Teenagers are expensive yo...and well...I like to shop lol.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Yup going out is expensive too, I work overtime for extra money for happy hour and such.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> My full time job (career) pays the bills...part time job is spending/ fun money.
Click to expand...


Yeah Overtime is my fuck off money lol.


----------



## Statistikhengst

High_Gravity said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Yup going out is expensive too, I work overtime for extra money for happy hour and such.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> My full time job (career) pays the bills...part time job is spending/ fun money.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Yeah Overtime is my fuck off money lol.
Click to expand...



One word too many in that sentence.


----------



## High_Gravity

Statistikhengst said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> My full time job (career) pays the bills...part time job is spending/ fun money.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Yeah Overtime is my fuck off money lol.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> 
> One word too many in that sentence.
Click to expand...


----------



## Diana1180

Statistikhengst said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> My full time job (career) pays the bills...part time job is spending/ fun money.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Yeah Overtime is my fuck off money lol.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> 
> One word too many in that sentence.
Click to expand...


ha ha ha...glad you said it and not me.  

I dont know him well enough to pick on him yet lol.


----------



## Statistikhengst

It's all good, it's all good...


----------



## Samson

BDBoop said:


> I just earned $36 because I've done so many surveys, and forgot to ask for my pay.



Before taxes?


----------



## Samson

High_Gravity said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> AquaAthena said:
> 
> 
> 
> Gads, I do admire her tenacity. She does what she has to do, to survive.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Actually I was being nice picking up the extra shifts.  Someone needed the nights off.
> 
> I typically only work the part time job on Thursday and Saturday nights.
> 
> Teenagers are expensive yo...and well...I like to shop lol.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Yup going out is expensive too, I work overtime for extra money for happy hour and such.
Click to expand...


We all wish we could be as successful


----------



## AquaAthena

Samson said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> Actually I was being nice picking up the extra shifts.  Someone needed the nights off.
> 
> I typically only work the part time job on Thursday and Saturday nights.
> 
> Teenagers are expensive yo...and well...I like to shop lol.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Yup going out is expensive too, I work overtime for extra money for happy hour and such.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> We all wish we could be as successful
Click to expand...


Wouldn't have one.  Eww.  I think it good though, that they are available for those who would.


----------



## Bloodrock44

High_Gravity said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> Good morning everyone.
> 
> I hope everyones night was peaceful.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Watched some Breaking Bad and went to sleep around 1100, not bad. I hate waking up tired and dragging at work.
Click to expand...


Uh...what is this thing called work? Someone please explain.


----------



## BDBoop

Bloodrock44 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> Good morning everyone.
> 
> I hope everyones night was peaceful.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Watched some Breaking Bad and went to sleep around 1100, not bad. I hate waking up tired and dragging at work.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Uh...what is this thing called work? Someone please explain.
Click to expand...


You know. That thing you did for decades that involved crying all the way there.


----------



## earlycuyler

So, I met this chick through a guy at work. Turns out we knew eachother loosely for a bit years ago through that guy. All was going well until we were out and he mentioned that I fooled around with a black chick way back chick when. Since then, no calls, no emails and no texts.


----------



## BDBoop

earlycuyler said:


> So, I met this chick through a guy at work. Turns out we knew eachother loosely for a bit years ago through that guy. All was going well until we were out and he mentioned that I fooled around with a black chick way back chick when. Since then, no calls, no emails and no texts.



Good grief. Some people's kids.


----------



## AquaAthena

earlycuyler said:


> So, I met this chick through a guy at work. Turns out we knew eachother loosely for a bit years ago through that guy. All was going well until we were out and he mentioned that I fooled around with a black chick way back chick when. Since then, no calls, no emails and no texts.



Good. You found out sooner than later, much about the other.


----------



## High_Gravity

earlycuyler said:


> So, I met this chick through a guy at work. Turns out we knew eachother loosely for a bit years ago through that guy. All was going well until we were out and he mentioned that I fooled around with a black chick way back chick when. Since then, no calls, no emails and no texts.



SMFH!


----------



## WelfareQueen

earlycuyler said:


> So, I met this chick through a guy at work. Turns out we knew eachother loosely for a bit years ago through that guy. All was going well until we were out and he mentioned that I fooled around with a black chick way back chick when. Since then, no calls, no emails and no texts.





Must be jealous.  Like AA said....good to find out now.


----------



## earlycuyler

Its weird though. I have heard this stuff about dudes. Not ever chicks.


----------



## Samson

earlycuyler said:


> Its weird though. I have heard this stuff about dudes. Not ever chicks.



Agreed.

But what's really weird is that men would ever be so much more descriminating than women.

Typically THAT is not the case.


----------



## Disir

So, it's Sunday.  I love being single on Sundays. You know what this means? After I put my kid to sleep tonight, the remote control is mine. All mine. No sharing. Yay me.


----------



## BDBoop

Mine is "6:10 pm and I want to go to bed with my Kindle? NO problemo."


----------



## High_Gravity

Morning guys, another day still single lol.


----------



## AquaAthena

High_Gravity said:


> Morning guys, another day still single lol.



Another day of being in gratitude, for that. 

Good morning, High_Gravity.


----------



## BDBoop

High_Gravity said:


> Morning guys, another day still single lol.



Ya goob. Happy Monday,HG!!

So today is labor day, my only-bonly is 33. THIRTY-THREE!! How did this happen? I'm only 29.  I donut belief it.

Anyway - she can do a dead-on rendition of this song, and hello, I'm Boop! So I sent it to her.


----------



## High_Gravity

Hey Boop I am going to register on that meet up site this week no more putting it off.


----------



## BDBoop

High_Gravity said:


> Hey Boop I am going to register on that meet up site this week no more putting it off.



WooT!!! Then look through the various groups, and start sending RSVP's. You're gonna have a fun summer, mister. Get out there and meet some peeps.


----------



## High_Gravity

BDBoop said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Hey Boop I am going to register on that meet up site this week no more putting it off.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> WooT!!! Then look through the various groups, and start sending RSVP's. You're gonna have a fun summer, mister. Get out there and meet some peeps.
Click to expand...


Drinking and going out to clubs and bars can be fun but I need to do something different, that can't be everything that I do.


----------



## BDBoop

High_Gravity said:


> BDBoop said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Hey Boop I am going to register on that meet up site this week no more putting it off.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> WooT!!! Then look through the various groups, and start sending RSVP's. You're gonna have a fun summer, mister. Get out there and meet some peeps.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Drinking and going out to clubs and bars can be fun but I need to do something different, that can't be everything that I do.
Click to expand...


Exactly. Diversification. You go to the same place, you meet the same kind of woman every damn time. This way - what are your interests? Want to go bowling? Mini golfing, dance/cooking lessons, - what? Get out there, meet some other women that don't want to meet some asshole in a bar.

No offence intended.


----------



## pacer

True, BDBoop.  Getting involved in various activities certainly presents opportunities to meet new people.  The bar scene allows you to lose your inhibitions and connect with people on a more intimate level but once the night is over, the loneliness comes creeping back in, unless you find yourself hooked up with some loser at the end of the night.    Just kidding!!!  Loneliness is a state of mind.  It is not about being alone but the perception of being alone.  You could be married or in a relationship with a significant other and still feel lonely or you could be surrounded by dozens of people and still feel very much alone.


----------



## High_Gravity

pacer said:


> True, BDBoop.  Getting involved in various activities certainly presents opportunities to meet new people.  The bar scene allows you to lose your inhibitions and connect with people on a more intimate level but once the night is over, the loneliness comes creeping back in, unless you find yourself hooked up with some loser at the end of the night.    Just kidding!!!  Loneliness is a state of mind.  It is not about being alone but the perception of being alone.  *You could be married or in a relationship with a significant other and still feel lonely or you could be surrounded by dozens of people and still feel very much alone*.



This is Gods honest truth.


----------



## Statistikhengst

High_Gravity said:


> pacer said:
> 
> 
> 
> True, BDBoop.  Getting involved in various activities certainly presents opportunities to meet new people.  The bar scene allows you to lose your inhibitions and connect with people on a more intimate level but once the night is over, the loneliness comes creeping back in, unless you find yourself hooked up with some loser at the end of the night.    Just kidding!!!  Loneliness is a state of mind.  It is not about being alone but the perception of being alone.  *You could be married or in a relationship with a significant other and still feel lonely or you could be surrounded by dozens of people and still feel very much alone*.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> This is Gods honest truth.
Click to expand...



Yepp.


----------



## Statistikhengst

High_Gravity said:


> BDBoop said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Hey Boop I am going to register on that meet up site this week no more putting it off.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> WooT!!! Then look through the various groups, and start sending RSVP's. You're gonna have a fun summer, mister. Get out there and meet some peeps.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Drinking and going out to clubs and bars can be fun but I need to do something different, that can't be everything that I do.
Click to expand...


With a little bit of luck, one day, when you least expect it, perhaps the woman of your dreams will walk into your life, and it will be a woman you didn't meet at a bar. Maybe it could be a woman with whom you get into a car wreck and the two of you are arguing about insurance policies. Or it can be a woman who sings in your church choir. Or a woman you help get up when her bike goes into a ditch.

My best buddy here met his wife through kick-boxing. That's a little unusual, maybe, maybe not, but they sure did hit it off.

You just never know.


----------



## Wake

JohnL.Burke said:


> Welcome to the USMB singles bar. Pull up a stool, order a drink and tell us about yourself.



Ha, what a good idea. 

One Roman Coke on the rocks, please.

I'm a 25-year-old young guy with a penchant for caring for people. My profession as a caregiver/CNA revolves around my personality, and in time I'll be an R.N. taking care of those in need. My hobbies include heirloom gardening, playing any game that involves strategy, and enjoying the art of cooking. I think a lot, too. 

6'4", close to athletic, dirty blonde hair, hazel eyes, fair complexion, an articulate manner, a quiet demeanor, a gentle nature. I wear leather shoe-boots from Skechers because I'm weird (nah, they're extremely durable). 

*EDIT:* These are the ones I wear.


----------



## Statistikhengst

Wake said:


> JohnL.Burke said:
> 
> 
> 
> Welcome to the USMB singles bar. Pull up a stool, order a drink and tell us about yourself.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Ha, what a good idea.
> 
> One Roman Coke on the rocks, please.
> 
> I'm a 25-year-old young guy with a penchant for caring for people. My profession as a caregiver/CNA revolves around my personality, and in time I'll be an R.N. taking care of those in need. My hobbies include heirloom gardening, playing any game that involves strategy, and enjoying the art of cooking. I think a lot, too.
> 
> 6'4", close to athletic, dirty blonde hair, hazel eyes, fair complexion, an articulate manner, a quiet demeanor, a gentle nature. I wear leather shoe-boots from Skechers because I'm weird (nah, they're extremely durable).
Click to expand...









Skechers? Never heard of em.


----------



## AquaAthena

Statistikhengst said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> BDBoop said:
> 
> 
> 
> WooT!!! Then look through the various groups, and start sending RSVP's. You're gonna have a fun summer, mister. Get out there and meet some peeps.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Drinking and going out to clubs and bars can be fun but I need to do something different, that can't be everything that I do.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> With a little bit of luck, one day, when you least expect it, perhaps the woman of your dreams will walk into your life, and it will be a woman you didn't meet at a bar. Maybe it could be a woman with whom you get into a car wreck and the two of you are arguing about insurance policies. Or it can be a woman who sings in your church choir. Or a woman you help get up when her bike goes into a ditch.
> 
> My best buddy here met his wife through kick-boxing. That's a little unusual, maybe, maybe not, but they sure did hit it off.
> 
> You just never know.
Click to expand...


High_Gravity would meet women in a health-club and get in shape, at the same time. Juice bars are great convo-areas.   The kind of women he would meet would be health-conscious women and their minds might appeal to him, as well as their other _assets._


----------



## High_Gravity

Statistikhengst said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> BDBoop said:
> 
> 
> 
> WooT!!! Then look through the various groups, and start sending RSVP's. You're gonna have a fun summer, mister. Get out there and meet some peeps.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Drinking and going out to clubs and bars can be fun but I need to do something different, that can't be everything that I do.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> With a little bit of luck, one day, when you least expect it, perhaps the woman of your dreams will walk into your life, and it will be a woman you didn't meet at a bar. Maybe it could be a woman with whom you get into a car wreck and the two of you are arguing about insurance policies. Or it can be a woman who sings in your church choir. Or a woman you help get up when her bike goes into a ditch.
> 
> My best buddy here met his wife through kick-boxing. That's a little unusual, maybe, maybe not, but they sure did hit it off.
> 
> You just never know.
Click to expand...


I just need to stop focusing so much on finding someone and just focus on trying to be happy right now.


----------



## High_Gravity

AquaAthena said:


> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Drinking and going out to clubs and bars can be fun but I need to do something different, that can't be everything that I do.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> With a little bit of luck, one day, when you least expect it, perhaps the woman of your dreams will walk into your life, and it will be a woman you didn't meet at a bar. Maybe it could be a woman with whom you get into a car wreck and the two of you are arguing about insurance policies. Or it can be a woman who sings in your church choir. Or a woman you help get up when her bike goes into a ditch.
> 
> My best buddy here met his wife through kick-boxing. That's a little unusual, maybe, maybe not, but they sure did hit it off.
> 
> You just never know.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> High_Gravity would meet women in a health-club and get in shape, at the same time. Juice bars are great convo-areas.   The kind of women he would meet would be health-conscious women and their minds might appeal to him, as well as their other _assets._
Click to expand...


LOL I like the way you think!


----------



## Statistikhengst

High_Gravity said:


> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Drinking and going out to clubs and bars can be fun but I need to do something different, that can't be everything that I do.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> With a little bit of luck, one day, when you least expect it, perhaps the woman of your dreams will walk into your life, and it will be a woman you didn't meet at a bar. Maybe it could be a woman with whom you get into a car wreck and the two of you are arguing about insurance policies. Or it can be a woman who sings in your church choir. Or a woman you help get up when her bike goes into a ditch.
> 
> My best buddy here met his wife through kick-boxing. That's a little unusual, maybe, maybe not, but they sure did hit it off.
> 
> You just never know.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I just need to stop focusing so much on finding someone and just focus on trying to be happy right now.
Click to expand...



That's excellent advice for all of us, I would say.


----------



## AyeCantSeeYou

High_Gravity said:


> I just need to stop focusing so much on finding someone and just focus on trying to be happy right now.



If you aren't happy with yourself, you'll never be happy with someone else.


----------



## pacer

High_Gravity said:


> I just need to stop focusing so much on finding someone and just focus on trying to be happy right now.


So true, High.  Focuss on yourself.  Happiness comes from within.  No one else can bring you happiness.

I would suggest keeping a daily journal.  This was suggested to me years ago.  Every day, at the times when you are feeling lonely or sad or depressed, enter the experience and what triggered the emotions into the daily journal.  Do not reread the journal entries; put the journal aside every day for about one or two weeks.  

At the end of the one/two week period, reread the journal and see if any patterns developed and what the triggers were that caused you to feel depressed or lonely.  Then you can work on alleviating the triggers; so, for example, if every day at supper time, you feel lonely or depressed, do something differently, i.e. call a friend, go out to dinner, etc.

The exercise of keeping a journal is very therapeutic.  It keeps you focussed, allows you to work out your feelings in writing, allows you the learn about yourself, and allows you to connect with your own heart.


----------



## High_Gravity

pacer said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> I just need to stop focusing so much on finding someone and just focus on trying to be happy right now.
> 
> 
> 
> So true, High.  Focuss on yourself.  Happiness comes from within.  No one else can bring you happiness.
> 
> I would suggest keeping a daily journal.  This was suggested to me years ago.  Every day, at the times when you are feeling lonely or sad or depressed, enter the experience and what triggered the emotions into the daily journal.  Do not reread the journal entries; put the journal aside every day for about one or two weeks.
> 
> At the end of the one/two week period, reread the journal and see if any patterns developed and what the triggers were that caused you to feel depressed or lonely.  Then you can work on alleviating the triggers; so, for example, if every day at supper time, you feel lonely or depressed, do something differently, i.e. call a friend, go out to dinner, etc.
> 
> The exercise of keeping a journal is very therapeutic.  It keeps you focussed, allows you to work out your feelings in writing, allows you the learn about yourself, and allows you to connect with your own heart.
Click to expand...


Thats some good advice.


----------



## High_Gravity

AyeCantSeeYou said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> I just need to stop focusing so much on finding someone and just focus on trying to be happy right now.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> If you aren't happy with yourself, you'll never be happy with someone else.
Click to expand...


You are damn right.


----------



## Diana1180

High_Gravity said:


> AyeCantSeeYou said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> I just need to stop focusing so much on finding someone and just focus on trying to be happy right now.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> If you aren't happy with yourself, you'll never be happy with someone else.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> You are damn right.
Click to expand...


Amen!


----------



## Statistikhengst

Diana1180 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> AyeCantSeeYou said:
> 
> 
> 
> If you aren't happy with yourself, you'll never be happy with someone else.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> You are damn right.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Amen!
Click to expand...


Spot-on!


----------



## Diana1180

Not sure what it means when I am perfectly happy with myself and am single but hey. 

Maybe I am just TOO awesome for the guys.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> Not sure what it means when I am perfectly happy with myself and am single but hey.
> 
> Maybe I am just TOO awesome for the guys.



Thats possible.


----------



## Mr. H.

Three of my siblings are single. I've often told them how I understand the difficulties and challenges of living the life of a single person, and then remind them they have no idea the difficulties and challenges of being married.


----------



## Diana1180

Mr. H. said:


> Three of my siblings are single. I've often told them how I understand the difficulties and challenges of living the life of a single person, and then remind them they have no idea the difficulties and challenges of being married.



In other words...the grass is not always greener on the other side


----------



## Disir

Mr. H. said:


> Three of my siblings are single. I've often told them how I understand the difficulties and challenges of living the life of a single person, and then remind them they have no idea the difficulties and challenges of being married.



I am single but not looking because I have been on both sides.  There really isn't a down side to being single.


----------



## High_Gravity

Disir said:


> Mr. H. said:
> 
> 
> 
> Three of my siblings are single. I've often told them how I understand the difficulties and challenges of living the life of a single person, and then remind them they have no idea the difficulties and challenges of being married.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I am single but not looking because I have been on both sides.  There really isn't a down side to being single.
Click to expand...


Single is easier and less stressful, I don't miss dreading going home because I got into a fight with my gf or whatever.


----------



## BDBoop

High_Gravity said:


> Disir said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Mr. H. said:
> 
> 
> 
> Three of my siblings are single. I've often told them how I understand the difficulties and challenges of living the life of a single person, and then remind them they have no idea the difficulties and challenges of being married.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I am single but not looking because I have been on both sides.  There really isn't a down side to being single.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Single is easier and less stressful, I don't miss dreading going home because I got into a fight with my gf or whatever.
Click to expand...


I don't miss waiting for the other shoe to drop. The silent treatment. The little digs that I turned a blind eye to because I loved him and was trying to give him more credit than he deserved, really.


----------



## High_Gravity

BDBoop said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Disir said:
> 
> 
> 
> I am single but not looking because I have been on both sides.  There really isn't a down side to being single.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Single is easier and less stressful, I don't miss dreading going home because I got into a fight with my gf or whatever.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I don't miss waiting for the other shoe to drop. The silent treatment. The little digs that I turned a blind eye to because I loved him and was trying to give him more credit than he deserved, really.
Click to expand...


Relationships sound like crap, so why do we have this drive to pursue relationships? I know I do, even if its just something casual.


----------



## High_Gravity

Ok so I'm registered in Meet up, I am part of a wine group here and a nightlife group, I'm going to look into others today.


----------



## Diana1180

High_Gravity said:


> BDBoop said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Single is easier and less stressful, I don't miss dreading going home because I got into a fight with my gf or whatever.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I don't miss waiting for the other shoe to drop. The silent treatment. The little digs that I turned a blind eye to because I loved him and was trying to give him more credit than he deserved, really.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Relationships sound like crap, so why do we have this drive to pursue relationships? I know I do, even if its just something casual.
Click to expand...


Because when they are good...they are real good.

Every relationship/ marriage/ partnership has their rough patches.

If the rough patches vastly outnumber the good times...then its not a relationship.


----------



## BDBoop

High_Gravity said:


> Ok so I'm registered in Meet up, I am part of a wine group here and a nightlife group, I'm going to look into others today.



Very cool!

My favorite one here is "Get Out, Get Social." 5144 members.


----------



## High_Gravity

BDBoop said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Ok so I'm registered in Meet up, I am part of a wine group here and a nightlife group, I'm going to look into others today.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Very cool!
> 
> My favorite one here is "Get Out, Get Social." 5144 members.
Click to expand...


I'll look for that one they have alot of different groups.


----------



## Disir

High_Gravity said:


> Disir said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Mr. H. said:
> 
> 
> 
> Three of my siblings are single. I've often told them how I understand the difficulties and challenges of living the life of a single person, and then remind them they have no idea the difficulties and challenges of being married.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I am single but not looking because I have been on both sides.  There really isn't a down side to being single.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Single is easier and less stressful, I don't miss dreading going home because I got into a fight with my gf or whatever.
Click to expand...


I agree.  It's less stressful all the way around.


----------



## Disir

BDBoop said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Disir said:
> 
> 
> 
> I am single but not looking because I have been on both sides.  There really isn't a down side to being single.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Single is easier and less stressful, I don't miss dreading going home because I got into a fight with my gf or whatever.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I don't miss waiting for the other shoe to drop. The silent treatment. The little digs that I turned a blind eye to because I loved him and was trying to give him more credit than he deserved, really.
Click to expand...


It's all BS, innit? 

Number one relationship killa: "What are you doing?" 

Number two relationship killa: "Where are you going?"

Number three relationship killa: "Where are you at?"

I guarantee you that if my response at any point indicates that I am using or going to use the restroom..........it's a wrap. The death knell of a quasi, semi-, possible relationship has sounded.


----------



## BDBoop

Disir said:


> BDBoop said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Single is easier and less stressful, I don't miss dreading going home because I got into a fight with my gf or whatever.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I don't miss waiting for the other shoe to drop. The silent treatment. The little digs that I turned a blind eye to because I loved him and was trying to give him more credit than he deserved, really.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> It's all BS, innit?
> 
> Number one relationship killa: "What are you doing?"
> 
> Number two relationship killa: "Where are you going?"
> 
> Number three relationship killa: "Where are you at?"
> 
> I guarantee you that if my response at any point indicates that I am using or going to use the restroom..........it's a wrap. The death knell of a quasi, semi-, possible relationship has sounded.
Click to expand...


One of my favorite sentences started "I let you ..." 

/tilt

"................... I'm sorry, you - you what!?"


----------



## Disir

Ewwe.....I let you. Ya.........

After thinking that one over, 

The number one relationship killa is now: "I let you....."


----------



## High_Gravity

Have we as humans outgrown the need for relationships?


----------



## Diana1180

High_Gravity said:


> Have we as humans outgrown the need for relationships?



Nope.

Or I should say....I hope not.


----------



## BDBoop

Yeah, I don't think so. I believe the vast majority of people want to be in a relationship, even if it's a bad one. I also believe more and more women are becoming aware that they deserve a good relationship, and they'd just as soon be single as be in a bad one. Some will remain in a bad relationship for whatever reason - not my life to live, but I can't imagine, personally. It feels like a slow death to me.


----------



## Wake

One thing I wonder about relationships is whether it's about looks and physique, or love and personality. I haven't been in a relationship with a young woman, but I'm worried she'll be attracted to me for my looks, and not for who I am. What's a young man to think?


----------



## pacer

Wake said:


> One thing I wonder about relationships is whether it's about looks and physique, or love and personality. I haven't been in a relationship with a young woman, but I'm worried she'll be attracted to me for my looks, and not for who I am. What's a young man to think?


You're joking, right?  Firstly, there is a difference between love and lust.  Secondly, what makes you think you're so hot?


----------



## Wake

pacer said:


> Wake said:
> 
> 
> 
> One thing I wonder about relationships is whether it's about looks and physique, or love and personality. I haven't been in a relationship with a young woman, but I'm worried she'll be attracted to me for my looks, and not for who I am. What's a young man to think?
> 
> 
> 
> You're joking, right?  Firstly, there is a difference between love and lust.  Secondly, what makes you think you're so hot?
Click to expand...


I know there's a difference between love and lust, but at times I worry if the woman I meet will like me because of true feelings, or because of lust. On the second part, I've been hit on by some women, but more in an unwanted way. It's not bragging, but just how it's been.


----------



## Diana1180

Wake said:


> One thing I wonder about relationships is whether it's about looks and physique, or love and personality. I haven't been in a relationship with a young woman, but I'm worried she'll be attracted to me for my looks, and not for who I am. What's a young man to think?



Lol. I am sure you didn't mean it but this came off as very cocky. 

It would be called "dating". You get to know the person and what their intentions are and what they are about. Hopefully you figure out whether they want your Einstein like mind or your Adonis body.


----------



## Statistikhengst

Diana1180 said:


> Wake said:
> 
> 
> 
> One thing I wonder about relationships is whether it's about looks and physique, or love and personality. I haven't been in a relationship with a young woman, but I'm worried she'll be attracted to me for my looks, and not for who I am. What's a young man to think?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Lol. I am sure you didn't mean it but this came off as very cocky.
> 
> It would be called "dating". You get to know the person and what their intentions are and what they are about. Hopefully you figure out whether they want your Einstein like mind or your Adonis body.
Click to expand...


----------



## High_Gravity

If you have money people are willing to overlook your faults lol.


----------



## earlycuyler

Wake said:


> One thing I wonder about relationships is whether it's about looks and physique, or love and personality. I haven't been in a relationship with a young woman, but I'm worried she'll be attracted to me for my looks, and not for who I am. What's a young man to think?



Whore. Thats all you are. Just a little slut.


----------



## High_Gravity

earlycuyler said:


> Wake said:
> 
> 
> 
> One thing I wonder about relationships is whether it's about looks and physique, or love and personality. I haven't been in a relationship with a young woman, but I'm worried she'll be attracted to me for my looks, and not for who I am. What's a young man to think?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Whore. Thats all you are. Just a little slut.
Click to expand...


----------



## Diana1180

High_Gravity said:


> If you have money people are willing to overlook your faults lol.



Contrary to popular belief (by men) .... This isn't true for everyone. Lol


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> If you have money people are willing to overlook your faults lol.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Contrary to popular belief (by men) .... This isn't true for everyone. Lol
Click to expand...


Women want security, Ive had plenty of my friends who are girls tell me if a guy has money they overlook certain things. I went out on a date with a girl my co workers set me up with, I thought everything went well but apparently not, than my co workers tell me she likes men with money and I'm like WTF, why set me up with her smgdh.


----------



## Diana1180

I look at security as a steady job, a roof over his head and food in his fridge. I make my own money and many times have made more than the guys I have dated.

If the guy has had 10 jobs in the past 2 yrs, and can't pay his own bills then yes, I want someone more "secure"

I already have a child to support lol.


----------



## AquaAthena

Diana1180 said:


> I look at security as a steady job, a roof over his head and food in his fridge. I make my own money and many times have made more than the guys I have dated.
> 
> If the guy has had 10 jobs in the past 2 yrs, and can't pay his own bills then yes, I want someone more "secure"
> 
> I already have a child to support lol.


----------



## Wake

That's one reason why I'm waiting until I'm done with nursing school.

CNAs/caregivers don't earn much money, and I don't think it'd be wise to commit to a serious relationship at this point. I don't want to be like my cousin, who's 3 years younger than me, has 3 kids, single, and isn't working. Definitely don't want to be in that position.


----------



## Diana1180

Personally I think dates that cost close to nothing are the most memorable. 

Just saying.


----------



## BDBoop

I just read the following truth: Being alone may scare you, but staying in a bad relationship damages you.


----------



## TheIceMan

BDBoop said:


> I just read the following truth: Being alone may scare you, but staying in a bad relationship damages you.



Should be my signature.


----------



## BDBoop

TheIceMan said:


> BDBoop said:
> 
> 
> 
> I just read the following truth: Being alone may scare you, but staying in a bad relationship damages you.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Should be my signature.
Click to expand...


Thanks to dear old mom (may she rest in peace) it's practically tattooed on my forehead.


----------



## Disir

High_Gravity said:


> Have we as humans outgrown the need for relationships?



It depends on the kind of relationships.  Romancy relationships?

The upper classes married for property and alliances.  The lower classes, if they married, did so for convenience. How much trouble can you be if you have all of these "responsibilities"?  So, maybe the better question is, "What purpose did they serve?" and "Whom did they serve?" along with What expectations do you have of relationships?


----------



## Disir

Wake said:


> One thing I wonder about relationships is whether it's about looks and physique, or love and personality. I haven't been in a relationship with a young woman, but I'm worried she'll be attracted to me for my looks, and not for who I am. What's a young man to think?



Considering your choice of career, it might be much worse.  You might need to find someone that is accustomed to having their minds blown on a daily basis or deals with the same level of intensity.  Unless, you have a 9-5 office job tucked away some where all lined up.


----------



## earlycuyler

So this lady I have been seeing pretty consistently has started calling me babe. And I like it. We will spend the weekend together after I get off work tomrrow. I find I got the jitters a bit.


----------



## Disir

Good on you!


----------



## earlycuyler

Disir said:


> Good on you!



Tamed the juggernaut beer. And stage off the phone. Blah. This is fun but its not. Blah.


----------



## Disir

You just going for the weekend.  What's a weekend?  May as well just get it over with.


----------



## High_Gravity

Well I think my managers daughter tried to ask me out Saturday, fuck my life.


----------



## Statistikhengst

High_Gravity said:


> Well I think my managers daughter tried to ask me out Saturday, fuck my life.





Well, send me her measurements and I let you know if it fucks your life or not.


----------



## High_Gravity

Statistikhengst said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Well I think my managers daughter tried to ask me out Saturday, fuck my life.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Well, send me her measurements and I let you know if it fucks your life or not.
Click to expand...


----------



## earlycuyler

High_Gravity said:


> Well I think my managers daughter tried to ask me out Saturday, fuck my life.



Well, thats not healthy for the career path man. So if you hit it and get it I would recommend having something else lined up. Or just say no.


----------



## earlycuyler

Disir said:


> You just going for the weekend.  What's a weekend?  May as well just get it over with.



Went good. Had a blast. Going to do it again this weekend.


----------



## Samson

High_Gravity said:


> Well I think my managers daughter tried to ask me out Saturday, fuck my life.



If she was not on her knees reaching for your zipper, you're good.

Otherwise you're probably exaggerating.


----------



## High_Gravity

Samson said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Well I think my managers daughter tried to ask me out Saturday, fuck my life.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> If she was not on her knees reaching for your zipper, you're good.
> 
> Otherwise you're probably exaggerating.
Click to expand...


I was supposed to drive her to this 5K Glorun on Saturday, well it got rained out. Than she text me and asked me to go out to dinner anyways, I lied and said I already had plans, whether she had other motives or not I'm not messing with it, too much could go wrong just by the appearance of it.


----------



## High_Gravity

earlycuyler said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Well I think my managers daughter tried to ask me out Saturday, fuck my life.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Well, thats not healthy for the career path man. So if you hit it and get it I would recommend having something else lined up. Or just say no.
Click to expand...


Yeah I'm not gonna do it, the atmosphere in this office is tense enough without adding that bs in there.


----------



## AquaAthena

High_Gravity said:


> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Well I think my managers daughter tried to ask me out Saturday, fuck my life.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Well, thats not healthy for the career path man. So if you hit it and get it I would recommend having something else lined up. Or just say no.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Yeah I'm not gonna do it, the atmosphere in this office is tense enough without adding that bs in there.
Click to expand...


Good thinking, if you like and want to keep your job.


----------



## High_Gravity

AquaAthena said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> Well, thats not healthy for the career path man. So if you hit it and get it I would recommend having something else lined up. Or just say no.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Yeah I'm not gonna do it, the atmosphere in this office is tense enough without adding that bs in there.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Good thinking, if you like and want to keep your job.
Click to expand...


Even if we did just go to an innocent dinner its the perception that could do more damage than the reality, I learned that in the Military.


----------



## Diana1180

Dont dip your pen in the company ink.

Especially if the company ink is the boss' daughters ...uh.."well".


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> Dont dip your pen in the company ink.
> 
> Especially if the company ink is the boss' daughters ...uh.."well".



I just don't know how I get myself in these situations, fml.


----------



## earlycuyler

I worked with a guy once who nailed our boss ex wife when she got papers. All of is told him to shut the hell up about it, but he did not. At some point she was bringing doode lunch and would make out in the parking lot. That did not end well for him.


----------



## earlycuyler

High_Gravity said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> Dont dip your pen in the company ink.
> 
> Especially if the company ink is the boss' daughters ...uh.."well".
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I just don't know how I get myself in these situations, fml.
Click to expand...


Some one must have farted. Smells like shit in here.


----------



## Samson

High_Gravity said:


> Samson said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Well I think my managers daughter tried to ask me out Saturday, fuck my life.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> If she was not on her knees reaching for your zipper, you're good.
> 
> Otherwise you're probably exaggerating.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I was supposed to drive her to this 5K Glorun on Saturday, well it got rained out. Than she text me and asked me to go out to dinner anyways, I lied and said I already had plans, whether she had other motives or not I'm not messing with it, too much could go wrong just by the appearance of it.
Click to expand...


Too bad.

You probably could have had a cherry coke and nice steak at Jackrabbit Slim's and won the dance contest.


----------



## earlycuyler

Samson said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Samson said:
> 
> 
> 
> If she was not on her knees reaching for your zipper, you're good.
> 
> Otherwise you're probably exaggerating.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I was supposed to drive her to this 5K Glorun on Saturday, well it got rained out. Than she text me and asked me to go out to dinner anyways, I lied and said I already had plans, whether she had other motives or not I'm not messing with it, too much could go wrong just by the appearance of it.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Too bad.
> 
> You probably could have had a cherry coke and nice steak at Jackrabbit Slim's and won the dance contest.
Click to expand...


Or got the clap.


----------



## Statistikhengst

earlycuyler said:


> Samson said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> I was supposed to drive her to this 5K Glorun on Saturday, well it got rained out. Than she text me and asked me to go out to dinner anyways, I lied and said I already had plans, whether she had other motives or not I'm not messing with it, too much could go wrong just by the appearance of it.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Too bad.
> 
> You probably could have had a cherry coke and nice steak at Jackrabbit Slim's and won the dance contest.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Or got the clap.
Click to expand...


Or two:


----------



## High_Gravity

Samson said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Samson said:
> 
> 
> 
> If she was not on her knees reaching for your zipper, you're good.
> 
> Otherwise you're probably exaggerating.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I was supposed to drive her to this 5K Glorun on Saturday, well it got rained out. Than she text me and asked me to go out to dinner anyways, I lied and said I already had plans, whether she had other motives or not I'm not messing with it, too much could go wrong just by the appearance of it.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Too bad.
> 
> You probably could have had a cherry coke and nice steak at Jackrabbit Slim's and won the dance contest.
Click to expand...


----------



## High_Gravity

earlycuyler said:


> Samson said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> I was supposed to drive her to this 5K Glorun on Saturday, well it got rained out. Than she text me and asked me to go out to dinner anyways, I lied and said I already had plans, whether she had other motives or not I'm not messing with it, too much could go wrong just by the appearance of it.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Too bad.
> 
> You probably could have had a cherry coke and nice steak at Jackrabbit Slim's and won the dance contest.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Or got the clap.
Click to expand...


Or gonorreah.


----------



## High_Gravity

earlycuyler said:


> I worked with a guy once who nailed our boss ex wife when she got papers. All of is told him to shut the hell up about it, but he did not. At some point she was bringing doode lunch and would make out in the parking lot. That did not end well for him.



How so?


----------



## earlycuyler

High_Gravity said:


> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> I worked with a guy once who nailed our boss ex wife when she got papers. All of is told him to shut the hell up about it, but he did not. At some point she was bringing doode lunch and would make out in the parking lot. That did not end well for him.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> How so?
Click to expand...


How did it not end well ? First off, we are all independant contractors out here and our jobs dont leave much room for screw ups. A simple slip and you stand a good chance of getting dead. That being the case, as dude carried on his drug tests became more frequent and his reviews got worse. About two months later he was told he would not be comeing back for the next shut down.  Then it all came to a head. When we finish one we all will normally have a cookout at the beach. We rent a beach house in Galveston and party all weekend and we also bring out signifigant others. We begged these two not to come, but they did. And they proceeded to chew eachothers faces and carry on until enough booze flowed and you know the rest. those two screwed our whole weekend and both of those guys will never work around these plants ever again.


----------



## earlycuyler

Oh, and im officially a boyfriend now. Met one who at this time is doing it for me, and she claims that I do it for her. She also shows cleavage all the time in how she dresses and thats just hawt considering she has huge boobs.


----------



## AquaAthena

earlycuyler said:


> Oh, and im officially a boyfriend now. Met one who at this time is doing it for me, and she claims that I do it for her. She also shows cleavage all the time in how she dresses and thats just hawt considering she has huge boobs.



Good on you! I like her already.    I like to show legs...Long, perfectly shaped legs.. ( Inherited some really hawt genes, including ample bosom  )


----------



## earlycuyler

AquaAthena said:


> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> Oh, and im officially a boyfriend now. Met one who at this time is doing it for me, and she claims that I do it for her. She also shows cleavage all the time in how she dresses and thats just hawt considering she has huge boobs.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Good on you! I like her already.    I like to show legs...Long, perfectly shaped legs.. ( Inherited some really hawt genes, including ample bosom  )
Click to expand...


Know what else is weird ? This one will call or text just to ask how my day is going. And she tried to bring me lunch once but port security would not let her in. And when she figured out exactly what I do, and where I do it at and how high up I do it she freaked. It was genuine concern. Pretty neat. So she understands why I dont respond when im working, and even manages to talk a decent amount of trash with my guys. Filthy mouth. Love it.


----------



## High_Gravity

earlycuyler said:


> Oh, and im officially a boyfriend now. Met one who at this time is doing it for me, and she claims that I do it for her. She also shows cleavage all the time in how she dresses and thats just hawt considering she has huge boobs.



Sounds good enjoy my friend.


----------



## AquaAthena

earlycuyler said:


> AquaAthena said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> Oh, and im officially a boyfriend now. Met one who at this time is doing it for me, and she claims that I do it for her. She also shows cleavage all the time in how she dresses and thats just hawt considering she has huge boobs.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Good on you! I like her already.    I like to show legs...Long, perfectly shaped legs.. ( Inherited some really hawt genes, including ample bosom  )
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Know what else is weird ? This one will call or text just to ask how my day is going. And she tried to bring me lunch once but port security would not let her in. And when she figured out exactly what I do, and where I do it at and how high up I do it she freaked. It was genuine concern. Pretty neat. So she understands why I dont respond when im working, and even manages to talk a decent amount of trash with my guys. Filthy mouth. Love it.
Click to expand...


Sounds good for you and I really hope it works out.   She sounds generous and you sound appreciative.


----------



## High_Gravity

Hopefully I'll get lucky like you bro lol.


----------



## Statistikhengst

earlycuyler said:


> Oh, and im officially a boyfriend now. Met one who at this time is doing it for me, and she claims that I do it for her. She also shows cleavage all the time in how she dresses and thats just hawt considering she has huge boobs.






big boobs = important.

Like. like. like. like.


----------



## earlycuyler

High_Gravity said:


> Hopefully I'll get lucky like you bro lol.



Lucky indeed. I do say I am enjoying my self. As for find in one, I was not looking. This just happened. We talked forever. You know what the say. " even a blind pig finds an acorn now and then".


----------



## earlycuyler

Statistikhengst said:


> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> Oh, and im officially a boyfriend now. Met one who at this time is doing it for me, and she claims that I do it for her. She also shows cleavage all the time in how she dresses and thats just hawt considering she has huge boobs.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> big boobs = important.
> 
> Like. like. like. like.
Click to expand...


The biggest natural boobs I have ever messed with. And there is more. She is actually pleasant to talk to. You can listen to what she is saying, and not have to be distracted by her boobs because its actually intresting to hear !


----------



## High_Gravity

earlycuyler said:


> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> Oh, and im officially a boyfriend now. Met one who at this time is doing it for me, and she claims that I do it for her. She also shows cleavage all the time in how she dresses and thats just hawt considering she has huge boobs.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> big boobs = important.
> 
> Like. like. like. like.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> The biggest natural boobs I have ever messed with. And there is more. She is actually pleasant to talk to. You can listen to what she is saying, and not have to be distracted by her boobs because its actually intresting to hear !
Click to expand...


Braggart


----------



## High_Gravity

Where did you meet her btw don't meant to be nosy, just curious.


----------



## Diana1180

earlycuyler said:


> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> Oh, and im officially a boyfriend now. Met one who at this time is doing it for me, and she claims that I do it for her. She also shows cleavage all the time in how she dresses and thats just hawt considering she has huge boobs.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> big boobs = important.
> 
> Like. like. like. like.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> The biggest natural boobs I have ever messed with. And there is more. She is actually pleasant to talk to. You can listen to what she is saying, and not have to be distracted by her boobs because its actually intresting to hear !
Click to expand...


Aaaah the trifecta.  Big boobs, interesting to talk to...AND listen to.


----------



## Unkotare

TheIceMan said:


> BDBoop said:
> 
> 
> 
> I just read the following truth: Being alone may scare you, but staying in a bad relationship damages you.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Should be my signature.
Click to expand...




Got that rash on your hand again?


----------



## Unkotare

earlycuyler said:


> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> Oh, and im officially a boyfriend now. Met one who at this time is doing it for me, and she claims that I do it for her. She also shows cleavage all the time in how she dresses and thats just hawt considering she has huge boobs.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> big boobs = important.
> 
> Like. like. like. like.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> The biggest natural boobs I have ever messed with. And there is more. She is actually pleasant to talk to. You can listen to what she is saying, and not have to be distracted by her boobs because its actually intresting to hear !
Click to expand...




Sounds like the breast of both worlds. Good for all four of you.


----------



## High_Gravity

Still here still single.


----------



## AquaAthena

High_Gravity said:


> Still here still single.



mmm...that may be a blessing in disguise??


----------



## earlycuyler

High_Gravity said:


> Still here still single.



Still with the same one.


----------



## High_Gravity

AquaAthena said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Still here still single.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> mmm...that may be a blessing in disguise??
Click to expand...


I don't know about a blessing, I just think I just have too much going on to really be in a relationship right now. My old fwb's best friend asked me out Saturday, I thought about it over the weekend and decided to turn her down, this could get too messy for me.


----------



## High_Gravity

earlycuyler said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Still here still single.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Still with the same one.
Click to expand...


Enjoy my friend.


----------



## earlycuyler

High_Gravity said:


> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Still here still single.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Still with the same one.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Enjoy my friend.
Click to expand...


I am. This weekend me and the daughter are are going to west Texas for hiking and hunting.


----------



## Unkotare

High_Gravity said:


> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Still here still single.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Still with the same one.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Enjoy my friend.
Click to expand...



You're gonna set him up with your friend? I dunno, sounds like he's got his hands full as it is! 




Then again, three's company too!


----------



## Unkotare

High_Gravity said:


> AquaAthena said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Still here still single.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> mmm...that may be a blessing in disguise??
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I don't know about a blessing, I just think I just have too much going on to really be in a relationship right now. My old fwb's best friend asked me out Saturday, I thought about it over the weekend and decided to turn her down, this could get too messy for me.
Click to expand...



The key is to put a tarp over the furniture before you break out the whipped cream.


----------



## earlycuyler

High_Gravity said:


> AquaAthena said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Still here still single.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> mmm...that may be a blessing in disguise??
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I don't know about a blessing, I just think I just have too much going on to really be in a relationship right now. My old fwb's best friend asked me out Saturday, I thought about it over the weekend and decided to turn her down, this could get too messy for me.
Click to expand...


sometimes its just nice to sit and eat with someone. Nothing says you have to do anything other then enjoy eachothers company.


----------



## High_Gravity

Unkotare said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> Still with the same one.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Enjoy my friend.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> 
> You're gonna set him up with your friend? I dunno, sounds like he's got his hands full as it is!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Then again, three's company too!
Click to expand...


----------



## High_Gravity

earlycuyler said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> AquaAthena said:
> 
> 
> 
> mmm...that may be a blessing in disguise??
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I don't know about a blessing, I just think I just have too much going on to really be in a relationship right now. My old fwb's best friend asked me out Saturday, I thought about it over the weekend and decided to turn her down, this could get too messy for me.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> sometimes its just nice to sit and eat with someone. Nothing says you have to do anything other then enjoy eachothers company.
Click to expand...


I agree 100%.


----------



## Statistikhengst

Diana1180 said:


> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> big boobs = important.
> 
> Like. like. like. like.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> The biggest natural boobs I have ever messed with. And there is more. She is actually pleasant to talk to. You can listen to what she is saying, and not have to be distracted by her boobs because its actually intresting to hear !
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Aaaah the trifecta.  Big boobs, interesting to talk to...AND listen to.
Click to expand...


Dear Lord, how could I have missed a post about big boobs..... must be just tired and unconcentrated lately... hmmm....


----------



## earlycuyler

Statistikhengst said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> The biggest natural boobs I have ever messed with. And there is more. She is actually pleasant to talk to. You can listen to what she is saying, and not have to be distracted by her boobs because its actually intresting to hear !
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Aaaah the trifecta.  Big boobs, interesting to talk to...AND listen to.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Dear Lord, how could I have missed a post about big boobs..... must be just tired and unconcentrated lately... hmmm....
Click to expand...


yes. The boobs are awesome. Bettsr then I deserve. Naturel extolled awesome. Need to stop and watch this safety vedio. Hard to do all tingly and shit.


----------



## Statistikhengst




----------



## Diana1180

High_Gravity said:


> Still here still single.



Same here... lol

Had a date.  Guy bought me flowers.  complimented me all night.  At the end, asked when he could see me again.

crickets.

Getting to be a pattern.

But... had a few awesome Girls Night Outs.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Still here still single.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Same here... lol
> 
> Had a date.  Guy bought me flowers.  complimented me all night.  At the end, asked when he could see me again.
> 
> crickets.
> 
> Getting to be a pattern.
> 
> But... had a few awesome Girls Night Outs.
Click to expand...


I hooked up with a girl last Thursday, she came over, we had sex, she left, never heard from her again. Turns out she has a boyfriend and their pretty into each other, why she slept with me I have no idea. It honestly feels like a dream, like it didn't even happen. I can pull the occasional lay hat trick, but as far as finding something meaningful I am lost and have no clue how to do it. I have met women at wine tasting events and other meet ups and had good conversations, exchanged numbers, and than absolutely nothing happens, I can't call it.


----------



## High_Gravity

BTW I did the flowers thing once on a first date, never again. I think it intimidated the girl.


----------



## Diana1180

High_Gravity said:


> BTW I did the flowers thing once on a first date, never again. I think it intimidated the girl.



I love flowers on the first date lol.  It was surprising to get them...and sweet.

Sad that flowers are "intimidating".

Oh hey..I will be in your neck of the woods next week for work lol.


----------



## Statistikhengst

Diana1180 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> BTW I did the flowers thing once on a first date, never again. I think it intimidated the girl.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I love flowers on the first date lol.  It was surprising to get them...and sweet.
> 
> Sad that flowers are "intimidating".
> 
> Oh hey..I will be in your neck of the woods next week for work lol.
Click to expand...



I love bringing a lady some nice flowers.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> BTW I did the flowers thing once on a first date, never again. I think it intimidated the girl.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I love flowers on the first date lol.  It was surprising to get them...and sweet.
> 
> Sad that flowers are "intimidating".
> 
> Oh hey..I will be in your neck of the woods next week for work lol.
Click to expand...


Women say they like flowers on the first date but it tends to freak them out, best to just be casual on the first date. Flowers is for when you are already seeing each other, will you be in Richmond?


----------



## High_Gravity

Statistikhengst said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> BTW I did the flowers thing once on a first date, never again. I think it intimidated the girl.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I love flowers on the first date lol.  It was surprising to get them...and sweet.
> 
> Sad that flowers are "intimidating".
> 
> Oh hey..I will be in your neck of the woods next week for work lol.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> 
> I love bringing a lady some nice flowers.
Click to expand...


I did too but never again, at least on the first date.


----------



## Diana1180

High_Gravity said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> BTW I did the flowers thing once on a first date, never again. I think it intimidated the girl.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I love flowers on the first date lol.  It was surprising to get them...and sweet.
> 
> Sad that flowers are "intimidating".
> 
> Oh hey..I will be in your neck of the woods next week for work lol.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Women say they like flowers on the first date but it tends to freak them out, best to just be casual on the first date. Flowers is for when you are already seeing each other, will you be in Richmond?
Click to expand...


I think it depends.  I was flattered.  But I could also tell this guy was a bit of an old soul.  He asked to pick me up, made reservations and brought flowers.

Basically unheard of in this day.   (sadly)

I will be between Crystal City and downtown DC.  And I just noticed your in Richmond...so maybe not quite your neck of the woods.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> I love flowers on the first date lol.  It was surprising to get them...and sweet.
> 
> Sad that flowers are "intimidating".
> 
> Oh hey..I will be in your neck of the woods next week for work lol.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Women say they like flowers on the first date but it tends to freak them out, best to just be casual on the first date. Flowers is for when you are already seeing each other, will you be in Richmond?
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I think it depends.  I was flattered.  But I could also tell this guy was a bit of an old soul.  He asked to pick me up, made reservations and brought flowers.
> 
> Basically unheard of in this day.   (sadly)
> 
> I will be between Crystal City and downtown DC.  And I just noticed your in Richmond...so maybe not quite your neck of the woods.
Click to expand...


DC is about an hour and a half, I was gonna ask if you wanted to get brunch or something lol, but anyways yeah all that stuff doesn't work anymore. If you roll out the red carpet for a woman on the first date she will freak out and friend zone you, if you act aloof and uninterested she will sleep with you lol.


----------



## Diana1180

High_Gravity said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Women say they like flowers on the first date but it tends to freak them out, best to just be casual on the first date. Flowers is for when you are already seeing each other, will you be in Richmond?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I think it depends.  I was flattered.  But I could also tell this guy was a bit of an old soul.  He asked to pick me up, made reservations and brought flowers.
> 
> Basically unheard of in this day.   (sadly)
> 
> I will be between Crystal City and downtown DC.  And I just noticed your in Richmond...so maybe not quite your neck of the woods.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> DC is about an hour and a half, I was gonna ask if you wanted to get brunch or something lol, but anyways yeah all that stuff doesn't work anymore. If you roll out the red carpet for a woman on the first date she will freak out and friend zone you, if you act aloof and uninterested she will sleep with you lol.
Click to expand...


lol...brunch..is that at like 10am or 11am?  Or is it after lunch?

Aloof and uninterested gets you friend zoned quicker with me.  I will not chase anyone.  If you act aloof and uninterested then I will assume you are not interested and not put in any effort.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> I think it depends.  I was flattered.  But I could also tell this guy was a bit of an old soul.  He asked to pick me up, made reservations and brought flowers.
> 
> Basically unheard of in this day.   (sadly)
> 
> I will be between Crystal City and downtown DC.  And I just noticed your in Richmond...so maybe not quite your neck of the woods.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> DC is about an hour and a half, I was gonna ask if you wanted to get brunch or something lol, but anyways yeah all that stuff doesn't work anymore. If you roll out the red carpet for a woman on the first date she will freak out and friend zone you, if you act aloof and uninterested she will sleep with you lol.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> lol...brunch..is that at like 10am or 11am?  Or is it after lunch?
> 
> Aloof and uninterested gets you friend zoned quicker with me.  I will not chase anyone.  If you act aloof and uninterested then I will assume you are not interested and not put in any effort.
Click to expand...


I thought brunch was breakfast for lunch lol, I have heard people say that and what you are saying is logical and makes sense but in practice you would be surprised how women react. Women are not interested in the guys that are too eager and too easy, women are more attracted to challenging men.


----------



## Diana1180

ok, maybe I am doing it all wrong.

So if you are interested in a girl and you go  on a date and have a great time and both express the desire for a second date. (No sex)  Are you going to do that stupid 3 day rule and not call her because you are trying to be aloof?


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> ok, maybe I am doing it all wrong.
> 
> So if you are interested in a girl and you go  on a date and have a great time and both express the desire for a second date. (No sex)  Are you going to do that stupid 3 day rule and not call her because you are trying to be aloof?



I wait like a day, and mostly people text me now smh, I haven't called a girl outright in years until we saw each other more than once.


----------



## Diana1180

High_Gravity said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> ok, maybe I am doing it all wrong.
> 
> So if you are interested in a girl and you go  on a date and have a great time and both express the desire for a second date. (No sex)  Are you going to do that stupid 3 day rule and not call her because you are trying to be aloof?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I wait like a day, and mostly people text me now smh, I haven't called a girl outright in years until we saw each other more than once.
Click to expand...


I think I was born in the wrong generation....


----------



## AquaAthena

High_Gravity said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> ok, maybe I am doing it all wrong.
> 
> So if you are interested in a girl and you go  on a date and have a great time and both express the desire for a second date. (No sex)  Are you going to do that stupid 3 day rule and not call her because you are trying to be aloof?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I wait like a day, and mostly people text me now smh, I haven't called a girl outright in years until we saw each other more than once.
Click to expand...


Interesting. 

To this day, I would never call a guy in the beginning of a courtship nor would I accept a date request via text.  

I am very hard to get. I don't play it. I _am_ it.  The more effort he puts into me, the more I like it.  And that means, _voice time_, on a phone call.  And a follow up call right after the first date. I like when a man is the pursuer and I know how to let him know if I am no longer interested, without offending him.  I care about people's feelings if I care about _them._


----------



## High_Gravity

AquaAthena said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> ok, maybe I am doing it all wrong.
> 
> So if you are interested in a girl and you go  on a date and have a great time and both express the desire for a second date. (No sex)  Are you going to do that stupid 3 day rule and not call her because you are trying to be aloof?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I wait like a day, and mostly people text me now smh, I haven't called a girl outright in years until we saw each other more than once.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Interesting.
> 
> To this day, I would never call a guy in the beginning of a courtship nor would I accept a date request via text.
> 
> I am very hard to get. I don't play it. I _am_ it.  The more effort he puts into me, the more I like it.  And that means, _voice time_, on a phone call.  And a follow up call right after the first date. I like when a man is the pursuer and I know how to let him know if I am no longer interested, without offending him.  I care about people's feelings if I care about _them._
Click to expand...


See thats the total opposite of the women I have encountered, I am 32 and I mainly deal with women in their 20s and early 30s, this is how they are.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> ok, maybe I am doing it all wrong.
> 
> So if you are interested in a girl and you go  on a date and have a great time and both express the desire for a second date. (No sex)  Are you going to do that stupid 3 day rule and not call her because you are trying to be aloof?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I wait like a day, and mostly people text me now smh, I haven't called a girl outright in years until we saw each other more than once.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I think I was born in the wrong generation....
Click to expand...


I mean I don't like how things are, I'm just playing the hand I am dealt.


----------



## Diana1180

High_Gravity said:


> AquaAthena said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> I wait like a day, and mostly people text me now smh, I haven't called a girl outright in years until we saw each other more than once.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Interesting.
> 
> To this day, I would never call a guy in the beginning of a courtship nor would I accept a date request via text.
> 
> I am very hard to get. I don't play it. I _am_ it.  The more effort he puts into me, the more I like it.  And that means, _voice time_, on a phone call.  And a follow up call right after the first date. I like when a man is the pursuer and I know how to let him know if I am no longer interested, without offending him.  I care about people's feelings if I care about _them._
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> See thats the total opposite of the women I have encountered, I am 32 and I mainly deal with women in their 20s and early 30s, this is how they are.
Click to expand...


And I am only 37.  I dont expect to have attention 24/7 but showing that youre interested in me is a plus lol.  If you only text me, go days without contact or I feel like I am the one always trying to make plans....I move on.


----------



## earlycuyler

High_Gravity said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Still here still single.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Same here... lol
> 
> Had a date.  Guy bought me flowers.  complimented me all night.  At the end, asked when he could see me again.
> 
> crickets.
> 
> Getting to be a pattern.
> 
> But... had a few awesome Girls Night Outs.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I hooked up with a girl last Thursday, she came over, we had sex, she left, never heard from her again. Turns out she has a boyfriend and their pretty into each other, why she slept with me I have no idea. It honestly feels like a dream, like it didn't even happen. I can pull the occasional lay hat trick, but as far as finding something meaningful I am lost and have no clue how to do it. I have met women at wine tasting events and other meet ups and had good conversations, exchanged numbers, and than absolutely nothing happens, I can't call it.
Click to expand...


You never can call it. Just have fun man. Shit rattles out how it does when it does. After my busy time at work, im going to Arizona with the girl I have been seeing and her kid. This weekend im in Lubbock with her and her family.


----------



## AquaAthena

High_Gravity said:


> AquaAthena said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> I wait like a day, and mostly people text me now smh, I haven't called a girl outright in years until we saw each other more than once.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Interesting.
> 
> To this day, I would never call a guy in the beginning of a courtship nor would I accept a date request via text.
> 
> I am very hard to get. I don't play it. I _am_ it.  The more effort he puts into me, the more I like it.  And that means, _voice time_, on a phone call.  And a follow up call right after the first date. I like when a man is the pursuer and I know how to let him know if I am no longer interested, without offending him.  I care about people's feelings if I care about _them._
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> See thats the total opposite of the women I have encountered, I am 32 and I mainly deal with women in their 20s and early 30s, this is how they are.
Click to expand...


I've been told by boys/ men since I was 14, how different I am.  I used to take that as awful because most young teens like to be like other teens, then at 26 it dawned on me it had, and was still, being used as a compliment. Whew!!!  Some lessons take a while and are learned the hard way. Maybe more appreciated than ever because of that, though?


----------



## Diana1180

High_Gravity said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> I wait like a day, and mostly people text me now smh, I haven't called a girl outright in years until we saw each other more than once.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I think I was born in the wrong generation....
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I mean I don't like how things are, I'm just playing the hand I am dealt.
Click to expand...


But you dont have to play with that hand.  Deal your own cards.

If you want a woman who likes alot of attention, likes flowers etc (because thats what is in your nature) then wait for that woman.  Dont play the game. Just be yourself.


----------



## AquaAthena

earlycuyler said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> Same here... lol
> 
> Had a date.  Guy bought me flowers.  complimented me all night.  At the end, asked when he could see me again.
> 
> crickets.
> 
> Getting to be a pattern.
> 
> But... had a few awesome Girls Night Outs.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I hooked up with a girl last Thursday, she came over, we had sex, she left, never heard from her again. Turns out she has a boyfriend and their pretty into each other, why she slept with me I have no idea. It honestly feels like a dream, like it didn't even happen. I can pull the occasional lay hat trick, but as far as finding something meaningful I am lost and have no clue how to do it. I have met women at wine tasting events and other meet ups and had good conversations, exchanged numbers, and than absolutely nothing happens, I can't call it.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> You never can call it. Just have fun man. Shit rattles out how it does when it does. After my busy time at work, im going to Arizona with the girl I have been seeing and her kid. This weekend im in Lubbock with her and her family.
Click to expand...


That is the best news.  I am loving your new life.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> AquaAthena said:
> 
> 
> 
> Interesting.
> 
> To this day, I would never call a guy in the beginning of a courtship nor would I accept a date request via text.
> 
> I am very hard to get. I don't play it. I _am_ it.  The more effort he puts into me, the more I like it.  And that means, _voice time_, on a phone call.  And a follow up call right after the first date. I like when a man is the pursuer and I know how to let him know if I am no longer interested, without offending him.  I care about people's feelings if I care about _them._
> 
> 
> 
> 
> See thats the total opposite of the women I have encountered, I am 32 and I mainly deal with women in their 20s and early 30s, this is how they are.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> And I am only 37.  I dont expect to have attention 24/7 but showing that youre interested in me is a plus lol.  If you only text me, go days without contact or I feel like I am the one always trying to make plans....I move on.
Click to expand...


Most women I encounter just seem to want to take things "casual", whatever the hell that means.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> I think I was born in the wrong generation....
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I mean I don't like how things are, I'm just playing the hand I am dealt.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> But you dont have to play with that hand.  Deal your own cards.
> 
> If you want a woman who likes alot of attention, likes flowers etc (because thats what is in your nature) then wait for that woman.  Dont play the game. Just be yourself.
Click to expand...


I think that woman is in a more conservative country like Korea lol!


----------



## High_Gravity

earlycuyler said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> Same here... lol
> 
> Had a date.  Guy bought me flowers.  complimented me all night.  At the end, asked when he could see me again.
> 
> crickets.
> 
> Getting to be a pattern.
> 
> But... had a few awesome Girls Night Outs.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I hooked up with a girl last Thursday, she came over, we had sex, she left, never heard from her again. Turns out she has a boyfriend and their pretty into each other, why she slept with me I have no idea. It honestly feels like a dream, like it didn't even happen. I can pull the occasional lay hat trick, but as far as finding something meaningful I am lost and have no clue how to do it. I have met women at wine tasting events and other meet ups and had good conversations, exchanged numbers, and than absolutely nothing happens, I can't call it.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> You never can call it. Just have fun man. Shit rattles out how it does when it does. After my busy time at work, im going to Arizona with the girl I have been seeing and her kid. This weekend im in Lubbock with her and her family.
Click to expand...


I am happy for you my dude.


----------



## Statistikhengst

earlycuyler said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> Same here... lol
> 
> Had a date.  Guy bought me flowers.  complimented me all night.  At the end, asked when he could see me again.
> 
> crickets.
> 
> Getting to be a pattern.
> 
> But... had a few awesome Girls Night Outs.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I hooked up with a girl last Thursday, she came over, we had sex, she left, never heard from her again. Turns out she has a boyfriend and their pretty into each other, why she slept with me I have no idea. It honestly feels like a dream, like it didn't even happen. I can pull the occasional lay hat trick, but as far as finding something meaningful I am lost and have no clue how to do it. I have met women at wine tasting events and other meet ups and had good conversations, exchanged numbers, and than absolutely nothing happens, I can't call it.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> You never can call it. Just have fun man. Shit rattles out how it does when it does. After my busy time at work, im going to Arizona with the girl I have been seeing and her kid. This weekend im in Lubbock with her and her family.
Click to expand...


----------



## Diana1180

High_Gravity said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> See thats the total opposite of the women I have encountered, I am 32 and I mainly deal with women in their 20s and early 30s, this is how they are.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> And I am only 37.  I dont expect to have attention 24/7 but showing that youre interested in me is a plus lol.  If you only text me, go days without contact or I feel like I am the one always trying to make plans....I move on.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Most women I encounter just seem to want to take things "casual", whatever the hell that means.
Click to expand...


Funny...most of the men I meet just want something "casual".  Which means they only want to call you when they are horny.  Thankfully those are easy to spot.


----------



## AquaAthena

Diana1180 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> I think I was born in the wrong generation....
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I mean I don't like how things are, I'm just playing the hand I am dealt.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> But you dont have to play with that hand.  Deal your own cards.
> 
> If you want a woman who likes alot of attention, likes flowers etc (because thats what is in your nature) then wait for that woman.  Dont play the game. Just be yourself.
Click to expand...


Sound advice. 

I always say, I play the hand I have dealt myself.  That is because I accept responsibility for my life and hold only myself accountable. My life is up to_ me. _


----------



## earlycuyler

AquaAthena said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> ok, maybe I am doing it all wrong.
> 
> So if you are interested in a girl and you go  on a date and have a great time and both express the desire for a second date. (No sex)  Are you going to do that stupid 3 day rule and not call her because you are trying to be aloof?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I wait like a day, and mostly people text me now smh, I haven't called a girl outright in years until we saw each other more than once.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Interesting.
> 
> To this day, I would never call a guy in the beginning of a courtship nor would I accept a date request via text.
> 
> I am very hard to get. I don't play it. I _am_ it.  The more effort he puts into me, the more I like it.  And that means, _voice time_, on a phone call.  And a follow up call right after the first date. I like when a man is the pursuer and I know how to let him know if I am no longer interested, without offending him.  I care about people's feelings if I care about _them._
Click to expand...


Damn right. If your into someone the least you can do is call them, or better yet say it to there face.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> And I am only 37.  I dont expect to have attention 24/7 but showing that youre interested in me is a plus lol.  If you only text me, go days without contact or I feel like I am the one always trying to make plans....I move on.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Most women I encounter just seem to want to take things "casual", whatever the hell that means.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Funny...most of the men I meet just want something "casual".  Which means they only want to call you when they are horny.  Thankfully those are easy to spot.
Click to expand...


"Casual" is the new word of the day lol, but the funny thing is these same women complain that these same casual men won't commit lol, but the guy who wants is left in the dog house, funny how that works.


----------



## Diana1180

High_Gravity said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Most women I encounter just seem to want to take things "casual", whatever the hell that means.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Funny...most of the men I meet just want something "casual".  Which means they only want to call you when they are horny.  Thankfully those are easy to spot.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> "Casual" is the new word of the day lol, but the funny thing is these same women complain that these same casual men won't commit lol, but the guy who wants is left in the dog house, funny how that works.
Click to expand...


Its a vicious cycle lol.

Which is why I stay single.


----------



## earlycuyler

High_Gravity said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Most women I encounter just seem to want to take things "casual", whatever the hell that means.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Funny...most of the men I meet just want something "casual".  Which means they only want to call you when they are horny.  Thankfully those are easy to spot.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> "Casual" is the new word of the day lol, but the funny thing is these same women complain that these same casual men won't commit lol, but the guy who wants is left in the dog house, funny how that works.
Click to expand...


Face it dude, chicks are bat shit crazy, but we have to deal with them because they got what we want. Remaining aloof has worked for me so far. Try that.


----------



## Diana1180

Hey.  We arent ALL crazy lol.


----------



## Statistikhengst

Diana1180 said:


> Hey.  We arent ALL crazy lol.




I am glad to know that.

Whew!


----------



## Diana1180

Statistikhengst said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> Hey.  We arent ALL crazy lol.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I am glad to know that.
> 
> Whew!
Click to expand...


I took my meds today... we are fine.


----------



## Andylusion

Diana1180 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> Funny...most of the men I meet just want something "casual".  Which means they only want to call you when they are horny.  Thankfully those are easy to spot.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> "Casual" is the new word of the day lol, but the funny thing is these same women complain that these same casual men won't commit lol, but the guy who wants is left in the dog house, funny how that works.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Its a vicious cycle lol.
> 
> Which is why I stay single.
Click to expand...


Exactly.   Single is the way to be.


----------



## High_Gravity

earlycuyler said:


> AquaAthena said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> I wait like a day, and mostly people text me now smh, I haven't called a girl outright in years until we saw each other more than once.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Interesting.
> 
> To this day, I would never call a guy in the beginning of a courtship nor would I accept a date request via text.
> 
> I am very hard to get. I don't play it. I _am_ it.  The more effort he puts into me, the more I like it.  And that means, _voice time_, on a phone call.  And a follow up call right after the first date. I like when a man is the pursuer and I know how to let him know if I am no longer interested, without offending him.  I care about people's feelings if I care about _them._
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Damn right. If your into someone the least you can do is call them, or better yet say it to there face.
Click to expand...


From my experience that is the worst thing you can do.


----------



## High_Gravity

earlycuyler said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> Funny...most of the men I meet just want something "casual".  Which means they only want to call you when they are horny.  Thankfully those are easy to spot.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> "Casual" is the new word of the day lol, but the funny thing is these same women complain that these same casual men won't commit lol, but the guy who wants is left in the dog house, funny how that works.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Face it dude, chicks are bat shit crazy, but we have to deal with them because they got what we want. *Remaining aloof has worked for me so far. Try that*.
Click to expand...


Thats what I'm doing pretty much.


----------



## Diana1180

High_Gravity said:


> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> "Casual" is the new word of the day lol, but the funny thing is these same women complain that these same casual men won't commit lol, but the guy who wants is left in the dog house, funny how that works.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Face it dude, chicks are bat shit crazy, but we have to deal with them because they got what we want. *Remaining aloof has worked for me so far. Try that*.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Thats what I'm doing pretty much.
Click to expand...


And hows it working for ya?

I mean other than the hook ups....


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> Face it dude, chicks are bat shit crazy, but we have to deal with them because they got what we want. *Remaining aloof has worked for me so far. Try that*.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Thats what I'm doing pretty much.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> And hows it working for ya?
> 
> I mean other than the hook ups....
Click to expand...


So/so, get laid every month or so but nothing meaningful, the thing is last time I tried to actually date a girl and show interest, brought flowers, paid for the meal etc she ended up friend zoning me and I was pissed, I thought we had chemistry and looked good together but shes not for me. I promised myself that would never happen again.


----------



## Andylusion

High_Gravity said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Thats what I'm doing pretty much.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> And hows it working for ya?
> 
> I mean other than the hook ups....
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> So/so, get laid every month or so but nothing meaningful, the thing is last time I tried to actually date a girl and show interest, brought flowers, paid for the meal etc she ended up friend zoning me and I was pissed, I thought we had chemistry and looked good together but shes not for me. I promised myself that would never happen again.
Click to expand...


I'm not sure that's a good take away.    Yeah, it hurt to do that and end up finding out she wasn't interested.

But saying that you are not going to try for the right kind of relationship, just means you'll end up with the empty meaningless relationship forever.

The good things in life are hard.  No one got to a good place, without going through the difficult and challenging parts, and I wager that Marriage with a good woman, is no different.

If the really good stuff in life was all easy, and painless, everyone would have million dollar homes, six-figure incomes, and absolutely wonderful marriages.   Right?


----------



## WelfareQueen

High_Gravity said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> Thats what I'm doing pretty much.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> And hows it working for ya?
> 
> I mean other than the hook ups....
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> So/so, get laid every month or so but nothing meaningful, the thing is last time I tried to actually date a girl and show interest, brought flowers, paid for the meal etc she ended up friend zoning me and I was pissed, I thought we had chemistry and looked good together but shes not for me. I promised myself that would never happen again.
Click to expand...



I'm newly single HG (about 8 months).  Wasn't really looking and an amazing woman came into my life.  Keep the faith....you never know.


----------



## High_Gravity

Androw said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> And hows it working for ya?
> 
> I mean other than the hook ups....
> 
> 
> 
> 
> So/so, get laid every month or so but nothing meaningful, the thing is last time I tried to actually date a girl and show interest, brought flowers, paid for the meal etc she ended up friend zoning me and I was pissed, I thought we had chemistry and looked good together but shes not for me. I promised myself that would never happen again.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I'm not sure that's a good take away.    Yeah, it hurt to do that and end up finding out she wasn't interested.
> 
> But saying that you are not going to try for the right kind of relationship, just means you'll end up with the empty meaningless relationship forever.
> 
> The good things in life are hard.  No one got to a good place, without going through the difficult and challenging parts, and I wager that Marriage with a good woman, is no different.
> 
> If the really good stuff in life was all easy, and painless, everyone would have million dollar homes, six-figure incomes, and absolutely wonderful marriages.   Right?
Click to expand...


You are right, its just that when you put yourself out there for another person you make yourself vulnerable, its just so risky. I'm not saying I'll never do it again but I'd like to at least know the other person is at least interested, but unfortunately its never that easy people are rarely upfront about their feelings.


----------



## AyeCantSeeYou

High_Gravity said:


> You are right, its just that when you put yourself out there for another person you make yourself vulnerable, its just so risky. I'm not saying I'll never do it again but I'd like to at least know the other person is at least interested, but unfortunately its never that easy people are rarely upfront about their feelings.



That's true. I no longer put myself out there because of being hurt too many times. Every person has a breaking point, and when they hit it, they give up. (Which is what I've done.) I'd rather be single than be someone else's doormat any day! It really isn't worth it.


----------



## Diana1180

I keep saying I give up...but I never do lol.

I continue to go on dates when asked but I am very gaurded.  I have no problem being single..and as Aye said.. i would rather be single ..than settling.  

Someday that ever elusize honest and charming guy will come along.  ;-)


----------



## AyeCantSeeYou

Diana1180 said:


> I keep saying I give up...but I never do lol.
> 
> I continue to go on dates when asked but I am very gaurded.  I have no problem being single..and as Aye said.. i would rather be single ..than settling.
> 
> *Someday that ever elusize honest and charming guy will come along.*  ;-)



those only exist in fairy tales and stupid love songs - which all lie.


----------



## WelfareQueen

AyeCantSeeYou said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> You are right, its just that when you put yourself out there for another person you make yourself vulnerable, its just so risky. I'm not saying I'll never do it again but I'd like to at least know the other person is at least interested, but unfortunately its never that easy people are rarely upfront about their feelings.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> That's true. I no longer put myself out there because of being hurt too many times. Every person has a breaking point, and when they hit it, they give up. (Which is what I've done.) I'd rather be single than be someone else's doormat any day! It really isn't worth it.
Click to expand...




Aye....


I say this as a friend....not grooving.....


You are a beautiful woman.  To the extent I know you, any man would be lucky to have you in their life.  Your choice how you want to proceed....but you are as deserving of love as anyone.  And you should never have to be anyone's doormat.  EVER.


----------



## Diana1180

AyeCantSeeYou said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> I keep saying I give up...but I never do lol.
> 
> I continue to go on dates when asked but I am very gaurded.  I have no problem being single..and as Aye said.. i would rather be single ..than settling.
> 
> *Someday that ever elusize honest and charming guy will come along.*  ;-)
> 
> 
> 
> 
> those only exist in fairy tales and stupid love songs - which all lie.
Click to expand...


Dont burst my fantasy bubble damn it!  ;-)


----------



## WelfareQueen

Diana1180 said:


> AyeCantSeeYou said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> I keep saying I give up...but I never do lol.
> 
> I continue to go on dates when asked but I am very gaurded.  I have no problem being single..and as Aye said.. i would rather be single ..than settling.
> 
> *Someday that ever elusize honest and charming guy will come along.*  ;-)
> 
> 
> 
> 
> those only exist in fairy tales and stupid love songs - which all lie.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Dont burst my fantasy bubble damn it!  ;-)
Click to expand...



There are many good men out there...just as there are women.  All of these issues (Children, Marriage, etc.) really boil down to faith.  

Because all of us have had bad experiences should not damage your faith.  I have known many good people of both genders.  I sure all of us have.  

They are out there.


----------



## Andylusion

High_Gravity said:


> Androw said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> So/so, get laid every month or so but nothing meaningful, the thing is last time I tried to actually date a girl and show interest, brought flowers, paid for the meal etc she ended up friend zoning me and I was pissed, I thought we had chemistry and looked good together but shes not for me. I promised myself that would never happen again.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I'm not sure that's a good take away.    Yeah, it hurt to do that and end up finding out she wasn't interested.
> 
> But saying that you are not going to try for the right kind of relationship, just means you'll end up with the empty meaningless relationship forever.
> 
> The good things in life are hard.  No one got to a good place, without going through the difficult and challenging parts, and I wager that Marriage with a good woman, is no different.
> 
> If the really good stuff in life was all easy, and painless, everyone would have million dollar homes, six-figure incomes, and absolutely wonderful marriages.   Right?
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> You are right, its just that when you put yourself out there for another person you make yourself vulnerable, its just so risky. I'm not saying I'll never do it again but I'd like to at least know the other person is at least interested, but unfortunately its never that easy people are rarely upfront about their feelings.
Click to expand...


Well... I have to agree with you completely on that.    Women have a nasty tendency to never say what they mean, because they don't want the confrontation.   But when they don't say it, then guys are left confused about whether they should simply try harder, or give up.  You end up with wasted emotion, time, and of course money.

I understand that.  So I know where you're coming from.   I've seen it happen several times.

Unfortunately, this is exactly why for centuries, the families would set up couples to date.  The parents of the guy, would meet the parents of the girl, and discuss if the girl was interested, and if she wasn't they'd move on and find someone who was.  If she was, then they would arrange meetings and courtship.

Now, parents kind of shoo the kids out the door during college, and good luck, hope you find someone, and this stuff happens.

I had a co-worker from Somalia, and this was crazy.  He told his parents he didn't want to be single anymore, and asked them to find him a girl.   They sent him some picture of several women, and he picked one and started talking to her over skype.   Sure enough, he flew back to Somalia, and came back a married man.    (and she was a wowzer too)  Not much for Somalie girls, but she was A+ with some extra credit...

If your family isn't nutz, ask them if they know anyone you could just meet once.   Beyond that, yeah it's going to be hard, and its not fun.   But if you want to be married, doing it right is worth it.    Not fun, not easy, but worth it.


----------



## Andylusion

WelfareQueen said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> AyeCantSeeYou said:
> 
> 
> 
> those only exist in fairy tales and stupid love songs - which all lie.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Dont burst my fantasy bubble damn it!  ;-)
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> 
> There are many good men out there...just as there are women.  All of these issues (Children, Marriage, etc.) really boil down to faith.
> 
> Because all of us have had bad experiences should not damage your faith.  I have known many good people of both genders.  I sure all of us have.
> 
> They are out there.
Click to expand...


Just to be honest though...  the picking get slimmer the older you get.  There are good men, but the good men that want to be married (and most do), end up getting married.   Past the age of 30, the ratio of good men to creepers, gets really low.

I'm always shocked by girls specifically that don't date until they are 30, and then are shocked they can't find any good guys.   To me that is a 'duh' moment.


----------



## Diana1180

Good Lord..if I let my family set me up with someone they would try to find a midget eskimo.

They are forever telling me thats the one thing we dont have in our family and I need to date one.


----------



## Diana1180

Androw said:


> WelfareQueen said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> Dont burst my fantasy bubble damn it!  ;-)
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> There are many good men out there...just as there are women.  All of these issues (Children, Marriage, etc.) really boil down to faith.
> 
> Because all of us have had bad experiences should not damage your faith.  I have known many good people of both genders.  I sure all of us have.
> 
> They are out there.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Just to be honest though...  the picking get slimmer the older you get.  There are good men, but the good men that want to be married (and most do), end up getting married.   Past the age of 30, the ratio of good men to creepers, gets really low.
> 
> I'm always shocked by girls specifically that don't date until they are 30, and then are shocked they can't find any good guys.   To me that is a 'duh' moment.
Click to expand...


I am 37.  I was married.  A long time ago and when I was young.  Divorced and having a two year old I focused on her and us.  Now that she is 15...easier for me to date and go out.  

Sometimes the timing doesnt always work out.


----------



## WelfareQueen

There are a lot of good men and women who are divorced.  Yes, good men tend to get snapped up pretty early....but roughly half will end up getting divorced.  

People change in marriage....a lot of times they don't grow together.  I think that is a reason for many divorces.  

Don't lose the faith, people.  That's all I am saying.


----------



## High_Gravity

Androw said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Androw said:
> 
> 
> 
> I'm not sure that's a good take away.    Yeah, it hurt to do that and end up finding out she wasn't interested.
> 
> But saying that you are not going to try for the right kind of relationship, just means you'll end up with the empty meaningless relationship forever.
> 
> The good things in life are hard.  No one got to a good place, without going through the difficult and challenging parts, and I wager that Marriage with a good woman, is no different.
> 
> If the really good stuff in life was all easy, and painless, everyone would have million dollar homes, six-figure incomes, and absolutely wonderful marriages.   Right?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> You are right, its just that when you put yourself out there for another person you make yourself vulnerable, its just so risky. I'm not saying I'll never do it again but I'd like to at least know the other person is at least interested, but unfortunately its never that easy people are rarely upfront about their feelings.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Well... I have to agree with you completely on that.    Women have a nasty tendency to never say what they mean, because they don't want the confrontation.   But when they don't say it, then guys are left confused about whether they should simply try harder, or give up.  You end up with wasted emotion, time, and of course money.
> 
> I understand that.  So I know where you're coming from.   I've seen it happen several times.
> 
> Unfortunately, this is exactly why for centuries, the families would set up couples to date.  The parents of the guy, would meet the parents of the girl, and discuss if the girl was interested, and if she wasn't they'd move on and find someone who was.  If she was, then they would arrange meetings and courtship.
> 
> Now, parents kind of shoo the kids out the door during college, and good luck, hope you find someone, and this stuff happens.
> 
> I had a co-worker from Somalia, and this was crazy.  He told his parents he didn't want to be single anymore, and asked them to find him a girl.   They sent him some picture of several women, and he picked one and started talking to her over skype.   Sure enough, he flew back to Somalia, and came back a married man.    (and she was a wowzer too)  Not much for Somalie girls, but she was A+ with some extra credit...
> 
> If your family isn't nutz, ask them if they know anyone you could just meet once.   Beyond that, yeah it's going to be hard, and its not fun.   But if you want to be married, doing it right is worth it.    Not fun, not easy, but worth it.
Click to expand...


I'm starting to think the older cultures had it right about courtship and dating lol, a Western love life can be mentally exhausting unless you are a wealthy man, than the women come to you lol.


----------



## High_Gravity

Androw said:


> WelfareQueen said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> Dont burst my fantasy bubble damn it!  ;-)
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> There are many good men out there...just as there are women.  All of these issues (Children, Marriage, etc.) really boil down to faith.
> 
> Because all of us have had bad experiences should not damage your faith.  I have known many good people of both genders.  I sure all of us have.
> 
> They are out there.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Just to be honest though...  the picking get slimmer the older you get.  There are good men, but the good men that want to be married (and most do), end up getting married.   Past the age of 30, the ratio of good men to creepers, gets really low.
> 
> I'm always shocked by girls specifically that don't date until they are 30, and then are shocked they can't find any good guys.   To me that is a 'duh' moment.
Click to expand...


You are 100% right and I think it applies both ways, alot of women my age have already had kids by different men and marriages and thats very hard to deal with, and the emotional baggage that comes with that. I'm not opposed to dealing with a woman with kids if its right, but its a difficult fit.


----------



## Andylusion

High_Gravity said:


> Androw said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> WelfareQueen said:
> 
> 
> 
> There are many good men out there...just as there are women.  All of these issues (Children, Marriage, etc.) really boil down to faith.
> 
> Because all of us have had bad experiences should not damage your faith.  I have known many good people of both genders.  I sure all of us have.
> 
> They are out there.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Just to be honest though...  the picking get slimmer the older you get.  There are good men, but the good men that want to be married (and most do), end up getting married.   Past the age of 30, the ratio of good men to creepers, gets really low.
> 
> I'm always shocked by girls specifically that don't date until they are 30, and then are shocked they can't find any good guys.   To me that is a 'duh' moment.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> You are 100% right and I think it applies both ways, alot of women my age have already had kids by different men and marriages and thats very hard to deal with, and the emotional baggage that comes with that. I'm not opposed to dealing with a woman with kids if its right, but its a difficult fit.
Click to expand...


Yes, it is.  I would advise you not to date or consider on any woman with children or ex-husbands.

The divorce rate for blended families, is over 70%.   Look for a younger girl, before you take some chick with kids.

It's not because the girl is bad... it simply doesn't work.   That step kid, will never respect your authority as a parent, because he or she, already has a father, and it's not you.   And when you marry, you also marry that ex-husband, or G-d forbid ex-boy friend which is even worse.   Sometimes you can cut out the ex-hubby with a divorce, but I've seen times where the former boyfriend with kids, never goes away.

Marriage is hard enough in the most perfect situation, why jump into something 100 times harder?

A good girl that's younger, is better than a girl the same age with decades of baggage, by far.     Good luck to those looking.  Hope the best for you.


----------



## Diana1180

Androw said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Androw said:
> 
> 
> 
> Just to be honest though...  the picking get slimmer the older you get.  There are good men, but the good men that want to be married (and most do), end up getting married.   Past the age of 30, the ratio of good men to creepers, gets really low.
> 
> I'm always shocked by girls specifically that don't date until they are 30, and then are shocked they can't find any good guys.   To me that is a 'duh' moment.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> You are 100% right and I think it applies both ways, alot of women my age have already had kids by different men and marriages and thats very hard to deal with, and the emotional baggage that comes with that. I'm not opposed to dealing with a woman with kids if its right, but its a difficult fit.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Yes, it is.  I would advise you not to date or consider on any woman with children or ex-husbands.
> 
> The divorce rate for blended families, is over 70%.   Look for a younger girl, before you take some chick with kids.
> 
> It's not because the girl is bad... it simply doesn't work.   That step kid, will never respect your authority as a parent, because he or she, already has a father, and it's not you.   And when you marry, you also marry that ex-husband, or G-d forbid ex-boy friend which is even worse.   Sometimes you can cut out the ex-hubby with a divorce, but I've seen times where the former boyfriend with kids, never goes away.
> 
> Marriage is hard enough in the most perfect situation, why jump into something 100 times harder?
> 
> A good girl that's younger, is better than a girl the same age with decades of baggage, by far.     Good luck to those looking.  Hope the best for you.
Click to expand...


In that case, good luck finding that young virgin who has no past dating history.


----------



## Statistikhengst




----------



## Vandalshandle

I had to quit going to church because every time I did, I got married. 

NEVER AGAIN!!!!!!!


----------



## Andylusion

Vandalshandle said:


> I had to quit going to church because every time I did, I got married.
> 
> NEVER AGAIN!!!!!!!



How's that working for ya?


----------



## Andylusion

Diana1180 said:


> Androw said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> You are 100% right and I think it applies both ways, alot of women my age have already had kids by different men and marriages and thats very hard to deal with, and the emotional baggage that comes with that. I'm not opposed to dealing with a woman with kids if its right, but its a difficult fit.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Yes, it is.  I would advise you not to date or consider on any woman with children or ex-husbands.
> 
> The divorce rate for blended families, is over 70%.   Look for a younger girl, before you take some chick with kids.
> 
> It's not because the girl is bad... it simply doesn't work.   That step kid, will never respect your authority as a parent, because he or she, already has a father, and it's not you.   And when you marry, you also marry that ex-husband, or G-d forbid ex-boy friend which is even worse.   Sometimes you can cut out the ex-hubby with a divorce, but I've seen times where the former boyfriend with kids, never goes away.
> 
> Marriage is hard enough in the most perfect situation, why jump into something 100 times harder?
> 
> A good girl that's younger, is better than a girl the same age with decades of baggage, by far.     Good luck to those looking.  Hope the best for you.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> In that case, good luck finding that young virgin who has no past dating history.
Click to expand...


Actually... I debated saying this, because it sounds self serving...   but I've had to kind of put up blocks around me to keep the girls away.   As I said before I fully intend to stay single for life, and for some really wacky reason that seems to attract girls, instead of repulse them like I thought it would.


----------



## High_Gravity

Androw said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Androw said:
> 
> 
> 
> Yes, it is.  I would advise you not to date or consider on any woman with children or ex-husbands.
> 
> The divorce rate for blended families, is over 70%.   Look for a younger girl, before you take some chick with kids.
> 
> It's not because the girl is bad... it simply doesn't work.   That step kid, will never respect your authority as a parent, because he or she, already has a father, and it's not you.   And when you marry, you also marry that ex-husband, or G-d forbid ex-boy friend which is even worse.   Sometimes you can cut out the ex-hubby with a divorce, but I've seen times where the former boyfriend with kids, never goes away.
> 
> Marriage is hard enough in the most perfect situation, why jump into something 100 times harder?
> 
> A good girl that's younger, is better than a girl the same age with decades of baggage, by far.     Good luck to those looking.  Hope the best for you.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> In that case, good luck finding that young virgin who has no past dating history.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Actually... I debated saying this, because it sounds self serving...   but I've had to kind of put up blocks around me to keep the girls away.   As I said before I fully intend to stay single for life, and for some really wacky reason that seems to attract girls, instead of repulse them like I thought it would.
Click to expand...


Women are attracted to men who are uninterested and aloof, if you went around looking for a relationship those same women would leave you alone.


----------



## Andylusion

High_Gravity said:


> Androw said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> In that case, good luck finding that young virgin who has no past dating history.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Actually... I debated saying this, because it sounds self serving...   but I've had to kind of put up blocks around me to keep the girls away.   As I said before I fully intend to stay single for life, and for some really wacky reason that seems to attract girls, instead of repulse them like I thought it would.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Women are attracted to men who are uninterested and aloof, if you went around looking for a relationship those same women would leave you alone.
Click to expand...


Yeah, although the reverse plan has gotten me in some trouble before, with some girls thinking I'm really interested in them.    Apparently the only way to keep them away, short of discontinuing the deodorant, and eating lots of taco bell, is to absolutely keep them as far away as possible.

But by far the most disturbing were two married chicks.  That was absolutely creepy to the max.    People are nutz these days.


----------



## High_Gravity

Androw said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Androw said:
> 
> 
> 
> Actually... I debated saying this, because it sounds self serving...   but I've had to kind of put up blocks around me to keep the girls away.   As I said before I fully intend to stay single for life, and for some really wacky reason that seems to attract girls, instead of repulse them like I thought it would.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Women are attracted to men who are uninterested and aloof, if you went around looking for a relationship those same women would leave you alone.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Yeah, although the reverse plan has gotten me in some trouble before, with some girls thinking I'm really interested in them.    Apparently the only way to keep them away, short of discontinuing the deodorant, and eating lots of taco bell, is to absolutely keep them as far away as possible.
> 
> But by far the most disturbing were two married chicks.  That was absolutely creepy to the max.    People are nutz these days.
Click to expand...


I've been with about 3 married women during the 2 years I been single, its just crazy to me how marriage is this thing that women insist on when they get serious with you than when they get what they want they are absolutely miserable! all the married women I have been with were totally miserable and hated their life.


----------



## Diana1180

You want to talk about married woman... oy, you should see the amount of married men that are trying to get a piece on the side, claiming how miserable they are.

wait wait wait... you have "BEEN WITH" 3 married woman??


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> You want to talk about married woman... oy, you should see the amount of married men that are trying to get a piece on the side, claiming how miserable they are.
> 
> wait wait wait... you have "BEEN WITH" 3 married woman??



Yes, although 2 of them no longer lived with their husbands they had their own apartments, one of them did go back to her husband after we stopped seeing each other. I attract more women who are married or have boyfriends than single women, I have no idea why. It seems that married people in general are very unhappy.


----------



## Andylusion

High_Gravity said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> You want to talk about married woman... oy, you should see the amount of married men that are trying to get a piece on the side, claiming how miserable they are.
> 
> wait wait wait... you have "BEEN WITH" 3 married woman??
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Yes, although 2 of them no longer lived with their husbands they had their own apartments, one of them did go back to her husband after we stopped seeing each other. I attract more women who are married or have boyfriends than single women, I have no idea why. It seems that married people in general are very unhappy.
Click to expand...


I might suggest you stay away from married women.   Doesn't matter if they are separated or not.   When a good, decent girl, with the kind of moral values you want, hears you were hanging out with a married chick, you are crossed off the list forever in her book.

And a tiny bit of advice, don't think you can bury stuff like this.  It will come back at the oddest times later in life, and you won't shake it.

I can't even count the number of guys I have met that talked about how their horrible wife cheated on them, and then in separate conversations said "oh yeah I banged this one girl who was married", at which point I want to choke them with razer wire.

You reap what you sow.  What goes around, comes around.  Karma.   You need to consider that with every action you take.


----------



## Statistikhengst

I had a great date just two nights ago, it was, to put it mildly, awesome.  Oh, and the sex was pretty darned good, too. But there is something about this woman that makes me want to get to know her more...


----------



## WelfareQueen

Statistikhengst said:


> I had a great date just two nights ago, it was, to put it mildly, awesome.  Oh, and the sex was pretty darned good, too. But there is something about this woman that makes me want to get to know her more...




Starting a new relationship with someone you really connect with is one of the great experiences in life.  It's the exploring....everywhere.  

Enjoy Stat.  Savor every moment.


----------



## Diana1180

Androw said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> You want to talk about married woman... oy, you should see the amount of married men that are trying to get a piece on the side, claiming how miserable they are.
> 
> wait wait wait... you have "BEEN WITH" 3 married woman??
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Yes, although 2 of them no longer lived with their husbands they had their own apartments, one of them did go back to her husband after we stopped seeing each other. I attract more women who are married or have boyfriends than single women, I have no idea why. It seems that married people in general are very unhappy.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I might suggest you stay away from married women.   Doesn't matter if they are separated or not.   When a good, decent girl, with the kind of moral values you want, hears you were hanging out with a married chick, you are crossed off the list forever in her book.
> 
> And a tiny bit of advice, don't think you can bury stuff like this.  It will come back at the oddest times later in life, and you won't shake it.
> 
> I can't even count the number of guys I have met that talked about how their horrible wife cheated on them, and then in separate conversations said "oh yeah I banged this one girl who was married", at which point I want to choke them with razer wire.
> 
> You reap what you sow.  What goes around, comes around.  Karma.   You need to consider that with every action you take.
Click to expand...


This.


----------



## Mad_Cabbie

Statistikhengst said:


> I had a great date just two nights ago, it was, to put it mildly, awesome.  Oh, and the sex was pretty darned good, too. But there is something about this woman that makes me want to get to know her more...



Stat - you might try_ not hopping_ into bed with someone you just met - especially if you hope to date her long-term. 

Sleeping with someone too soon is a relationship killer. Get to know her first ... date her ... go to some _Pagan pride day march _or whatever it is that you Libs like to do. 

But put off the sex until she's your girlfriend - at least.


----------



## High_Gravity

Androw said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> You want to talk about married woman... oy, you should see the amount of married men that are trying to get a piece on the side, claiming how miserable they are.
> 
> wait wait wait... you have "BEEN WITH" 3 married woman??
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Yes, although 2 of them no longer lived with their husbands they had their own apartments, one of them did go back to her husband after we stopped seeing each other. I attract more women who are married or have boyfriends than single women, I have no idea why. It seems that married people in general are very unhappy.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I might suggest you stay away from married women.   Doesn't matter if they are separated or not.   When a good, decent girl, with the kind of moral values you want, hears you were hanging out with a married chick, you are crossed off the list forever in her book.
> 
> And a tiny bit of advice, don't think you can bury stuff like this.  It will come back at the oddest times later in life, and you won't shake it.
> 
> I can't even count the number of guys I have met that talked about how their horrible wife cheated on them, and then in separate conversations said "oh yeah I banged this one girl who was married", at which point I want to choke them with razer wire.
> 
> You reap what you sow.  What goes around, comes around.  Karma.   You need to consider that with every action you take.
Click to expand...


Thats very damn true smh.


----------



## Luddly Neddite

Statistikhengst said:


> I had a great date just two nights ago, it was, to put it mildly, awesome.  Oh, and the sex was pretty darned good, too. But there is something about this woman that makes me want to get to know her more...



Good luck. You seem like a guy that most women would like to meet. 

I hope it goes well for you.


----------



## Statistikhengst

Luddly Neddite said:


> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> I had a great date just two nights ago, it was, to put it mildly, awesome.  Oh, and the sex was pretty darned good, too. But there is something about this woman that makes me want to get to know her more...
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Good luck. You seem like a guy that most women would like to meet.
> 
> I hope it goes well for you.
Click to expand...



Most women find me difficult, because I don't beat around the bush, I don't play "the game" and I am unbelievably direct.  Either they like it or they don't. Pffft. After one marriage, I sure as hell am not looking for a 2nd.

Thanks for the kind words.


----------



## Darlene

Hmmm, what would I like to say about myself? 

I have a very handsome son named Malikai, a baby on the way (hoping for a boy), I hate country and r&b (I prefer acid/psychedelic rock, heavy metal, some folk, reggae, 60s-current rock). I'm listening to Collective Soul now: [ame=http://youtu.be/_m0bI82Rz_k?list=AL94UKMTqg-9AznFik4OFbU_mgzUe4aNdO]Collective Soul - Shine (Video) - YouTube[/ame]


----------



## Samson

Statistikhengst said:


> Most women find me difficult, because I don't beat around the bush,....








Here ya go Stat;






Yer welcome


----------



## Diana1180

Statistikhengst said:


> Luddly Neddite said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> I had a great date just two nights ago, it was, to put it mildly, awesome.  Oh, and the sex was pretty darned good, too. But there is something about this woman that makes me want to get to know her more...
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Good luck. You seem like a guy that most women would like to meet.
> 
> I hope it goes well for you.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> 
> Most women find me difficult, because I don't beat around the bush, I don't play "the game" and I am unbelievably direct.  Either they like it or they don't. Pffft. After one marriage, I sure as hell am not looking for a 2nd.
> 
> Thanks for the kind words.
Click to expand...


I think this is why most men find me difficult. lol


----------



## BluesMistress

I'm Hot & Crazy ~~~


----------



## ChrisL

Statistikhengst said:


> Luddly Neddite said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> I had a great date just two nights ago, it was, to put it mildly, awesome.  Oh, and the sex was pretty darned good, too. But there is something about this woman that makes me want to get to know her more...
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Good luck. You seem like a guy that most women would like to meet.
> 
> I hope it goes well for you.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> 
> Most women find me difficult, because I don't beat around the bush, I don't play "the game" and I am unbelievably direct.  Either they like it or they don't. Pffft. After one marriage, I sure as hell am not looking for a 2nd.
> 
> Thanks for the kind words.
Click to expand...


No games?  SOME games are fun.


----------



## earlycuyler

Okay, got a question. If she go's down does he have to go down ?


----------



## Mad_Cabbie

earlycuyler said:


> Okay, got a question. If she go's down does he have to go down ?



"Have to?" 

_Please _don't throw me into the brier patch!!!


----------



## Mad_Cabbie

ChrisL said:


> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Luddly Neddite said:
> 
> 
> 
> Good luck. You seem like a guy that most women would like to meet.
> 
> I hope it goes well for you.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Most women find me difficult, because I don't beat around the bush, I don't play "the game" and I am unbelievably direct.  Either they like it or they don't. Pffft. After one marriage, I sure as hell am not looking for a 2nd.
> 
> Thanks for the kind words.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> No games?  SOME games are fun.
Click to expand...


Dating and sex has been a "game" since before humans were human. It's a game by design - even animals follow courtship "rules."


----------



## Mad_Cabbie

Diana1180 said:


> I think this is why most men find me difficult. lol



Why would men find you difficult? 

Are you failing to abide by the "rules" as well?


----------



## Andylusion

Mad_Cabbie said:


> ChrisL said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> Most women find me difficult, because I don't beat around the bush, I don't play "the game" and I am unbelievably direct.  Either they like it or they don't. Pffft. After one marriage, I sure as hell am not looking for a 2nd.
> 
> Thanks for the kind words.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> No games?  SOME games are fun.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Dating and sex has been a "game" since before humans were human. It's a game by design - even animals follow courtship "rules."
Click to expand...


I'm not sure what the prior poster(s) were all referring to....

However, when I think of "playing games", I don't think of playful flirting with your spouse.   I don't think of foreplay games.

Now if that is what people are referring to, then I'm all for it.  No problem with that at all.

But when I think of 'playing games with people'... to me that refers to the crap I witnessed in high school and college.   I saw 'boys' toying with girls like they were a pet.  Like a cat chasing a string.

I watched numerous girls chasing after guys, who pretended that they had something special, when in reality, they could not have possibly cared less about them.   They only wanted sex, they got sex after toying with the girl long enough, and then dumped her like she was moldy bread.

Now if that is what you mean by playing with people, I think you should be beaten with a stick, and then strangled to death.  I don't know where these guys grew up, be I was taught to not treat girls that way.


----------



## ChrisL

Androw said:


> Mad_Cabbie said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> ChrisL said:
> 
> 
> 
> No games?  SOME games are fun.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Dating and sex has been a "game" since before humans were human. It's a game by design - even animals follow courtship "rules."
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I'm not sure what the prior poster(s) were all referring to....
> 
> However, when I think of "playing games", I don't think of playful flirting with your spouse.   I don't think of foreplay games.
> 
> Now if that is what people are referring to, then I'm all for it.  No problem with that at all.
> 
> But when I think of 'playing games with people'... to me that refers to the crap I witnessed in high school and college.   I saw 'boys' toying with girls like they were a pet.  Like a cat chasing a string.
> 
> I watched numerous girls chasing after guys, who pretended that they had something special, when in reality, they could not have possibly cared less about them.   They only wanted sex, they got sex after toying with the girl long enough, and then dumped her like she was moldy bread.
> 
> Now if that is what you mean by playing with people, I think you should be beaten with a stick, and then strangled to death.  I don't know where these guys grew up, be I was taught to not treat girls that way.
Click to expand...


Well I am a female and not gay so I don't use females and throw them out like "moldy bread" either.  And I was referring to sexual games, but it was only a joke because the other poster had said he didn't like games.  Geez, I didn't know you guys were so serious around here.    I thought this was the singles flirty place, not the "I hate games and flirting" place.


----------



## ChrisL

Mad_Cabbie said:


> ChrisL said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> Most women find me difficult, because I don't beat around the bush, I don't play "the game" and I am unbelievably direct.  Either they like it or they don't. Pffft. After one marriage, I sure as hell am not looking for a 2nd.
> 
> Thanks for the kind words.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> No games?  SOME games are fun.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Dating and sex has been a "game" since before humans were human. It's a game by design - even animals follow courtship "rules."
Click to expand...


There are NO rules in love and war!


----------



## DriftingSand

Was single then married then single then married then single then married now single again (even though still legally married).  No longer looking. Don't feel like going through the energy drain and don't feel like experiencing any more heartache in my life.  I gots my computer; I gots my Xbox; I gots my big screen TV; and I gots my stereo.  What more can a man want?

Oh ... and bartender ... a tall lemonade and bowl of peanuts for me.  Thanks.


----------



## ChrisL

DriftingSand said:


> Was single then married then single then married then single then married now single again (even though still legally married).  No longer looking. Don't feel like going through the energy drain and don't feel like experiencing any more heartache in my life.  I gots my computer; I gots my Xbox; I gots my big screen TV; and I gots my stereo.  What more can a man want?
> 
> Oh ... and bartender ... a tall lemonade and bowl of peanuts for me.  Thanks.



You've been married 3 times?  I thought third time was a charm?


----------



## DriftingSand

ChrisL said:


> DriftingSand said:
> 
> 
> 
> Was single then married then single then married then single then married now single again (even though still legally married).  No longer looking. Don't feel like going through the energy drain and don't feel like experiencing any more heartache in my life.  I gots my computer; I gots my Xbox; I gots my big screen TV; and I gots my stereo.  What more can a man want?
> 
> Oh ... and bartender ... a tall lemonade and bowl of peanuts for me.  Thanks.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> You've been married 3 times?  I thought third time was a charm?
Click to expand...


In a way it was since it was the best of the three but I guess all good things must end (as the saying goes).


----------



## ChrisL

DriftingSand said:


> ChrisL said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> DriftingSand said:
> 
> 
> 
> Was single then married then single then married then single then married now single again (even though still legally married).  No longer looking. Don't feel like going through the energy drain and don't feel like experiencing any more heartache in my life.  I gots my computer; I gots my Xbox; I gots my big screen TV; and I gots my stereo.  What more can a man want?
> 
> Oh ... and bartender ... a tall lemonade and bowl of peanuts for me.  Thanks.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> You've been married 3 times?  I thought third time was a charm?
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> In a way it was since it was the best of the three but I guess all good things must end (as the saying goes).
Click to expand...


Sorry to hear that.


----------



## earlycuyler

Is seven months to soon to be talking about getting a place together ?


----------



## earlycuyler

Seems sudden to me.


----------



## Diana1180

earlycuyler said:


> Is seven months to soon to be talking about getting a place together ?



In my opinion, yes.  But I have a child who lives with me.

If I was young and no child... maybe.  It depends I guess.  Every situation is different.

Any bad vibes..red flags.... hold off a bit.


----------



## High_Gravity

earlycuyler said:


> Is seven months to soon to be talking about getting a place together ?



Depends, for me yes. After my experience with my ex gf I am hesitant to share a space with anyone, if you do agree to this make sure you have a back up plan and a place to go in case it goes to hell. My ex gf and my name were both on the lease so I could not kick her out so I had to stay in a crack hotel for 2 weeks until I scrounged up enough money for my own apartment, and the landlord would not take my name off the lease either.


----------



## Andylusion

ChrisL said:


> Mad_Cabbie said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> ChrisL said:
> 
> 
> 
> No games?  SOME games are fun.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Dating and sex has been a "game" since before humans were human. It's a game by design - even animals follow courtship "rules."
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> There are NO rules in love and war!
Click to expand...


Not so much in war, but there are in love for sure.  I would suggest to you that it is exactly because people have been doing love without rules, that is why our culture today is the train wreck that it is.   I would say the divorce rate alone, is a direct result of thinking there are no rules in love.

There are rules in love, and those that break the rules end up ruined by them.


----------



## AquaAthena

DriftingSand said:


> Was single then married then single then married then single then married now single again (even though still legally married).  No longer looking. Don't feel like going through the energy drain and don't feel like experiencing any more heartache in my life.  I gots my computer; I gots my Xbox; I gots my big screen TV; and I gots my stereo.  What more can a man want?
> 
> Oh ... and bartender ... a tall lemonade and bowl of peanuts for me.  Thanks.



I have all that too, DriftingSand ( except the Xbox ) plus I have a great cat, my perfect companion. No more drama in my life. Peace and contentment.  It's nice to have a long-distance sweetheart, too.  

I hope you have a dog. I can't imagine living happily without an animal friend to love.


----------



## AquaAthena

Androw said:


> ChrisL said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Mad_Cabbie said:
> 
> 
> 
> Dating and sex has been a "game" since before humans were human. It's a game by design - even animals follow courtship "rules."
> 
> 
> 
> 
> There are NO rules in love and war!
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Not so much in war, but there are in love for sure.  I would suggest to you that it is exactly because people have been doing love without rules, that is why our culture today is the train wreck that it is.   I would say the divorce rate alone, is a direct result of thinking there are no rules in love.
> 
> There are rules in love, and those that break the rules end up ruined by them.
Click to expand...


I have found, going by all the rules of morality, holds no guarantees of a lasting relationship. It does however, let one leave with their dignity intact.  

Entitlements and the 60's led to the breakup of family life, for the most part. Those two forces have contributed more to the downfall of our country, more than anything else, in my opinion.


----------



## WelfareQueen

AquaAthena said:


> Androw said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> ChrisL said:
> 
> 
> 
> There are NO rules in love and war!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Not so much in war, but there are in love for sure.  I would suggest to you that it is exactly because people have been doing love without rules, that is why our culture today is the train wreck that it is.   I would say the divorce rate alone, is a direct result of thinking there are no rules in love.
> 
> There are rules in love, and those that break the rules end up ruined by them.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I have found, going by all the rules of morality, holds no guarantees of a lasting relationship. It does however, let one leave with their dignity intact.
> 
> Entitlements and the 60's led to the breakup of family life, for the most part. Those two forces have contributed more to the downfall of our country, more than anything else, in my opinion.
Click to expand...



So true.  The end of America's innocence was really the 1960's.  Kennedy's murder, the drug culture, and Vietnam.  Our view as Americans changed from one comprising a true sense of community to narcissism, self-interest, and "finding yourself."  

If anything....those attitude have gotten much more ingrained.  No wonder relationships and family life has suffered.  How can relationships really work if it's always supposed to be about you and your needs to "find yourself."


----------



## DriftingSand

AquaAthena said:


> DriftingSand said:
> 
> 
> 
> Was single then married then single then married then single then married now single again (even though still legally married).  No longer looking. Don't feel like going through the energy drain and don't feel like experiencing any more heartache in my life.  I gots my computer; I gots my Xbox; I gots my big screen TV; and I gots my stereo.  What more can a man want?
> 
> Oh ... and bartender ... a tall lemonade and bowl of peanuts for me.  Thanks.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I have all that too, DriftingSand ( except the Xbox ) plus I have a great cat, my perfect companion. No more drama in my life. Peace and contentment.  It's nice to have a long-distance sweetheart, too.
> 
> I hope you have a dog. I can't imagine living happily without an animal friend to love.
Click to expand...


At first, I was in shock but I'm really luvin' it now.  There's something comforting about waking up with a warm body next to you but there's something freeing about doing whatever I want when I want.  I think that, overall, I'm under less stress so that makes me happier.


----------



## Statistikhengst

DriftingSand said:


> AquaAthena said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> DriftingSand said:
> 
> 
> 
> Was single then married then single then married then single then married now single again (even though still legally married).  No longer looking. Don't feel like going through the energy drain and don't feel like experiencing any more heartache in my life.  I gots my computer; I gots my Xbox; I gots my big screen TV; and I gots my stereo.  What more can a man want?
> 
> Oh ... and bartender ... a tall lemonade and bowl of peanuts for me.  Thanks.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I have all that too, DriftingSand ( except the Xbox ) plus I have a great cat, my perfect companion. No more drama in my life. Peace and contentment.  It's nice to have a long-distance sweetheart, too.
> 
> I hope you have a dog. I can't imagine living happily without an animal friend to love.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> At first, I was in shock but I'm really luvin' it now.  There's something comforting about waking up *with a warm body next to you* but there's something freeing about doing whatever I want when I want.  I think that, overall, I'm under less stress so that makes me happier.
Click to expand...




I like the warm body part, but she needs to be really, really voluptuous.


----------



## Andylusion

earlycuyler said:


> Is seven months to soon to be talking about getting a place together ?



Well... Disclaimer....  I'm an old fashioned person, and thus my advice likely does not fit, and will be ignored by most, and I'm ok with that.   If you think I'm full of crap, and old fogey garbage, that works just fine for me.  This my opinion, and you paid nothing for it, and so I'll guarantee you a full refund.

1.  If you are not married, you shouldn't be getting a place, or living together at all.

90% of all shackup relationships fail.  Research after research, shows that your chances of having a happy marriage fall, the moment you shackup.

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/03/03/us/03marry.html?_r=0

This is just one of THOUSANDS of sources that all show that if you want a short term, doomed to fail relationship, your best bet is to shackup.  

2.  Not being married and buying a place together, is almost a guarantee of heartache and problems.

If you are not married, there is no legal method of separating assets.

The following examples are real.  These are people I actually know.

One girl bought a house with her boyfriend.  The boyfriend decided he wanted a new girl friend.    He brought the 'new' girl friend home with him.   Meanwhile the girl I know, was still in the house.

Because they were not married, the house is considered 'jointly' owned.  Meaning that both people can do whatever they want in the home.   There is no way to force either to separate the property.   There is no divorce court to split the asset, because they are not married.

Another example, was a guy who bought a car, with his girl friend.   The girl decided she wanted a new guy, and drove off in the car.   He can't call the police, because it's legally equally her car too.    So he just lost the car.   Of course he stopped paying payments on the car, and of course she didn't pay the payments either.    So now his credit is trashed, and she still has the car.  If they ever find the car, and repo it, then he'll have a repo on his credit report as well.    He has no legal recourse.  After they repo it, and sell it, whatever deficit there is, he'll end up owing, and they garnish his wages over it.

When you buy things with someone you are not married too, you are ASKING for trouble.

I know of another deal where, I can't remember if it was the guy, or the girl, that did it, but one paid for the entire college education of the other, and the moment they finished the degree, they left.   Nothing the other could do.  Can't take them to court.  They were not married.  The money is gone, and some other lucky person has a fully educated spouse, and has no debt.

Now before I get swamped with flames, I know that the same thing can happen with married couples.   Marriage is not a 100% certified guarantee of relational success.   If a spouse really wants to do something crazy, there is no possible way to prevent it from happening... but....  Not being married practically a guarantee you'll end up hurt.

3.  Lastly, once you are married, I would suggest you rent a place for at least a year.   It takes that long to figure out how far away from the in-laws, to buy a home. 

If you find out your spouses family drives you crazy, then you need to buy a house farther away.

Additionally, sometimes in the first year of marriage, you find something out about your spouse, that they hid from you, or intentionally misled you.  I would suggest you move immediately for an annulment.  Typically this level of crazy comes out in the first year, and thus, not owning a home make it easier.


----------



## Andylusion

AquaAthena said:


> Androw said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> ChrisL said:
> 
> 
> 
> There are NO rules in love and war!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Not so much in war, but there are in love for sure.  I would suggest to you that it is exactly because people have been doing love without rules, that is why our culture today is the train wreck that it is.   I would say the divorce rate alone, is a direct result of thinking there are no rules in love.
> 
> There are rules in love, and those that break the rules end up ruined by them.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I have found, going by all the rules of morality, holds no guarantees of a lasting relationship. It does however, let one leave with their dignity intact.
> 
> Entitlements and the 60's led to the breakup of family life, for the most part. Those two forces have contributed more to the downfall of our country, more than anything else, in my opinion.
Click to expand...


Well of course not.  There is no such thing as 'guarantees' in this would for anything.    We should have figured that out in 2008.  "housing prices will always go up!  Guaranteed!"....   fail.

But when it comes to relationships, when you do things that right way, yeah it doesn't guarantee success... but doing it the wrong way, is almost a guarantee of failure.

It's like not driving your car off a cliff, doesn't guarantee you'll never die in an accident.... equally driving your car off a cliff doesn't guarantee you will die...

But between the two, your chances of dying are much higher doing the 'drive off the cliff' plan.

Similarly, shacking up doesn't automatically mean you will fail, and doing it right doesn't automatically mean perfection and bliss.

But I promise you, and all the statistics I have ever seen show, that doing it the wrong way, drastically increases the chance of heartache and failure.

Even without research and the statistics, I can go down the list of people I know, and the relationship they have had, and it all plays out the same.

I know a girl right now, who ended up in therapy for 3 years... because she 'hooked up' with one guy, was used and dumped.  Hooked up with another for 3 years, and was dumped.  Hooked up with a 3rd, and that ended in a week.

5 years later, she got her head unscrambled in therapy.   Finally, she met a guy, married the guy, and now she's been married 5 years, and has two kids.

When she did it right... it worked.    Shocking....  Well... not to me.   Now does that mean every time you do it right it works?  No.  Absolutely not.   But I honestly only know of one single couple, in all my years, and all the people I have met in my life... just one out of dozens on dozens on dozens, that shacked up, and they are still together.

All the rest.... heartache... pain...  ruined lives... .ruined kids.

All coincidence?   Ok.  Whatever you want to believe.


----------



## ChrisL

earlycuyler said:


> Is seven months to soon to be talking about getting a place together ?



Sounds pretty soon to me.  Is 7 months the amount of time you've known this person or the amount of time you've been dating?  I guess if you've known this person from before you were dating, it might not be too soon.


----------



## ChrisL

Androw said:


> ChrisL said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Mad_Cabbie said:
> 
> 
> 
> Dating and sex has been a "game" since before humans were human. It's a game by design - even animals follow courtship "rules."
> 
> 
> 
> 
> There are NO rules in love and war!
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Not so much in war, but there are in love for sure.  I would suggest to you that it is exactly because people have been doing love without rules, that is why our culture today is the train wreck that it is.   I would say the divorce rate alone, is a direct result of thinking there are no rules in love.
> 
> There are rules in love, and those that break the rules end up ruined by them.
Click to expand...


I'm only joking around.  Like I said, I didn't realize you guys were having such a serious discussion when I posted it.


----------



## Diana1180

Androw said:


> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> Is seven months to soon to be talking about getting a place together ?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Well... Disclaimer....  I'm an old fashioned person, and thus my advice likely does not fit, and will be ignored by most, and I'm ok with that.   If you think I'm full of crap, and old fogey garbage, that works just fine for me.  This my opinion, and you paid nothing for it, and so I'll guarantee you a full refund.
> 
> 1.  If you are not married, you shouldn't be getting a place, or living together at all.
> 
> 90% of all shackup relationships fail.  Research after research, shows that your chances of having a happy marriage fall, the moment you shackup.
> 
> http://www.nytimes.com/2010/03/03/us/03marry.html?_r=0
> 
> This is just one of THOUSANDS of sources that all show that if you want a short term, doomed to fail relationship, your best bet is to shackup.
> 
> 2.  Not being married and buying a place together, is almost a guarantee of heartache and problems.
> 
> If you are not married, there is no legal method of separating assets.
> 
> The following examples are real.  These are people I actually know.
> 
> One girl bought a house with her boyfriend.  The boyfriend decided he wanted a new girl friend.    He brought the 'new' girl friend home with him.   Meanwhile the girl I know, was still in the house.
> 
> Because they were not married, the house is considered 'jointly' owned.  Meaning that both people can do whatever they want in the home.   There is no way to force either to separate the property.   There is no divorce court to split the asset, because they are not married.
> 
> Another example, was a guy who bought a car, with his girl friend.   The girl decided she wanted a new guy, and drove off in the car.   He can't call the police, because it's legally equally her car too.    So he just lost the car.   Of course he stopped paying payments on the car, and of course she didn't pay the payments either.    So now his credit is trashed, and she still has the car.  If they ever find the car, and repo it, then he'll have a repo on his credit report as well.    He has no legal recourse.  After they repo it, and sell it, whatever deficit there is, he'll end up owing, and they garnish his wages over it.
> 
> When you buy things with someone you are not married too, you are ASKING for trouble.
> 
> I know of another deal where, I can't remember if it was the guy, or the girl, that did it, but one paid for the entire college education of the other, and the moment they finished the degree, they left.   Nothing the other could do.  Can't take them to court.  They were not married.  The money is gone, and some other lucky person has a fully educated spouse, and has no debt.
> 
> Now before I get swamped with flames, I know that the same thing can happen with married couples.   Marriage is not a 100% certified guarantee of relational success.   If a spouse really wants to do something crazy, there is no possible way to prevent it from happening... but....  Not being married practically a guarantee you'll end up hurt.
> 
> 3.  Lastly, once you are married, I would suggest you rent a place for at least a year.   It takes that long to figure out how far away from the in-laws, to buy a home.
> 
> If you find out your spouses family drives you crazy, then you need to buy a house farther away.
> 
> Additionally, sometimes in the first year of marriage, you find something out about your spouse, that they hid from you, or intentionally misled you.  I would suggest you move immediately for an annulment.  Typically this level of crazy comes out in the first year, and thus, not owning a home make it easier.
Click to expand...


I can agree with about 95% of this post and I am only 37.  I would never mingle financial obligations with someone I am just dating or even in a long term relationship with.  That would be saved for marriage.  I dont want any of these examples happenign to me.  I have worked too hard for my money and what I have.

Pretty much my only disagreement is that I could not marry someone I have not lived with.  Financial stuff still stays seperate and both names are on the lease but living with someone and finding out all their quirks would help me decide if they are somone i COULD marry.  

I just moved a year ago and the guy i was with was supposed to be moving in with me.  Things happened (after I signed the lease) and he didnt end up moving with me.  I HAD to move since my daughter was accepted to a school and we needed to be closer to the school.  I made sure I moved to a house that I can afford on my own....just in case.  He had been trying to figure out what we can afford with two incomes.

Boy was I glad I stuck to my guns on that one.


----------



## Andylusion

Diana1180 said:


> Androw said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> earlycuyler said:
> 
> 
> 
> Is seven months to soon to be talking about getting a place together ?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Well... Disclaimer....  I'm an old fashioned person, and thus my advice likely does not fit, and will be ignored by most, and I'm ok with that.   If you think I'm full of crap, and old fogey garbage, that works just fine for me.  This my opinion, and you paid nothing for it, and so I'll guarantee you a full refund.
> 
> 1.  If you are not married, you shouldn't be getting a place, or living together at all.
> 
> 90% of all shackup relationships fail.  Research after research, shows that your chances of having a happy marriage fall, the moment you shackup.
> 
> http://www.nytimes.com/2010/03/03/us/03marry.html?_r=0
> 
> This is just one of THOUSANDS of sources that all show that if you want a short term, doomed to fail relationship, your best bet is to shackup.
> 
> 2.  Not being married and buying a place together, is almost a guarantee of heartache and problems.
> 
> If you are not married, there is no legal method of separating assets.
> 
> The following examples are real.  These are people I actually know.
> 
> One girl bought a house with her boyfriend.  The boyfriend decided he wanted a new girl friend.    He brought the 'new' girl friend home with him.   Meanwhile the girl I know, was still in the house.
> 
> Because they were not married, the house is considered 'jointly' owned.  Meaning that both people can do whatever they want in the home.   There is no way to force either to separate the property.   There is no divorce court to split the asset, because they are not married.
> 
> Another example, was a guy who bought a car, with his girl friend.   The girl decided she wanted a new guy, and drove off in the car.   He can't call the police, because it's legally equally her car too.    So he just lost the car.   Of course he stopped paying payments on the car, and of course she didn't pay the payments either.    So now his credit is trashed, and she still has the car.  If they ever find the car, and repo it, then he'll have a repo on his credit report as well.    He has no legal recourse.  After they repo it, and sell it, whatever deficit there is, he'll end up owing, and they garnish his wages over it.
> 
> When you buy things with someone you are not married too, you are ASKING for trouble.
> 
> I know of another deal where, I can't remember if it was the guy, or the girl, that did it, but one paid for the entire college education of the other, and the moment they finished the degree, they left.   Nothing the other could do.  Can't take them to court.  They were not married.  The money is gone, and some other lucky person has a fully educated spouse, and has no debt.
> 
> Now before I get swamped with flames, I know that the same thing can happen with married couples.   Marriage is not a 100% certified guarantee of relational success.   If a spouse really wants to do something crazy, there is no possible way to prevent it from happening... but....  Not being married practically a guarantee you'll end up hurt.
> 
> 3.  Lastly, once you are married, I would suggest you rent a place for at least a year.   It takes that long to figure out how far away from the in-laws, to buy a home.
> 
> If you find out your spouses family drives you crazy, then you need to buy a house farther away.
> 
> Additionally, sometimes in the first year of marriage, you find something out about your spouse, that they hid from you, or intentionally misled you.  I would suggest you move immediately for an annulment.  Typically this level of crazy comes out in the first year, and thus, not owning a home make it easier.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I can agree with about 95% of this post and I am only 37.  I would never mingle financial obligations with someone I am just dating or even in a long term relationship with.  That would be saved for marriage.  I dont want any of these examples happenign to me.  I have worked too hard for my money and what I have.
> 
> Pretty much my only disagreement is that I could not marry someone I have not lived with.  Financial stuff still stays seperate and both names are on the lease but living with someone and finding out all their quirks would help me decide if they are somone i COULD marry.
> 
> I just moved a year ago and the guy i was with was supposed to be moving in with me.  Things happened (after I signed the lease) and he didnt end up moving with me.  I HAD to move since my daughter was accepted to a school and we needed to be closer to the school.  I made sure I moved to a house that I can afford on my own....just in case.  He had been trying to figure out what we can afford with two incomes.
> 
> Boy was I glad I stuck to my guns on that one.
Click to expand...


The lowest rate of divorce is with those who have not lived together until they are married.   It's just statistics.

In your case, you should know that blended families have a massive divorce rate.   Your best bet is to stay single until the kids move on.   The Brady Bunch was fake TV crap.  Reality is, you marry some guy with kids, or when you have kids, chances are you will end up with broken hearts, and screwed up kids.   It's just a fact.   Not trying to be mean.


----------



## AquaAthena

I would only live romantically with someone I didn't want to spend the rest of my life, with. 

Having said that, I did live with my favorite former hubby for one year, before we married and it lasted 14 years before it's lifetime was over.   No regrets, and never looked back, only forward. 

I would say 7 months is too soon. The longer you stay living apart, the more you will value living together, in my opinion.


----------



## Jackson

I was married for 15 years then got my divorce and said "Never again."  Later on, I could see my self possibly living with someone, as long as I had one foot out the door.  No more attorneys, depositions, counselling appointments...no, no way!  Even then, when that came close, I backed away.  Too independent.  Two households and my time and his time is important. Keeps the romance alive.

Just like now...I am doing What I want to do...  Is that selfish?


----------



## Jackson

earlycuyler said:


> Is seven months to soon to be talking about getting a place together ?



Why the rush?  If it's real... you have a lifetime together.  Learn more about each other.


----------



## GISMYS

Jackson said:


> I was married for 15 years then got my divorce and said "Never again."  Later on, I could see my self possibly living with someone, as long as I had one foot out the door.  No more attorneys, depositions, counselling appointments...no, no way!  Even then, when that came close, I backed away.  Too independent.  Two households and my time and his time is important. Keeps the romance alive.
> 
> Just like now...I am doing What I want to do...  Is that selfish?



YOU SAY"...I am doing What I want to do... Is that selfish? 
" HOW ABOUT DOING WHAT IS RIGHT?


----------



## Jackson

GISMYS said:


> Jackson said:
> 
> 
> 
> I was married for 15 years then got my divorce and said "Never again."  Later on, I could see my self possibly living with someone, as long as I had one foot out the door.  No more attorneys, depositions, counselling appointments...no, no way!  Even then, when that came close, I backed away.  Too independent.  Two households and my time and his time is important. Keeps the romance alive.
> 
> Just like now...I am doing What I want to do...  Is that selfish?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> YOU SAY"...I am doing What I want to do... Is that selfish?
> " HOW ABOUT DOING WHAT IS RIGHT?
Click to expand...

Well, what is right?  Getting married?  No way!  We've only been together for 15 years.lol.  Why rush into things!


----------



## GISMYS

Jackson said:


> GISMYS said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Jackson said:
> 
> 
> 
> I was married for 15 years then got my divorce and said "Never again."  Later on, I could see my self possibly living with someone, as long as I had one foot out the door.  No more attorneys, depositions, counselling appointments...no, no way!  Even then, when that came close, I backed away.  Too independent.  Two households and my time and his time is important. Keeps the romance alive.
> 
> Just like now...I am doing What I want to do...  Is that selfish?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> YOU SAY"...I am doing What I want to do... Is that selfish?
> " HOW ABOUT DOING WHAT IS RIGHT?
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> Well, what is right?  Getting married?  No way!  We've only been together for 15 years.lol.  Why rush into things!
Click to expand...


Then don't cry when you see your life and the life of those around you going into the sewer.


----------



## Jackson

GISMYS said:


> Jackson said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> GISMYS said:
> 
> 
> 
> YOU SAY"...I am doing What I want to do... Is that selfish?
> " HOW ABOUT DOING WHAT IS RIGHT?
> 
> 
> 
> Well, what is right?  Getting married?  No way!  We've only been together for 15 years.lol.  Why rush into things!
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Then don't cry when you see your life and the life of those around you going into the sewer.
Click to expand...


Okay, LOL!


----------



## AquaAthena

Jackson said:


> I was married for 15 years then got my divorce and said "Never again."  Later on, I could see my self possibly living with someone, as long as I had one foot out the door.  No more attorneys, depositions, counselling appointments...no, no way!  Even then, when that came close, I backed away.  Too independent.  Two households and my time and his time is important. Keeps the romance alive.
> 
> Just like now...I am doing What I want to do...  Is that selfish?



A person is not being selfish if they choose to live life on their terms. They are only being selfish if they expect another to go along with them.


----------



## Diana1180

Androw said:


> The lowest rate of divorce is with those who have not lived together until they are married.   It's just statistics.
> 
> In your case, you should know that blended families have a massive divorce rate.   Your best bet is to stay single until the kids move on.   The Brady Bunch was fake TV crap.  Reality is, you marry some guy with kids, or when you have kids, chances are you will end up with broken hearts, and screwed up kids.   It's just a fact.   Not trying to be mean.



It is your opinion.  I come from a blended family.  A very successful one.  My dad married someone with two kids....joining with him, my brother and I (My mother was never in the picture).  Yes, I know they are hard.  

My daughter is 15.  That was my first serious (and only) relationhip in 12 years since her ftaher and I divorced.  I am not one to rush into things.


----------



## Andylusion

Diana1180 said:


> Androw said:
> 
> 
> 
> The lowest rate of divorce is with those who have not lived together until they are married.   It's just statistics.
> 
> In your case, you should know that blended families have a massive divorce rate.   Your best bet is to stay single until the kids move on.   The Brady Bunch was fake TV crap.  Reality is, you marry some guy with kids, or when you have kids, chances are you will end up with broken hearts, and screwed up kids.   It's just a fact.   Not trying to be mean.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> It is your opinion.  I come from a blended family.  A very successful one.  My dad married someone with two kids....joining with him, my brother and I (My mother was never in the picture).  Yes, I know they are hard.
> 
> My daughter is 15.  That was my first serious (and only) relationhip in 12 years since her ftaher and I divorced.  I am not one to rush into things.
Click to expand...


Of course it's possible to have a blended family and be successful.  I didn't say it was impossible, only highly unlikely.

One of the reasons your family wasn't a nightmare, is that your real mother wasn't involved.    That can drastically improve things.

The worst situation is when the ex-father/mother is still involved.

One lady was talking about how she grow up with her sisters and brothers, and they were from another man, while she was from another.   But her father was completely uninvolved.  Not sure if he was dead, or move someplace else, or what the deal was.

But the net result was that she only had one father, the one she grew up with.   Her sisters and brothers were nightmares.   Shuffling between homes, and dealing with step mothers, step siblings, and the "you're not my daddy" syndrome.

She didn't have any of that.  So she turned out fine, while her brothers and sisters, ended up with all kinds of problems.

Another problem that tends to happen, is the father tends to prefer his natural kids, over the blended kids.

Then you have mother and father, fighting over the inheritance.   I want my money going to my daughter.   Well I want the money going to my kids.   Yeah well, let their real mother/father will his money to them.

Well that's terrible and wrong, and both parents should love all their kids equally......

Didn't say it wasn't wrong, just that it was reality.

I have an uncle, who married one girl, had two kids (girl / boy) with her, divorced, and married another lady and had one girl with her.    The reasons and history leading up to this, was never made known to me.

Nevertheless, they had all kinds of hellish problems.   The son, ended up becoming and alcoholic, and was holding up quick-marts.  End in prison for years.  Thus far, I haven't seen him in over two decades.  No one knows for sure how he's doing.

The girl, ended up bouncing around from guy to guy to guy, dropped out of college, got married, divorced, stole from her parents, ended up having physical fights with her parents.  Often refused to be associated with them, and disappeared for years.

The other girl, the child they had between them, that never knew divorce or 'step' anything, turned out fine.   Got a degree in college, married a guy, has a nice family today.   Wonderful person.

Coincidence?   Possibly... but I've heard similar stories from dozens of people.  I'm glad your family turned out ok.  But I would still advice against it.   Smoking doesn't guarantee cancer, but it sure ups the chances.  So does blending families up the chances of crazy.


----------



## MeBelle

ChrisL said:


> Mad_Cabbie said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> ChrisL said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> Most women find me difficult, because I don't beat around the bush, I don't play "the game" and I am unbelievably direct.  Either they like it or they don't. Pffft. After one marriage, I sure as hell am not looking for a 2nd.
> 
> Thanks for the kind words.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> No games?  SOME games are fun.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Dating and sex has been a "game" since before humans were human. It's a game by design - even animals follow courtship "rules."
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> There are NO rules in love and war!
Click to expand...


I agree with your assesment ChrisL!   Especially when long term relationships evolve and 'outsiders', who don't care nor try to understand, apply their own set of  rules yet break the 'rules' they personally claim adherance to. ''They" end up living a double life filled with double standards. But I'm sure 'they' are very happy moving the goal posts as they see fit.


----------



## Unkotare

Statistikhengst said:


> Most women find me difficult, because I don't beat around the bush....




Stop kidding yourself. They find you to be an obnoxious loser. 

























They are correct.


----------



## ChrisL

MeBelle60 said:


> ChrisL said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Mad_Cabbie said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> ChrisL said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> Most women find me difficult, because I don't beat around the bush, I don't play "the game" and I am unbelievably direct.  Either they like it or they don't. Pffft. After one marriage, I sure as hell am not looking for a 2nd.
> 
> Thanks for the kind words.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> No games?  SOME games are fun.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Dating and sex has been a "game" since before humans were human. It's a game by design - even animals follow courtship "rules."
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> There are NO rules in love and war!
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I agree with your assesment ChrisL!   Especially when long term relationships evolve and 'outsiders', who don't care nor try to understand, apply their own set of  rules yet break the 'rules' they personally claim adherance to. ''They" end up living a double life filled with double standards. But I'm sure 'they' are very happy moving the goal posts as they see fit.
Click to expand...


You also should watch out for people who want to set "rules" for you.  That's scary.  Lol!


----------



## MeBelle

ChrisL said:


> MeBelle60 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> ChrisL said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Mad_Cabbie said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> ChrisL said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Statistikhengst said:
> 
> 
> 
> Most women find me difficult, because I don't beat around the bush, I don't play "the game" and I am unbelievably direct.  Either they like it or they don't. Pffft. After one marriage, I sure as hell am not looking for a 2nd.
> 
> Thanks for the kind words.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> No games?  SOME games are fun.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Dating and sex has been a "game" since before humans were human. It's a game by design - even animals follow courtship "rules."
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> There are NO rules in love and war!
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> I agree with your assesment ChrisL!   Especially when long term relationships evolve and 'outsiders', who don't care nor try to understand, apply their own set of  rules yet break the 'rules' they personally claim adherance to. ''They" end up living a double life filled with double standards. But I'm sure 'they' are very happy moving the goal posts as they see fit.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> You also should watch out for people who want to set "rules" for you.  That's scary.  Lol!
Click to expand...


Thankfully, I don't have to deal with the  narcissistic personality disorder type!  They love to set rules, break rules and will even pit people againnst each other,  It's one of the most bizarre disorders I've ever worked with!


----------



## Unkotare

CharlieH said:


> Is there any skirt on here..?




Besides you?


----------



## Hollie

Unkotare said:


> CharlieH said:
> 
> 
> 
> Is there any skirt on here..?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Besides you?
Click to expand...

You're jealous.


----------



## Diana1180

lol...skirt?


----------



## Andylusion

Wow!  You guys still trying to find a date on the online political forum?   I thought this thread was closed lol


----------



## High_Gravity

Still here still single, although I have been seeing this girl for the last few weeks.


----------



## High_Gravity

Well that didn't last long, totally single again lol.


----------



## Diana1180

lol..happens to the best of us.


----------



## High_Gravity

All the good ones are taken.


----------



## Diana1180

Taken or have commitment issues.


----------



## High_Gravity

smh.


----------



## Andylusion

Yeah.... this is why you get married young, and stick it out.

You men.... what are you thinking?   You get used to living the single life, and then trying to merge two people's lives into one, is hell on earth.   You end up miserable.   

You chicks...  what are you thinking?   A:  The guys who want to be married, are already married.    B:  The guys who are not married, are not married for a reason.  They just want a free ride that doesn't cost a ring to get on.   It's not a commitment issue.  It's a choice.

Worse yet.... and this is going to piss you girls off, but it's the truth, I'm just a messenger.     A guy that is single until he's in his 30s, and then decides to get married and settle down.... that guy isn't looking for you 30+ chicks.   He's looking at the 20-year-old chicks.

Want to know who a 30+ year old chick looks good to?  A 50 year old guy.   40 year old chick, 60 year old guy.   I'm just a messenger.
Girls, the flower wilts.   Sexy has a shelf life, and guys are visually stimulated.

Ever wonder why you meet these crazy desperate 35 year old chicks who are shacked up with a crazy guy that treats them like dirt?  This is why, right here.    They know the flower has wilted, and they can't find anyone, so they settle for trash.  I've seen it with my own eyes.

Stop telling your kids to wait until they are in their 30s to get married.  It's a nightmare for them.


----------



## Disir

I'm single by choice. I'm not looking either.  There is entirely too much fun shit to do and see.  And batteries.


----------



## Andylusion

And that's perfectly fine.  I'm single myself, and have no intention of getting married thank the Lord.  Likely a good thing all around.

But.... for those who do wish to have a family, and kids, and love / romance and all that garbage....  Stop waiting around.  Candles look great when they are first lit... but they get drippy and warped really quick.   The sexy flame doesn't last forever.

It just bugs me when I meet these chicks who wait until they are 38 to get married because "There is entirely too much fun stuff to do and see", and then can't find anyone and start complaining "all the good guys are taken, or they have commitment issues".

Well dur....  yeah.   Most good guys that wants a family.... they are not waiting until they are 38.  They are going to find a girl, and get on with life.

The only ones left at 38, are the guys who either don't want to be married, but want a free ride, or they have problems that make them unable to hold a marriage.  Or worse, have divorced so many times, they have enough baggage to ground a 747.

And the extremely few that are good, and do want to marry.... they are not looking for girl in her 40s or close to it.  *shrug*   Clue phone you girls!  It's for you.   If you DO want to be married..> GET ON WITH IT <


----------



## Muhammed

Disir said:


> I'm single by choice. I'm not looking either.  There is entirely too much fun shit to do and see.  And batteries.


I wasn't looking to get married either. 2 years ago if you would have said I would get married I would have laughed at you.


----------



## Disir

Muhammed said:


> Disir said:
> 
> 
> 
> I'm single by choice. I'm not looking either.  There is entirely too much fun shit to do and see.  And batteries.
> 
> 
> 
> I wasn't looking to get married either. 2 years ago if you would have said I would get married I would have laughed at you.
Click to expand...


Sucker!!!


----------



## Disir

Andylusion said:


> And that's perfectly fine.  I'm single myself, and have no intention of getting married thank the Lord.  Likely a good thing all around.
> 
> But.... for those who do wish to have a family, and kids, and love / romance and all that garbage....  Stop waiting around.  Candles look great when they are first lit... but they get drippy and warped really quick.   The sexy flame doesn't last forever.
> 
> It just bugs me when I meet these chicks who wait until they are 38 to get married because "There is entirely too much fun stuff to do and see", and then can't find anyone and start complaining "all the good guys are taken, or they have commitment issues".
> 
> Well dur....  yeah.   Most good guys that wants a family.... they are not waiting until they are 38.  They are going to find a girl, and get on with life.
> 
> The only ones left at 38, are the guys who either don't want to be married, but want a free ride, or they have problems that make them unable to hold a marriage.  Or worse, have divorced so many times, they have enough baggage to ground a 747.
> 
> And the extremely few that are good, and do want to marry.... they are not looking for girl in her 40s or close to it.  *shrug*   Clue phone you girls!  It's for you.   If you DO want to be married..> GET ON WITH IT <



I see people that are with someone simply because they don't want to be alone.  They settle.  That's pretty much what you are asking them to do.  Your message is hurry up and find someone. Anyone. Then they are miserable but don't leave or wait until it's an explosive situation and create unnecessary drama. 

Now once upon a time people got married because that is what you did. Love was not a part of the picture.  You really did settle.  But, you knew this at the beginning and this is what you expected.  I don't think this made people happier.  I do think that this is what we now would call lowered expectations.

Then there are people who get married right out of high school or college because that is what society tells them to do. Then they wake up 20 years later asking, "Who chose this life?" It's a midlife crisis, Then they are back on the dating scene at 38 and up.   

Society is funny.  There is no winning by playing by a bunch of obscure and imaginary rules that create ludicrous expectations of what a partner should be.


----------



## Andylusion

Disir said:


> Andylusion said:
> 
> 
> 
> And that's perfectly fine.  I'm single myself, and have no intention of getting married thank the Lord.  Likely a good thing all around.
> 
> But.... for those who do wish to have a family, and kids, and love / romance and all that garbage....  Stop waiting around.  Candles look great when they are first lit... but they get drippy and warped really quick.   The sexy flame doesn't last forever.
> 
> It just bugs me when I meet these chicks who wait until they are 38 to get married because "There is entirely too much fun stuff to do and see", and then can't find anyone and start complaining "all the good guys are taken, or they have commitment issues".
> 
> Well dur....  yeah.   Most good guys that wants a family.... they are not waiting until they are 38.  They are going to find a girl, and get on with life.
> 
> The only ones left at 38, are the guys who either don't want to be married, but want a free ride, or they have problems that make them unable to hold a marriage.  Or worse, have divorced so many times, they have enough baggage to ground a 747.
> 
> And the extremely few that are good, and do want to marry.... they are not looking for girl in her 40s or close to it.  *shrug*   Clue phone you girls!  It's for you.   If you DO want to be married..> GET ON WITH IT <
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I see people that are with someone simply because they don't want to be alone.  They settle.  That's pretty much what you are asking them to do.  Your message is hurry up and find someone. Anyone. Then they are miserable but don't leave or wait until it's an explosive situation and create unnecessary drama.
> 
> Now once upon a time people got married because that is what you did. Love was not a part of the picture.  You really did settle.  But, you knew this at the beginning and this is what you expected.  I don't think this made people happier.  I do think that this is what we now would call lowered expectations.
> 
> Then there are people who get married right out of high school or college because that is what society tells them to do. Then they wake up 20 years later asking, "Who chose this life?" It's a midlife crisis, Then they are back on the dating scene at 38 and up.
> 
> Society is funny.  There is no winning by playing by a bunch of obscure and imaginary rules that create ludicrous expectations of what a partner should be.
Click to expand...


*I'm not sure what you are talking about*.  Society doesn't say 'get married out of high school'.   At least that's not what I hear from parents, or kids, from any group of people I've ever been around.

Society says wait wait wait.  Wait until you are out of high school, wait until you are through college, wait until you have a career, and money, and a home, and a car and and and and and and and do all the fun stuff you want, and travel the world, and blaw blaw blaw blaw.

I've met parents that literally threatened their kids to not get married.

It's certainly not in the media.  The media portrays marriage as this horrible life ruining thing, and the single-hot-sexy-life as the cool in-crowd "all the kool kids do it" thing.

So I really don't know what you are talking about.  Must be something local to where you are.

*Second, yeah I agree with the lowered expectations*.   Everyone should have lower expectations of others, and higher expectations of themselves.

In fact, there is some research out there that shows women with high expectations, are the miserable women.   Women who had very low expectations of marriage and their husbands, by their own statements, were much happier with their married life.   It's the women waiting for perfect prince charming, that end up miserable.

*Third, no, it is not my belief that you should just "find someone, anyone".*  That is not what I advocate.   That is in fact, what happens, when you don't find someone.

You wait wait wait wait wait, and women get to this point where they feel the clock ticking, and they hop on the first guy that gives them the time of day, and then they end up in a world of hurt.

To all you women that in fact want to be married.... get them while they are young.  Get the boys before they have screwed themselves up.   Get them before they are hooked on porn, screwed a dozen different girls, and have lived as a single unmarried man so long that they are set in their ways.

By the time you girls are in your mid-30s, most of the guys that are still interested in you at that age..... are all damaged goods.

That's when these women get desperate, and go down the "find someone, anyone" route.

My suggestion.... find someone when you are still your most attractive, and when there are still guys who are worth getting.

Now if you are like me.... never had a girl friend, and never wanted one, and have no interest in marrying.... great.  Peachy.  Enjoy your life.   Nothing wrong with being single.

But if you want a marriage, then clocks ticking.  Pretty soon you'll only get interest from 60-year-old guys, and creeps, because that's all that will be left.

*Lastly, drama is not generally a marriage problem.*  Drama is a "I want to be in charge" problem.   Drama is an arrogance problem.

Have you ever been in an organization where there was no one in charge?   I have actually seen this.   A committee meeting where there is no chair-person.  No "head-(person)" in charge.

Want to know what happens?   People fight.   Why do people fight in that situation?   Because all of them feel they have equal right to have their own way.  Why should we all do it your way, when you have the same level of authority as me?

And you equally are saying the same thing about me.  Why should you do it my way, when I have no more authority than you?

So what happens is, we just fight and butt-heads, and drama.

Research shows that happy married couples have just as many arguments, as unhappy couples that divorce.

The difference is merely that in the couples that are happy... someone submits to the other.  Someone is given the final call.  And it's usually the husband.

Someone has to be head of the household.   The reason there is drama, is because people have bought into this modern nonsense that you can have a happy household where everyone has equal say.   That's is absolutely impossible.   You will never be happy in a relationship where you and one other, believe you both have 100% equal say, because if I want A and you want B, and both of us believe we have 100% equal say in which one we do.... the only possible outcome is drama, fighting and divorce.

I've actually witnessed that first hand too.  Two people, and both thought they had complete authority in their home.  All they did was fight until the marriage was ruined and over. 

The only happy couples that ever exist, are ones where someone says "Well I don't want that, but we'll do it your way" instead of Burger King "I want it my way".

And to anyone who might be reading this, if that's your life motto... save yourself years of pain and misery... stay single.


----------



## Disir

Andylusion said:


> Disir said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Andylusion said:
> 
> 
> 
> And that's perfectly fine.  I'm single myself, and have no intention of getting married thank the Lord.  Likely a good thing all around.
> 
> But.... for those who do wish to have a family, and kids, and love / romance and all that garbage....  Stop waiting around.  Candles look great when they are first lit... but they get drippy and warped really quick.   The sexy flame doesn't last forever.
> 
> It just bugs me when I meet these chicks who wait until they are 38 to get married because "There is entirely too much fun stuff to do and see", and then can't find anyone and start complaining "all the good guys are taken, or they have commitment issues".
> 
> Well dur....  yeah.   Most good guys that wants a family.... they are not waiting until they are 38.  They are going to find a girl, and get on with life.
> 
> The only ones left at 38, are the guys who either don't want to be married, but want a free ride, or they have problems that make them unable to hold a marriage.  Or worse, have divorced so many times, they have enough baggage to ground a 747.
> 
> And the extremely few that are good, and do want to marry.... they are not looking for girl in her 40s or close to it.  *shrug*   Clue phone you girls!  It's for you.   If you DO want to be married..> GET ON WITH IT <
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I see people that are with someone simply because they don't want to be alone.  They settle.  That's pretty much what you are asking them to do.  Your message is hurry up and find someone. Anyone. Then they are miserable but don't leave or wait until it's an explosive situation and create unnecessary drama.
> 
> Now once upon a time people got married because that is what you did. Love was not a part of the picture.  You really did settle.  But, you knew this at the beginning and this is what you expected.  I don't think this made people happier.  I do think that this is what we now would call lowered expectations.
> 
> Then there are people who get married right out of high school or college because that is what society tells them to do. Then they wake up 20 years later asking, "Who chose this life?" It's a midlife crisis, Then they are back on the dating scene at 38 and up.
> 
> Society is funny.  There is no winning by playing by a bunch of obscure and imaginary rules that create ludicrous expectations of what a partner should be.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> *I'm not sure what you are talking about*.  Society doesn't say 'get married out of high school'.   At least that's not what I hear from parents, or kids, from any group of people I've ever been around.
> 
> Society says wait wait wait.  Wait until you are out of high school, wait until you are through college, wait until you have a career, and money, and a home, and a car and and and and and and and do all the fun stuff you want, and travel the world, and blaw blaw blaw blaw.
> 
> I've met parents that literally threatened their kids to not get married.
> 
> It's certainly not in the media.  The media portrays marriage as this horrible life ruining thing, and the single-hot-sexy-life as the cool in-crowd "all the kool kids do it" thing.
> 
> So I really don't know what you are talking about.  Must be something local to where you are.
> 
> *Second, yeah I agree with the lowered expectations*.   Everyone should have lower expectations of others, and higher expectations of themselves.
> 
> In fact, there is some research out there that shows women with high expectations, are the miserable women.   Women who had very low expectations of marriage and their husbands, by their own statements, were much happier with their married life.   It's the women waiting for perfect prince charming, that end up miserable.
> 
> *Third, no, it is not my belief that you should just "find someone, anyone".*  That is not what I advocate.   That is in fact, what happens, when you don't find someone.
> 
> You wait wait wait wait wait, and women get to this point where they feel the clock ticking, and they hop on the first guy that gives them the time of day, and then they end up in a world of hurt.
> 
> To all you women that in fact want to be married.... get them while they are young.  Get the boys before they have screwed themselves up.   Get them before they are hooked on porn, screwed a dozen different girls, and have lived as a single unmarried man so long that they are set in their ways.
> 
> By the time you girls are in your mid-30s, most of the guys that are still interested in you at that age..... are all damaged goods.
> 
> That's when these women get desperate, and go down the "find someone, anyone" route.
> 
> My suggestion.... find someone when you are still your most attractive, and when there are still guys who are worth getting.
> 
> Now if you are like me.... never had a girl friend, and never wanted one, and have no interest in marrying.... great.  Peachy.  Enjoy your life.   Nothing wrong with being single.
> 
> But if you want a marriage, then clocks ticking.  Pretty soon you'll only get interest from 60-year-old guys, and creeps, because that's all that will be left.
> 
> *Lastly, drama is not generally a marriage problem.*  Drama is a "I want to be in charge" problem.   Drama is an arrogance problem.
> 
> Have you ever been in an organization where there was no one in charge?   I have actually seen this.   A committee meeting where there is no chair-person.  No "head-(person)" in charge.
> 
> Want to know what happens?   People fight.   Why do people fight in that situation?   Because all of them feel they have equal right to have their own way.  Why should we all do it your way, when you have the same level of authority as me?
> 
> And you equally are saying the same thing about me.  Why should you do it my way, when I have no more authority than you?
> 
> So what happens is, we just fight and butt-heads, and drama.
> 
> Research shows that happy married couples have just as many arguments, as unhappy couples that divorce.
> 
> The difference is merely that in the couples that are happy... someone submits to the other.  Someone is given the final call.  And it's usually the husband.
> 
> Someone has to be head of the household.   The reason there is drama, is because people have bought into this modern nonsense that you can have a happy household where everyone has equal say.   That's is absolutely impossible.   You will never be happy in a relationship where you and one other, believe you both have 100% equal say, because if I want A and you want B, and both of us believe we have 100% equal say in which one we do.... the only possible outcome is drama, fighting and divorce.
> 
> I've actually witnessed that first hand too.  Two people, and both thought they had complete authority in their home.  All they did was fight until the marriage was ruined and over.
> 
> The only happy couples that ever exist, are ones where someone says "Well I don't want that, but we'll do it your way" instead of Burger King "I want it my way".
> 
> And to anyone who might be reading this, if that's your life motto... save yourself years of pain and misery... stay single.
Click to expand...


Society sure does say get married out of high school. Many people don't go to college. They are not expected to go to college.  You ARE expected to marry.  You ARE expected to "settle down". In fact, you start getting signals very young.  Kitchen sets, play houses, church, etc. Then it shows up in movies, television shows, etc. What's the message? It isn't fly solo.  Hence,  the midlife crisis. 

The television absolutely focuses on family.  When they do a dysfunctional family the world goes ..........ooooh, look, it's a dysfunctional family on the telly. Problems are solved in 37 minutes. Or you have shows that focus on very young couples buying a house. 

And guess what? It's men that are happier in marriages. Not women. Drama comes from settling.  It comes when you find out that the person that you thought you wanted to attract is really not at all compatible with who you are............and/or who you have become.  And it usually stems from portraying yourself in a manner that is not who you really are to begin with.  It also comes from money issues and/or affairs and crap like that. 

Wearing the pants in the family my ass.

Historically people have gotten married later in life, then younger in life and then later in life depending on wars etc. In fact, many people waited until they had enough money to marry.  So, the whole ZOMG people are waiting longer is overrated.


----------



## High_Gravity

So when I say that all the good ones are taken, it is true.


----------



## Diana1180

Taken...or gay... or lives 3000 miles from you.


----------



## High_Gravity

Andylusion said:


> Yeah.... this is why you get married young, and stick it out.
> 
> You men.... what are you thinking?   You get used to living the single life, and then trying to merge two people's lives into one, is hell on earth.   You end up miserable.
> 
> You chicks...  what are you thinking?   A:  The guys who want to be married, are already married.    B:  The guys who are not married, are not married for a reason.  They just want a free ride that doesn't cost a ring to get on.   It's not a commitment issue.  It's a choice.
> 
> Worse yet.... and this is going to piss you girls off, but it's the truth, I'm just a messenger.     A guy that is single until he's in his 30s, and then decides to get married and settle down.... that guy isn't looking for you 30+ chicks.   He's looking at the 20-year-old chicks.
> 
> Want to know who a 30+ year old chick looks good to?  A 50 year old guy.   40 year old chick, 60 year old guy.   I'm just a messenger.
> Girls, the flower wilts.   Sexy has a shelf life, and guys are visually stimulated.
> 
> Ever wonder why you meet these crazy desperate 35 year old chicks who are shacked up with a crazy guy that treats them like dirt?  This is why, right here.    They know the flower has wilted, and they can't find anyone, so they settle for trash.  I've seen it with my own eyes.
> 
> Stop telling your kids to wait until they are in their 30s to get married.  It's a nightmare for them.


 
I am 33 years old and I have been single for 3 years and from what I have seen you are 100% correct, every woman that wants a relationship or marriage is already doing so.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> Taken...or gay... or lives 3000 miles from you.


 
Your damn right, I met an amazing girl on Facebook but she lived in Utah and I live in Virginia, she was going to fly out and meet me but she met a lawyer and is now engaged to him SMMFH.


----------



## High_Gravity

I also met an amazing Latina on a night out with a friend in October, of course she was gay


----------



## Diana1180

Well I have been seeing a guy I dated like 6-7 years ago... don't ask me why.


----------



## High_Gravity

Diana1180 said:


> Well I have been seeing a guy I dated like 6-7 years ago... don't ask me why.


 
Good luck.


----------



## Diana1180

I have a feeling it is going the same route as it did then.  Great guy, have a blast together, good chemistry.... but ... he has said that he still doesnt feel he "is in a good place" to put in the time a relationship deserves.  Which is the issue we had before.

But I enjoy his company and we have fun when we go out so I am good with it for now...


----------



## High_Gravity

Sometimes thats all you can ask for, I'd just go with that until something else comes along.


----------



## Andylusion

High_Gravity said:


> So when I say that all the good ones are taken, it is true.



Yeah, generally.

Ironically just today, I heard two stories, that were exactly what I'm talking about.   Listening to a radio call-in show, a lady calls in, and she is early 40s, and just married a guy early 40s.

She comes on... well he blows money whenever he wants, we have to keep separate accounts because he's irresponsible with money, he borrows money we can't really afford to, and says he can declare bankruptcy if the worst happens, and he has terrible habits and says he's not going to change them.....    Oh but he's a really really nice guy, and very sweet.

Did you all catch that?   He's in his 40s.  He's been living as a single guy for 20 years or more.

You think that dude is going to merge his life with this girl?  OF course not.  He's set in his life habits.  He's not changing anything at the age of 40+.

So the girl is miserable.   Well why is she with him?    Because she's desperate.  She's single in her 40s, and is desperate.   She doesn't want a guy in his 60s, and all the good guys her age, are married, or dating girls in their 20s and 30s.   So she's stuck with this guy, and he's set in his ways, are they are miserable.

Then there was this chick dating a guy who was 38, and she was talking about how he sits around on the sofa.   We dated for 2 years and he doesn't seem to want to improve his life at all.   He's happy just watching TV, and can't hold a job, or build a career.  How can I make him improve?

Duh.... you can't.   He's 38 now.   He's comfortable with the way he lives now.   Your chance to influence how this guy grows up into a man, ended almost 20 years ago.

It reminded me of a third story of a girl, again in her 40s, married a dude in his 40s.  After just one week of living in the same house, they had a huge fight, he packed his stuff, and went home.

Huh?    So they started digging for information, this dude was still living with his mother.     You find a guy who has lived with his mother for 40 years, and you think he's not extremely set in his ways?   You think you are going to merge lives with this guy?

Why did this girl even consider this man?   Because she's in her 40s.  She can't find anyone.  The guys that are good, are either already married, or they are looking at girls in their 20s and 30s.  Not some 40+ year old chick.  The only ones left are creeps, or screwed up like this dude.

I had to laugh when I was listening to the radio.   Coincidence for sure, but that's a good random chance to have these stories pop up just after talking on this thread.


----------



## Andylusion

High_Gravity said:


> I also met an amazing Latina on a night out with a friend in October, of course she was gay



It's a sad thing.   If at all possible..... and sometimes it isn't....  I would argue that you should try and restore the marriage you had.   It's much easier to fix the crazy you know, than it is to fix crazy you never knew.

You will always have more influence with your original spouse, than you ever will with that new chick you think is great.

And by the way... Facebook, and internet romance is the absolute most deceptive type of relationship you can possibly have.

People can lie and deceive you in person for sure.   Over the internet.... when you don't know almost anything about them (except for the mask of deception they put on facebook), the chances of them being something completely different than what you think they are is a MILLION times higher.

I highly doubt you have lost nearly as much as you think with that other chick who went after the lawyer.   

If you really want crazy advice, find a really good church, and ask someone to match you on a date with some of the single chicks there.  I know that sounds insane at first glance, but I have actually seen that work.


----------



## Andylusion

Diana1180 said:


> I have a feeling it is going the same route as it did then.  Great guy, have a blast together, good chemistry.... but ... he has said that he still doesnt feel he "is in a good place" to put in the time a relationship deserves.  Which is the issue we had before.
> 
> But I enjoy his company and we have fun when we go out so I am good with it for now...



First, I have no idea about you, or him, or your relationship.

But I would warn you of one thing.   I've seen this before with other men specifically.   It's a man thing.

If you, as woman, are available to him, whenever he wants to go out......   You are basically an unpaid adult escort.

*IF*... I don't know the situation.   Just based on what you said right there... you are a call girl that isn't paid.

And here's the kicker.   If he knows he can call you up whenever he wants you, and doesn't have to make any commitments, and you'll "go away" until the next time he calls.......  

Please don't be mad, I'm just saying what I've seen....

.... He will never "feel he is in a good place to put in the time a relationship deserves"...... when doesn't have to.   And right now... he doesn't have to.   He can call his call-girl whenever he wants, and enjoy the company of a women when he wants it, and doesn't have to put any time into a real relationship that requires commitment.

And here's the other thing.... as long as you are "with" him whenever he calls for a night out... your chances of finding a man that wants something real.... very low.

Again, don't be mad.  Just saying what I have seen.  Just a messenger.


----------



## Diana1180

Lol wow. You are just a ray of sunshine. 

I am actually ok with what it is now. We hang out when both our calendars permit it. I am not always available to him. He knows that I am not putting my dating life on hold hoping he will come around.  He has always been a great guy. But I know his commitment issues. And I know it will probably never be a "good" time in his life. He is 43. As you said. Why change things if he is happy with having no commitment. I get that. He isn't the only one getting something out of this arrangement.


----------



## Disir

Knock it off, Diana. You're supposed to be crushed. Just lay down in the fetal position and die already.


----------



## Muhammed

Personally, At 46, I met a 24 year old university student at a grocery store where she worked part time.

She moved in with me within a month and we were married in less than half a year.


----------



## High_Gravity

Andylusion said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> So when I say that all the good ones are taken, it is true.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Yeah, generally.
> 
> Ironically just today, I heard two stories, that were exactly what I'm talking about.   Listening to a radio call-in show, a lady calls in, and she is early 40s, and just married a guy early 40s.
> 
> She comes on... well he blows money whenever he wants, we have to keep separate accounts because he's irresponsible with money, he borrows money we can't really afford to, and says he can declare bankruptcy if the worst happens, and he has terrible habits and says he's not going to change them.....    Oh but he's a really really nice guy, and very sweet.
> 
> Did you all catch that?   He's in his 40s.  He's been living as a single guy for 20 years or more.
> 
> You think that dude is going to merge his life with this girl?  OF course not.  He's set in his life habits.  He's not changing anything at the age of 40+.
> 
> So the girl is miserable.   Well why is she with him?    Because she's desperate.  She's single in her 40s, and is desperate.   She doesn't want a guy in his 60s, and all the good guys her age, are married, or dating girls in their 20s and 30s.   So she's stuck with this guy, and he's set in his ways, are they are miserable.
> 
> Then there was this chick dating a guy who was 38, and she was talking about how he sits around on the sofa.   We dated for 2 years and he doesn't seem to want to improve his life at all.   He's happy just watching TV, and can't hold a job, or build a career.  How can I make him improve?
> 
> Duh.... you can't.   He's 38 now.   He's comfortable with the way he lives now.   Your chance to influence how this guy grows up into a man, ended almost 20 years ago.
> 
> It reminded me of a third story of a girl, again in her 40s, married a dude in his 40s.  After just one week of living in the same house, they had a huge fight, he packed his stuff, and went home.
> 
> Huh?    So they started digging for information, this dude was still living with his mother.     You find a guy who has lived with his mother for 40 years, and you think he's not extremely set in his ways?   You think you are going to merge lives with this guy?
> 
> Why did this girl even consider this man?   Because she's in her 40s.  She can't find anyone.  The guys that are good, are either already married, or they are looking at girls in their 20s and 30s.  Not some 40+ year old chick.  The only ones left are creeps, or screwed up like this dude.
> 
> I had to laugh when I was listening to the radio.   Coincidence for sure, but that's a good random chance to have these stories pop up just after talking on this thread.
Click to expand...

 
Well, you pretty much hit a home run witht this one I think. Nobody in their late 30s or early 40s is going to go through a renaissance and completely change for another person. I got married when I was 19, way too young and divorced 5 years later, we both cheated on each other and were angry and just cut it off, maybe I should have tried harder to save the marriage, meeting people in your 30s is much harder than meeting someone in your 20s.


----------



## High_Gravity

Andylusion said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> I also met an amazing Latina on a night out with a friend in October, of course she was gay
> 
> 
> 
> 
> It's a sad thing.   If at all possible..... and sometimes it isn't....  I would argue that you should try and restore the marriage you had.   It's much easier to fix the crazy you know, than it is to fix crazy you never knew.
> 
> You will always have more influence with your original spouse, than you ever will with that new chick you think is great.
> 
> And by the way... Facebook, and internet romance is the absolute most deceptive type of relationship you can possibly have.
> 
> People can lie and deceive you in person for sure.   Over the internet.... when you don't know almost anything about them (except for the mask of deception they put on facebook), the chances of them being something completely different than what you think they are is a MILLION times higher.
> 
> I highly doubt you have lost nearly as much as you think with that other chick who went after the lawyer.
> 
> If you really want crazy advice, find a really good church, and ask someone to match you on a date with some of the single chicks there.  I know that sounds insane at first glance, but I have actually seen that work.
Click to expand...

 
Oh I agree with you 100%, I may flirt with women on line but I don't believe in long distance relationships via online or whatever, I can't invest in something that I can't see or touch.


----------



## High_Gravity

Andylusion said:


> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> I have a feeling it is going the same route as it did then.  Great guy, have a blast together, good chemistry.... but ... he has said that he still doesnt feel he "is in a good place" to put in the time a relationship deserves.  Which is the issue we had before.
> 
> But I enjoy his company and we have fun when we go out so I am good with it for now...
> 
> 
> 
> 
> First, I have no idea about you, or him, or your relationship.
> 
> But I would warn you of one thing.   I've seen this before with other men specifically.   It's a man thing.
> 
> If you, as woman, are available to him, whenever he wants to go out......   You are basically an unpaid adult escort.
> 
> *IF*... I don't know the situation.   Just based on what you said right there... you are a call girl that isn't paid.
> 
> And here's the kicker.   If he knows he can call you up whenever he wants you, and doesn't have to make any commitments, and you'll "go away" until the next time he calls.......
> 
> Please don't be mad, I'm just saying what I've seen....
> 
> .... He will never "feel he is in a good place to put in the time a relationship deserves"...... when doesn't have to.   And right now... he doesn't have to.   He can call his call-girl whenever he wants, and enjoy the company of a women when he wants it, and doesn't have to put any time into a real relationship that requires commitment.
> 
> And here's the other thing.... as long as you are "with" him whenever he calls for a night out... your chances of finding a man that wants something real.... very low.
> 
> Again, don't be mad.  Just saying what I have seen.  Just a messenger.
Click to expand...

 
Well I wouldnt go as far as to call her an escort per say, but yeah if a man gets to have the same kind of fun you get in a relationship like hanging out, sex etc without actually being commited than yes its a big win for the man, and he will not want to commit, why should he? but if shes fine with it, their good to go I guess.


----------



## Andylusion

Diana1180 said:


> Lol wow. You are just a ray of sunshine.
> 
> I am actually ok with what it is now. We hang out when both our calendars permit it. I am not always available to him. He knows that I am not putting my dating life on hold hoping he will come around.  He has always been a great guy. But I know his commitment issues. And I know it will probably never be a "good" time in his life. He is 43. As you said. Why change things if he is happy with having no commitment. I get that. He isn't the only one getting something out of this arrangement.



Ok cool.    Like I said, I don't know you or him.

But I have seen these women that think they have this 'thing', and don't realize they are simply being used.   Many think "If I date him, and go out with him, and blaw blaw blaw for him... he'll eventually come around."... and that simply isn't true.   The more you put yourself out for a man, the less and less reason he has to commit.

I could almost guarantee you, that if you ditched your friend, and every woman he knew ditched him, so that he was totally alone.........   I would bet you money....  that all of a sudden he would find "it's a good time to commit now".

In fact, it just occurred to me that I saw this years ago.  There was a guy I knew, mid-20, he was a teacher and taught at the same school my father taught at.  He was dating this chick for 2 or 3 years.  Dated all the time.  Never interested in marrying.   The girl decided to call it off.  Three months later, he called her up, asked her out, on the following date after that, he put a ring on her finger and proposed.

2 or 3 years didn't "feel" the time was right.  Four months no girl friend, no dates, no phone calls.... suddenly he "feels" the time is right.

Coincidence?   I don't think so.    Been married ever since.    I just remembered that just now.


----------



## Andylusion

High_Gravity said:


> Andylusion said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> I have a feeling it is going the same route as it did then.  Great guy, have a blast together, good chemistry.... but ... he has said that he still doesnt feel he "is in a good place" to put in the time a relationship deserves.  Which is the issue we had before.
> 
> But I enjoy his company and we have fun when we go out so I am good with it for now...
> 
> 
> 
> 
> First, I have no idea about you, or him, or your relationship.
> 
> But I would warn you of one thing.   I've seen this before with other men specifically.   It's a man thing.
> 
> If you, as woman, are available to him, whenever he wants to go out......   You are basically an unpaid adult escort.
> 
> *IF*... I don't know the situation.   Just based on what you said right there... you are a call girl that isn't paid.
> 
> And here's the kicker.   If he knows he can call you up whenever he wants you, and doesn't have to make any commitments, and you'll "go away" until the next time he calls.......
> 
> Please don't be mad, I'm just saying what I've seen....
> 
> .... He will never "feel he is in a good place to put in the time a relationship deserves"...... when doesn't have to.   And right now... he doesn't have to.   He can call his call-girl whenever he wants, and enjoy the company of a women when he wants it, and doesn't have to put any time into a real relationship that requires commitment.
> 
> And here's the other thing.... as long as you are "with" him whenever he calls for a night out... your chances of finding a man that wants something real.... very low.
> 
> Again, don't be mad.  Just saying what I have seen.  Just a messenger.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Well I wouldnt go as far as to call her an escort per say, but yeah if a man gets to have the same kind of fun you get in a relationship like hanging out, sex etc without actually being commited than yes its a big win for the man, and he will not want to commit, why should he? but if shes fine with it, their good to go I guess.
Click to expand...


For men, this is how they see it.   But women, it's different.  A woman may claim that's all she wants... but that's normally not true.

Many times I've seen it where the woman says she's completely happy with the commitment-less relationship... but then they are miserable.

There's a girl (I'll call her Tammy since she didn't give me permission to share this), and she had exactly this kind of relationship.  Tammy hung out with this guy for 3 years.   Then, he found someone else.   Which if Tammy really believed that a commitment-less relationship was fine... she would have just accepted that and moved on.   Instead Tammy had a mental break down, and ended up on anti-depressants and 3 years of counseling.

Another girl (Linda I'll call her), was with another guy for 3 years.  They joked about how they didn't need marriage or commitment.  Linda even joked about marriage.   Then the guy found another girl, and moved out.   Linda became the most angry bitter person you ever met.     She never really was the same after that.

Guy can deal with this floating relationship a ton easier than woman.  They say they don't need commitment, but most of them really want something solid and secure, and while you think it's a safe perfectly fine open relationship, you are actually really harming these women.  They are not designed for flings and short relationships.


----------



## Diana1180

Oh I have no doubt what you say is true..because I went thru it with him last time.  7 years ago, I would put things on hold for him..always be available and it went no where.  

I was recently in the hospital for 3 months and this is when he started coming around again to see how I was doing..that got to us talking every day, then him coming to help set up my TV while I was sick.  Then to him coming over at least once a week for dinner.  This time around I have let him contact me and make the plans.  I don't ask him and I don't always say yes.  I am about 80% sure he dates others.  We have talked about one lady and he says "she wants more than I can give right now"...ok, same line he used on me 7 years ago lol. 

But for some reason this time around he is more proactive.  I don't know if he is realizing what your friend did.  He will end up alone.  He asked me to wine tours, ball games, away for weekends.  He drives an hour and a half to see me.  Is it confusing sometimes?  yes.  But he is still friend zoned in my mind because I don't think he will change in his "fear" of commitment.  When somebody tells you something... believe them.  Cant change their minds.


----------



## Diana1180

Andylusion said:


> For men, this is how they see it.   But women, it's different.  A woman may claim that's all she wants... but that's normally not true.
> 
> Many times I've seen it where the woman says she's completely happy with the commitment-less relationship... but then they are miserable.
> 
> There's a girl (I'll call her Tammy since she didn't give me permission to share this), and she had exactly this kind of relationship.  Tammy hung out with this guy for 3 years.   Then, he found someone else.   Which if Tammy really believed that a commitment-less relationship was fine... she would have just accepted that and moved on.   Instead Tammy had a mental break down, and ended up on anti-depressants and 3 years of counseling.
> 
> Another girl (Linda I'll call her), was with another guy for 3 years.  They joked about how they didn't need marriage or commitment.  Linda even joked about marriage.   Then the guy found another girl, and moved out.   Linda became the most angry bitter person you ever met.     She never really was the same after that.
> 
> Guy can deal with this floating relationship a ton easier than woman.  They say they don't need commitment, but most of them really want something solid and secure, and while you think it's a safe perfectly fine open relationship, you are actually really harming these women.  They are not designed for flings and short relationships.



oh trust me.. I wont be good with this for years.  I DO want a relationship eventually.  And I haven't stopped looking for one because I enjoy this guys company.  Like I said, he is a great guy.  But I wont pass up a date with a potential Mr. Right


----------



## High_Gravity

It seems that alot of people especially men want the comfort of being in a relationship like the sex, fun, weekend get aways etc without the commitment and head aches that come with it, what I find strange is a good number of women are willing to accomodate these men but the guys that actually want a relationship go in the dustbin, interesting.


----------



## High_Gravity

Andylusion said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Andylusion said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> I have a feeling it is going the same route as it did then.  Great guy, have a blast together, good chemistry.... but ... he has said that he still doesnt feel he "is in a good place" to put in the time a relationship deserves.  Which is the issue we had before.
> 
> But I enjoy his company and we have fun when we go out so I am good with it for now...
> 
> 
> 
> 
> First, I have no idea about you, or him, or your relationship.
> 
> But I would warn you of one thing.   I've seen this before with other men specifically.   It's a man thing.
> 
> If you, as woman, are available to him, whenever he wants to go out......   You are basically an unpaid adult escort.
> 
> *IF*... I don't know the situation.   Just based on what you said right there... you are a call girl that isn't paid.
> 
> And here's the kicker.   If he knows he can call you up whenever he wants you, and doesn't have to make any commitments, and you'll "go away" until the next time he calls.......
> 
> Please don't be mad, I'm just saying what I've seen....
> 
> .... He will never "feel he is in a good place to put in the time a relationship deserves"...... when doesn't have to.   And right now... he doesn't have to.   He can call his call-girl whenever he wants, and enjoy the company of a women when he wants it, and doesn't have to put any time into a real relationship that requires commitment.
> 
> And here's the other thing.... as long as you are "with" him whenever he calls for a night out... your chances of finding a man that wants something real.... very low.
> 
> Again, don't be mad.  Just saying what I have seen.  Just a messenger.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Well I wouldnt go as far as to call her an escort per say, but yeah if a man gets to have the same kind of fun you get in a relationship like hanging out, sex etc without actually being commited than yes its a big win for the man, and he will not want to commit, why should he? but if shes fine with it, their good to go I guess.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> For men, this is how they see it.   But women, it's different.  A woman may claim that's all she wants... but that's normally not true.
> 
> Many times I've seen it where the woman says she's completely happy with the commitment-less relationship... but then they are miserable.
> 
> There's a girl (I'll call her Tammy since she didn't give me permission to share this), and she had exactly this kind of relationship.  Tammy hung out with this guy for 3 years.   Then, he found someone else.   Which if Tammy really believed that a commitment-less relationship was fine... she would have just accepted that and moved on.   Instead Tammy had a mental break down, and ended up on anti-depressants and 3 years of counseling.
> 
> Another girl (Linda I'll call her), was with another guy for 3 years.  They joked about how they didn't need marriage or commitment.  Linda even joked about marriage.   Then the guy found another girl, and moved out.   Linda became the most angry bitter person you ever met.     She never really was the same after that.
> 
> Guy can deal with this floating relationship a ton easier than woman.  They say they don't need commitment, but most of them really want something solid and secure, and while you think it's a safe perfectly fine open relationship, you are actually really harming these women.  They are not designed for flings and short relationships.
Click to expand...

 
Well I think women are trying to accomodate these guys who want the the relationship fun but not the relationship itself, women tend to think they can "change" men but it never works. Thats heart break waiting to happen, like Diana said if a man says something believe him, he ain't changin.


----------



## Vandalshandle

High_Gravity said:


> Andylusion said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Andylusion said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> I have a feeling it is going the same route as it did then.  Great guy, have a blast together, good chemistry.... but ... he has said that he still doesnt feel he "is in a good place" to put in the time a relationship deserves.  Which is the issue we had before.
> 
> But I enjoy his company and we have fun when we go out so I am good with it for now...
> 
> 
> 
> 
> First, I have no idea about you, or him, or your relationship.
> 
> But I would warn you of one thing.   I've seen this before with other men specifically.   It's a man thing.
> 
> If you, as woman, are available to him, whenever he wants to go out......   You are basically an unpaid adult escort.
> 
> *IF*... I don't know the situation.   Just based on what you said right there... you are a call girl that isn't paid.
> 
> And here's the kicker.   If he knows he can call you up whenever he wants you, and doesn't have to make any commitments, and you'll "go away" until the next time he calls.......
> 
> Please don't be mad, I'm just saying what I've seen....
> 
> .... He will never "feel he is in a good place to put in the time a relationship deserves"...... when doesn't have to.   And right now... he doesn't have to.   He can call his call-girl whenever he wants, and enjoy the company of a women when he wants it, and doesn't have to put any time into a real relationship that requires commitment.
> 
> And here's the other thing.... as long as you are "with" him whenever he calls for a night out... your chances of finding a man that wants something real.... very low.
> 
> Again, don't be mad.  Just saying what I have seen.  Just a messenger.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Well I wouldnt go as far as to call her an escort per say, but yeah if a man gets to have the same kind of fun you get in a relationship like hanging out, sex etc without actually being commited than yes its a big win for the man, and he will not want to commit, why should he? but if shes fine with it, their good to go I guess.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> For men, this is how they see it.   But women, it's different.  A woman may claim that's all she wants... but that's normally not true.
> 
> Many times I've seen it where the woman says she's completely happy with the commitment-less relationship... but then they are miserable.
> 
> There's a girl (I'll call her Tammy since she didn't give me permission to share this), and she had exactly this kind of relationship.  Tammy hung out with this guy for 3 years.   Then, he found someone else.   Which if Tammy really believed that a commitment-less relationship was fine... she would have just accepted that and moved on.   Instead Tammy had a mental break down, and ended up on anti-depressants and 3 years of counseling.
> 
> Another girl (Linda I'll call her), was with another guy for 3 years.  They joked about how they didn't need marriage or commitment.  Linda even joked about marriage.   Then the guy found another girl, and moved out.   Linda became the most angry bitter person you ever met.     She never really was the same after that.
> 
> Guy can deal with this floating relationship a ton easier than woman.  They say they don't need commitment, but most of them really want something solid and secure, and while you think it's a safe perfectly fine open relationship, you are actually really harming these women.  They are not designed for flings and short relationships.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Well I think women are trying to accomodate these guys who want the the relationship fun but not the relationship itself, women tend to think they can "change" men but it never works. Thats heart break waiting to happen, like Diana said if a man says something believe him, he ain't changin.
Click to expand...


Absolutely true. For years, I tried to be the person that the women wanted to change me to. That did not work, so I stopped doing that and made it extremely clear to women that I was not going to change. Take it or leave it. Often, they would agree to that, and then a few years later, decide that i had not become what they wanted, and would break it off. When I would remind them that I had announced back at the very beginning that i was never going to be their grandchild's grandfather, or whatever, they would say, "Yes, and i thought that I could deal with that, but I was wrong". Now, I won't even consider a commitment at all, conditional, or not.


----------



## High_Gravity

I told my ex gf when we first met I was not interested in getting married again, 5 years later we broke up and I asked her why, she said I wanted you to marry me.


----------



## Andylusion

Vandalshandle said:


> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Andylusion said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> High_Gravity said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Andylusion said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Diana1180 said:
> 
> 
> 
> I have a feeling it is going the same route as it did then.  Great guy, have a blast together, good chemistry.... but ... he has said that he still doesnt feel he "is in a good place" to put in the time a relationship deserves.  Which is the issue we had before.
> 
> But I enjoy his company and we have fun when we go out so I am good with it for now...
> 
> 
> 
> 
> First, I have no idea about you, or him, or your relationship.
> 
> But I would warn you of one thing.   I've seen this before with other men specifically.   It's a man thing.
> 
> If you, as woman, are available to him, whenever he wants to go out......   You are basically an unpaid adult escort.
> 
> *IF*... I don't know the situation.   Just based on what you said right there... you are a call girl that isn't paid.
> 
> And here's the kicker.   If he knows he can call you up whenever he wants you, and doesn't have to make any commitments, and you'll "go away" until the next time he calls.......
> 
> Please don't be mad, I'm just saying what I've seen....
> 
> .... He will never "feel he is in a good place to put in the time a relationship deserves"...... when doesn't have to.   And right now... he doesn't have to.   He can call his call-girl whenever he wants, and enjoy the company of a women when he wants it, and doesn't have to put any time into a real relationship that requires commitment.
> 
> And here's the other thing.... as long as you are "with" him whenever he calls for a night out... your chances of finding a man that wants something real.... very low.
> 
> Again, don't be mad.  Just saying what I have seen.  Just a messenger.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Well I wouldnt go as far as to call her an escort per say, but yeah if a man gets to have the same kind of fun you get in a relationship like hanging out, sex etc without actually being commited than yes its a big win for the man, and he will not want to commit, why should he? but if shes fine with it, their good to go I guess.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> For men, this is how they see it.   But women, it's different.  A woman may claim that's all she wants... but that's normally not true.
> 
> Many times I've seen it where the woman says she's completely happy with the commitment-less relationship... but then they are miserable.
> 
> There's a girl (I'll call her Tammy since she didn't give me permission to share this), and she had exactly this kind of relationship.  Tammy hung out with this guy for 3 years.   Then, he found someone else.   Which if Tammy really believed that a commitment-less relationship was fine... she would have just accepted that and moved on.   Instead Tammy had a mental break down, and ended up on anti-depressants and 3 years of counseling.
> 
> Another girl (Linda I'll call her), was with another guy for 3 years.  They joked about how they didn't need marriage or commitment.  Linda even joked about marriage.   Then the guy found another girl, and moved out.   Linda became the most angry bitter person you ever met.     She never really was the same after that.
> 
> Guy can deal with this floating relationship a ton easier than woman.  They say they don't need commitment, but most of them really want something solid and secure, and while you think it's a safe perfectly fine open relationship, you are actually really harming these women.  They are not designed for flings and short relationships.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Well I think women are trying to accomodate these guys who want the the relationship fun but not the relationship itself, women tend to think they can "change" men but it never works. Thats heart break waiting to happen, like Diana said if a man says something believe him, he ain't changin.
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Absolutely true. For years, I tried to be the person that the women wanted to change me to. That did not work, so I stopped doing that and made it extremely clear to women that I was not going to change. Take it or leave it. Often, they would agree to that, and then a few years later, decide that i had not become what they wanted, and would break it off. When I would remind them that I had announced back at the very beginning that i was never going to be their grandchild's grandfather, or whatever, they would say, "Yes, and i thought that I could deal with that, but I was wrong". Now, I won't even consider a commitment at all, conditional, or not.
Click to expand...


That's another issue.  Women tend to think that they can divorce and find another man who will be their babies daddy, or babies grand daddy. 

I have been absolutely stunned at the number of singles ads by women with multiple kids.

What exactly you girls are thinking is beyond me.   This is why you get married, and stay married.  You will never find some guy that wants to be a father to a dozen kids that don't respect him as father, and he isn't a father too.

I think......     total guess here.... but I think it has something to do with all these pathetic cheezy romance novels and movies, where Sleepless in Seattle find the man of her dreams, and the kids all just accept new-mommy and new-daddy.

Crazy.   That old joke "You're not my real daddy!" isn't a joke.  It's real life.   Step-families normally end up on Jerry Springer, or worse Dr Phil.   Just watch those programs, and count the blended families.


----------



## Vandalshandle

My step father walked into a buzz saw, when he married my mother when my two brothers and I were only 7 to 13. Today, looking back, I feel sorry for him.


----------



## Andylusion

Vandalshandle said:


> My step father walked into a buzz saw, when he married my mother when my two brothers and I were only 7 to 13. Today, looking back, I feel sorry for him.



Oh yeah.   My uncle married a chick, and had two kids.  He had a third with the chick.   The third kid turned out perfectly fine.   The other two... total train wreck.   All kinds of problems and issues.   Nightmare.


----------



## Diana1180

I come from a blended family... my father remarried when I was 11.  My mother walked out when my brother and I were very young.  He married a lady with a son and daughter of her own.  It was actually a very successful blending of the families.  We all get along great and are all very close.  I know this is not the norm..but not ALL people who get remarried are doomed for failure.

Now... I was divorced at 23.  Yes, very young and very short marriage.  My daughter was about 2 years old.  when we divorced.  I have purposely not been in a serious relationship since because I didn't want anyone having to think they have to play dad to my child.  Now that she is older (16) it will be easier to date..but I have been out of the game so long.... its frustrating lol.


----------



## Andylusion

Diana1180 said:


> I come from a blended family... my father remarried when I was 11.  My mother walked out when my brother and I were very young.  He married a lady with a son and daughter of her own.  It was actually a very successful blending of the families.  We all get along great and are all very close.  I know this is not the norm..but not ALL people who get remarried are doomed for failure.
> 
> Now... I was divorced at 23.  Yes, very young and very short marriage.  My daughter was about 2 years old.  when we divorced.  I have purposely not been in a serious relationship since because I didn't want anyone having to think they have to play dad to my child.  Now that she is older (16) it will be easier to date..but I have been out of the game so long.... its frustrating lol.



It will be extremely difficult for you now.  Most of the men your age will be the screwed up wrecks hooked on porn, which is why they are still 'available'.   The good guys are already married, or they are looking for chicks a decade younger than you.

Your best bet is to find a guy 10 years senior.   Even then it will be hard.  After all these years, you and the guy will both be fairly set in your ways.   Trying to merge two people after you have all your life patterns set, will be difficult.   That's being nice.

It can be done.  But this is why you get married, and stay married.


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## AquaAthena

I love the complete independence being single gives me. Friends w/benefits, long distance works out very well for my preferred lifestyle.


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