# I Was Abducted By An Alien



## B. Kidd

My right hip still aches at times where they stuck a robotic syringe. 
Traveled there and back through a worm-hole that beat flying Jet Blue.

True story.


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## HUGGY

Maybe you were just date raped at a gay bar!  Ever think of that?  Them ruffies are wicked aphrodisiacs!


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## B. Kidd

I was immersed in an aquarium like tank with opaque green heavy liquid on a semi-vertical table and was totally amazed that I could breathe in that gooey gunk.
I sure hope it wasn't homos'. If they were, my wife would kill me if she found out.


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## boedicca

Did you meet the Brain Bug?


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## eots

B. Kidd said:


> My right hip still aches at times where they stuck a robotic syringe.
> Traveled there and back through a worm-hole that beat flying Jet Blue.
> 
> True story.



Big deal.. everyone and his brother has been abducted and probed by aliens....thats why I sleep with a baby Jesus nite -lite  ..it scares the hell out of the aliens..anyone without one has most likely been abducted at some point.. most just dont rememeber ,it seems most folk need to be hypnotised first to _remember _.


[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TFhijjt9fhU]Bard of Ely's UFO encounter as recalled under hypnosis - YouTube[/ame]


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## B. Kidd

boedicca said:


> Did you meet the Brain Bug?



Nope.
I was in a semi-comatose state, probably in order to survive the speeds involved in worm-hole travel and the ensuing syringe extraction from my hip, even tho' I felt some pain when the needle was inserted, as it was a horse sized needle. Sorta like being on liquid valium at the dentist.
As far as I know, my brain was left intact.
Thank God!


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## B. Kidd

eots said:


> B. Kidd said:
> 
> 
> 
> My right hip still aches at times where they stuck a robotic syringe.
> Traveled there and back through a worm-hole that beat flying Jet Blue.
> 
> True story.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Big deal.. everyone and his brother has been abducted and probed by aliens....thats why I sleep with a baby Jesus nite -lite  ..it scares the hell out of the aliens..anyone without one has most likely been abducted at some point.. most just dont rememeber ,it seems most folk need to be hypnotised first to _remember _.
> 
> 
> [ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TFhijjt9fhU]Bard of Ely's UFO encounter as recalled under hypnosis - YouTube[/ame]
Click to expand...


Nite lights won't help Eots. They scout out their abductions decades before the abduction.


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## eots

OH-OH...

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kyzTm5REaCA]Aliens Exist Demo - Blink 182 Enema Of The State Demo 1998 RARE - YouTube[/ame]


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## boedicca

B. Kidd said:


> boedicca said:
> 
> 
> 
> Did you meet the Brain Bug?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Nope.
> I was in a semi-comatose state, probably in order to survive the speeds involved in worm-hole travel and the ensuing syringe extraction from my hip, even tho' I felt some pain when the needle was inserted, as it was a horse sized needle. Sorta like being on liquid valium at the dentist.
> As far as I know, my brain was left intact.
> Thank God!
Click to expand...



Did a DRD give you an injection of microsbe so you could understand what the Aliens were talking about?


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## B. Kidd

boedicca said:


> B. Kidd said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> boedicca said:
> 
> 
> 
> Did you meet the Brain Bug?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Nope.
> I was in a semi-comatose state, probably in order to survive the speeds involved in worm-hole travel and the ensuing syringe extraction from my hip, even tho' I felt some pain when the needle was inserted, as it was a horse sized needle. Sorta like being on liquid valium at the dentist.
> As far as I know, my brain was left intact.
> Thank God!
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> 
> Did a DRD give you an injection of microsbe so you could understand what the Aliens were talking about?
Click to expand...


Never heard them talking. The green goo I was immersed in, like previously stated was opaque, and soundless, so I never got a good look at the alien(s) conducting the procedure. Tho', I did experience a shadow of movements coming from the other side of the tank I was in and had a sense that there might be more than just one.


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## boedicca

Too bad.  It's really cool when one gets the microbe injection and can communicate with them.


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## B. Kidd

boedicca said:


> Too bad.  It's really cool when one gets the microbe injection and can communicate with them.



I'm just glad that I was returned with a minor hip ache.

It feels good to air this experience out publicly here at USMB without fear of total ridicule.
Oh, I forgot to add.....well, I'll save that for another time.


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## Sunni Man

[ame=http://youtu.be/NJDWd91nlI4]Medicine time - YouTube[/ame]


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## Politico

Admitting you are ill is the first step to getting better.


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## yidnar

B. Kidd said:


> My right hip still aches at times where they stuck a robotic syringe.
> Traveled there and back through a worm-hole that beat flying Jet Blue.
> 
> True story.


 were you gang probed ??


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## editec

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q9eTptxKnVw]The Byrds Mr. Spaceman with Lyrics - YouTube[/ame]


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## Meister

HUGGY said:


> Maybe you were just date raped at a gay bar!  Ever think of that?  Them ruffies are wicked aphrodisiacs!




Maybe you shouldn't have slipped him that ruffie and had your way with him, Huggy.  just sayin....


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## B. Kidd

Hey E-Tec, love the Byrds.
Thanks for the tune.


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## April

I was abducted...and impregnated, at least three times. 
My kids still don't believe me.


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## Ringel05

B. Kidd said:


> boedicca said:
> 
> 
> 
> Did you meet the Brain Bug?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Nope.
> I was in a semi-comatose state, probably in order to survive the speeds involved in worm-hole travel and the ensuing syringe extraction from my hip, even tho' I felt some pain when the needle was inserted, as it was a horse sized needle. Sorta like being on liquid valium at the dentist.
> As far as I know, *my brain was left intact.*
> Thank God!
Click to expand...


Sorry.  I've got some bad news for ya...........


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## Coyote

Ringel05 said:


> B. Kidd said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> boedicca said:
> 
> 
> 
> Did you meet the Brain Bug?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Nope.
> I was in a semi-comatose state, probably in order to survive the speeds involved in worm-hole travel and the ensuing syringe extraction from my hip, even tho' I felt some pain when the needle was inserted, as it was a horse sized needle. Sorta like being on liquid valium at the dentist.
> As far as I know, *my brain was left intact.*
> Thank God!
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Sorry.  I've got some bad news for ya...........
Click to expand...


Found it!


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## Ringel05

AngelsNDemons said:


> I was abducted...and impregnated, at least three times.
> My kids still don't believe me.



Ferengi?


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## Ringel05

Coyote said:


> Ringel05 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> B. Kidd said:
> 
> 
> 
> Nope.
> I was in a semi-comatose state, probably in order to survive the speeds involved in worm-hole travel and the ensuing syringe extraction from my hip, even tho' I felt some pain when the needle was inserted, as it was a horse sized needle. Sorta like being on liquid valium at the dentist.
> As far as I know, *my brain was left intact.*
> Thank God!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Sorry.  I've got some bad news for ya...........
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Found it!
Click to expand...


I love that old picture, working with Dr Frankenstein was pure joy.  He wasn't very good at charades though.


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## April

Ringel05 said:


> AngelsNDemons said:
> 
> 
> 
> I was abducted...and impregnated, at least three times.
> My kids still don't believe me.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Ferengi?
Click to expand...


No, not by the Ferengi...they looked a bit like Manbearpig.


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## Ringel05

AngelsNDemons said:


> Ringel05 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> AngelsNDemons said:
> 
> 
> 
> I was abducted...and impregnated, at least three times.
> My kids still don't believe me.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Ferengi?
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> No, not by the Ferengi...they looked a bit like Manbearpig.
Click to expand...


Ewoks with the mange?


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## April

Ringel05 said:


> AngelsNDemons said:
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> Ringel05 said:
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> Ferengi?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> No, not by the Ferengi...they looked a bit like Manbearpig.
> 
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> 
> 
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Ewoks with the mange?
Click to expand...



 Yeah...and they kept screaming something about global warming.


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## Pop23

B. Kidd said:


> boedicca said:
> 
> 
> 
> Did you meet the Brain Bug?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Nope.
> *I was in a semi-comatose state,* probably in order to survive the speeds involved in worm-hole travel and the ensuing syringe extraction from my hip, even tho' I felt some pain when the needle was inserted, as it was a horse sized needle. Sorta like being on liquid valium at the dentist.
> As far as I know, my brain was left intact.
> Thank God!
Click to expand...


Does that mean my in-laws are aliens, cause that's the state I'm in everytime they spend a weekend?


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## Pop23

AngelsNDemons said:


> I was abducted...and impregnated, at least three times.
> My kids still don't believe me.



By aliens that looked like Al Gore...

Well that is the rumor.


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## April

Pop23 said:


> AngelsNDemons said:
> 
> 
> 
> I was abducted...and impregnated, at least three times.
> My kids still don't believe me.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> By aliens that looked like Al Gore...
> 
> Well that is the rumor.
Click to expand...


As a matter of global security...


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## B. Kidd

Pop23 said:


> AngelsNDemons said:
> 
> 
> 
> I was abducted...and impregnated, at least three times.
> My kids still don't believe me.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> By aliens that looked like Al Gore...
> 
> Well that is the rumor.
Click to expand...


Well, if you think she talks sh*t; then for sure, it was Al Gore.


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## Pop23

Here's my Alian obduction story

It started really nice. Beautiful music, children spreading flowers

I seemed to be in the presence of many of my close friends and family....

It ended by me saying.......

* I DO *

Someone tell me it was just a nightmare!!!

And the probing, all the probing......

Arghhhhhhhhhhhhh

Somebody help me!!!!


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## HUGGY

Meister said:


> HUGGY said:
> 
> 
> 
> Maybe you were just date raped at a gay bar!  Ever think of that?  Them ruffies are wicked aphrodisiacs!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Maybe you shouldn't have slipped him that ruffie and had your way with him, Huggy.  just sayin....
Click to expand...


I have no desire to have any "way" with any dude.


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## laughinReaper

I've had one. 

A large pink fuzzy saucer pulled up to my bedroom window blasting Lil Wayne,the vibration broke my window. A bright light probed my room then I was transported to a mist filled room. A tall lanky alien with tentacles on his head came forward ran his hands down my arms and legs as if looking for something and then made me sit on a soft giant jelly bean and breathe into a tube. They made me drink a strong tasting amber substance that made me dizzy and I fainted. when I came too I was back in my room and the tall lanky alien with tentacles on his head handed me a dried pod of some plant life no doubt native to his planet, made a hand gesture and left in his large pink fuzzy saucer.


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## Gracie

You guys crack me up.


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## boedicca

AngelsNDemons said:


> Ringel05 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> AngelsNDemons said:
> 
> 
> 
> I was abducted...and impregnated, at least three times.
> My kids still don't believe me.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Ferengi?
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> No, not by the Ferengi...they looked a bit like Manbearpig.
Click to expand...




I hear they boink like Wild Sex Poodles!


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## April

boedicca said:


> AngelsNDemons said:
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> Ringel05 said:
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> Ferengi?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> No, not by the Ferengi...they looked a bit like Manbearpig.
> 
> 
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> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I hear they boink like Wild Sex Poodles!
Click to expand...


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## Pop23

AngelsNDemons said:


> boedicca said:
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> 
> 
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> AngelsNDemons said:
> 
> 
> 
> No, not by the Ferengi...they looked a bit like Manbearpig.
> 
> 
> 
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> 
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> 
> 
> 
> I hear they boink like Wild Sex Poodles!
> 
> Click to expand...
Click to expand...


I'm planing on being abducted tonight. Will give more details tomorrow.

Oh the horror, oh the horror.

More wine honey?


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## April

Pop23 said:


> I'm planing on being abducted tonight. Will give more details tomorrow.
> 
> Oh the horror, oh the horror.
> 
> More wine honey?



So? How did it go? Were you probed unrelentingly? Are you pregnant?


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## Pop23

AngelsNDemons said:


> Pop23 said:
> 
> 
> 
> I'm planing on being abducted tonight. Will give more details tomorrow.
> 
> Oh the horror, oh the horror.
> 
> More wine honey?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> So? How did it go? Were you probed unrelentingly? Are you pregnant?
Click to expand...


Still going on, will fill you in when this ends....

Hey, at least they brought beer!!!!!


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## boedicca

Pop23 said:


> AngelsNDemons said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Pop23 said:
> 
> 
> 
> I'm planing on being abducted tonight. Will give more details tomorrow.
> 
> Oh the horror, oh the horror.
> 
> More wine honey?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> So? How did it go? Were you probed unrelentingly? Are you pregnant?
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> Still going on, will fill you in when this ends....
> 
> Hey, at least they brought beer!!!!!
Click to expand...



No dinner first?  What's that about?


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## Pop23

boedicca said:


> Pop23 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> AngelsNDemons said:
> 
> 
> 
> So? How did it go? Were you probed unrelentingly? Are you pregnant?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Still going on, will fill you in when this ends....
> 
> Hey, at least they brought beer!!!!!
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> 
> No dinner first?  What's that about?
Click to expand...


Ok, over for now. They said they were from the Planet Dolly Parton. Can't go into a lot of detail, but damn near suffocated more than a few times.

Come back aliens, come back

Oh and bring more beer!


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## April

They were from Dollywood?


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## Sunshine

B. Kidd said:


> My right hip still aches at times where they stuck a robotic syringe.
> Traveled there and back through a worm-hole that beat flying Jet Blue.
> 
> True story.



That's nothing.  I'm a child of Osiris, and the Annunaki will be by before too long in a chariot of fire to take me back with them to Sirius.  That's not all.  I'm psychic and I read the cards.  The cards tell me you are a nut case.


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## Sunshine

B. Kidd said:


> I was immersed in an aquarium like tank with opaque green heavy liquid on a semi-vertical table and was totally amazed that I could breathe in that gooey gunk.
> I sure hope it wasn't homos'. If they were, my wife would kill me if she found out.



So you came to with gooey blue gunk in your nose.  Stop blowing coke with the homos.  Your wife will like you better.


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## Sunshine

B. Kidd said:


> boedicca said:
> 
> 
> 
> Did you meet the Brain Bug?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Nope.
> I was in a semi-comatose state, probably in order to survive the speeds involved in worm-hole travel and the ensuing syringe extraction from my hip, even tho' I felt some pain when the needle was inserted, as it was a horse sized needle. Sorta like being on liquid valium at the dentist.
> As far as I know, my brain was left intact.
> Thank God!
Click to expand...


Alcohol is liquid valium.  That and the coke should explain the whole incident.  BTW, did you get to shake hands with Elvis?


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## Kooshdakhaa

OMG!  I woke up with a sore hip today!!!  And I thought I just slept wrong.


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## fyrenza

What I don't "get" is :

If they're aliens, with super technology, that can mask their space ships, and be beaming folks all around,

wtf do they need to abduct us?

Why wouldn't they just, oh, say, read all of our medical books about human physiology?

Seems like kidnapping us would be a major pain in the ass ...


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## Pop23

fyrenza said:


> What I don't "get" is :
> 
> If they're aliens, with super technology, that can mask their space ships, and be beaming folks all around,
> 
> wtf do they need to abduct us?
> 
> Why wouldn't they just, oh, say, read all of our medical books about human physiology?
> 
> Seems like kidnapping us would be a major pain in the ass ...



Maybe they have a great sense of humor?

Probing question?


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## boedicca

fyrenza said:


> What I don't "get" is :
> 
> If they're aliens, with super technology, that can mask their space ships, and be beaming folks all around,
> 
> wtf do they need to abduct us?
> 
> Why wouldn't they just, oh, say, read all of our medical books about human physiology?
> 
> Seems like kidnapping us would be a major pain in the ass ...





Why do humans collect insects?


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## boedicca

Pop23 said:


> fyrenza said:
> 
> 
> 
> What I don't "get" is :
> 
> If they're aliens, with super technology, that can mask their space ships, and be beaming folks all around,
> 
> wtf do they need to abduct us?
> 
> Why wouldn't they just, oh, say, read all of our medical books about human physiology?
> 
> Seems like kidnapping us would be a major pain in the ass ...
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Maybe they have a great sense of humor?
> 
> Probing question?
Click to expand...



So Pop:

Do aliens really prefer Reese's Pieces?


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## Sunshine

boedicca said:


> fyrenza said:
> 
> 
> 
> What I don't "get" is :
> 
> If they're aliens, with super technology, that can mask their space ships, and be beaming folks all around,
> 
> wtf do they need to abduct us?
> 
> Why wouldn't they just, oh, say, read all of our medical books about human physiology?
> 
> Seems like kidnapping us would be a major pain in the ass ...
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Why do humans collect insects?
Click to expand...


Because their fifth grade teacher tells them to?


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## Pop23

boedicca said:


> Pop23 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> fyrenza said:
> 
> 
> 
> What I don't "get" is :
> 
> If they're aliens, with super technology, that can mask their space ships, and be beaming folks all around,
> 
> wtf do they need to abduct us?
> 
> Why wouldn't they just, oh, say, read all of our medical books about human physiology?
> 
> Seems like kidnapping us would be a major pain in the ass ...
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Maybe they have a great sense of humor?
> 
> Probing question?
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> 
> 
> So Pop:
> 
> Do aliens really prefer Reese's Pieces?
Click to expand...


Funny you ask

Dissolved in beer!


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## April

Did the aliens forget to remove the probe Poppi?


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## Pop23

Not sure what you're asking......

They left the keg, and that's what's truly important!


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## April

Pop23 said:


> Not sure what you're asking......
> 
> They left the keg, and that's what's truly important!



Just a SP alien butt probe joke...but, I do have to ask...what does space alien beer taste like?


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## Pop23

AngelsNDemons said:


> Pop23 said:
> 
> 
> 
> Not sure what you're asking......
> 
> They left the keg, and that's what's truly important!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Just a SP alien butt probe joke...but, I do have to ask...what does space alien beer taste like?
Click to expand...


Ambrosia

No, no, better than that

Like the nectar of the Gods....

Wait, even better

Like heaven opened a micro brewery.....

Ahhh shoot, who am I kidding.....

Tastes like chicken......


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## Bleipriester

fyrenza said:


> What I don't "get" is :
> 
> If they're aliens, with super technology, that can mask their space ships, and be beaming folks all around,
> 
> wtf do they need to abduct us?
> 
> Why wouldn't they just, oh, say, read all of our medical books about human physiology?
> 
> Seems like kidnapping us would be a major pain in the ass ...


What if their purposes differ from studying our bodies?


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## rightwinger

I was abducted by an alien. He offered to take me to his home planet

I told him I have no desire to see Uranus

He let me go.....true story


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## B. Kidd

rightwinger said:


> I was abducted by an alien. He offered to take me to his home planet
> 
> I told him I have no desire to see Uranus
> 
> He let me go.....true story




Liar, liar, pants on fire!

You've been up, at the least, 75% of the anuses on this board since you've been here......true story.....


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## Roadrunner

B. Kidd said:


> My right hip still aches at times where they stuck a robotic syringe.
> Traveled there and back through a worm-hole that beat flying Jet Blue.
> 
> True story.



Ask my brother, Joe Blam.


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## Mad_Cabbie

[ame=http://youtu.be/6tZar4wRP40]Kids in the hall - Aliens probing - YouTube[/ame]


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## rightwinger

Was it a cute little alien like ET or a slimy bug like Aliens?


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## Delta4Embassy

Don't suppose the OP has any evidence of being abducted? ...Always good to ask.


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## HUGGY

With all that ass probing going on in these alien abduction fanatsies...

I'm thinking that most if not all of at least the males have a homosexual component to their wiring and might consider coming out of the closet.

Just sayin...


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## B. Kidd

Delta4Embassy said:


> Don't suppose the OP has any evidence of being abducted? ...Always good to ask.



Nothing convincing. Only a periodic self-evident ache in my right hip for the last thirty years where they stuck the syringe and a vivid memory of the experience as if it had just happened yesterday.


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## Delta4Embassy

HUGGY said:


> With all that ass probing going on in these alien abduction fanatsies...
> 
> I'm thinking that most if not all of at least the males have a homosexual component to their wiring and might consider coming out of the closet.
> 
> Just sayin...



Am willing to bet in the case of homophobic men, some of the alien-abduction people actually had a gay experience but repressed it so strongly than they concocted the more acceptable 'alien' scenario. Has happened with child sexual abuse patients. Young boy is raped by an adult man at a very young age, and replaced that memory with an alien abduction false-memory.


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## B. Kidd

Putin was not abducted..........please resume your normal activities.


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## Delta4Embassy

Was a funny scene in think the frist season of Babylon 5 where a human descendent of someone who was abduted by aliens is sueing a 'Gray' claiming the Gray's descended from the Gray who kidnapped the human's ancestor.


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## ChrisL

B. Kidd said:


> My right hip still aches at times where they stuck a robotic syringe.
> Traveled there and back through a worm-hole that beat flying Jet Blue.
> 
> True story.



Did you get probed too?


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## Vigilante




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## ChrisL

Vigilante said:


>



Lol!  Oh the drama!  How silly!  Good Lord!  I do not believe it.  A UFO researcher who specializes in UFO abductees.


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## Delta4Embassy

Used to be gnomes and fairies abducted people. Now it's aliens. Ugh.


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## B. Kidd

I still have PTSD from this experience. No thanks to Pogo, he made me remember this in another thread today.


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## rightwinger

I was abducted by an alien....

He took me up in his spaceship and told me..........I always wanted to see Uranus


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## Dogmaphobe

rightwinger said:


> I was abducted by an alien....
> 
> He took me up in his spaceship and told me..........I always wanted to see Uranus




And here we thought Saturn was the one with the rings around it.


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## B. Kidd

rightwinger said:


> I was abducted by an alien....
> 
> He took me up in his spaceship and told me..........I always wanted to see Uranus



Probings take a lifetime to get over............just ask the DNC and Hillary!.........(Podesta, too!)........


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## CrusaderFrank

When I was 13 I stayed at my cousin's house in CA for the month of August. My cousin Renato and I shared a bedroom. One night I woke up everyone in the house as I ran screaming out of the bedroom at 3AM. They asked what was wrong and I explained to them that there was a large almond-eyed bug in my bed and it was staring at me. My cousin's sister thought I was ridiculous and said it was probably an elephant. Everyone went back to sleep

Many years later I recollected a portion of the event: 3 of them were working on Renato while at least one was watching over me. I turned to look up and saw the black almond eyes.


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## RWS

I wasn't exactly abducted, but here's my story....

Two space aliens, a male and a female, landed their ship in the middle of my farm, and my ex-wife and I ran out and greeted it. We talked to them and then decided to put them up in our house for a few weeks. They exchanged stories with us about culture and technology. On the last night before the aliens departed, we decided to swap spouses just to see what the sex is like. We're swingers.

But here's what happened:

My wife goes to bed with the male alien, looks down at his junk and couldn't hide her disappointment. "That's it?"

"Ah, one second," said the alien and he pulled one of his ears. His penis lengthened several times in size.

"Okay but now it's just weirdly long and skinny..."

"Ah, one second," said the alien and pulled his other ear. His penis swelled with girth.

The next morning, we watched the spaceship fly away. My wife was radiant, she said "What a night, what a night! I'll never forget it. How about you?"

I grumbled, "What about me? That bitch spent the whole night twisting my ears."


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## there4eyeM

America has been, too.


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