# Computer geek humor



## Ringel05




----------



## Ringel05




----------



## Pogo




----------



## Ringel05




----------



## Ringel05




----------



## miketx

A manager, an engineer, and a software developer are returning from a convention. As they are driving down the peak of a mountain the brakes fail and the car goes careening down the road, bouncing off several guard rails before stopping at the bottom.

All three get out of the car, amazingly unhurt. The manager says "I think we should hold a meeting to discuss the possible solutions to our problem."

The engineer says, "I think we should disassemble the car and do a structural analysis on each part to determine the cause."

The software developer says, "Let's push it up to the top and try it again, and see if it happens again."


----------



## Bleipriester




----------



## Ringel05

To err is human, to really foul things up requires a root password.


----------



## iamwhatiseem

years ago when I was in tech support, we bought a couple of these helmets...great fun..someone would call with a computer problem and we would walk up with one of these on...siren too.


----------



## Ringel05




----------



## Ringel05




----------



## Moonglow

Computers are like Gods, lots of rules, and no mercy..


----------



## xyz




----------



## iamwhatiseem

True story...this was way back..prolly 1997 or so... we set up this guys computer so all of his desktop icons opened something other than what they are supposed to. For instance when he clicked on Word it would open Excel, and vice-versa...when he clicked on IE it opened his recycle bin etc. Now obviously we had to see it when it happened...so we setup a camera, which was not easy in those days because there was no wireless cameras...and no sound either.
Anyway...his gestures and gyrations and pounding the desk...throwing up his hands...it was hilarious. Especially because he worked at night and had no one to help him.


----------



## Bleipriester

Cyberfox developer:
"A programmer is just a tool that converts coffee into code."


----------



## Ringel05




----------



## Ringel05




----------



## Bleipriester

Ringel05 said:


>


Only in worst case scenarios. Ctrl + Shift + Esc is the first choice.


----------



## Ringel05




----------



## Ringel05




----------



## namvet

if all else fails


----------



## Abishai100

_*Office Supplies*_


I'd like to do an analysis in the changes in office supplies (e.g., Glu-Stic), since the advent of the Internet has changed how people send mail or documents.

I was intrigued by the rendition of Electro (Marvel Comics) in the recent film _The Amazing Spider-Man 2_.  Hollywood is interested in comp-sci-fi/sci-fi storytelling.  Anyone see the episode of _Spider-Man and His Amazing Friends_ with Electro generating the computer-virus creature Video-Man?


----------



## Ringel05




----------



## Bleipriester




----------



## Ringel05




----------



## banglangtim20

Thank you for taking your time to publish this


----------



## Windparadox

`
`


----------



## iamwhatiseem




----------



## Bob Blaylock

There are 10 kinds of people in the world—those who understand binary numbers, and those who do not.


----------



## Bob Blaylock

Three representatives of a computer company were riding in a taxi, when the taxi got a flat tire.

  The driver asked his passengers to see if they could do anything to help.

  First was a sales representative.  He got out, examined the tire, then told the driver, _“Your car's broken.  You need to buy a new one.”_

  Next, the programmer got out and check the tire.  _“That's a hardware problem,”_ he said.  _“I can't help you with that.”_

  After that, the third passenger, a repair technician, got out to see what he could do.  He opened the trunk, too out the spare tire, and the jack, and swapped out the tires, one by one, until he found the bad one.

[To get this one, you probably have to be old enough to remember when computers used discrete RAM chips, rather than SIMMs, DIMMs, and similar units, when RAM was less reliable than it now is, and when swapping out individual chips with a presumed good one was the common way to fix a computer with a RAM issue.]


----------



## Bleipriester

Linux user watching the neighbor´s usable computer with two jaundiced eyes.


----------



## iamwhatiseem

Bleipriester said:


> Linux user watching the neighbor´s usable computer with two jaundiced eyes.


----------



## Bleipriester

lame...


----------



## Ringel05

Bleipriester said:


> lame...


Yes, your's was.........


----------



## Ringel05




----------



## Bleipriester

Ringel05 said:


> Bleipriester said:
> 
> 
> 
> lame...
> 
> 
> 
> Yes, your's was.........
Click to expand...

Be honest and rate it funny.


----------



## Ringel05

Bleipriester said:


> Ringel05 said:
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Bleipriester said:
> 
> 
> 
> lame...
> 
> 
> 
> Yes, your's was.........
> 
> Click to expand...
> 
> Be honest and rate it funny.
Click to expand...

Still crazy after all these years.  Woooh, still crazy after all these years.......


----------



## Ringel05




----------



## Ringel05




----------



## Ringel05




----------



## Ringel05

I found Cortana's source code..........


----------



## Mr Natural

What’s the difference between a computer salesman and a used car salesmen?







The used car salesman knows when he’s lying to you.


----------



## Bleipriester

Some macabre "humor":






PayPal: Your death has breached our rules


----------



## Marion Morrison




----------



## Marion Morrison




----------



## Marion Morrison




----------



## Marion Morrison




----------



## Marion Morrison




----------



## Marion Morrison




----------



## Marion Morrison




----------



## Marion Morrison




----------



## Marion Morrison




----------



## Marion Morrison




----------



## Ringel05




----------



## Ringel05




----------



## Ringel05




----------



## Marion Morrison




----------



## Ringel05




----------



## Bleipriester




----------



## iamwhatiseem




----------



## my2¢

The company I worked for had a service contract with (I think it was) Bell Atlantic in the 90's.  Well one day the printer everybody was tied to through the LAN wasn't working.  So I called up Bell Atlantic and the guy went on-and-on explaining that it rained last night (an uncommon occurrence here in the desert) and so it was likely that moisture got in such-and-such a place causing a connection problem. I interrupted him to ask what can I do to fix it?  He briefly mentioned coming out in a few days and replacing the part, but his instruction on how to fix it myself was priceless. "Pick the printer up an half inch or so and drop it."  I asked if he was serious and he replied he had folks throughout Phoenix picking up and dropping their printers.

When it rains here folks react as I recall they did back east on the first day of snow.  My new technical skill just added to the excitement of rain over those next few years before that printer was replaced.


----------

