# Stop staring at our tits!



## Bootneck (Jul 18, 2009)

Well, ladies. The tide has turned! Women are now shamelessly ogling the man-breasts of the over forty male. Walk down any street and you can now witness men being subjected to wolf-whistles and lewd comments from passing women with bulging eyes making it crystal clear what is going through their minds.

Its as if they think Im a sex object put on earth solely for their gratification, spat 48-year-old Jim Watson today, founder of the action group Mitts Off Our Bodies (MOOBs). I know women like a man with curves, a receding hairline and a progressively more illiberal world view, but please, show a little respect for yourselves! Im not just a lump of meat, you know. Theres so much more to me than meets the eye. Im a human being with feelings and needs and a waning libido.

Jim is just one of many men complaining that his morning walk to the pub for opening time is being ruined by women office workers taking carefully co-ordinated Diet Coke breaks and lining the pavements to feast on some eye candy. Crowds of women have also been spotted loitering at bus stops to get an eyeful of mens jiggling assets as they run for the bus, while some will cynically drop their handkerchief so that when a man bends to pick it up they can peer down his top or sneak a peak at some hairy arse-cleavage.

Shit! I'm missing out on all this female attention. I wonder how much some implants would cost.


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## Terry (Jul 18, 2009)

Does this mean soon men will be getting breast augmentation? LOL


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## alan1 (Jul 18, 2009)

You've done better.


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## alan1 (Jul 18, 2009)

Terry said:


> Does this mean soon men will be getting breast augmentation? LOL



Oh please, as if we don't play with ourselves enough already?


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## Zoom-boing (Jul 18, 2009)

Boot, you make me laugh.  MOOBS.


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## alan1 (Jul 18, 2009)

Zoom-boing said:


> Boot, you make me laugh.  MOOBS.



It's a common contraction for 'Man Boobs"


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## Bootneck (Jul 18, 2009)

MountainMan said:


> Terry said:
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> 
> > Does this mean soon men will be getting breast augmentation? LOL
> ...



Hey! If you've got 'em, they're for sharing. You're supposed to let the ladies play with them!


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## Phoenix (Jul 18, 2009)

Bootneck said:


> Well, ladies. The tide has turned! Women are now shamelessly ogling the man-breasts of the over forty male. Walk down any street and you can now witness men being subjected to wolf-whistles and lewd comments from passing women with bulging eyes making it crystal clear what is going through their minds.
> 
> Its as if they think Im a sex object put on earth solely for their gratification, spat 48-year-old Jim Watson today, founder of the action group Mitts Off Our Bodies (MOOBs). I know women like a man with curves, a receding hairline and a progressively more illiberal world view, but please, show a little respect for yourselves! Im not just a lump of meat, you know. Theres so much more to me than meets the eye. Im a human being with feelings and needs and a waning libido.
> 
> ...



Does this mean we can ask you guys to post 'em so we can evaluate?


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## Phoenix (Jul 18, 2009)

MountainMan said:


> Oh please, as if we don't play with ourselves enough already?



It's a wonder y'all ever leave the house.


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## Bootneck (Jul 18, 2009)

Eve said:


> Bootneck said:
> 
> 
> > Well, ladies. The tide has turned! Women are now shamelessly ogling the man-breasts of the over forty male. Walk down any street and you can now witness men being subjected to wolf-whistles and lewd comments from passing women with bulging eyes making it crystal clear what is going through their minds.
> ...



I'd be too embarrassed. I'm flat chested.


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## Phoenix (Jul 18, 2009)

Bootneck said:


> I'd be too embarrassed. I'm flat chested.



S'ok, Bootneck.  We don't want you just for your moobs.  

You've got a great personality.


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## alan1 (Jul 18, 2009)

Bootneck said:


> MountainMan said:
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> > Terry said:
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That's what I keep telling the ladies, and they aren't buying it.


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## alan1 (Jul 18, 2009)

Eve said:


> Bootneck said:
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> > I'd be too embarrassed. I'm flat chested.
> ...



Isn't that code for ugly?


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## alan1 (Jul 18, 2009)

Bootneck said:


> Eve said:
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> > Bootneck said:
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Do more push-ups.


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## Phoenix (Jul 18, 2009)

MountainMan said:


> Isn't that code for ugly?



It is?  

Then why did you tell me I had a  great personality?


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## xotoxi (Jul 18, 2009)

MountainMan said:


> Terry said:
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> 
> > Does this mean soon men will be getting breast augmentation? LOL
> ...


 
If you were to get a breast augmentation, what about them would make you play with them?

The hairy nipples?

Oh yeah, BABY!!!


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## Bootneck (Jul 18, 2009)

MountainMan said:


> Bootneck said:
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> > Eve said:
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Nah. Pushups is why I'm flat chested. Floor contact with chest 200 times a day has that effect.


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## Bootneck (Jul 18, 2009)

xotoxi said:


> MountainMan said:
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> > Terry said:
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He's got hairy balls and plays with them. What's the difference?


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## alan1 (Jul 18, 2009)

Bootneck said:


> xotoxi said:
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Ahh, c'mon, you said you wouldn't tell.


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## Bootneck (Jul 18, 2009)

MountainMan said:


> Bootneck said:
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> > xotoxi said:
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I'm sure they all knew. You can't walk round with a testicle hanging out of each leg of your shorts and not expect people to notice.


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## xotoxi (Jul 18, 2009)

Bootneck said:


> MountainMan said:
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> > Bootneck said:
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I thought you were supposed to prevent the chest from touching the floor when doing a pushup.


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## Bootneck (Jul 18, 2009)

xotoxi said:


> Bootneck said:
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I'm masochistic.


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## Phoenix (Jul 18, 2009)

Bootneck said:


> I'm sure they all knew. You can't walk round with a testicle hanging out of each leg of your shorts and not expect people to notice.


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## alan1 (Jul 18, 2009)

Bootneck said:


> MountainMan said:
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> > Bootneck said:
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I don't wear shorts.
Oh crap, that means the testicles dangle lower than I thought.


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## Zoom-boing (Jul 18, 2009)

MountainMan said:


> Zoom-boing said:
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> > Boot, you make me laugh.  MOOBS.
> ...



I know, it makes me lol.  It's so  . . . .  Seinfeld-ish.


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## Phoenix (Jul 18, 2009)

MountainMan said:


> I don't wear shorts.
> Oh crap, that means the testicles dangle lower than I thought.



Watch out for the cat.


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## alan1 (Jul 18, 2009)

Eve said:


> MountainMan said:
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> > I don't wear shorts.
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They ain't mice.


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## Phoenix (Jul 18, 2009)

MountainMan said:


> They ain't mice.



The cat doesn't know that.


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## alan1 (Jul 18, 2009)

Eve said:


> MountainMan said:
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> > They ain't mice.
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So now, you suddenly have the mind of a cat?


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## Bootneck (Jul 18, 2009)

MountainMan said:


> Bootneck said:
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When walking, do you drag 'em or kick 'em?


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## Oddball (Jul 18, 2009)

If you look really carefully, after a few seconds you'll be able to see an ice cream sundae in this photo.


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## Phoenix (Jul 18, 2009)

Dude said:


> If you look really carefully, after a few seconds you'll be able to see an ice cream sundae in this photo.



Huh.

Was there something else in the photo?


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## Phoenix (Jul 18, 2009)

MountainMan said:


> So now, you suddenly have the mind of a cat?



I know lots of stuff that might surprise you.


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## Bootneck (Jul 18, 2009)

Dude said:


> If you look really carefully, after a few seconds you'll be able to see an ice cream sundae in this photo.



Now come on Dude! You only cropped the shot at the neck so you wouldn't be recognised. Nice moobs by the way.


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## alan1 (Jul 18, 2009)

Dude said:


> If you look really carefully, after a few seconds you'll be able to see an ice cream sundae in this photo.



Liar.


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## Phoenix (Jul 18, 2009)

MountainMan said:


> Liar.



Pitiful.  

Gimme the sundae then.  You can have the rest.


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## Oddball (Jul 18, 2009)

I have no idea how this works, but Toronto's CN Tower is hidden somewhere in this picture. After looking at it carefully you may discover it, but this could take several tries.


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## Phoenix (Jul 18, 2009)

Arnold used to have some nice ones.  Bet his are still pretty good for a guy his age.


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## Phoenix (Jul 18, 2009)

Bootneck said:


> [
> 
> Nah. Pushups is why I'm flat chested. Floor contact with chest 200 times a day has that effect.



Bootneck?


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## Big Black Dog (Jul 18, 2009)

> Walk down any street and you can now witness men being subjected to wolf-whistles and lewd comments from passing women with bulging eyes making it crystal clear what is going through their minds.



I've had this same problem all of my life it seems.  I just ignore it and keep walking!


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## Phoenix (Jul 18, 2009)

Big Black Dog said:


> > Walk down any street and you can now witness men being subjected to wolf-whistles and lewd comments from passing women with bulging eyes making it crystal clear what is going through their minds.
> 
> 
> 
> I've had this same problem all of my life it seems.  I just ignore it and keep walking!



You're a prince among men, to be sure, BBD.


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## Bootneck (Jul 18, 2009)

Big Black Dog said:


> > Walk down any street and you can now witness men being subjected to wolf-whistles and lewd comments from passing women with bulging eyes making it crystal clear what is going through their minds.
> 
> 
> 
> I've had this same problem all of my life it seems.  I just ignore it and keep walking!



Hairy crack or moobs?


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## Phoenix (Jul 18, 2009)

Bootneck said:


> Hairy crack or moobs?



Holy geez!  He's got _both_?


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## Bootneck (Jul 18, 2009)

Eve said:


> Bootneck said:
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> > Hairy crack or moobs?
> ...



Bloody unfair! No wonder he's getting all those wolf whistles!


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## Phoenix (Jul 18, 2009)

Bootneck said:


> Bloody unfair! No wonder he's getting all those wolf whistles!



No kidding! 


I wonder if he has texting on his phone ...


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## Big Black Dog (Jul 18, 2009)

> You're a prince among men, to be sure, BBD.



Kiss me so I can turn back into a frog.


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## Phoenix (Jul 18, 2009)

Big Black Dog said:


> Kiss me so I can turn back into a frog.




Is Mrs. BBD around?


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## Big Black Dog (Jul 18, 2009)

> Is Mrs. BBD around?



She's in her chair taking a nap.  She wouldn't care if I was slimy and green if it got rid of the hairy crack and MBOOBS.  She'd think it was a fair trade off...


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## Phoenix (Jul 18, 2009)

Big Black Dog said:


> She's in her chair taking a nap.  She wouldn't care if I was slimy and green if it got rid of the hairy crack and MBOOBS.  She'd think it was a fair trade off...



Well, frogs are pretty cute.  Plus, you can just put them in a terrarium and feed 'em flies.


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## Barb (Jul 18, 2009)

Eve said:


> Arnold used to have some nice ones.  Bet his are still pretty good for a guy his age.








http://anythinghollywood.com/?attachment_id=14620http://anythinghollywood.com/?attachment_id=14620


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## KittenKoder (Jul 19, 2009)

Bootneck said:


> Well, ladies. The tide has turned! Women are now shamelessly ogling the man-breasts of the over forty male. Walk down any street and you can now witness men being subjected to wolf-whistles and lewd comments from passing women with bulging eyes making it crystal clear what is going through their minds.
> 
> ...



Men with tits ...


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## Bootneck (Jul 19, 2009)

KittenKoder said:


> Bootneck said:
> 
> 
> > Well, ladies. The tide has turned! Women are now shamelessly ogling the man-breasts of the over forty male. Walk down any street and you can now witness men being subjected to wolf-whistles and lewd comments from passing women with bulging eyes making it crystal clear what is going through their minds.
> ...



Enjoy...


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## editec (Jul 19, 2009)

Women are such animals.

All they think about is sex.

Of course, to cover up (even to themselves) what slaves they are, they call their obsession as "relationships" but they're not fooling Mr. Editec.

They just want you for your precious body fluids, boys.

And, if you're foolish enough to let them have it before they buy you that Corvette, you'll be driving that Pinto for the rest of your life, too.


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## Bootneck (Aug 1, 2009)

What the fuck is going on? First the over forties get women ogling their tits, now they tell us we can't pack the groceries properly!

After years of public denial, a male supermarket shopper has finally broken down and asked for help with his packing.

Before customer services could be drafted in, CCTV footage shows Kevin Bishop committing several rudimentary packing errors, including placing unchecked eggs in his bag before crushing them beneath a Green Giant multipack. He is said to be recovering well at home, but has faced criticism from male pressure groups.

Hes let us all down, said a spokesman for Men Avoid Common Help, Okay (MACHO).  Everyone knows that real men cant pack, but we keep it inside.  Our plums may be pulp, but at least we have our pride.

But Mr Bishop is now a broken man.  I cant ever go back there, he sobbed as he reached for a misshapen tissue box.  But if I want to use the local Asda, Im going to have to ask my wife for directions. 

Jeez! This bloke is a complete arsehole. Everyone knows you don't pack eggs like that. You put them on top of the Green Giant multipack, but under the beer can sixpack. That way they're well protected. Fucking moron!


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