emilynghiem
Constitutionalist / Universalist
10 Things I Learned About Life When My Twins Died
This is a pretty good list of wisdom to share with others
about grief and dealing with setbacks.
Inherently the attitude of forgiveness is in all these statements.
Especially the last point. There are plenty of cases of people saying
hurtful things, so the perception of kindness being innate in people
is in the perception of the beholder. She'd have to be forgiving
to see that people are more kind than cruel, while people who
can't forgive cruel things people say see people as more stupid and selfish than kind.
I can't help but see that some of the author's own
kindness and forgiveness is why people didn't say cruel things to her.
the fact she can write out these ideas within 3 months of going through this
grief shows she was already in a forgiving mindset or had a propensity towards this
people who go into this without that kind of mindset to begin with
can suffer terribly trying to let go of resentment and hurt to get to the same place
==============
It’s hard to believe that it’s almost three months since my twins died. I miss them desperately at times. I miss being their safe haven for growth. I miss feeling them move. I miss singing to them every morning. I miss being excited to meet them in X-amount of time. The loss was sudden and completely unexpected.
When my water broke at 17 weeks, everyone was shocked. My pregnancy had been picture perfect. And when my twins died hours later, I was devastated.
When you experience a tragedy like this, it’s hard not to question everything. It’s hard not to remain in a darkness that pulls you toward feelings of bitterness, anger, helplessness, and self-loathing. It’s hard to see the good in anything.
But you must.
This post was an exercise for me to focus on something other than the utter horror behind losing my twins. What I found was that I have learned some pretty positive life lessons since my twins died.
10 Things I Learned About Life When My Twins Died
This is a pretty good list of wisdom to share with others
about grief and dealing with setbacks.
Inherently the attitude of forgiveness is in all these statements.
Especially the last point. There are plenty of cases of people saying
hurtful things, so the perception of kindness being innate in people
is in the perception of the beholder. She'd have to be forgiving
to see that people are more kind than cruel, while people who
can't forgive cruel things people say see people as more stupid and selfish than kind.
I can't help but see that some of the author's own
kindness and forgiveness is why people didn't say cruel things to her.
the fact she can write out these ideas within 3 months of going through this
grief shows she was already in a forgiving mindset or had a propensity towards this
people who go into this without that kind of mindset to begin with
can suffer terribly trying to let go of resentment and hurt to get to the same place
==============
It’s hard to believe that it’s almost three months since my twins died. I miss them desperately at times. I miss being their safe haven for growth. I miss feeling them move. I miss singing to them every morning. I miss being excited to meet them in X-amount of time. The loss was sudden and completely unexpected.
When my water broke at 17 weeks, everyone was shocked. My pregnancy had been picture perfect. And when my twins died hours later, I was devastated.
When you experience a tragedy like this, it’s hard not to question everything. It’s hard not to remain in a darkness that pulls you toward feelings of bitterness, anger, helplessness, and self-loathing. It’s hard to see the good in anything.
But you must.
This post was an exercise for me to focus on something other than the utter horror behind losing my twins. What I found was that I have learned some pretty positive life lessons since my twins died.
10 Things I Learned About Life When My Twins Died
