Captain Planet: Texas Diplomacy

Abishai100

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Sep 22, 2013
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This is an eco-apocalypto tale inspired by the film The Toxic Avenger and the upcoming DiCaprio-project about the eco-conscious comics/cartoon superhero Captain Planet.

Signing off,



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Samuels noticed that his small Texas town was being overrun by an overwhelming swarm of unusually large grasshoppers one summer. Samuels wondered why these bug suddenly appeared in Texas, USA that summer and if they were an omen of things to come. Samuels had seen the eco-consciousness Al Gore politics-endorsed global-warming documentary An Inconvenient Truth and started thinking about how man's own ambitions might create carrying-capacity problems for the environment, perhaps leading to spiritual maladies! Samuels wondered if that was the real message of these large Texas grasshoppers.

Samuels went to a priest and told him this theory about 'divine retribution' regarding eco-pollution, and the priest told him about how the Bible describes the Earth taking 'vengeance' upon the wastefulness of civilization with vanity-destroying 'locusts.' Samuels then reasoned confidently that the large grasshoppers were indeed locusts forecasting something even worse to come --- phantoms! Samuels considered how industrialization-related ambitions in America catalyzed weighty spiritual sentiments about the 'mindless activity' of a bureaucracy-obsessed modern civilization. Samuels concluded that humans had become morally apathetic 'phantoms.'

Samuels wrote in his notebook that the effects of these activities would yield potent and unnerving 'metaphysical hallucinations.' People would walk around major cities such as Dallas and notice their fellow human beings and see the 'faces' of ghosts (or phantoms!) signifying a new age species anxiety regarding moral waywardness. As Samuels walked down a street in Dallas one morning on his way to the library to do some research about Orwellian political theories regarding industrialization waste, he looked at the multitude of cars and people on the street and started seeing phantoms! He reasoned these phantoms were indeed 'metaphysical hallucinations' (or perhaps premonitions!) of the Biblical Apocalypse.

Samuels decided to collect some of the large grasshoppers one hot August afternoon and look at them under his microscope. He noticed the bugs had very large legs and strangely-shaped heads, and their skin-cells looked very very misshapen! Samuels realized these grasshoppers were the locusts the Bible talked about, and he considered the possibility that the 'phantoms' of moral apathy on the faces of human beings he 'hallucinated' that day in Dallas (on his way to the library) were in some way very 'real' spectres/ghosts. Samuels decided to start writing comic book short-stories about the eco-active fictional superhero Captain Planet. When American movie-star Leo DiCaprio began producing his own film about Captain Planet, Samuels wondered if DiCaprio just might be some kind of 'dormant angel.'


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