Favorite lines from Seinfeld

[Anguille]

"It's come to my attention you had sex with the cleanng lady on your desk."

"Was that wrong?"

That was a funny one. Maybe cause it's getting late here, Seinfeld is seeming a little funnier than at the beginning of the thread.


Ravi, too.

 

[Gunny]

Which part of my statement gives you pause? The last part?

I know. I should be on the stage right?

The one that just left town.

Well, if your comedy routine doesn't pan out, you can always go into mind reading.

 

[Xenophon]

"But he only converted to judasim for the jokes!"

"And this offends you as a jew?"

"No, it offends me as a commedian!"

 

[Ravi]

Hey Ravs, I've been meaning to ask you is "Tissue?" a Seinfeld thing?

I dunno. Ask Del.

From my all time favorite episode, this might help you dear...

Jerry: To a woman, sex is like the garbage man. You just take for granted the fact that any time you put some trash out on the street, a guy in a jumpsuit's gonna come along and pick it up. But now, it's like a garbage strike. The bags are piling up in your head. The sidewalk is blocked. Nothing's getting through. You're stupid.
Elaine: I don't understand.
Jerry: Exactly.

 

[jillian]

Who's going to turn down a junior mint? It's chocolate, it's pepermint, it's delicious. It's very refreshing

 

[Xenophon]

Kavorka!

 

[manifold]

Settle down Beavis!

Here's a perfect example of something I used to think was an original mani expression. Till pop culture caught up with me.

Don't take it personal.

I've told you dozens of times that nothing I ever post is original. Perhaps someday you'll realize I'm not lying about that.

 

[manifold]

Hardly.

Settle down Beavis! Ignorance isn't the same thing as stupidity. If you've never watched something, any opinion you might have about it is largely uninformed...ie, ignorant.

Perhaps YOU need to settle down? The title of the thread is "Favorite Lines from Seinfeld", correct?

I never said I hadn't seen Seinfeld. I said I don't watch sitcoms. Matter of fact, he was a lousy standup comedian prior to sucking enough crank to land a half-hour slot on the tube and IMO he wasn't funny.

Methinks you need to revise your ignorant, and assumptive theory a tad.

Newsflash: Seinfeld IS a sitcom. Perhaps you should be more clear about what you mean.

 

[Anguille]

I've told you dozens of times that nothing I ever post is original. Perhaps someday you'll realize I'm not lying about that.

I can dream, can't I?

 

[manifold]

I've told you dozens of times that nothing I ever post is original. Perhaps someday you'll realize I'm not lying about that.

I can dream, can't I?

tfj


And even that I stole from some douchebag at Fox News.

 

[Gunny]

Settle down Beavis! Ignorance isn't the same thing as stupidity. If you've never watched something, any opinion you might have about it is largely uninformed...ie, ignorant.

Perhaps YOU need to settle down? The title of the thread is "Favorite Lines from Seinfeld", correct?

I never said I hadn't seen Seinfeld. I said I don't watch sitcoms. Matter of fact, he was a lousy standup comedian prior to sucking enough crank to land a half-hour slot on the tube and IMO he wasn't funny.

Methinks you need to revise your ignorant, and assumptive theory a tad.

Newsflash: Seinfeld IS a sitcom. Perhaps you should be more clear about what you mean.

Newsflash: Seinfeld is a comedian -- a person. Perhaps YOU should have been more clear about what YOU mean.

 

[Anguille]

tfj


And even that I stole from some douchebag at Fox News.

WildOn is on Fox now?

 

[manifold]

Perhaps YOU need to settle down? The title of the thread is "Favorite Lines from Seinfeld", correct?

I never said I hadn't seen Seinfeld. I said I don't watch sitcoms. Matter of fact, he was a lousy standup comedian prior to sucking enough crank to land a half-hour slot on the tube and IMO he wasn't funny.

Methinks you need to revise your ignorant, and assumptive theory a tad.

Newsflash: Seinfeld IS a sitcom. Perhaps you should be more clear about what you mean.

Newsflash: Seinfeld is a comedian -- a person. Perhaps YOU should have been more clear about what YOU mean.

You really should leave the playing stupid thing to Ravi.

 

[Ravi]

Newsflash: Seinfeld IS a sitcom. Perhaps you should be more clear about what you mean.

Newsflash: Seinfeld is a comedian -- a person. Perhaps YOU should have been more clear about what YOU mean.

You really should leave the playing stupid thing to Ravi.

I resent that. I don't play stupid.

 

[Ravi]

Perhaps YOU need to settle down? The title of the thread is "Favorite Lines from Seinfeld", correct?

I never said I hadn't seen Seinfeld. I said I don't watch sitcoms. Matter of fact, he was a lousy standup comedian prior to sucking enough crank to land a half-hour slot on the tube and IMO he wasn't funny.

Methinks you need to revise your ignorant, and assumptive theory a tad.

Newsflash: Seinfeld IS a sitcom. Perhaps you should be more clear about what you mean.

Newsflash: Seinfeld is a comedian -- a person. Perhaps YOU should have been more clear about what YOU mean.

LOL! Read the OP...even RGS would have understood it.

 

[manifold]

Jimmy's got his eye on you.

 

[random3434]

Who is Dancing?

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5xi4O1yi6b0]YouTube - Elaine´s Dance[/ame]

 

[Agnapostate]

Frank Costanza: Many Christmases ago, I went to buy a doll for my son. I reached for the last one they had, but so did another man. As I rained blows upon him, I realized there had to be another way.

Cosmo Kramer: What happened to the doll?

Frank Costanza: It was destroyed. But out of that a new holiday was born: a Festivus for the rest of us!

Of course. The line that got me facing the interrogation squad for posting it.

I'll have to devote further thought to the lines, but my favorite sequences include Kramer's brief stint as a pimp lookalike.

 

[Gunny]

Newsflash: Seinfeld IS a sitcom. Perhaps you should be more clear about what you mean.

Newsflash: Seinfeld is a comedian -- a person. Perhaps YOU should have been more clear about what YOU mean.

You really should leave the playing stupid thing to Ravi.

I wasn't playing at anything. You were BEING stupid.

 

[Gunny]

Newsflash: Seinfeld IS a sitcom. Perhaps you should be more clear about what you mean.

Newsflash: Seinfeld is a comedian -- a person. Perhaps YOU should have been more clear about what YOU mean.

LOL! Read the OP...even RGS would have understood it.

LOL! Fuck off, huh? I read. Not my fault your boy assumed.