The War on Festivus

[IsaacNewton]

That time of year is quickly approaching when the war on Festivus by con-media and Bile Ori'lie will be in full force. Walmart greeters who greet people with 'Happy Festivus' will be 're-trained' to say 'Happy Holidays'.

Aluminum pole dealers will be asked to provide 'trees' against their beliefs.

The airing of grievances will be banned in churches and manger scenes, with the plastic Jesus, all over the country.

Feats of strength will be seen by Faux News as 'the liberal media trying to force gun control on everyone'. (Yes I know the two are not related, duhhhh).

And George will once again be forced to fight his father at the urging of his boss Kruger.

 

[September]

I actually love so many of the spiritual/ religious traditions around Christmas and the Winter Solstice, from ancient Pagan traditions to the way it is celebrated by modern Catholics and Christians... like when you are in some grand temple of God and you've got a choir singing hauntingly beautiful "Christmas" songs...



...just gives you that feeling that redemption is possible no matter how lost or fallen you have become.

I'm also fascinated with the way astronomy, the earth and nature have influenced many of these cultures' traditions and stories.

What I do not like about Christmas though is the ridiculous character of Santa Claus and America's obsession with it. I mean, giving and receiving presents is awesome but take Santa out and put religion/ spirituality back in...

​

 

[IsaacNewton]

I actually love so many of the spiritual/ religious traditions around Christmas and the Winter Solstice, from ancient Pagan traditions to the way it is celebrated by modern Catholics and Christians... like when you are in some grand temple of God and you've got a choir singing hauntingly beautiful "Christmas" songs...



...just gives you that feeling that redemption is possible no matter how lost or fallen you have become.

I'm also fascinated with the way astronomy, the earth and nature have influenced many of these cultures' traditions and stories.

What I do not like about Christmas though is the ridiculous character of Santa Claus and America's obsession with it. I mean, giving and receiving presents is awesome but take Santa out and put religion/ spirituality back in...

​

I also love Christmas. The music is great, the food is awesome, the drinking is nonstop as it should be, people are generally friendlier and there is a cool feeling in the air. And I an agnostic!

The point of the post is to shine a light on the ridiculous claim of a fake 'war on Christmas'. One would think that clear.

 

[defcon4]

 

[defcon4]

 

[guno]

Praise be the holy pole of aluminum!!

Happy Festivus... for the Rest of Us!

Happy Festivus | A Festivus for the Rest of Us! | Festivus Feats of Strength, Festivus Airing of Grievances, Festivus Pole, Festivus Traditions

 

[Rustic]

That time of year is quickly approaching when the war on Festivus by con-media and Bile Ori'lie will be in full force. Walmart greeters who greet people with 'Happy Festivus' will be 're-trained' to say 'Happy Holidays'.

Aluminum pole dealers will be asked to provide 'trees' against their beliefs.

The airing of grievances will be banned in churches and manger scenes, with the plastic Jesus, all over the country.

Feats of strength will be seen by Faux News as 'the liberal media trying to force gun control on everyone'. (Yes I know the two are not related, duhhhh).

And George will once again be forced to fight his father at the urging of his boss Kruger.

Ya, buy more guns and ammo... Nothing looks better than an ar under the tree for your spouse...

 

[defcon4]

 

[bedowin62]

YAWN

why dont left-wing nutjobs prove there's no war on christmas by saying MERRY CHRISTMAS to everyone they meet this Christmas season??????

 

[IsaacNewton]

YAWN

why dont left-wing nutjobs prove there's no war on christmas by saying MERRY CHRISTMAS to everyone they meet this Christmas season??????

Don't have to prove something that doesn't exist.

 

[NightFox]

Don't have to prove something that doesn't exist.

FACT: There is a war on Christmas, I know this because I'm the one waging it, I launched this campaign of utter destruction because of the following grievances:

* Too many goddamn people in the mall, when all I want to do is pick an extra pair of socks I have to wade through a sea of humanity most of whom haven't figured out that civilized people don't pay with cash anymore.
* Real Christmas trees suck, I'm sick and tired of all the pine needles scattered all over my street, if I wanted to live in the forest I'd move to Alaska.
* What's up with this freaking wrapping paper nonsense? if I wanted to learn origami I would have taken that class in college.
* I don't like getting gifts, if I wanted an ugly tie I'd go buy one for myself.
* Santa Claus is an asshole, 'nuff said.

Merry Christmas muthafuckas

 

[BluesLegend]

The point of the post is to shine a light on the ridiculous claim of a fake 'war on Christmas'. One would think that clear.

Ah, there are no bigger buzz kills than liberals I tell you.

 

[IsaacNewton]

Its too early for Christmas. Let's stay on Thanksgiving.

I like real trees, they make the house smell good. Santa is not an asshole, he just steals cookies. Its not like he's lifting your iPhone. Wrapping paper is option, just use a paper bag and not the one Carly Fiorina is using. I don't mind many people at the mall once a year but, yeah, let's not use a check (which they write out AFTER everything has been tabulated and the cashier is waiting) or count out your dimes when the line is 12 people long. I'm surprised you get gifts.

Meant lighthearted. Happy Halloween!

 

[Wyatt earp]

Lmao got to love liberals and the PC police, ya read the story's , ya go to local places where it used to be Merry Christmas turned into Happy Holidays..

Yet they wave a magic wand and say " " Repeat after me all is good, no social changes are taking place, it is the same holiday celebration as the 50s..."

Libs are a joke and they don't even know it.

 

[Wyatt earp]

That time of year is quickly approaching when the war on Festivus by con-media and Bile Ori'lie will be in full force. Walmart greeters who greet people with 'Happy Festivus' will be 're-trained' to say 'Happy Holidays'.

Aluminum pole dealers will be asked to provide 'trees' against their beliefs.

The airing of grievances will be banned in churches and manger scenes, with the plastic Jesus, all over the country.

Feats of strength will be seen by Faux News as 'the liberal media trying to force gun control on everyone'. (Yes I know the two are not related, duhhhh).

And George will once again be forced to fight his father at the urging of his boss Kruger.

From a Retailer blog


Retailers: Should You Say Merry Christmas in Your Retail Store?


And that’s why I believe pointedly saying “Merry Christmas” to 100% of your customers is wrong. It is not inclusive for 25% of them

 

[NightFox]

And that’s why I believe pointedly saying “Merry Christmas” to 100% of your customers is wrong. It is not inclusive for 25% of them

I have a solution for the retailers .. "Merry <state your name and holiday preference>, now go forth and be not offended you thin skinned prick" ......

 

[BluesLegend]

When will Obama and you Christian hating libs tell Muslims to stop displaying their beliefs and traditions in public?

 

[Rustic]

South Dakota Army National Guard’s 155th Engineer Company, which specializes in building base camps, prisoner facilities and vertical structures used by combat teams.

Is over there now at war, I went down earlier and sent a Christmas card to the unit, I will see if it comes back...

 

[SwimExpert]

The airing of grievances and feats of strength is a thousands years old tradition.

 

[IsaacNewton]

Another year comes around and with the War on Christmas the War on Festivus is sure to get hot again. We used the aluminum poll, which admittedly has a high tensil strength to weight ration, to pry open the garage door when the left spring broke and the pole bent. So off to the aluminum pole lot to get a new pole. The neighbors are promising to air a lot of grievances this year, though they seem to view that as a year-round tradition.

Embrace your roots! And let us have a peaceful Festivus this year, after the feats of strength.

FestivusWeb.com - Happy Festivus! A Festivus for the Rest of Us!

Woman Charged with Attempted Murder after Beating Husband with ‘Festivus Pole’