Fountain of Youth: An Eco-Dracula

Abishai100

VIP Member
Sep 22, 2013
4,957
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I'm retiring from Internet-blogging, but I wanted to post an eco-consciousness 'vignette,' since the issue is of great importance to me (and I hope it will be a vital issue for the Trump Administration as well!).


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Three world-travellers named Brandon, Sam, and Adrien decided to take a break from their bar-hopping 'madness' and think about something more metaphysically serious. So the three (referring to themselves affectionately as The Three Amigos) decided to go questing for the fabled Fountain of Youth (rumored to be somewhere in Florida or South America). Brandon believed it was somewhere in Florida, but Adrien believed it was somewhere in Argentina. Sam proposed they look in both places, and the other two amigos agreed.

The Three Amigos left behind their world of luxury and world-travelling frills and hotel-hopping and bar-fun and went seriously questing for the Fountain of Youth. Adrien remarked that Starbucks was like a 'fluid of vitality' in this modern world of consumerism and commerce-gauged 'etiquette' (i.e., Wall Street), while Brandon reminded everyone that the timeless value of eco-consciousness (even in times of great industrialization and/or tech-gauged communications sophistication) should reinforce the notion that the Fountain of Youth could in fact be somewhere in an 'ethereal plane' mortals merely access 'informally' when they purchase bottled spring-water from supermarkets.

Sam suggested that The Three Amigos follow the footsteps of the old colonialization-era explorers who believed the Fountain of Youth was in Florida (the 'New World'). The Three Amigos found an eerie lake in the middle of an idyllic forest in Florida where they wondered if they should drink and 'test' the water (for simple conversational fun!) but Adrien suggested that the lake could be very dirty. The Three Amigos decided the lake was not the Fountain of Youth so they went to Argentina (as Adrien originally suggested). When they arrived in Argentina, they found an equally eerie lake in an equally idyllic forest and wondered if they should drink from the lake.

ADRIEN: Guys, when I was a young boy living in Madrid (Spain), a gypsy-woman told me of 'eerie waters.'
SAM: You're so sentimental sometimes, Adrien. I say we drink from this Argentine lake and see what happens!
BRANDON: Wait...what if this lake is polluted too? Maybe we should consult some national tour guide.

ADRIEN: Listen...that gypsy-woman told me that the Fountain of Youth is 'everywhere' (even in Earth-mist!).
SAM: You sound poetic (and silly), amigo. The Fountain of Youth has to be...somewhere.
BRANDON: Let's take a 'sample' of this Argentine lake-water back to America with us and run tests.

ADRIEN: No, I don't want to be a 'mad scientist.' Let's just take photos and then share them on Facebook...
SAM: Now that's boring. Who cares on Facebook whether or not we believe this Argentine lake is special?
BRANDON: Actually, Adrien's idea is not bad...we can make all kinds of eco-activism minded jokes.

ADRIEN: It's agreed then. We'll post photos of this lake and say, "Look! The Fountain of Youth is polluted."
SAM: Alright, but let's not step on the toes of mystics and superstitious folklore aficionados.
BRANDON: Of course not; we'll be very respectful and tell people we're sincere about eco-consciousness.

ADRIEN: It's ironic, my Three Amigos, that while searching for the Fountain of Youth we found 'optimism.'
SAM: Maybe 'TrumpUSA' will actually justify such 'eco-optimism.'
BRANDON: It's a nasty thought --- "Could the Fountain of Youth be polluted by manmade waste?"

ADRIEN: There's nothing wrong with civilization-oriented paranoia...
SAM: Who knows(?), we might find out this Argentine lake was indeed(!) the fabled Fountain of Youth.
BRANDON: Our girlfriends will be sooo impressed.

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