Guys......Did You Want To Grow Up To Be (mostly) Like Your Father?

[1srelluc]

While my dad had his faults like any other man he was my hero......I would have counted myself very fortunate indeed to have mirrored him in most ways.

While I think I did plenty OK I missed the mark a bit upon reflection.....I never took to trapping the way he did as I viewed it as a chore but I'm a better hunter/fisherman so it's a wash I guess.

That and he was a lot more outgoing than I am. Given his job (old school police officer to police chief) I guess he had to be.

He despised local politics where I'm vocal and stand in their shit with both feet when need be.

Dad under arrow.....Sometime in the early 60s....He passed in 2008 at 75.

 

[WinterBorn]

Absolutely not. I wanted to be cool. I had great plans.

It wasn't until I was 19 or so that I realized I would be lucky to be half as cool as my Dad was.

 

[miketx]

While my dad had his faults like any other man he was my hero......I would have counted myself very fortunate indeed to have mirrored him in most ways.

While I think I did plenty OK I missed the mark a bit upon reflection.....I never took to trapping the way he did as I viewed it as a chore but I'm a better hunter/fisherman so it's a wash I guess.

That and he was a lot more outgoing than I am. Given his job (old school police officer to police chief) I guess he had to be.

He despised local politics where I'm vocal and stand in their shit with both feet when need be.

Dad under arrow.....Sometime in the early 60s....He passed in 2008 at 75.

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Nope, never knew my dad, just my stepdad and I didn't want to be anything like him. I did meet my dad in the late 80's and he was guilt ridden over what happened. I was not mean to him, but when he left I didn't contact him much after. He died of cancer in 92 at 62. Never knew him. He wanted us to be a family again and I had a half brother in California and dad had his wife and after he died his best friend in Arkansas called me to tell me the service was being held outside Hot Springs at the Oma cemetery and I said I would come. I asked if it was open casket or not, I don't know why, but I did. He was silent for a moment and then said how the family must have kept me in the dark because he was cremated in California yesterday and his ashes spread over the Pacific ocean. I didn't go.

But I can't blame him for divorcing my bitch ass mother.

 

[Alan Stallion]

No. Never met my father.
Would never do the same to any of my offspring.

 

[Bob Blaylock]

My father was a very good man, and a great role model. I don't know that I ever gave much thought to how who I wanted to be matched up with who he was. Looking back, I can see a great deal of who he was in who I have become. In some ways, he was much greater than I will ever be, and perhaps there are some ways in which I have achieved more greatness than he had.

To turn out exactly like him would not be a bad thing at all. But then nether is it to have turned out to be who and what I am.

 

[Moonglow]

No, I never wanted to be like my dad, oh Hell no!

 

[odanny]

Definitely not. My dad was a raging alcoholic and was absent for most of my childhood. It was only after he sobered up, when I was an adult, that I had any type of relationship with him. That only lasted around 5 years before he died of cancer. I never confronted him about what he was like growing up, as I felt that he was already broken over it, and it would have felt like kicking someone when they were down. I rarely imbibe these days, unlike my 20's, when I did all the time, and I can thank memories of my father for that. I guess he was good for one thing, anyway.

 

[yidnar]

No, I never wanted to be like my dad, oh Hell no!

apparently your dad was an honest brave intelligent person and a real man .

 

[SLAX]

While my dad had his faults like any other man he was my hero......I would have counted myself very fortunate indeed to have mirrored him in most ways.

While I think I did plenty OK I missed the mark a bit upon reflection.....I never took to trapping the way he did as I viewed it as a chore but I'm a better hunter/fisherman so it's a wash I guess.

That and he was a lot more outgoing than I am. Given his job (old school police officer to police chief) I guess he had to be.

He despised local politics where I'm vocal and stand in their shit with both feet when need be.

Dad under arrow.....Sometime in the early 60s....He passed in 2008 at 75.

View attachment 692662

I had a great father so I would have to say YEAH for the most part I wanted to be somewhat like my dad.
May he rest in peace.
In many ways I also wanted to be like my Mom. I think I'm a good combination of both.

 

[Moonglow]

apparently your dad was a good brave person and a real man with a high iq .

Apparently, you never knew him.

 

[MisterBeale]

We are all like our fathers, whether we care to admit it, or not.

We manifest our own attitudes, ideas, and our own personalities about life, in very similar ways, but our personalities, and the way we go about expressing those differences, are largely the same, or very, VERY similar to our fathers. In a lot of ways, it is why fathers and sons start to find conflict when they reach early teens. What we see in eachother, is a reflection of what we judge or see as shortcomings in ourselves.

I see a lot of guys, go on about how they are totally different. But, when it comes down to it, we are all the same as our dads, in the way we are different from our dads.


At least, our biological dads. Even if we never met the guy. It has to do with brain chemistry.

I once asked dad. . . (At a rare time when we were having a civil calm period, did grandpa have a hard time with his anger, and not being judgemental and super critical when he was in his prime?)

Of course.

So, how did that manifest. . ???

And how does this lead to independent thinking, critical thinking, and a skeptical attitude? And of course, JUDGEMENT.

We are, after all, a combination, of nature and nurture.


Knowing all this? I now am fairly confident to say, I have a terrific relationship with my son. He always still wants a huge from me, and he is twenty-one. My dad adores him.

And no, he is not gay, he is in a very tight relationship with his fiance', has been since eighteen.

 

[mudwhistle]

While my dad had his faults like any other man he was my hero......I would have counted myself very fortunate indeed to have mirrored him in most ways.

While I think I did plenty OK I missed the mark a bit upon reflection.....I never took to trapping the way he did as I viewed it as a chore but I'm a better hunter/fisherman so it's a wash I guess.

That and he was a lot more outgoing than I am. Given his job (old school police officer to police chief) I guess he had to be.

He despised local politics where I'm vocal and stand in their shit with both feet when need be.

Dad under arrow.....Sometime in the early 60s....He passed in 2008 at 75.

View attachment 692662

Nope. My Dad wasn't somebody I admired.

 

[Baron Von Murderpaws]

Never had one. Was raised by my grandma till I was 8.

I never wanted to be like anybody anyway. I wanted to figure out how to be me.

 

[whitehall]

The informal poll seems to narrow down to liberals who hated their absentee fathers and conservatives who wanted to emulate their fathers. A psychologist could do a lot with this data.

 

[miketx]

The informal poll seems to narrow down to liberals who hated their absentee fathers and conservatives who wanted to emulate their fathers. A psychologist could do a lot with this data.

I'm not a liberal.

 

[AZrailwhale]

I never had a father, my “father figure” was my maternal grandfather who was a drunk, abuser and coward. He abused my grandmother and I until at eleven years of age I threatened to kill him the next time he laid a hand on either one of us. He abandoned us after that. Good riddance to bad garbage. He died alone and crazy from alcoholism. I’ve done everything I could do to be different from him.

 

[JOSweetHeart]

^^^ I pray that things only got better for you after he left.

God bless you and your family always!!!

Holly

 

[odanny]

The informal poll seems to narrow down to liberals who hated their absentee fathers and conservatives who wanted to emulate their fathers. A psychologist could do a lot with this data.

I didn't hate my father. Your myopic thinking on the subject mirrors your other contributions here.

 

[Blues Man]

Hell no

My father was a deadbeat alcoholic