TemplarKormac
Political Atheist
Lately, it seems as if more and more friendships are contingent on political views. It is saddening to say the least. I was born in a generation where that wasn't always the case, it remains so with me. I was watching a story on the news yesterday about Cal Thomas and Bob Beckel, who have been good friends for decades. Thomas is a Conservative columnist, Beckel is a Democratic strategist, and an advisor to the ill fated Mondale campaign. I heard Cal Thomas mentioning how dear to him Beckel was as a friend, and so on. What that told me, was that mature adults with heads on their shoulders don't let politics get in the way of a good friendship.
Politics can be derisive, as anyone on this board can attest. It can get downright ugly at times. Foxfyre and syrenn have done superb jobs in bridging that gap between politics and friendship, by eliminating politics from the discussion altogether. Although not perfect, the efforts they have put into The Coffee Shop and The Tavern are acts of valorous dedication to the cohesion of the posting community, but I digress.
I have fallen victim to the friendships that have ended over political viewpoints. In January 2011, I met a woman from my hometown living in Germany. Until this past March we had grown close as friends. During the holiday season that year, she invited me to dinner, only to inform me that she was a lesbian. Unfortunately I didn't hear her introduce her partner, as she merely introduced her partner to me, never once indicating such a revelation. However, later, the oppression of my political views were becoming apparent. She reminded me that she was homosexual, much to my amazement, in a Facebook conversation that arose from some comments I made on another political forum. I had to watch what I said around her and tone down my statements in order to keep from offending her.
This woman helped me look for employment, put in good words to the bigwigs around town and asked them to look out for me if I should come calling. It was a good friendship, which lasted just over a year and a half. She had me going, and I didn't let her being lesbian get in the way of a meaningful friendship. But alas, she did. It came to a head right before the Supreme Court ruling on gay marriage. I had my view and she had hers, ultimately we parted ways when for some unknown reason she got the idea that I didn't tolerate her ways. I didn't. But I never brought it up. I was tolerant and more than generous to her beliefs.
When her dog died, I was there for her, reaching out. I didn't for the slightest reason let politics or social issues enter in. But somehow, me being a Christian, or a Republican (at the time) finally got to her. She succumbed to the curse of identity politics. This woman presented me with an impossible and unfair dilemma. She was due to become married to her partner in June. She asked me if I would be supportive of her decision, and when I said I would not, stating my religious beliefs, wishing her all of the best, she launched into a verbal tirade; a tirade only expected from someone of her political standpoint. We went our separate ways not soon after. She ended our friendship on something as petty as my view on gay marriage. I made it clear she was not going to suppress my free speech and make our friendship contingent on my compliance.
I'm telling you now, do not let politics damage or end your friendships. Don't be so petty as to allow it to happen. Real friends don't judge you by your viewpoints, but your actions as a person. Don't give in to the practice of prejudging someone. Don't allow yourself to see someone as a Republican or Democrat only to judge their character from that affiliation.
True friendships endure the test of politics, they stand the rigors of religious and cultural differences. Keep your friends close and be tolerant, but also be willing to speak your mind. If you and your friends can agree to tolerate each others differences, then such a friendship is bound to prosper. If not, you are merely wasting your time.
Politics can be derisive, as anyone on this board can attest. It can get downright ugly at times. Foxfyre and syrenn have done superb jobs in bridging that gap between politics and friendship, by eliminating politics from the discussion altogether. Although not perfect, the efforts they have put into The Coffee Shop and The Tavern are acts of valorous dedication to the cohesion of the posting community, but I digress.
I have fallen victim to the friendships that have ended over political viewpoints. In January 2011, I met a woman from my hometown living in Germany. Until this past March we had grown close as friends. During the holiday season that year, she invited me to dinner, only to inform me that she was a lesbian. Unfortunately I didn't hear her introduce her partner, as she merely introduced her partner to me, never once indicating such a revelation. However, later, the oppression of my political views were becoming apparent. She reminded me that she was homosexual, much to my amazement, in a Facebook conversation that arose from some comments I made on another political forum. I had to watch what I said around her and tone down my statements in order to keep from offending her.
This woman helped me look for employment, put in good words to the bigwigs around town and asked them to look out for me if I should come calling. It was a good friendship, which lasted just over a year and a half. She had me going, and I didn't let her being lesbian get in the way of a meaningful friendship. But alas, she did. It came to a head right before the Supreme Court ruling on gay marriage. I had my view and she had hers, ultimately we parted ways when for some unknown reason she got the idea that I didn't tolerate her ways. I didn't. But I never brought it up. I was tolerant and more than generous to her beliefs.
When her dog died, I was there for her, reaching out. I didn't for the slightest reason let politics or social issues enter in. But somehow, me being a Christian, or a Republican (at the time) finally got to her. She succumbed to the curse of identity politics. This woman presented me with an impossible and unfair dilemma. She was due to become married to her partner in June. She asked me if I would be supportive of her decision, and when I said I would not, stating my religious beliefs, wishing her all of the best, she launched into a verbal tirade; a tirade only expected from someone of her political standpoint. We went our separate ways not soon after. She ended our friendship on something as petty as my view on gay marriage. I made it clear she was not going to suppress my free speech and make our friendship contingent on my compliance.
I'm telling you now, do not let politics damage or end your friendships. Don't be so petty as to allow it to happen. Real friends don't judge you by your viewpoints, but your actions as a person. Don't give in to the practice of prejudging someone. Don't allow yourself to see someone as a Republican or Democrat only to judge their character from that affiliation.
True friendships endure the test of politics, they stand the rigors of religious and cultural differences. Keep your friends close and be tolerant, but also be willing to speak your mind. If you and your friends can agree to tolerate each others differences, then such a friendship is bound to prosper. If not, you are merely wasting your time.
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