The democrat the republican and the Arab terrorist

[miketx]

A dem politician, a rep politician and an Arab terrorist died and found themselves outside the pearly gates. St Peter comes out to greet them and says, you know from the data we have on you three, it appears that before your current occupations, you were all in the construction business. Is that right? All three said it was.

So St. Pete told them the pearly gates were in need of repair and wondered if they could give him some repair estimates. Sure they all said so Pete tells the Arab to look it over. He does and comes back and says he can fix it for 600 dollars. St Pete says, how did you arrive at that amount? The Arab says 200 for materials, 200 for labor and 200 for profit. St. Pete said he'll think about it.

Then he tells the the republican to look it over. Ok, he says, but when I used to do this work we did only top quality stuff. It won't be cheap but it will be good! So he looks at the gates and come back and says 3000 dollars. 3000 dollars, St. Pete says? How did you figure that. Well he says, 1000 for materials, 1000 for labor and 1000 for profit. St Pete says he'll think about it.

So he tells the Dem to check it out and the Dem says that he don't even have to look at the gates. He can do it 2600 dollars. So how's that says the Saint? Easy the dem says, 1000 for you, 1000 for me, and 600 to pay the towel head to fix it!

 

[BULLDOG]

A Democrat, a Republican and miketx walked into a bar and all ordered beer. When the bartender asked for payment, the Democrat and the Republican both said miketx had promised to pay for them all. As he unzipped his pants, the bartender said "ok, but next time you have to have cash."