*This Story TO End ALL Stories*

[chesswarsnow]

Sorry bout that,


1. I got one very unusual story to tell, who's in?


Regards,
SirJamesofTexas

 

[chesswarsnow]

Sorry bout that,


1. Its a long story.
2. Well who's up for it?


Regards,
SirJamesofTexas

 

[Billy_Kinetta]

Want to hear a dirty story?
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A pig fell in the mud.

Send my Nobel via The William Morris Agency. Thank you.

 

[MaryL]

I lived trough the sixties, watched men parachute over rainbows above cherry creek reservoir and I held hands with my dad. There weren't any illegal aliens from Mexico here then to muddy the waters and there wasn't any politicians pandering, they just listened to Americans...ah, the good old days...

 

[Moonglow]

JFC get to the point!


There is no point...

 

[Moonglow]

I lived trough the sixties, watched men parachute over rainbows above cherry creek reservoir and I held hands with my dad. There weren't any illegal aliens from Mexico here then to muddy the waters and there wasn't any politicians pandering, they just listened to Americans...ah, the good old days...

Except for the hair grease, start a damn fire.

 

[Moonglow]

Where is the STFU button?

 

[chesswarsnow]

Sorry bout that, *THIS IS A ABSOLUTE TRUE STORY*


1. As it were a few years ago, my brother and I went on a trip to the hill country of Texas, down near the great city of San Antonio, remember the Alamo, where the deer and the antelope play, on our mission we went to retrieve an rv, ( 1978 Datsun motor home it sits on a dully axle, quite small ) that I bought off Craigslist, from a rather older man and his wife for 400.00 the city is near me of Bedford, Texas, we drove over there to Bedford and met in a parking lot of a Kroger Grocery Store parking lot to exchange the cash for the title, there was another buyer who didn't show up for which I told the seller if he does not show up I will for sure buy it and bring over the cash right away. So that weekend the guy didn't show up, and we went on Sunday to seal the deal. So I brought the cash in my pocket and went to meet the seller and his wife. They were older I would say at least 70 years of age, and he no longer hunted at his deer lease where the Datsun motor home was, west of San Antonio, way out next to nowhere, like I said where the deers lived, and other wild animals, for which I will elaborate on later, as this story progresses.

*the story will continue*

As it were this was a very private deer lease, and it wasn't going to be easy to extract it, so I asked the man I bought it from "Hey can we go down one night earlier and sleep in it and then bring it back to the DFW area the next morning, he said, "Let me check" I said "Okay let me know" so he called me a few days later on Wednesday and said, "No we couldn't at all just go get it on a weekend morning and the other holders of the deer lease would allow me in to fetch the motor home", I agreed. (I did think that was strange they wouldn't let me in there but to only get the rv. So the plan was to drive down there real early on Saturday morning, I set my alarm clock for 3 am, then at 3 am, I woke up and realized, it was way too early so I went back to sleep for a couple hours....

*It will continue*

So I awoke, was hungry and made a sandwich for which I ate, and washed it down with coffee. Anyway my brother was on my land where I live, and I went and woke him up and we loaded up in the car, which is a large SUV, and we put the location in the GPS on the cell phone, and launched off, having already filled the gas tank the night before. So we were off trucking down towards San Antonio. Having already called ahead to reserve a car dolly in a small one light town very near to where the deer lease was, which the deer lease was actually next to nowhere.

*continue*

Regards,
SirJamesofTexas

 

[Moonglow]

I lived in those areas and they weren't nothing more than ant hills.

 

[chesswarsnow]

Sorry bout that,

1. Funny you should mention a fire.


Regards,
SirJamesofTexas

I lived trough the sixties, watched men parachute over rainbows above cherry creek reservoir and I held hands with my dad. There weren't any illegal aliens from Mexico here then to muddy the waters and there wasn't any politicians pandering, they just listened to Americans...ah, the good old days...

Except for the hair grease, start a damn fire.

 

[Moonglow]

Must have to pee...

 

[chesswarsnow]

Sorry bout that, *THIS IS A ABSOLUTE TRUE STORY*


1. As it were a few years ago, my brother and I went on a trip to the hill country of Texas, down near the great city of San Antonio, remember the Alamo, where the deer and the antelope play, on our mission we went to retrieve an rv, ( 1978 Datsun motor home it sits on a dully axle, quite small ) that I bought off Craigslist, from a rather older man and his wife for 400.00 the city is near me of Bedford, Texas, we drove over there to Bedford and met in a parking lot of a Kroger Grocery Store parking lot to exchange the cash for the title, there was another buyer who didn't show up for which I told the seller if he does not show up I will for sure buy it and bring over the cash right away. So that weekend the guy didn't show up, and we went on Sunday to seal the deal. So I brought the cash in my pocket and went to meet the seller and his wife. They were older I would say at least 70 years of age, and he no longer hunted at his deer lease where the Datsun motor home was, west of San Antonio, way out next to nowhere, like I said where the deers lived, and other wild animals, for which I will elaborate on later, as this story progresses.

*the story will continue*

As it were this was a very private deer lease, and it wasn't going to be easy to extract it, so I asked the man I bought it from "Hey can we go down one night earlier and sleep in it and then bring it back to the DFW area the next morning, he said, "Let me check" I said "Okay let me know" so he called me a few days later on Wednesday and said, "No we couldn't at all just go get it on a weekend morning and the other holders of the deer lease would allow me in to fetch the motor home", I agreed. (I did think that was strange they wouldn't let me in there but to only get the rv. So the plan was to drive down there real early on Saturday morning, I set my alarm clock for 3 am, then at 3 am, I woke up and realized, it was way too early so I went back to sleep for a couple hours....

*It will continue*

So I awoke, was hungry and made a sandwich for which I ate, and washed it down with coffee. Anyway my brother was on my land where I live, and I went and woke him up and we loaded up in the car, which is a large SUV, and we put the location in the GPS on the cell phone, and launched off, having already filled the gas tank the night before. So we were off trucking down towards San Antonio. Having already called ahead to reserve a car dolly in a small one light town very near to where the deer lease was, which the deer lease was actually next to nowhere.

*continue*


*Continued*

So here we go flying down the freeway to pick up this Datsun rv, got it on cruz, takes about 2.5 to 3 hours to get to the small town to pick up car dolly, which there we were. So we get it and hook it up to the SUV, and we call these guys at the deer lease, maybe it was 8 am on Saturday morning, so they answer I tell them hey I'm not far away maybe 30 miles and I'm now picking up the car dolly, and should be there in about 30 mins, they said "Ok we are here waiting for you at gate." I say, "Okay see you soon", and we launch off again towards to deer lease, so here we come rolling up in about 30 mins, and they are there at the gate with two huge pickups, looking around at us like we are trouble, of course we weren't but anyways we drive up to them and tell them who we are and why were are there, they said "Okay lets open the gate" so they did, and they drove about 200 yards and come to a second gate, so they jump out and unlock it and fling it open and we all drive in, we were following them, so we drove only about 300 yards and there it was the Datsun RV, already pushed up from where it sit, maybe they pushed in 200 yards or more we never got a good look where there camp site was, and I think thats the way they wanted it. So we got out and looked it over a little, seemed fine, and they said, " Hey y'all need help getting it up on your car dolly?" I said "Sure thank you", so they altogether three made it look easy to push the Datsun RV up on the car dolly, we basically watched. So anyway we tied it down with straps that are built into the car dolly, shook their hands and re-launched off back towards Fort Worth, and so it was. So as we passed through that little town where we got the car dolly I told my brother "hey maybe we should get some gas?" . So we looked for a gas station, we rolled up on one and the gas was like 2.59 a gallon, and I had just filled the tank for like 2.07 the night before last in Fort Worth, I says to brother, "Ahh hell thats to freakin high bro, think we should look for a cheaper gas station?" he says back to me, "Yeah lets get gas at the next station", so we kept going, so we ended up leaving that town, but there was another little town just a few miles ahead, so we kept going, anyway we had a quarter tank so it was fine. So here we rolled up into this next town, and son of a gun!, the gas there was 2.59 a gallon too, and I says to my bro as we drove past the gas station, "Thats too high man!" he agreed and we kept driving. After we had driven maybe ten minutes I turned to my bro and said, " Hey do you think maybe we should turn around and go fill up at that last station?" He said, "No we will be fine." so I kept driving. After about another ten minutes of driving I decided to turn on my GPS for the ride back and kinda figure out where the next town was. So as I was looking I noticed the next town was far away, and I says to my bro, "Oh shat bro the next town is very far away, and we may not make it." he says back to me, "No we will make it." I says, I don't know man it looks really far." looking at my GPS map, he says, Don't go negative we will make it, if you just stop going negative!". Of course I'm still thinking, oh shat we ain't going to make it, after a while maybe 5 minutes I decided to tell my bro, "Hey look here at my cell phone, I'm going to drop a pin on my GPS, as to where I believe we will run out of gas!," He doesn't say anything or protest my negativity, and I drop it. so about that time I see a sign on the side of the road, the sign said, 35 miles to the next gas station, I looked down at my computer on the dash board it too said 35 miles worth of gas left, well that was reassuring for about 30 seconds, then there that thought was again, "I don't think we will make it", so I tell my bro that, anyways he says nothing, after a little while I see another sign it says 29 miles to next gas station, I look down at the dash board again and yep it says 29 miles worth of fuel left, briefly I feel assured, like 10 seconds, but what are we going to do at that point its much further back to the last gas station so here we go, I did decide to slow down to 55 to conserve fuel. After a while I turned to my bro and says, "Hey bro looks like we get to meet NEW PEOPLE real soon" He knew what I meant, but we keep plugging along nothing else to do. So I says to my bro, "Hey start throwing shat out to lighten to load so we don't run out of gas", he giggles cause it was funny, he knew I was joking. So anyway we had like 15 miles worth of gas for thats what the dash computer said, but we just keep it on cruz at 55, rolling along. So we keep trucking pulling the Datsun RV, soon we got like 3 miles left of gas left, and up ahead in the distance I see a white SUV with its nose out poking towards to street. I says to me bro, "Hey that looks like a sheriffs car lets pull over to ask him to help us, seeing he's a public servant, he doesn't disagree, so we roll up on the white SUV, and as we just about get to the driveway the driver of the car punches the gas like they are going to speed off, I wave at the driver to stop, and thats when we noticed it was a female driver, I rolled down my bros window and said to her " We are bout to run out of gas!" she says the gas station is only 3 miles ahead, I looked down and my dash computer say we got 2 miles worth of gas, which I relayed that to her, I then asked her if she would follow us to the station, she said she would, so we launched off, we her following close behind, so after a short time we were still driving at 55 mile per hour, we had no gas by the dash board computer, literally running on empty, so so traveled a good while with gas just trucking along I think we traveled at least two mile saying 0 on the dash, then poof we were coasting, but the road was really flat and we didn't lose speed for a long time just coasting, there was the lady behind us and no one else, so after idd say 1-2 miles we started to slow down, the weight of the rv kept us going, so finally my bro says, "Are you going to pull over?" I says, "Sure when we slow down more" so we went another 300-400 yards, then I pull over and parked it, I get out and walk back to the lady SUV and says, "Yep I ran out of gas" she says "Hop in I will take you to get some", so I did. So we launch off going to Allsups gas station she says just up ahead, well it was like 2 miles up to the gas station at that point, so she was way off one her estimate, I didn't bring it up, as we were going to Allsups we drove past 3-M Corporation they make packaging tapes there , she tells me she used to work there, and then she tells me, "Hey see that gate right there?" it was basically right across the street from 3-M, it was a huge stone gate, sand stone, must of been 15' tall, she says to me "My husband is a professional hunter and a rich dude owns that land an oil man, thats all it is is land 50 acres, and her husband has the exclusive rights to hunt hogs on the land" all fenced in it was she says, then she says, he takes hunters out there with hunting dogs, and the hunters have to kill the hogs with a knife, when the dogs flush them out of the bushes, " I'm thinking oh hell you gotta be a serious hunter to want to kill a freakin 400 pound hog with a freakin knife." but anyways I don't tell her that, so anyway finally we get to the gas station, and we both go in, looking for a gas can, so there they were on the top shelf over by the deli, where they had all sorts of breakfast stuff to serve, anyways the manager just happened to be there and I asked him if he had a milk jug so I could get a gallon of gas then come back with my SUV and fill up, they had 5 gallon cans only and they cost like 30 dollars, he said, "No he didn't have one but if he knew I was filling a milk jug with gas he wouldn't allow me to do it". that is if he saw it, about that time the lady says "Hey I got an idea, and walks out the door, I follow her and as I go out the door I take a look in both trash cans, no containers in either, so I climb back in her SUV, and she says, "Hey the gas cans are much cheaper across the street at the Velero gas station", but the store is very dirty, I say." I don't mind, so we go across the street, where an Indian guys is behind the counter, I ask him for gas cans and he points over to a certain area, so I go check them out, they were 2 gallons for like 13.00 so I bought one and filled it up, then went back inside to get a drink and ahh hell, the place was nasty like no other store ive ever seen, the milk was crusty and everywhere, stuff look like shat was all over it, so I just left. Anyways I loaded up in the ladies SUV and put the 2 gallons next to my feet, and we went back to my SUV where my bro was waiting. So it didn't take long and I offered to pay the lady but she refused, she now worked for UPS and was a driver, who must do pretty well along with her husband, for she had a newish Escalade. She said, "If you get a chance to do some one good just do it", I said okay thanking her many times. So we got back to the car, I hopped out waving as she drove away, while I made it back up to my SUV, where I pulled the lever to open there gas door on my SUV, and poured in the gas. Then after closing the door, I loaded back up in the drivers seat. Then turned the key and veroom it started right up, then my bro says, " Hey see that smoke in that field there", just out his window, I says, "Yeah I see it, why do you ask?" He said well you were kinda gone for a long time and I was getting bored, and I looked over to that pile of wood and said to myself, "Hey wouldn't it funny if I went over there and lit that wood on fire and then sneek back over here!" then he looked away, and then back and he saw smoke. It puzzled him why if was now smoking, as it was still smoking when he pointed it out. So anyways I says to my bro, "You little mind fire starter!" we both laughed a little, anyway I says "Hey do you think we should tell the people at that house not far away that there was a fire there, he said, "No lets go",...I says hey wait a second, you remember how I dropped a pin as to where we will run out of gas?" he says "Yes", so I get my phone out of my pocket, and crank up the GPS, and I noticed on the map there was a little blue dot for where it pin pointed exactly where we were, and over there about 150 feet on the side of the road beyond the fence, was my pin I dropped, right where the spot of the fire was, exactly, you could see a pond just beyond it to the left, and another pond closer to the right, cattle ponds, where they drink water. So this burn spot was right between two ponds, in a small neck of land, exact same thing that we were seeing was on the GPS.


Regards,
SirJamesofTexas[/QUOTE]

 

[chesswarsnow]

Sorry bout that,

1. So many people read it but not one made a comment, I guess so many people had blown minds.
2. The truth has a way of shutting people up.



Regards,
SirJamesofTexas

 

[Gracie]

I was waiting for the big reveal. There isn't one.

 

[chesswarsnow]

Sorry bout that,

1. I'm sorry you don't understand the story.
2. And are unable to see the impossible is indeed possible.
3. What is is I guess.

Regards,
SirJamesofTexas

 

[chesswarsnow]

Sorry bout that,

1. Its amazing that everyone who read the story doesn't understand the story to end ALL stories.
2. Basically the pin point I dropped was right where the smoke was coming from and my car was right there at this pin drop. The possibility of this ever happening is zero, should of never happened the first place.
3. The pin I dropped so many miles away to the exact location of the fire is not even possible.


Regards,
SirJamesofTexas

 

[CrusaderFrank]

So you killed the hog with a knife?