Announcing the NEW DC DIET! Guaranteed to make you LOSE WEIGHT.

[JimBowie1958]

It is such a simple idea, but requires five phases to implement.

Set up: Put your bathroom scale near the counter by your sink.

PHASE 1) While weighing yourself in the morning, put your thumb of your closest arm/hand on the counter; guaranteed weight* loss!

PHASE 2) This time while weighing, rest your closest arm on the counter with your whole hand. EVEN MORE WEIGHT* LOSS!

PHASE 3) This time, while weighing, place both arms on the counter. MORE WEIGHT* LOSS GUARANTEED OR YOUR MONEY BACK!

PHASE 4) This time, while weighing place both arms on the counter and rest one foot on the floor off the scale. YOU WONT BELIEVE HOW LOW THAT NEEDLE CAN GO!

PHASE 5) in gratitude for such excellent weight loss, we will raise your taxes, increase NSA snooping of you phones, internet and wireless traffic, bring in more criminals to take you and your children's job opportunities and give more tax cuts to American CORPORATIONS! Why? Because that is the American weigh! (pun intended)

*Weight as calculated by your bathroom scale.
Above terms subject to change without notice.
Adults only.
All federal, state and local income and other taxes are solely the responsibility of the dieter.
Diet advisor's not responsible for loss of motor function, coordination, eye sight, erectile dysfunction, splotchy skin, hives, indigestion, complications due to blood clots or low blood sugar while participant adheres to the DC Diet.
Your own results may vary.
Offer not sold anywhere other than this advertising opportunity.
All models are over 18 years of age.
All research statistics are blatantly flagrant if not completely invented within the last five minutes or less.
All sales final.
No animals were injured or killed in the making of this post.
Allow 4 to 6 weeks for delivery.
A.M. stands for morning.
Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is unintentional and purely coincidental.
Applicable taxes will be remitted.

Have a great day, Americans and stay calm and carry on!

All materials copyrighted.

 

[JimBowie1958]

a bump for the fat chillruns!

 

[waltky]

Granny tries to get Uncle Ferd to give up his computer, but he needs it to email his g/f's...

Man gives up Internet, loses 70kg in one year
Fri, Nov 06, 2015 - CHANGE OF DIET: After 10 years of sedentary life, a man decided to replace his smartphone with a feature phone and take control of his diet and exercise regime

Wanfang Hospital’s Obesity Prevention Center urged people to follow a balanced diet and exercise regularly, citing an example of a 47-year-old man who gave up surfing the Internet and started to exercise more and shed 70kg in one year, regaining control over his health. The man, surnamed Lin said he had always been chubby growing up, but after being injured in a car accident about 10 years ago, he fell into a sedentary lifestyle and his weight ballooned. Lin said that for the past decade, he spent nearly all of his free time sitting in front of the television, surfing the Internet or sleeping, and would sometimes sit in front of the computer for six hours while eating deep-fried food.

Lin is 1.61m tall, but his weight increased to as much as 151kg at one point, and he was diagnosed with type II diabetes, cardiovascular disease, high blood pressure, high cholesterol and high blood-sugar levels, as well as sleep apnea (pauses in breathing or instances of shallow or infrequent breathing during sleep), so he had to wear a continuous positive airway pressure nasal mask during sleep. “I always panted heavily when climbing stairs. For example, because I sleep on the third floor, I had to rest one or two times when climbing up three flights of stairs,” he said, adding that he finally decided to join a weight loss course at the hospital’s Obesity Prevention Center last year.

Lin said that in addition to maintaining a balanced diet, he decided to cut off all Internet access at home and replaced his smartphone with a feature phone to force himself to go out more often and exercise. His weight dropped to 74kg in one year. Wanfang Hospital physiotherapist Lin Yen-nung said sedentary lifestyles are one of the main reasons for obesity, and that obesity is an important factor in sleep apnea. Controlling intake of calories and following a balanced diet are both important in losing weight, center nutritionist Fang Ching-i said, adding that eating more vegetables and protein is important, as is avoiding deep-fried food, spicy hot pot and processed foods, which are usually high in fat.

Man gives up Internet, loses 70kg in one year - Taipei Times

 

[charwin95]

Jim... Just wondering. Are you just being nice today?

 

[waltky]

Exercise doesn't necessarily help with weight loss...

Study: Exercise Alone Doesn’t Help With Weight Loss
January 28, 2016 - Bad news for those of you who are still trying to work off those holiday pounds: No matter how much exercise you get, if that’s all you do, the needle on your scale is unlikely to move very much. A new study has found that while exercise is good for you, it may not help you lose weight.

That finding by Herman Pontzer, an anthropologist at New York's Hunter College, stems from an earlier study that he and his colleagues conducted looking at a tribe in Tanzania. “I did a project measuring energy expenditure in a traditional hunting and gathering population called the Hadza, who live in northern Tanzania. And they don’t have any farming and machines and anything like that. They are very active every day, walking a lot to hunt wild game and gather wild plant foods,” he said. Pontzer figured members of the Hadza tribe would burn a lot of extra calories because of their extreme physical activity. But they didn’t.

Fitness enthusiasts run through dance exercises as they work out at Tropical Park in Miami, Florida​

Researchers then decided to compare the levels of energy expenditure among a group of Westerners who enjoy modern conveniences. They looked at the number of calories burned by more than 300 Americans and Europeans who engaged in different levels of physical activity. They included very active people, those who were moderately active and couch potatoes that got little or no exercise. Researchers determined their energy expenditures by measuring the amount of carbon dioxide each participant produced. The more activity, the higher the levels of CO2.

Body adapts to activity

Researchers found that the amount of exercise people did made little difference in the number of calories they burned. “Your average energy expenditure levels, the calories you burn per day, is the same, whether you’re just moderately active or extremely physically active. We don’t see any increase in calories per day there because the body seems to be adapting to those higher levels of activity and trying to keep energy levels - calories per day - the same.” Pontzer says researchers did find that moderately active people burned about 200 more calories a day than the couch potatoes.

Gym members use a treadmill to warm up for a morning exercise class at Downsize Fitness, in Addison, Texas​

But he is quick to add that just because it doesn't help you shed pounds, you should not give up your daily workout. “You’re not off the hook there. So, exercise is really important for keeping your heart healthy and your lungs and your mind and for aging well. We have all sorts of really great benefits. But this says that... exercise maybe isn’t going to be the best tool for managing your weight and especially trying to lose weight.” Pontzer says his findings, published in the journal Current Biology, are just more proof that being healthy is all about the right combination of a sensible diet with exercise. It also might mean that there's not much benefit to be gained from overdoing it, and that moderate exercise is the way to go.

Study: Exercise Alone Doesn’t Help With Weight Loss