Did Jesus fart?

[Delta4Embassy]

Seriously. Since Christians seem to have so much difficulty imagining a gay Jesus, or even a straight but married Jesus with children, it begs the question, just how do they think of Jesus.

Did Jesus have an anus? He ate and drank so clearly he had to expel waste. And so presumedly yes Virginia, your Lord and Saviour on occasion farted. He pooped and peed too. And if he peed he had a penis. Did he hold it when he urinated? Did he do the shake twice or just put it back?

These are the things we need to know.

 

[Delta4Embassy]

Islam asked and answered these sorts of questions, at least the peeing part. In Hadiths, someone asked Mohammed in what direction he should face when he urinates. And Mohammed answered. And someone thought it important enough to jot down. So why not the same sorta questions for Jesus?

 

[Sonny Clark]

Seriously. Since Christians seem to have so much difficulty imagining a gay Jesus, or even a straight but married Jesus with children, it begs the question, just how do they think of Jesus.

Did Jesus have an anus? He ate and drank so clearly he had to expel waste. And so presumedly yes Virginia, your Lord and Saviour on occasion farted. He pooped and peed too. And if he peed he had a penis. Did he hold it when he urinated? Did he do the shake twice or just put it back?

These are the things we need to know.

Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease !!!! I can't take anymore .................... rolling on the floor laughing so hard. Your mind should be the eighth wonder of the world, seriously. Where do you get these thoughts from? Is it books, movies, the internet? Just so you'll know, this type of thinking isn't normal. When was the last time you socialized? Do you go out much? Were you neglected as a child and stayed in your room most of the time? Did you play with dolls when you were very young? Do you have brothers and sisters, and did they get most of the attention when you were growing up?

 

[Delta4Embassy]

Seriously. Since Christians seem to have so much difficulty imagining a gay Jesus, or even a straight but married Jesus with children, it begs the question, just how do they think of Jesus.

Did Jesus have an anus? He ate and drank so clearly he had to expel waste. And so presumedly yes Virginia, your Lord and Saviour on occasion farted. He pooped and peed too. And if he peed he had a penis. Did he hold it when he urinated? Did he do the shake twice or just put it back?

These are the things we need to know.

Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease !!!! I can't take anymore .................... rolling on the floor laughing so hard. Your mind should be the eighth wonder of the world, seriously. Where do you get these thoughts from? Is it books, movies, the internet? Just so you'll know, this type of thinking isn't normal. When was the last time you socialized? Do you go out much? Were you neglected as a child and stayed in your room most of the time? Did you play with dolls when you were very young? Do you have brothers and sisters, and did they get most of the attention when you were growing up?

A did a lot of acid in college.

 

[Sonny Clark]

Seriously. Since Christians seem to have so much difficulty imagining a gay Jesus, or even a straight but married Jesus with children, it begs the question, just how do they think of Jesus.

Did Jesus have an anus? He ate and drank so clearly he had to expel waste. And so presumedly yes Virginia, your Lord and Saviour on occasion farted. He pooped and peed too. And if he peed he had a penis. Did he hold it when he urinated? Did he do the shake twice or just put it back?

These are the things we need to know.

Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease !!!! I can't take anymore .................... rolling on the floor laughing so hard. Your mind should be the eighth wonder of the world, seriously. Where do you get these thoughts from? Is it books, movies, the internet? Just so you'll know, this type of thinking isn't normal. When was the last time you socialized? Do you go out much? Were you neglected as a child and stayed in your room most of the time? Did you play with dolls when you were very young? Do you have brothers and sisters, and did they get most of the attention when you were growing up?

A did a lot of acid in college.

Well, that could account for part of the problem. Are your dreams and nightmares mostly on the Sci-fi level? Can you feel a presence around you when you're alone, and can't explain it? Do you frequently talk to yourself? Have you ever seen what you thought was a ghost? Is your favorite conversation one that deals with the unusual and unnatural? Please forgive the probing on such a personal level, but I'm only trying to get a handle on this, and to better understand you posts.

 

[Meriweather]

These are the things we need to know.

These are all things humans are born knowing about themselves and all other human beings. As you need to ask about these things, clearly you are not human. So...what are you?

 

[Delta4Embassy]

These are the things we need to know.

These are all things humans are born knowing about themselves and all other human beings. As you need to ask about these things, clearly you are not human. So...what are you?

Deltan.

 

[Meriweather]

These are the things we need to know.

These are all things humans are born knowing about themselves and all other human beings. As you need to ask about these things, clearly you are not human. So...what are you?

Deltan.

Then, from the questions you have asked, logic tells me that, unlike humans, not all Deltans have the same digestive and reproduction organs? Or, perhaps you are one of a kind?

 

[hangover]

Seriously. Since Christians seem to have so much difficulty imagining a gay Jesus, or even a straight but married Jesus with children, it begs the question, just how do they think of Jesus.

Did Jesus have an anus? He ate and drank so clearly he had to expel waste. And so presumedly yes Virginia, your Lord and Saviour on occasion farted. He pooped and peed too. And if he peed he had a penis. Did he hold it when he urinated? Did he do the shake twice or just put it back?

These are the things we need to know.

Seriously? When you start a thread like this, your integrity is reduced to that of Bart Simpson. Try to converse on an adult level. Some may even read what you write.

 

[Delta4Embassy]

Obviously I could care less if he did. This is more about how Christians seem to have a problem with Jesus being a human being and how they seem to want him to be a Ken doll.

As to my integrity posting this thread google the thread's question. It's a legitmate theological question since if Jesus was human, he would have had human needs. To say he wasn't human is actually heretical, as is denying he did human things like expel waste or fart.

 

[Delta4Embassy]

Did Jesus ever farted

Did Jesus ever fart - Topix

Did Jesus Poop Scott Quinn

etc. It's been asked before.

 

[hobelim]

Did Jesus ever farted

Did Jesus ever fart - Topix

Did Jesus Poop Scott Quinn

etc. It's been asked before.

You just had to ask again? Because Christians have a problem??


LOL...

 

[CrusaderFrank]

The op is a fucking embarrassment to the human race.

 

[Delta4Embassy]

The op is a fucking embarrassment to the human race.

And you're such a great example of the faithful? I don't think so.

 

[CrusaderFrank]

The op is a fucking embarrassment to the human race.

And you're such a great example of the faithful? I don't think so.

Thankfully no one gives a fuck what you think

 

[Delta4Embassy]

The op is a fucking embarrassment to the human race.

And you're such a great example of the faithful? I don't think so.

Thankfully no one gives a fuck what you think

Other than those that respond at least. An easy to manipulate minimind says what?

 

[konradv]

Fully human and fully divine according to Nicene Christianity, so YES.

 

[September]

Jesus only expelled the most holiest of gaseous emissions, which smelled like Frankincense and created a faint rainbow behind him. When he would pass bowel movements, angels would come out and carry his divine excrement away into the Heavens. He would pray while urinating, and as a holy ritual, he would aim into a chalice, and when he was done, he would use his Miracle Mojo to convert the urine into wine, and offer it to the people in his life, such as his disciples.

Eventually Judas caught on.

​

 

[zaangalewa]

Seriously. Since Christians seem to have so much difficulty imagining a gay Jesus, or even a straight but married Jesus with children, it begs the question, just how do they think of Jesus.

Did Jesus have an anus? He ate and drank so clearly he had to expel waste. And so presumedly yes Virginia, your Lord and Saviour on occasion farted. He pooped and peed too. And if he peed he had a penis. Did he hold it when he urinated? Did he do the shake twice or just put it back?

These are the things we need to know.

What about if you would speak with your doctor about the things you need to know? What's your real problem? Why do you attack continously Jews and Christians?