Thoughts on Homeschooling?

[thereisnospoon]

I'm going to give a little more background, because I don't think the OP is thorough-enough.

Basically my father was a traditional Apostolic-Pentecostal who was very selfish and cared more about money than family.

He was too busy to do anything fatherly with his children. He was also an abusive man emotionally and verbally, and sometimes physically.

What he would do most of the time is stay upstairs in office and be on the internet, keeping a psychotically-focused eye on the stock market.

When the heavy box containing my schoolwork arrived, he'd give it to me and tell me to get it done, so he could grade it.

I never had a teacher. Him being a computer engineer, he'd help me on some math problems, but that was it.

Basically I was left to learn it on my own. Oh, and he wouldn't put money towards his family but the bare essentials.

He decided what you ate, when you went out, where you could go, and you could buy. Yeah, fun times. He was a control freak.

Rereading what I'm writing right now... I get that not all homeschooled kids go through a hell like this. I'm just feeling angry over ir.

So it's really not the homeschooling at all. You think you had a shitty father.
Thanks for clearing that up

 

[martybegan]

Home schooling is a great idea if you don't want your children to be more educated than you are. That being said, people should have the right to make that decision, no matter how much I disagree with it.

So all teachers are smarter than all of their students?

 

[Dan Daly]

So if you want to blame something for your personal trait or handicap, perhaps you should be blaming your father, rather than the practice of home schooling.

But blame and a buck might get you a cup of coffee...perhaps you should spend less time trying to place blame and more time moving forward and taking the responsibility for your own improvement and self-actualization.

 

[Roudy]

I'm looking to talk about this here before I take the discussion to FB with family, friends, and coworkers.

The more I think about homeschooling, the more it angers me.

Having actually been homeschooled, I know and understand it more than anyone against it who hasn't been homeschooled. The real problem isn't a matter of academic quality—my grades were superior to those students my age in the local public school.

No, the real problem is the lack of socialization public schooling gives you. I don't care if it means you get beaten up, or try weed, or have underage sex, or other things like that in public school—you need to be immersed among hundreds of other kids your age when you're young. That socialization is so damned important!

I do very well on the academic front, but homeschooling—especially when it's of a religious nature—can lead to isolation and introversion! Only as a young man in my later twenties, being immersed in a highly social and competitive field working in a hospital, do I now feel more and more social, and crave that constant human interaction and fear less the thought of sharing parts of my soul openly with others.

What I am right now is angry. Feeling it right now. I didn't get much of a choice being homeschooled. Being young, having ADHD, I got savagely bullied and beat. The limp-wristed school officials who were too scared to do anything about those fuckers did nothing! Didn't matter that they took wet, rolled up towels and used them to whip gashes into my skin for fun—this was when I was a kid in swim class. So my social well-being was sacrificed so I could be safe—because those school officials did NOTHING—and I did get better grades which became very useful when college came around.

Still, I am an introvert because of homeschooling. Being an introvert in and of itself is not bad—I know a lot of fairly fucking stupid extroverts. It's just that being around a lot of people your age when you're young is really important. They just need to get their act together to clean up the scum in the public school system.

I don't know what should be done about homeschooling. Those kids NEED to be socializing a lot. It's incredibly important. More than a few religious folk homeschool their kids, and some of those folk don't think too much about the vital need to socialize.

I want to know if there's anyone else here who came from a similar background to mine. I want you to tell me—from the bottom of you heart—how wrong or right you believe I am. I won't bite—I'll respect your opinion. Just, please, level with me here to help me understand this better and try to get over my emotions on this.

Totally agree. Being involved in athletics, it is common for kids to be homeschooled if they plan on getting serious about a sport. I run into it all the time. I find people who are homeschooled to be somewhat temperamental and socially handicapped as adults. Social interactions are a big part of surviving in today's society, and homeschooled individuals seem to be seriously handicapped. Sad part is most of them that don't end up accomplishing their athletic or other dreams, end up as "damaged goods" regretting having missed an important memorable part of their life experience as a result.

 

[Wake]

I'm looking to talk about this here before I take the discussion to FB with family, friends, and coworkers.

The more I think about homeschooling, the more it angers me.

Having actually been homeschooled, I know and understand it more than anyone against it who hasn't been homeschooled. The real problem isn't a matter of academic quality—my grades were superior to those students my age in the local public school.

No, the real problem is the lack of socialization public schooling gives you. I don't care if it means you get beaten up, or try weed, or have underage sex, or other things like that in public school—you need to be immersed among hundreds of other kids your age when you're young. That socialization is so damned important!

I do very well on the academic front, but homeschooling—especially when it's of a religious nature—can lead to isolation and introversion! Only as a young man in my later twenties, being immersed in a highly social and competitive field working in a hospital, do I now feel more and more social, and crave that constant human interaction and fear less the thought of sharing parts of my soul openly with others.

What I am right now is angry. Feeling it right now. I didn't get much of a choice being homeschooled. Being young, having ADHD, I got savagely bullied and beat. The limp-wristed school officials who were too scared to do anything about those fuckers did nothing! Didn't matter that they took wet, rolled up towels and used them to whip gashes into my skin for fun—this was when I was a kid in swim class. So my social well-being was sacrificed so I could be safe—because those school officials did NOTHING—and I did get better grades which became very useful when college came around.

Still, I am an introvert because of homeschooling. Being an introvert in and of itself is not bad—I know a lot of fairly fucking stupid extroverts. It's just that being around a lot of people your age when you're young is really important. They just need to get their act together to clean up the scum in the public school system.

I don't know what should be done about homeschooling. Those kids NEED to be socializing a lot. It's incredibly important. More than a few religious folk homeschool their kids, and some of those folk don't think too much about the vital need to socialize.

I want to know if there's anyone else here who came from a similar background to mine. I want you to tell me—from the bottom of you heart—how wrong or right you believe I am. I won't bite—I'll respect your opinion. Just, please, level with me here to help me understand this better and try to get over my emotions on this.

1) It looks like you are an introvert because you wish to be.

2) You said so yourself. You were getting the shit beaten out of you. So your parents after seeking the help of school administrators, gave up and home schooled you.

3) And now you're angry because you missed out on social interaction? Seems to me you were an abject failure at it.

4) Where I come from, very few kids were targeted for being picked on totally at random. And the weaker kids got their balls busted and such, but that is just part of growing up.

5) The kids, mainly boys, that got picked on daily most of them were pains in the ass who just did not want to take a hint that they were the problem.
I had this one type of kid in some of my freshman and sophomore classes. He was constantly getting stuff done to him...You name it. They did it. He even got on my nerves to the point ( he and I were about the same size) where I was going to basically pound his ass, if he didn't back off.
The point is whatever this idiot got, he deserved.

6) Your finding fault with home schooling is simplistic.

7) If you disagree with it, fine. Don't take that choice away from others.

1) Do you believe people become introverts because they want to be? I think it just happens, and I think a culminations of things happening, whether it's homeschooling and/or a bad father, can play a role in that.

2) ...did I? I was a young child. My parents made that choice. The school administration failed; it was only after lawsuits years later that that school eventually shut down. I haven't fully disclosed the extent of the bullying, but it was enough to be a very serious thing.

3) I think this is an ugly sentiment coming from you, and that you are above that. The first sentence has merit. Your second does not.

4) Having ADHD in my youth, I was a magnet for bullying. It does not excuse bullying.

5) ...do you think the majority of those kids being bullied deserved it? If you come from the mindset that the victims being bullied deserve to be bullied, we're at a crossroads.

6) You speak of simplicity, yet you assume those being bullied deserved it, and you think introversion was a choice in my youth, as a child not even ten years old. It's not a simple issue. I used to champion homeschooling. I have a far better of it than you do, having been through it.

7) I'm only here to give voice to my thoughts and emotions and experiences on homeschooling. If I want something to be done about it, I haven't committed to it yet.

 

[NightFox]

No, the real problem is the lack of socialization public schooling gives you. .

Homeschooling and socialization are not mutually exclusive nor are public schools the sole avenue where healthy socialization for children can occur, what you are doing is attempting to hold up your own experience as emblematic of the whole (which it is not, it's simply your own experience).

I would suggest instead of engaging in any talk of "banning" homeschooling (a clear violation of individual rights) you instead focus on ways that might improve outcomes for homeschooling, such as ways that home schooled children can receive an appropriate amount of socialization (which I know for a fact can be done, since I know several people that were homeschooled and had no such socialization issues).

 

[Wake]

moving forward and taking the responsibility for your own improvement and self-actualization.

Nursing school in the spring. One of the best CNAs at our hospital. I've come out of my shell so much. Even gone dancing and out for dinner with my coworkers more than a few times. Been going to the gym, and have lost over 30 lbs in two months. Working hard to establish vital relationships with people, even if it means pushing out of my comfort zone to get to know people. Nurturing that side of me that cares for the sick, disabled, and dependent. Becoming a wound care nurse in the future. Stellar grades. Professor says it's not a matter of 'if,' but 'when' I reach my goals due to my diligence, study prowess, and silent determination. Starting this November I'll be donating at least 20 hours a week feeding the homeless and beautifying our counties. Dinner with the mayor, board of directors, and staff at our hospital come next January.

There is a lot I have not shared here. It is probably because those under the veil of anonymity feel safer in saying cruel things.

 

[Wake]

No, the real problem is the lack of socialization public schooling gives you. .

Homeschooling and socialization are not mutually exclusive nor are public schools the sole avenue where healthy socialization for children can occur, what you are doing is attempting to hold up your own experience as emblematic of the whole (which it is not, it's simply your own experience).

I would suggest instead of engaging in any talk of "banning" homeschooling (a clear violation of individual rights) you instead focus on ways that might improve outcomes for homeschooling, such as ways that home schooled children can receive an appropriate amount of socialization (which I know for a fact can be done, since I know several people that were homeschooled and had no such socialization issues).

I don't actually want to ban homeschooling.

I just want a discussion about its good and bad aspects, which is what is happening right now.

 

[koshergrl]

Homeschooling has really come a long, long ways in the last 25 years. I wish I could swing it financially and in regards to time...I HATE the majority of public schools. I hate the atmosphere, I hate the attitude, I hate what they teach. Good lord, my daughter had Language Arts last year and I was so excited, I LOVED Language Arts when I was young...do you know what "language arts" was for her? They studied the BRAIN and how it processes information.

?

Wtf?

An old friend of mine is homeschooling her daughters this year. The girls went to science camp, they are involved in sports, and they do other highly social things. The more I see what public school has to offer, the less I value it, and the more I value the FAMILY as the way to educate our youngsters.

 

[Katzndogz]

I'm looking to talk about this here before I take the discussion to FB with family, friends, and coworkers.

The more I think about homeschooling, the more it angers me.

Having actually been homeschooled, I know and understand it more than anyone against it who hasn't been homeschooled. The real problem isn't a matter of academic quality—my grades were superior to those students my age in the local public school.

No, the real problem is the lack of socialization public schooling gives you. I don't care if it means you get beaten up, or try weed, or have underage sex, or other things like that in public school—you need to be immersed among hundreds of other kids your age when you're young. That socialization is so damned important!

I do very well on the academic front, but homeschooling—especially when it's of a religious nature—can lead to isolation and introversion! Only as a young man in my later twenties, being immersed in a highly social and competitive field working in a hospital, do I now feel more and more social, and crave that constant human interaction and fear less the thought of sharing parts of my soul openly with others.

What I am right now is angry. Feeling it right now. I didn't get much of a choice being homeschooled. Being young, having ADHD, I got savagely bullied and beat. The limp-wristed school officials who were too scared to do anything about those fuckers did nothing! Didn't matter that they took wet, rolled up towels and used them to whip gashes into my skin for fun—this was when I was a kid in swim class. So my social well-being was sacrificed so I could be safe—because those school officials did NOTHING—and I did get better grades which became very useful when college came around.

Still, I am an introvert because of homeschooling. Being an introvert in and of itself is not bad—I know a lot of fairly fucking stupid extroverts. It's just that being around a lot of people your age when you're young is really important. They just need to get their act together to clean up the scum in the public school system.

I don't know what should be done about homeschooling. Those kids NEED to be socializing a lot. It's incredibly important. More than a few religious folk homeschool their kids, and some of those folk don't think too much about the vital need to socialize.

I want to know if there's anyone else here who came from a similar background to mine. I want you to tell me—from the bottom of you heart—how wrong or right you believe I am. I won't bite—I'll respect your opinion. Just, please, level with me here to help me understand this better and try to get over my emotions on this.

1) It looks like you are an introvert because you wish to be.

2) You said so yourself. You were getting the shit beaten out of you. So your parents after seeking the help of school administrators, gave up and home schooled you.

3) And now you're angry because you missed out on social interaction? Seems to me you were an abject failure at it.

4) Where I come from, very few kids were targeted for being picked on totally at random. And the weaker kids got their balls busted and such, but that is just part of growing up.

5) The kids, mainly boys, that got picked on daily most of them were pains in the ass who just did not want to take a hint that they were the problem.
I had this one type of kid in some of my freshman and sophomore classes. He was constantly getting stuff done to him...You name it. They did it. He even got on my nerves to the point ( he and I were about the same size) where I was going to basically pound his ass, if he didn't back off.
The point is whatever this idiot got, he deserved.

6) Your finding fault with home schooling is simplistic.

7) If you disagree with it, fine. Don't take that choice away from others.

1) Do you believe people become introverts because they want to be? I think it just happens, and I think a culminations of things happening, whether it's homeschooling and/or a bad father, can play a role in that.

2) ...did I? I was a young child. My parents made that choice. The school administration failed; it was only after lawsuits years later that that school eventually shut down. I haven't fully disclosed the extent of the bullying, but it was enough to be a very serious thing.

3) I think this is an ugly sentiment coming from you, and that you are above that. The first sentence has merit. Your second does not.

4) Having ADHD in my youth, I was a magnet for bullying. It does not excuse bullying.

5) ...do you think the majority of those kids being bullied deserved it? If you come from the mindset that the victims being bullied deserve to be bullied, we're at a crossroads.

6) You speak of simplicity, yet you assume those being bullied deserved it, and you think introversion was a choice in my youth, as a child not even ten years old. It's not a simple issue. I used to champion homeschooling. I have a far better of it than you do, having been through it.

7) I'm only here to give voice to my thoughts and emotions and experiences on homeschooling. If I want something to be done about it, I haven't committed to it yet.

All you have done is tell us why homeschooling was so necessary for you. Homeschooling didn't cause you to be an introvert. Being an introvert caused your home schooling. You want to blame being homeschooled for the failure of everyone else to fully appreciate you and treat you like the little cupcake you are..

I was home schooled. I was able to advance at a more rapid rate then my slow peer counterparts so I appreciated it. But, homeschooling was necessary for more than that. It was the only way to separate me from others my age and reduce the violent outbursts. Socialization isn't for everyone. It might not be for you. In your mind, you didn't need socialization, everyone else needed socialization to stop bullying you. I doubt that you see socialization as a way for you to change sufficiently to not be a victim of bullying. That means taking charge of your own well being. Can't have that. Blame being an introvert. Blame ADHD, or find something else.

You were properly home schooled. I was properly home schooled. My school, or schools because I went to many tried everything. I was in endless team sports where I concentrated on making sure my team lost. I was shuffled off to all manner of social activities where I beat up everyone that thought they might talk to me. Socialization failed. Homeschooling was the only option. It looks like it was the only option for you too.

 

[Katzndogz]

Homeschooling has really come a long, long ways in the last 25 years. I wish I could swing it financially and in regards to time...I HATE the majority of public schools. I hate the atmosphere, I hate the attitude, I hate what they teach. Good lord, my daughter had Language Arts last year and I was so excited, I LOVED Language Arts when I was young...do you know what "language arts" was for her? They studied the BRAIN and how it processes information.

?

Wtf?

An old friend of mine is homeschooling her daughters this year. The girls went to science camp, they are involved in sports, and they do other highly social things. The more I see what public school has to offer, the less I value it, and the more I value the FAMILY as the way to educate our youngsters.

The fear is, the objection to homeschooling really is, that the family might instill religion into the child. That's what the big objection is.

 

[jillian]

My wife was home schooled. As her parents were jehovahs witnesses. She hated it and wouldn't wish it on anybody.
But I wouldn't want to ban it. People should have choice.

home schooling exists for people who want to raise their children in a bubble.

we regulate things regarding the education of children all of the time. I think you should have a real (read: non-discriminatory) reason for homeschooling and it should only be done where the child is being bullied at school or there is some other justifiable reason.

 

[koshergrl]

Homeschooling has really come a long, long ways in the last 25 years. I wish I could swing it financially and in regards to time...I HATE the majority of public schools. I hate the atmosphere, I hate the attitude, I hate what they teach. Good lord, my daughter had Language Arts last year and I was so excited, I LOVED Language Arts when I was young...do you know what "language arts" was for her? They studied the BRAIN and how it processes information.

?

Wtf?

An old friend of mine is homeschooling her daughters this year. The girls went to science camp, they are involved in sports, and they do other highly social things. The more I see what public school has to offer, the less I value it, and the more I value the FAMILY as the way to educate our youngsters.

The fear is, the objection to homeschooling really is, that the family might instill religion into the child. That's what the big objection is.

And regular, blue collar, Christian morality and values. You know...honesty, integrity, love of God, family, country, and a desire to work hard and do the right thing.

 

[TNHarley]

My wife was home schooled. As her parents were jehovahs witnesses. She hated it and wouldn't wish it on anybody.
But I wouldn't want to ban it. People should have choice.

home schooling exists for people who want to raise their children in a bubble.

we regulate things regarding the education of children all of the time. I think you should have a real (read: non-discriminatory) reason for homeschooling and it should only be done where the child is being bullied at school or there is some other justifiable reason.

I know right? A personal opinion or desire means shit...
People have the right to be an idiot, Jillian.

 

[koshergrl]

My wife was home schooled. As her parents were jehovahs witnesses. She hated it and wouldn't wish it on anybody.
But I wouldn't want to ban it. People should have choice.

home schooling exists for people who want to raise their children in a bubble.

we regulate things regarding the education of children all of the time. I think you should have a real (read: non-discriminatory) reason for homeschooling and it should only be done where the child is being bullied at school or there is some other justifiable reason.

Oh bullshit. The person in the bubble is you. You're completely out of touch with people who don't have multiple schooling choices within walking distance. The rest of us live in areas where we have a single choice for schooling...and if we are not comfortable with that choice, for whatever reason, we have the right to school our own kids.

Americans have TRADITIONALLY schooled their own children, away from settlements and big cities. Today's schools are no more than indoctrination camps for kids, and more and more people are not going to subject their kids to them.

Florida family angry after daughter sent home from school in underwear

Video: San Francisco middle school refuses to tell winners of election, students say principal believes winners are not diverse enough

List of school shootings in the United States - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

 

[jillian]

My wife was home schooled. As her parents were jehovahs witnesses. She hated it and wouldn't wish it on anybody.
But I wouldn't want to ban it. People should have choice.

home schooling exists for people who want to raise their children in a bubble.

we regulate things regarding the education of children all of the time. I think you should have a real (read: non-discriminatory) reason for homeschooling and it should only be done where the child is being bullied at school or there is some other justifiable reason.

I know right? A personal opinion or desire means shit...
People have the right to be an idiot, Jillian.

yes... when they're adults and make their own choices.

they don't get to do so with children.... which is why there are laws concerning educational (and other) neglect and requirements that children attend school (or the parents are subject to prosecution for neglect). I just think there should be extraordinary reasons to isolate a child like that.

 

[jillian]

My wife was home schooled. As her parents were jehovahs witnesses. She hated it and wouldn't wish it on anybody.
But I wouldn't want to ban it. People should have choice.

home schooling exists for people who want to raise their children in a bubble.

we regulate things regarding the education of children all of the time. I think you should have a real (read: non-discriminatory) reason for homeschooling and it should only be done where the child is being bullied at school or there is some other justifiable reason.

Oh bullshit. The person in the bubble is you. You're completely out of touch with people who don't have multiple schooling choices within walking distance. The rest of us live in areas where we have a single choice for schooling...and if we are not comfortable with that choice, for whatever reason, we have the right to school our own kids.

Americans have TRADITIONALLY schooled their own children, away from settlements and big cities. Today's schools are no more than indoctrination camps for kids, and more and more people are not going to subject their kids to them.

Florida family angry after daughter sent home from school in underwear

Video: San Francisco middle school refuses to tell winners of election, students say principal believes winners are not diverse enough

shhhhhh....

 

[TNHarley]

My wife was home schooled. As her parents were jehovahs witnesses. She hated it and wouldn't wish it on anybody.
But I wouldn't want to ban it. People should have choice.

home schooling exists for people who want to raise their children in a bubble.

we regulate things regarding the education of children all of the time. I think you should have a real (read: non-discriminatory) reason for homeschooling and it should only be done where the child is being bullied at school or there is some other justifiable reason.

I know right? A personal opinion or desire means shit...
People have the right to be an idiot, Jillian.

yes... when they're adults and make their own choices.

they don't get to do so with children.... which is why there are laws concerning educational (and other) neglect and requirements that children attend school (or the parents are subject to prosecution for neglect). I just think there should be extraordinary reasons to isolate a child like that.

Parents shouldn't decide how to raise their kids?
Yea, the government knows whats best!

 

[jillian]

My wife was home schooled. As her parents were jehovahs witnesses. She hated it and wouldn't wish it on anybody.
But I wouldn't want to ban it. People should have choice.

home schooling exists for people who want to raise their children in a bubble.

we regulate things regarding the education of children all of the time. I think you should have a real (read: non-discriminatory) reason for homeschooling and it should only be done where the child is being bullied at school or there is some other justifiable reason.

I know right? A personal opinion or desire means shit...
People have the right to be an idiot, Jillian.

yes... when they're adults and make their own choices.

they don't get to do so with children.... which is why there are laws concerning educational (and other) neglect and requirements that children attend school (or the parents are subject to prosecution for neglect). I just think there should be extraordinary reasons to isolate a child like that.

Parents shouldn't decide how to raise their kids?
Yea, the government knows whats best!

parents don't get to decide that their kids shouldn't go to school. again, that's why there are laws requiring education.

 

[NightFox]

No, the real problem is the lack of socialization public schooling gives you. .

Homeschooling and socialization are not mutually exclusive nor are public schools the sole avenue where healthy socialization for children can occur, what you are doing is attempting to hold up your own experience as emblematic of the whole (which it is not, it's simply your own experience).

I would suggest instead of engaging in any talk of "banning" homeschooling (a clear violation of individual rights) you instead focus on ways that might improve outcomes for homeschooling, such as ways that home schooled children can receive an appropriate amount of socialization (which I know for a fact can be done, since I know several people that were homeschooled and had no such socialization issues).

I don't actually want to ban homeschooling.

I just want a discussion about its good and bad aspects, which is what is happening right now.

That's good to hear, although I must say your thread title is a bit misleading.