Thoughts on Homeschooling?

[Wake]

If my father weren't a controlling bastard and cared about his wife and children and my social well-being then things would have been better.

I can see that that is not homeschooling's fault. People can use homeschooling the wrong way. They can. But it's not the majority.

Thank you for reminding me of this.

I haven't spoken to my father since 2010 since my mother and us kids fled the state because he was getting to the point of wanting to kill us. I could share with you a post I shared on Facebook about this, just to give more of a glimpse of what was actually going on.

Introversion never caused my homeschooling. Being beaten up and physically abused day by day forced my parents to homeschool me, and no that does not make me a 'cupcake,' to whichever bastard who said that. Try having your finger broken, your head hit with a bat, you skin ripped off by wet towels, and being kicked by five kids bigger than you who don't like the fact you're in their class and two years younger than them. Yeah, a 'cupcake.'

Homeschooling in itself didn't cause my introversion, either. It was my father who kept me [us] isolated. It was him. If my father behaved like a father then my homeschooling experience would have been so much better. It was because of him and his emotional abuse that I was left apologizing for everything, even for things that were not even my fault. He, not homeschooling, caused my introversion, because he beat me down emotionally, verbally, and sometimes physically. It was him, not homeschooling.

 

[Wake]

No, the real problem is the lack of socialization public schooling gives you. .

Homeschooling and socialization are not mutually exclusive nor are public schools the sole avenue where healthy socialization for children can occur, what you are doing is attempting to hold up your own experience as emblematic of the whole (which it is not, it's simply your own experience).

I would suggest instead of engaging in any talk of "banning" homeschooling (a clear violation of individual rights) you instead focus on ways that might improve outcomes for homeschooling, such as ways that home schooled children can receive an appropriate amount of socialization (which I know for a fact can be done, since I know several people that were homeschooled and had no such socialization issues).

I don't actually want to ban homeschooling.

I just want a discussion about its good and bad aspects, which is what is happening right now.

That's good to hear, although I must say your thread title is a bit misleading.

I asked a member of staff to change it to 'Thoughts on Homeschooling?'

At the time I posted the title I was just feeling angry.

 

[TNHarley]

My wife was home schooled. As her parents were jehovahs witnesses. She hated it and wouldn't wish it on anybody.
But I wouldn't want to ban it. People should have choice.

home schooling exists for people who want to raise their children in a bubble.

we regulate things regarding the education of children all of the time. I think you should have a real (read: non-discriminatory) reason for homeschooling and it should only be done where the child is being bullied at school or there is some other justifiable reason.

I know right? A personal opinion or desire means shit...
People have the right to be an idiot, Jillian.

yes... when they're adults and make their own choices.

they don't get to do so with children.... which is why there are laws concerning educational (and other) neglect and requirements that children attend school (or the parents are subject to prosecution for neglect). I just think there should be extraordinary reasons to isolate a child like that.

Parents shouldn't decide how to raise their kids?
Yea, the government knows whats best!

parents don't get to decide that their kids shouldn't go to school. again, that's why there are laws requiring education.

Like home schooling? lol

 

[thereisnospoon]

I'm looking to talk about this here before I take the discussion to FB with family, friends, and coworkers.

The more I think about homeschooling, the more it angers me.

Having actually been homeschooled, I know and understand it more than anyone against it who hasn't been homeschooled. The real problem isn't a matter of academic quality—my grades were superior to those students my age in the local public school.

No, the real problem is the lack of socialization public schooling gives you. I don't care if it means you get beaten up, or try weed, or have underage sex, or other things like that in public school—you need to be immersed among hundreds of other kids your age when you're young. That socialization is so damned important!

I do very well on the academic front, but homeschooling—especially when it's of a religious nature—can lead to isolation and introversion! Only as a young man in my later twenties, being immersed in a highly social and competitive field working in a hospital, do I now feel more and more social, and crave that constant human interaction and fear less the thought of sharing parts of my soul openly with others.

What I am right now is angry. Feeling it right now. I didn't get much of a choice being homeschooled. Being young, having ADHD, I got savagely bullied and beat. The limp-wristed school officials who were too scared to do anything about those fuckers did nothing! Didn't matter that they took wet, rolled up towels and used them to whip gashes into my skin for fun—this was when I was a kid in swim class. So my social well-being was sacrificed so I could be safe—because those school officials did NOTHING—and I did get better grades which became very useful when college came around.

Still, I am an introvert because of homeschooling. Being an introvert in and of itself is not bad—I know a lot of fairly fucking stupid extroverts. It's just that being around a lot of people your age when you're young is really important. They just need to get their act together to clean up the scum in the public school system.

I don't know what should be done about homeschooling. Those kids NEED to be socializing a lot. It's incredibly important. More than a few religious folk homeschool their kids, and some of those folk don't think too much about the vital need to socialize.

I want to know if there's anyone else here who came from a similar background to mine. I want you to tell me—from the bottom of you heart—how wrong or right you believe I am. I won't bite—I'll respect your opinion. Just, please, level with me here to help me understand this better and try to get over my emotions on this.

1) It looks like you are an introvert because you wish to be.

2) You said so yourself. You were getting the shit beaten out of you. So your parents after seeking the help of school administrators, gave up and home schooled you.

3) And now you're angry because you missed out on social interaction? Seems to me you were an abject failure at it.

4) Where I come from, very few kids were targeted for being picked on totally at random. And the weaker kids got their balls busted and such, but that is just part of growing up.

5) The kids, mainly boys, that got picked on daily most of them were pains in the ass who just did not want to take a hint that they were the problem.
I had this one type of kid in some of my freshman and sophomore classes. He was constantly getting stuff done to him...You name it. They did it. He even got on my nerves to the point ( he and I were about the same size) where I was going to basically pound his ass, if he didn't back off.
The point is whatever this idiot got, he deserved.

6) Your finding fault with home schooling is simplistic.

7) If you disagree with it, fine. Don't take that choice away from others.

1) Do you believe people become introverts because they want to be? I think it just happens, and I think a culminations of things happening, whether it's homeschooling and/or a bad father, can play a role in that.

2) ...did I? I was a young child. My parents made that choice. The school administration failed; it was only after lawsuits years later that that school eventually shut down. I haven't fully disclosed the extent of the bullying, but it was enough to be a very serious thing.

3) I think this is an ugly sentiment coming from you, and that you are above that. The first sentence has merit. Your second does not.

4) Having ADHD in my youth, I was a magnet for bullying. It does not excuse bullying.

5) ...do you think the majority of those kids being bullied deserved it? If you come from the mindset that the victims being bullied deserve to be bullied, we're at a crossroads.

6) You speak of simplicity, yet you assume those being bullied deserved it, and you think introversion was a choice in my youth, as a child not even ten years old. It's not a simple issue. I used to champion homeschooling. I have a far better of it than you do, having been through it.

7) I'm only here to give voice to my thoughts and emotions and experiences on homeschooling. If I want something to be done about it, I haven't committed to it yet.

to answer your first question..Yes I think people make choices all the time.
lawsuits shut down a public school? Come on..anyway..Immaterial..
So you were flaming success at social interaction?
Look, half the male student body of any public school was diagnosed with some kind of attention disorder.....It got out of control. No one gets picked on just for breathing the air.
I've been there. Seen it. Got picked on myself. No big deal.. I learned that it was not me that was the problem, they were the losers. I learned to stay away from trouble.
I think this entire bullying thing has been blown out proportion. Its like every time a kid gets the slightest little balls busting their parents are running to the media and hiring an attorney.
Yeah, kids get picked on by other kids. It happens.
I will say though that when the kid stuff goes beyond a certain level, it's time to intervene. And if the school administration refuses( mostly because educrats are the type of people who just try to wish things away), escalate the situation..Absolutely.
Quite honestly, I do not believe your issues are tied to home schooling at all. JMHO...We're through here.

 

[jillian]

home schooling exists for people who want to raise their children in a bubble.

we regulate things regarding the education of children all of the time. I think you should have a real (read: non-discriminatory) reason for homeschooling and it should only be done where the child is being bullied at school or there is some other justifiable reason.

I know right? A personal opinion or desire means shit...
People have the right to be an idiot, Jillian.

yes... when they're adults and make their own choices.

they don't get to do so with children.... which is why there are laws concerning educational (and other) neglect and requirements that children attend school (or the parents are subject to prosecution for neglect). I just think there should be extraordinary reasons to isolate a child like that.

Parents shouldn't decide how to raise their kids?
Yea, the government knows whats best!

parents don't get to decide that their kids shouldn't go to school. again, that's why there are laws requiring education.

Like home schooling? lol

there aren't laws against home-schooling. we're discussing whether there should be.

 

[Dan Daly]

moving forward and taking the responsibility for your own improvement and self-actualization.

Nursing school in the spring. One of the best CNAs at our hospital. I've come out of my shell so much. Even gone dancing and out for dinner with my coworkers more than a few times. Been going to the gym, and have lost over 30 lbs in two months. Working hard to establish vital relationships with people, even if it means pushing out of my comfort zone to get to know people. Nurturing that side of me that cares for the sick, disabled, and dependent. Becoming a wound care nurse in the future. Stellar grades. Professor says it's not a matter of 'if,' but 'when' I reach my goals due to my diligence, study prowess, and silent determination. Starting this November I'll be donating at least 20 hours a week feeding the homeless and beautifying our counties. Dinner with the mayor, board of directors, and staff at our hospital come next January.

There is a lot I have not shared here. It is probably because those under the veil of anonymity feel safer in saying cruel things.

Sorry if I hurt your feelings, cupcake, but as a nurse you should already know that sometimes it is best to just remove the dirty bandage with one good pull, rather than to pussyfoot around with it little by little.

Having served in elected office, forgive me if your attempts at self-promoting bulltwinkle by association doesn't impress me.

 

[Katzndogz]

If my father weren't a controlling bastard and cared about his wife and children and my social well-being then things would have been better.

I can see that that is not homeschooling's fault. People can use homeschooling the wrong way. They can. But it's not the majority.

Thank you for reminding me of this.

I haven't spoken to my father since 2010 since my mother and us kids fled the state because he was getting to the point of wanting to kill us. I could share with you a post I shared on Facebook about this, just to give more of a glimpse of what was actually going on.

Introversion never caused my homeschooling. Being beaten up and physically abused day by day forced my parents to homeschool me, and no that does not make me a 'cupcake,' to whichever bastard who said that. Try having your finger broken, your head hit with a bat, you skin ripped off by wet towels, and being kicked by five kids bigger than you who don't like the fact you're in their class and two years younger than them. Yeah, a 'cupcake.'

Homeschooling in itself didn't cause my introversion, either. It was my father who kept me [us] isolated. It was him. If my father behaved like a father then my homeschooling experience would have been so much better. It was because of him and his emotional abuse that I was left apologizing for everything, even for things that were not even my fault. He, not homeschooling, caused my introversion, because he beat me down emotionally, verbally, and sometimes physically. It was him, not homeschooling.

You were a cupcake or you would have been the one breaking fingers and cracking heads instead of whining about it. Yeah, even if they were bigger than you.

 

[boilermaker55]

Maybe from your own learning. You are the failure.

We should ban public schooling.. that seems to be the biggest failure.

 

[bodecea]

We should ban public schooling.. that seems to be the biggest failure.

Ok...so, what happens then?

 

[bendog]

Unless the parents are keeping the kid out of school in order to focus on some athletic training that may bring in big bucks, HS parents are Nuts and masochists. (-:

 

[koshergrl]

Maybe from your own learning. You are the failure.

We should ban public schooling.. that seems to be the biggest failure.

No, the failure is with the schools.

 

[koshergrl]

Unless the parents are keeping the kid out of school in order to focus on some athletic training that may bring in big bucks, HS parents are Nuts and masochists. (-:

You loons are the nuts and masochists..aka "statists".

 

[Wake]

Unless the parents are keeping the kid out of school in order to focus on some athletic training that may bring in big bucks, HS parents are Nuts and masochists. (-:

I don't think that's reasonable.

Homeschooling is homeschooling. If you do it right, good. Some of the parents who homeschool their children are nuts. Some. Not all.

IF I homeschool my children, I need to have my little ones out and about circulating in the community and socializing. Preferably around children their own age, but it's not a bad thing to be volunteering at nursing homes, homeless shelters, and other wholesome things.

Though I was homeschooled I never did drugs, had underaged sex, or did other stupid things typically seen in the public school setting. Academic standards were much higher than those in the public school setting, too. It takes one or more parents dedicated to making sure their homeschooled child succeeds. I can see now that my case has more to do with a bad father, rather than homeschooling in and of itself. If you homeschool your children you need to have them socialize, and have them socialize a lot. Having been there, if my future wife agrees with homeschooling our little ones I'm hellbound on having them socialize as much if not more than what is found in the public school system.

 

[IsaacNewton]

I would guess that the line to see a doctor that has been home-schooled is pretty short.

Teaching children how to add and subtract is easy, teaching them calculus and organic chemistry is another story. Home-schooling is only viable to the level of the parent's education which is never up to the level of trained teachers when you get to higher grades.

This is in addition to the OP's observation that socialization is atrophied when you don't go to school where you have to interact with and get along with hundreds or thousands of other people.

Nothing wrong with teaching kids at home, up to a point. And nothing stopping parents from doing so even when their kids are in public school. The more attentive parents do just that.

One of the best socializing activities a child can participate in is in band, choir, or some type of music class/ensemble. Music has a way of cutting through the barriers between people.

 

[koshergrl]

I would guess that the line to see a doctor that has been home-schooled is pretty short.

Teaching children how to add and subtract is easy, teaching them calculus and organic chemistry is another story. Home-schooling is only viable to the level of the parent's education which is never up to the level of trained teachers when you get to higher grades.

This is in addition to the OP's observation that socialization is atrophied when you don't go to school where you have to interact with and get along with hundreds or thousands of other people.

Nothing wrong with teaching kids at home, up to a point. And nothing stopping parents from doing so even when their kids are in public school. The more attentive parents do just that.

One of the best socializing activities a child can participate in is in band, choir, or some type of music class/ensemble. Music has a way of cutting through the barriers between people.

And music is available to children outside of school as well as in it.

 

[koshergrl]

Besides which, most homeschooled children have the option of participating in things like band, sports or whatever within their school districts, if they choose to do so.

 

[bendog]

Unless the parents are keeping the kid out of school in order to focus on some athletic training that may bring in big bucks, HS parents are Nuts and masochists. (-:

I don't think that's reasonable.

Homeschooling is homeschooling. If you do it right, good. Some of the parents who homeschool their children are nuts. Some. Not all.

IF I homeschool my children, I need to have my little ones out and about circulating in the community and socializing. Preferably around children their own age, but it's not a bad thing to be volunteering at nursing homes, homeless shelters, and other wholesome things.

Though I was homeschooled I never did drugs, had underaged sex, or did other stupid things typically seen in the public school setting. Academic standards were much higher than those in the public school setting, too. It takes one or more parents dedicated to making sure their homeschooled child succeeds. I can see now that my case has more to do with a bad father, rather than homeschooling in and of itself. If you homeschool your children you need to have them socialize, and have them socialize a lot. Having been there, if my future wife agrees with homeschooling our little ones I'm hellbound on having them socialize as much if not more than what is found in the public school system.

I think you have to be nuts to want to be around them all day. Now if your kid has an opportunity and aptitude to be ..... serena Williams, be all she can be. But, people have a right to be nuts.

 

[NYcarbineer]

For all the RWnuts around here who think they can prove a point with one example (yes I'm looking at you PolitcalChic)

Adam Lanza was homeschooled.

 

[koshergrl]

For all the RWnuts around here who think they can prove a point with one example (yes I'm looking at you PolitcalChic)

Adam Lanza was homeschooled.

He should have been in the nuthatch. He was homeschooled because he was insane, not insane because he was homeschooled.

 

[Wake]

I think homeschooling and public schooling both have their pros and their cons.

To use one murderer that was homeschooled is stupid, like using one murderer that was publicschooled. Especially when you consider that more people in America are publicschooled than homeschooled.

I would love to be around our little ones. But I don't want them to think they can be around the house all day. No, I'm gonna have you go out and volunteer, too, whether it's being out with many kids your age or helping the elderly person across the street. Also, it'll keep their devious little minds and hands busy... preoccupied.