DrLove
Diamond Member
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WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)âMike Pence said that he was âextremely gratefulâ that the organizers of Wednesday nightâs Vice-Presidential debate would be providing a plexiglass shield to protect him from a woman.
Speaking to reporters, Pence said that the Commission on Presidential Debates had taken âappropriate measuresâ to shield him from exposure to a female during the Salt Lake City face-off.
âIâve read all the relevant literature, and from what Iâve learned a plexiglass shield provides adequate protection from a woman,â he said. âKnowing that this barrier exists between me and a member of the opposite sex, I feel comfortable about moving forward with the debate.â
The Vice-President added that, if he makes it through Wednesdayâs debate without being exposed to a woman, he may start bringing a portable plexiglass shield with him on the campaign trail.
âDespite all of my precautions, in my travels across this great land of ours I have unfortunately encountered women,â Pence said. âPlexiglass might be the answer.â
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Pence Grateful That Plexiglass Shield at Debate Will Protect Him from Woman
Speaking to reporters, Pence said that the Commission on Presidential Debates had taken âappropriate measuresâ to shield him from exposure to a female.