Do you grasp the difference between a ceremony and a reception? I'll stretch it and say that sitting in the pews is participating in the ceremony. But the reception? Not a chance. I also catered a lot of corporate functions. And really other than a couple is dressed very differently, I couldn't tell the difference. People eating, getting drunk, making speeches.That's you. Others do. Then there are musicians who absolutely would be participating. My friend was a paid organist in the Methodist church, even though she was Catholic. She got out before the nuts there asked her to play for a gay wedding, because she would have certainly refused. then been subject to prosecution.