Living Together vs. Marriage

[mdk]

We lived together for 11 years before we got hitched. It would have been way earlier if circumstances permitted but it every couple should live together before they marry.

Did you marry for the commitment, the advantages (tax etc.) or all of the mentioned (and more...)?
Any plans for kids or do you already have any?

It was partially for the commitment and partially for the advantages. We covered all of our bases legally beforehand but power of attorneys and wills can be contested in court. The only way to ensure that our families couldn't meddle in our affairs if something dreadful happened was to marry. I am not saying they would but fighting over estates has turned many families upside. Gosh, that sounds super cynical. lol

Despite being the last male of the family line, we are never going to have children. I have scores of nieces and nephews I get to spoil rotten and send them home afterwards.

 

[saveliberty]

Marriage should be about taking care of the other person and placing them first. If you both do that, few problems will come your way.

 

[Bonzi]

We lived together for 11 years before we got hitched. It would have been way earlier if circumstances permitted but it every couple should live together before they marry.

Did you marry for the commitment, the advantages (tax etc.) or all of the mentioned (and more...)?
Any plans for kids or do you already have any?

It was partially for the commitment and partially for the advantages. We covered all of our bases legally beforehand but power of attorneys and wills can be contested in court. The only way to ensure that our families couldn't meddle in our affairs if something dreadful happened was to marry. I am not saying they would but fighting over estates has turned my families upside. Gosh, that sounds super cynical. lol

Despite being the last male of the family line, we are never going to have children. I have scores of nieces and nephews I get to spoil rotten and send them home afterwards.

It's not cynical. It DOES seem to bring out the worst in people.
I'm mentally preparing myself to just let my brother and sister have everything and whatever they agree to give me is fine because I want to keep on loving them. I just hope not to have to worry about that for a while...

 

[Bonzi]

Marriage should be about taking care of the other person and placing them first. If you both do that, few problems will come your way.

We're both completely selfish - it's been an interesting ride!

 

[Unkotare]

i have a lot of issues with them living together...he moves 10 minutes from work to about 45 minutes from work...doesnt seem to bother him however....he gave up his place to move in with her at her place.....giving her the upper hand...he said someone always has the upper hand....did i mention playing whip noises at him....not when she is with him but when he alone....she is bossy and controlling that is my job

............

 

[Defiant1]

Nothing says "I really and truly love you, BUT" like "let's just live together."

 

[saveliberty]

Marriage should be about taking care of the other person and placing them first. If you both do that, few problems will come your way.

We're both completely selfish - it's been an interesting ride!

That usually ends one way.

 

[Delta4Embassy]

What are your thoughts?

Do you think it's best to live with someone before getting married?
Aside from religious reasons, can you see any reason to NOT live with someone before marriage?

Common practice in some cultures to live togetehr at least a year first. See each other during all the stressful holidays and whatnot. How anal people are about cleaning. How they react when you eat their slice of pizza from the fridge.

Marriage is easy enough to do, but considerably more involved to undo. Not called wed-lock for nothing. And in a consumer society like the US, people are more inclined to abandon a failing relationship than work to fix it. This makes the permanance of marriage less likely to work longterm. And if you're not going in where counselling when a problem gets serious is your solution, but divorce is, there's little point to ever get married.

Think the idea from the "Earth 2" series has a lot of emrit: marriage contracts for a fixed length of time with option to renew. Get married for 5 years, if things are still amicable after 5 years can renew for another 5.

When your entire society is built around leases, a lifelong commitment as with marriage just isn't consistent. We lease homes, cars, computers, pretty much everything. Spouses too seem to be on a lease nowadays.

 

[Bonzi]

Nothing says "I really and truly love you, BUT" like "let's just live together."

or, I'll let you have one of my drawers.....

 

[rightwinger]

What are your thoughts?

Do you think it's best to live with someone before getting married?
Aside from religious reasons, can you see any reason to NOT live with someone before marriage?

I think you need to sleep with your prospective wife so you can be sure you are sexually compatible.....you also need to sleep with her mother so that you know what sex will be like in twenty years

 

[Bonzi]

Marriage should be about taking care of the other person and placing them first. If you both do that, few problems will come your way.

We're both completely selfish - it's been an interesting ride!

That usually ends one way.

Everyone has their time to die.....

 

[Bonzi]

What are your thoughts?

Do you think it's best to live with someone before getting married?
Aside from religious reasons, can you see any reason to NOT live with someone before marriage?

I think you need to sleep with your prospective wife so you can be sure you are sexually compatible.....you also need to sleep with her mother so that you know what sex will be like in twenty years

that's terrible......

 

[Bonzi]

i have a lot of issues with them living together...he moves 10 minutes from work to about 45 minutes from work...doesnt seem to bother him however....he gave up his place to move in with her at her place.....giving her the upper hand...he said someone always has the upper hand....did i mention playing whip noises at him....not when she is with him but when he alone....she is bossy and controlling that is my job

............

Your comments are always so insightful - what's up there? silly putty?

 

[Delta4Embassy]

What are your thoughts?

Do you think it's best to live with someone before getting married?
Aside from religious reasons, can you see any reason to NOT live with someone before marriage?

I think you need to sleep with your prospective wife so you can be sure you are sexually compatible.....you also need to sleep with her mother so that you know what sex will be like in twenty years

(idly wonders why other people get to say things like that.)

 

[Unkotare]

i have a lot of issues with them living together...he moves 10 minutes from work to about 45 minutes from work...doesnt seem to bother him however....he gave up his place to move in with her at her place.....giving her the upper hand...he said someone always has the upper hand....did i mention playing whip noises at him....not when she is with him but when he alone....she is bossy and controlling that is my job

............

Your comments are always so insightful - what's up there? silly putty?

Sorry, Opra

 

[Bonzi]

i have a lot of issues with them living together...he moves 10 minutes from work to about 45 minutes from work...doesnt seem to bother him however....he gave up his place to move in with her at her place.....giving her the upper hand...he said someone always has the upper hand....did i mention playing whip noises at him....not when she is with him but when he alone....she is bossy and controlling that is my job

............

Your comments are always so insightful - what's up there? silly putty?

Sorry, Opra

Don't like it? Don't read it. I guess you are a masochist, like to punish yourself reading things you don't enjoy.........

 

[Bonzi]

People can say whatever they want..... people don't have to like it....
They just may not like you - I live with it, you should learn to also.....

 

[Iceweasel]

Think the idea from the "Earth 2" series has a lot of emrit: marriage contracts for a fixed length of time with option to renew. Get married for 5 years, if things are still amicable after 5 years can renew for another 5.

Never heard of the show, I kinda like it. What about rentals? I could go for that, a rental bride. Maybe a short term lease with the option to own?

 

[Bonzi]

Think the idea from the "Earth 2" series has a lot of emrit: marriage contracts for a fixed length of time with option to renew. Get married for 5 years, if things are still amicable after 5 years can renew for another 5.

Never heard of the show, I kinda like it. What about rentals? I could go for that, a rental bride. Maybe a short term lease with the option to own?

Just be a slut - it's best to be honest....

 

[Delta4Embassy]

Think the idea from the "Earth 2" series has a lot of emrit: marriage contracts for a fixed length of time with option to renew. Get married for 5 years, if things are still amicable after 5 years can renew for another 5.

Never heard of the show, I kinda like it. What about rentals? I could go for that, a rental bride. Maybe a short term lease with the option to own?

Neat show. Short-lived though 94-95.