USMB Coffee Shop III

[Derideo_Te]

My daughter called me with a major dilemma today. My oldest granddaughter has become the target of the school bus bullies. And their brand of harassment has a very distinct sexual aspect.
So, the child came home in tears. After intense interrogation, the girl was able to tell my daughter some of what transpired, but not all because it is so...nasty, she does not feel comfortable repeating it.
The little girl (middle school aged) told my daughter that some other children were administering "hand jobs" to others. When asked whether she wanted to participate, she told them they were disgusting. She was then accused of masturbating. She doesn't even know what that means. As the bus was passing a dead skunk, my granddaughter was told to close her legs. There's more, but my daughter has been unable to coax the child into describing it all. These are 11-14 year old kids. My daughter has contacted school authorities but isn't very hopeful that much will be done. She says it is all she can do to resist marching down the street and asking the parents of the boy involved what their son's problem is. She's ready to pull both girls out of public school and home-school them. (The younger girl has also been having problems.)
Any suggestions?

6 Steps to Take if Your Child Is Being Bullied | Legal News | Lawyers.com

Bullying: Help your child handle a bully - Mayo Clinic

Thanks for the links. I will forward them to my daughter, although she's already done or is doing most of those things. The granddaughter has tried ignoring and walking away, only to get slapped in the back of her head if she turns her back. My daughter also told me she was going to request any plan of action by school officials be provided in writing. Depending on the response from the school, she plans on consulting JAG.

That is assault. Go to the police and file charges.

 

[BDBoop]

I know only too well what your poor grand child is going through, having suffered bullying right from the day I started school to the day I finally left, after enduring enough.

If the school has an anti bullying policy in place, they should take care of the matter, however, sometimes they think its too much trouble, and just think that if they ignore it, the problem will somehow go away.

Your grand daughter should threaten to go to a local media outlet. Schools hate bad publicity, and if members of the public find out that a child is being severely bullied and nothing is being done, you can bet the school will scramble to find a solution.

I discussed both options with my daughter. She's been trying to contact the school, has left voice messages and email. I am concerned that there may be inadequate or even inappropriate action by the school. When my granddaughter reported her problem to the bus driver, she was told he only drives the bus. Other options include home-schooling or requesting a variance to put the child in another school. I suggested that she press charges. What she's described to me is clearly sexual harassment.
I'm glad you have overcome your mistreatment. You seem to be doing quite well for yourself.

Screw the voice mails and emails. Go there in person and refuse to leave until your daughter sees the principal. Make it abundantly clear that this matter will be escalated if it isn't resolved by the school. Bullying is unacceptable and must be stopped. I am willing to bet that there are plenty of other parents who feel exactly the same way in that school.

"Send big men, tall men with bad attitudes so that they may be heard."

 

[Sarah G]

I discussed both options with my daughter. She's been trying to contact the school, has left voice messages and email. I am concerned that there may be inadequate or even inappropriate action by the school. When my granddaughter reported her problem to the bus driver, she was told he only drives the bus. Other options include home-schooling or requesting a variance to put the child in another school. I suggested that she press charges. What she's described to me is clearly sexual harassment.
I'm glad you have overcome your mistreatment. You seem to be doing quite well for yourself.

Screw the voice mails and emails. Go there in person and refuse to leave until your daughter sees the principal. Make it abundantly clear that this matter will be escalated if it isn't resolved by the school. Bullying is unacceptable and must be stopped. I am willing to bet that there are plenty of other parents who feel exactly the same way in that school.

"Send big men, tall men with bad attitudes so that they may be heard."

Or moms, lots of moms ...

 

[peach174]

Morning all !

Aww

 

[Derideo_Te]

My friend, Otis, is being released from the hospital today. He is being sent home with hospice care and his outlook is not good. The hospital has done all they can do for him. Being told that he has few days left to live. Although the death of a friend is always a sad thing, sometimes a death can be a blessing. I will miss him.

My condolences, BBD. If you can spend some time with him that would be good for both of you.

 

[Statistikhengst]

My friend, Otis, is being released from the hospital today. He is being sent home with hospice care and his outlook is not good. The hospital has done all they can do for him. Being told that he has few days left to live. Although the death of a friend is always a sad thing, sometimes a death can be a blessing. I will miss him.

Condolences and empathy.

 

[Ringel05]

I know only too well what your poor grand child is going through, having suffered bullying right from the day I started school to the day I finally left, after enduring enough.

If the school has an anti bullying policy in place, they should take care of the matter, however, sometimes they think its too much trouble, and just think that if they ignore it, the problem will somehow go away.

Your grand daughter should threaten to go to a local media outlet. Schools hate bad publicity, and if members of the public find out that a child is being severely bullied and nothing is being done, you can bet the school will scramble to find a solution.

I discussed both options with my daughter. She's been trying to contact the school, has left voice messages and email. I am concerned that there may be inadequate or even inappropriate action by the school. When my granddaughter reported her problem to the bus driver, she was told he only drives the bus. Other options include home-schooling or requesting a variance to put the child in another school. I suggested that she press charges. What she's described to me is clearly sexual harassment.
I'm glad you have overcome your mistreatment. You seem to be doing quite well for yourself.

Screw the voice mails and emails. Go there in person and refuse to leave until your daughter sees the principal. Make it abundantly clear that this matter will be escalated if it isn't resolved by the school. Bullying is unacceptable and must be stopped. I am willing to bet that there are plenty of other parents who feel exactly the same way in that school.

No, keep up the e-mails and voice mails as well as doing face to face. It provides a document trail. Also if the school is on base then there is a military officer/department who has jurisdiction over the school, advise them of the situation.

 

[BDBoop]

Screw the voice mails and emails. Go there in person and refuse to leave until your daughter sees the principal. Make it abundantly clear that this matter will be escalated if it isn't resolved by the school. Bullying is unacceptable and must be stopped. I am willing to bet that there are plenty of other parents who feel exactly the same way in that school.

"Send big men, tall men with bad attitudes so that they may be heard."

Or moms, lots of moms ...

Lots of moms can get pretty damn scary when they're on a mission, that's for sure!

 

[gallantwarrior]

My daughter called me with a major dilemma today. My oldest granddaughter has become the target of the school bus bullies. And their brand of harassment has a very distinct sexual aspect.
So, the child came home in tears. After intense interrogation, the girl was able to tell my daughter some of what transpired, but not all because it is so...nasty, she does not feel comfortable repeating it.
The little girl (middle school aged) told my daughter that some other children were administering "hand jobs" to others. When asked whether she wanted to participate, she told them they were disgusting. She was then accused of masturbating. She doesn't even know what that means. As the bus was passing a dead skunk, my granddaughter was told to close her legs. There's more, but my daughter has been unable to coax the child into describing it all. These are 11-14 year old kids. My daughter has contacted school authorities but isn't very hopeful that much will be done. She says it is all she can do to resist marching down the street and asking the parents of the boy involved what their son's problem is. She's ready to pull both girls out of public school and home-school them. (The younger girl has also been having problems.)
Any suggestions?

Yes, first and foremost your daughter needs to set an example for your granddaughter that bullying will not be tolerated. She does that by making an appointment to see the principal and no one but the principal. Once there she explains the entire situation and asks what steps the principal intends to take to remedy the problem and by when it will be done.

Whatever the principal says your daughter relays this to your granddaughter. That way she will know what to expect. Your daughter needs to hold the principal accountable. If the principal is going to take action then she needs to check in with your grand daughter and determine if the behavior has stopped.

If the principal won't take any action then it is time to escalate. As a taxpayer your daughter has certain rights and she can exercise them publicly which is the next step in the process. (Why should a bully deprive your granddaughter of the public education that your daughter is paying for?) I have no doubt whatsoever that there are other concerned parents who are equally opposed to bullying at that school. Have your daughter contact the local media and that will bring out the other anti-bullying supporters. (Not unlike you see happening right here. )

The important thing here is that your granddaughter learns that she is not alone and that bullying is antisocial behavior that is not allowed. A bullying incident occurred on my daughter's school bus when was in the 2nd grade. She wasn't the target since it was 3rd graders picking in 1st graders. I went right to the principal the following day and the matter was taken care of immediately so there was no need to escalate.

But setting that example worked because when my daughter was a junior she saw a senior bullying a freshman and so she stepped between them and stared down the bully. He backed off even though he was a foot taller and on the football team.

Best of luck to your daughter and granddaughter and positive vibes for a good outcome.

Thanks. I am confident that my daughter has a good plan. I hope that the school will respond and bring this to a halt.

 

[gallantwarrior]

I know only too well what your poor grand child is going through, having suffered bullying right from the day I started school to the day I finally left, after enduring enough.

If the school has an anti bullying policy in place, they should take care of the matter, however, sometimes they think its too much trouble, and just think that if they ignore it, the problem will somehow go away.

Your grand daughter should threaten to go to a local media outlet. Schools hate bad publicity, and if members of the public find out that a child is being severely bullied and nothing is being done, you can bet the school will scramble to find a solution.

I discussed both options with my daughter. She's been trying to contact the school, has left voice messages and email. I am concerned that there may be inadequate or even inappropriate action by the school. When my granddaughter reported her problem to the bus driver, she was told he only drives the bus. Other options include home-schooling or requesting a variance to put the child in another school. I suggested that she press charges. What she's described to me is clearly sexual harassment.
I'm glad you have overcome your mistreatment. You seem to be doing quite well for yourself.

Screw the voice mails and emails. Go there in person and refuse to leave until your daughter sees the principal. Make it abundantly clear that this matter will be escalated if it isn't resolved by the school. Bullying is unacceptable and must be stopped. I am willing to bet that there are plenty of other parents who feel exactly the same way in that school.

It was after hours. I wouldn't want to be the principal this morning. At least the daughter had time to cool down.

 

[BDBoop]

It was after hours. I wouldn't want to be the principal this morning. At least the daughter had time to cool down.

You're gonna keep us looped, right?

I wouldn't depend on her staying calmed down. Just takes one idiot insinuating your granddaughter is an active participant, and all bets are off.

Ask me how I know.

 

[gallantwarrior]

I discussed both options with my daughter. She's been trying to contact the school, has left voice messages and email. I am concerned that there may be inadequate or even inappropriate action by the school. When my granddaughter reported her problem to the bus driver, she was told he only drives the bus. Other options include home-schooling or requesting a variance to put the child in another school. I suggested that she press charges. What she's described to me is clearly sexual harassment.
I'm glad you have overcome your mistreatment. You seem to be doing quite well for yourself.

Screw the voice mails and emails. Go there in person and refuse to leave until your daughter sees the principal. Make it abundantly clear that this matter will be escalated if it isn't resolved by the school. Bullying is unacceptable and must be stopped. I am willing to bet that there are plenty of other parents who feel exactly the same way in that school.

No, keep up the e-mails and voice mails as well as doing face to face. It provides a document trail. Also if the school is on base then there is a military officer/department who has jurisdiction over the school, advise them of the situation.

My daughter's thought exactly with the documentation of her efforts. She also taped her conversation with her daughter without letting the child know it.

 

[gallantwarrior]

It was after hours. I wouldn't want to be the principal this morning. At least the daughter had time to cool down.

You're gonna keep us looped, right?

I wouldn't depend on her staying calmed down. Just takes one idiot insinuating your granddaughter is an active participant, and all bets are off.

Ask me how I know.

Ummmm, you're a momma bear too?

 

[Statistikhengst]

Inviting you all to this thread, not for it's religious, but rather, it's historical significance:


The canonization of two popes on the same day - US Message Board - Political Discussion Forum


This is a first in history.

 

[BDBoop]

It was after hours. I wouldn't want to be the principal this morning. At least the daughter had time to cool down.

You're gonna keep us looped, right?

I wouldn't depend on her staying calmed down. Just takes one idiot insinuating your granddaughter is an active participant, and all bets are off.

Ask me how I know.

Ummmm, you're a momma bear too?

Yup. Anybody stupid enough to cross one of us deserves what comes next.

 

[Darkwind]

 

[BDBoop]

That's my sister. Exactly.

 

[Againsheila]

My daughter called me with a major dilemma today. My oldest granddaughter has become the target of the school bus bullies. And their brand of harassment has a very distinct sexual aspect.
So, the child came home in tears. After intense interrogation, the girl was able to tell my daughter some of what transpired, but not all because it is so...nasty, she does not feel comfortable repeating it.
The little girl (middle school aged) told my daughter that some other children were administering "hand jobs" to others. When asked whether she wanted to participate, she told them they were disgusting. She was then accused of masturbating. She doesn't even know what that means. As the bus was passing a dead skunk, my granddaughter was told to close her legs. There's more, but my daughter has been unable to coax the child into describing it all. These are 11-14 year old kids. My daughter has contacted school authorities but isn't very hopeful that much will be done. She says it is all she can do to resist marching down the street and asking the parents of the boy involved what their son's problem is. She's ready to pull both girls out of public school and home-school them. (The younger girl has also been having problems.)
Any suggestions?

No way I would subject my child to that. And shame on the school for refusing to deal with it. And I am really big on homeschooling but it does require a great deal of dedication and discipline from the parent to do it. But if that is an option and your daughter is up to it. . . .or if there isn't a good parochial or private school as another option. . . .

I home schooled my oldest for a few years. Put him back in school for highschool thinking I wasn't good enough at teaching those subjects. He now says he wished I'd taught him though high school.

It doesn't take as much to home school as you think. You can even join co-ops and take turns teaching kids your strongest subjects.

 

[Foxfyre]

I discussed both options with my daughter. She's been trying to contact the school, has left voice messages and email. I am concerned that there may be inadequate or even inappropriate action by the school. When my granddaughter reported her problem to the bus driver, she was told he only drives the bus. Other options include home-schooling or requesting a variance to put the child in another school. I suggested that she press charges. What she's described to me is clearly sexual harassment.
I'm glad you have overcome your mistreatment. You seem to be doing quite well for yourself.

Screw the voice mails and emails. Go there in person and refuse to leave until your daughter sees the principal. Make it abundantly clear that this matter will be escalated if it isn't resolved by the school. Bullying is unacceptable and must be stopped. I am willing to bet that there are plenty of other parents who feel exactly the same way in that school.

"Send big men, tall men with bad attitudes so that they may be heard."

Around here they refer to guys in dark hats and trenchcoats from CHI'cago showing up on your doorstep. . .

 

[Foxfyre]

There was a coffee shp II???

And a warm Coffee Shop welcome to [MENTION=48630]BlackFlag[/MENTION] who is joining us for the first time this morning. Welcome, welcome, and yes, there was also a Coffee Shop I. We keep outgrowing our space here and have to remodel and build on.

So hope you are enjoying USMB and, like the rest of us, will find the Coffee Shop a refuge from the sometimes contentiousness out there. Read over the OP to see what we're all about in here, then drag up a chair and join in.

Your first timer's complimentary beverage: