You might be an atheist if:

[Votto]

You might be an atheist if:

1. Your only knowledge of the Bible comes from verses with the words "smite", "bowels", "touching", and "hell fire" in them.

2. When someone says "God bless you", you make them take it back.

3. You call a view that is held by a small percentage of the world population as common sense and natural.

4. You believe that the Founding Fathers who wrote the Constitution were deists and not Christians until it is pointed out that some of them had slaves, after which they become Bible pounding fundamentalists overnight.

5. You use a small "g" when writing the name of God but when writing the names of the planets that were named after the pagan gods you use capital letters.

6. You think that marriage is an obsolete fundy institution.............until you begin to talk about gay marriage. Then all of a sudden, its a great idea.

7. You believe that gender roles are only the product of the evil Christian patriarchy, but homosexuals were just born that way.

8. You think you know when life begins, which is after a baby is born, but do not know what a woman is.

9. You believe that extra dippy ice cream is logical proof against the existence of a God because an omniscient God would know how to stop ice cream from being extra dippy. An omnipotent God would have the ability to stop ice cream from being extra dippy, and by golly, an omnibenevolent God would not want your ice cream to be extra dippy.

10. You spend the majority of your nights trying to scratch off the words, "In God we trust" off all your money.