Child Support is unfair

[Ravi]

I think that is fine if they are still working, or trying to bring in a certain income. If they are not they need to get two jobs.

Get two jobs, and have mom go right back to court to modify the child support upwards because Dad is now working two jobs.

if dad is making more money he SHOULD pay more. no?

same as if he's making less money he should pay less money.

i'm not sure i see a problem there.

Me either. You would hope that the father would want to contribute to the well-being of his children.

 

[Luissa]

IF you are paying an unfair amount of child support because you aren't making as much money as you did or you lost your job, then your obligation is to go back to court and modify the original child support order. Don't sit around and take it. Change it. The Judge will open up the child support calculator from the computer on his bench, put in the new figures and as if by magic, you will get a new child support order.

I think that is fine if they are still working, or trying to bring in a certain income. If they are not they need to get two jobs.

Get two jobs, and have mom go right back to court to modify the child support upwards because Dad is now working two jobs.

Or mom will finally get the hundreds or thousands that is owed to her in back child support.

 

[Luissa]

Get two jobs, and have mom go right back to court to modify the child support upwards because Dad is now working two jobs.

if dad is making more money he SHOULD pay more. no?

same as if he's making less money he should pay less money.

i'm not sure i see a problem there.

Me either. You would hope that the father would want to contribute to the well-being of his children.

One would hope.

 

[Luissa]

On my last statement I was owed around 800 in back support. He only has to pay 73 a month. What does that tell you? When he can only get 13 to 30 a month, it means he should probably get another job or a second job.

 

[Katzndogz]

Get two jobs, and have mom go right back to court to modify the child support upwards because Dad is now working two jobs.

if dad is making more money he SHOULD pay more. no?

same as if he's making less money he should pay less money.

i'm not sure i see a problem there.

Me either. You would hope that the father would want to contribute to the well-being of his children.

Fathers generally (with exceptions) want to contribute to the well being of their children. Unfortunately they also want to see their ex punished and rationalizes child support as a form of punishment. Women do it too, but for this discussion, it's men. Mother spends too much money on herself. She can go without her little luxuries or personal expenses. Men think that if their ex gets her hair done, he's paying too much in child support.

 

[Borillar]

if dad is making more money he SHOULD pay more. no?

same as if he's making less money he should pay less money.

i'm not sure i see a problem there.

Me either. You would hope that the father would want to contribute to the well-being of his children.

Fathers generally (with exceptions) want to contribute to the well being of their children. Unfortunately they also want to see their ex punished and rationalizes child support as a form of punishment. Women do it too, but for this discussion, it's men. Mother spends too much money on herself. She can go without her little luxuries or personal expenses. Men think that if their ex gets her hair done, he's paying too much in child support.

Mom can use her own money to get her hair or nails done. Why should a man have to slave away for years to provide support only for it to be squandered away on crap that doesn't benefit the kid(s)?

 

[koshergrl]

Child support is REIMBURSEMENT for money mom spends on the kids.

So when you pay child support, you are REIMBURSING for money/effort that has been expended on your behalf for the children. Extra effort and money that would not be expended if you were there in person.

So if mom gets her hair done, and you pay your child support, you are not reimbursing her for her hair, you're reimbursing her for the fact that if she wants to get her hair done, she has to pay a sitter. Or you're reimbursing her for the knee pads she bought so your daughter could participate in volleyball. You're reimbursing her for the time off she had from work when she was called by the school and had to go pick up your son because he developed a rash.

BTW, having a presentable mother is beneficial to your children.

 

[Luddly Neddite]

The discussion isn't that mothers are required to use child support solely for the benefit of the child. The discussion is then how fucked up the law is that doesn't put any restrictions on how the money is spent. It's a different discussion.

I must have had this same discussion thousands of times. It's almost impossible to inject reality into a family law situation. Spouses just don't get it. Because they don't get it, they get confused that the law doesn't at all work the way they think it should. It causes way too much pain as non custodial parents realize that the money they pay might well be used for purposes having nothing to do with their child.

This conversation makes me just want to go get a vasectomy to avoid these kinds of situationd altogether to be honest.

One of my clients was being dinged for child support. At 23, he had five children by four women. He was on his way to being another Octodad! I sat him down, put him through the numbers as a counter worker at McDonalds, including salary increases and promotions with projections for the next eighteen years for just the five children he already had. The poor boy had no future, but he did go down and get a vasectomy.

"POOR BOY" ???

Typical that you side with this irresponsible jerk. In case you don't know it, its takes TWO (2) to make a pregnancy. That means the father is HALF responsible. But, all you **************** think the woman should take 100% of the responsibility even though you want to deny her the RIGHT to control her own body.

What he needed (iin the past) is a lifetime supply of condoms and some one who is intelligent enough to show him how they are used.

Glad the little twit got a vasectomy.

 

[Luddly Neddite]

Me either. You would hope that the father would want to contribute to the well-being of his children.

Fathers generally (with exceptions) want to contribute to the well being of their children. Unfortunately they also want to see their ex punished and rationalizes child support as a form of punishment. Women do it too, but for this discussion, it's men. Mother spends too much money on herself. She can go without her little luxuries or personal expenses. Men think that if their ex gets her hair done, he's paying too much in child support.

Mom can use her own money to get her hair or nails done. Why should a man have to slave away for years to provide support only for it to be squandered away on crap that doesn't benefit the kid(s)?

It seems like you and other MEN envision stacks of dollars on the table, marked "kids" and "her".

That's silly but really, the fact is, she will always spend more on YOUR kids than your piddly child support. Its just a fact of life.

 

[Bigfoot]

I am in no way defending the irresponisbility of men who lack the fortitude to take care of their own responsibility as an adult, but I firmly believe any system that awards someone with money ought to be tracked. I'm not sure about you guys but I meet far too many men with no representation regarding child support and the issues they face regarding money. How is it that the state can track EBT payments but not child support? I personally believe the system is unfair towards responsible men and are soft on irresponsible women....What say ye?

The entire child-support system is a crock of government shit aimed at taxing the American people, in this case men. It's has very little to do with helping a child and very much to do with raising more government revenue. It's a crooked and weighted system and should be abolished.

 

[koshergrl]

This conversation makes me just want to go get a vasectomy to avoid these kinds of situationd altogether to be honest.

One of my clients was being dinged for child support. At 23, he had five children by four women. He was on his way to being another Octodad! I sat him down, put him through the numbers as a counter worker at McDonalds, including salary increases and promotions with projections for the next eighteen years for just the five children he already had. The poor boy had no future, but he did go down and get a vasectomy.

"POOR BOY" ???

Typical that you side with this irresponsible jerk. In case you don't know it, its takes TWO (2) to make a pregnancy. That means the father is HALF responsible. But, all you whiny rw's think the woman should take 100% of the responsibility even though you want to deny her the RIGHT to control her own body.

What he needed (iin the past) is a lifetime supply of condoms and some one who is intelligent enough to show him how they are used.

Glad the little twit got a vasectomy.

Wait..I'm a rightwinger and Rav and I and katz are the primary holdouts supporting a child's right to support from both parents, and a limit to control by the non-custodial parent over how the support is spent.

 

[Politico]

It seems like you and other MEN envision stacks of dollars on the table, marked "kids" and "her".

That's because for some reason the women seem to forget they would have to have a car and rent and groceries whether they had a kid or not.

 

[koshergrl]

Not necessarily, and the fact of the matter is, they share that car, rent and groceries with their children.

If I didn't have kids, I wouldn't need a Ford Explorer, I wouldn't spend $400 a month on groceries, and I certainly wouldn't need a 3-bedroom house with 2 bathrooms.

 

[Luddly Neddite]

I am in no way defending the irresponisbility of men who lack the fortitude to take care of their own responsibility as an adult, but I firmly believe any system that awards someone with money ought to be tracked. I'm not sure about you guys but I meet far too many men with no representation regarding child support and the issues they face regarding money. How is it that the state can track EBT payments but not child support? I personally believe the system is unfair towards responsible men and are soft on irresponsible women....What say ye?

The entire child-support system is a crock of government shit aimed at taxing the American people, in this case men. It's has very little to do with helping a child and very much to do with raising more government revenue. It's a crooked and weighted system and should be abolished.

Where's the "tax" on "the American people"?
And replaced with what?

 

[Luddly Neddite]

Please note that I attempted to edit my post above so that I would be within the rules for this forum .

 

[jillian]

I am in no way defending the irresponisbility of men who lack the fortitude to take care of their own responsibility as an adult, but I firmly believe any system that awards someone with money ought to be tracked. I'm not sure about you guys but I meet far too many men with no representation regarding child support and the issues they face regarding money. How is it that the state can track EBT payments but not child support? I personally believe the system is unfair towards responsible men and are soft on irresponsible women....What say ye?

The entire child-support system is a crock of government shit aimed at taxing the American people, in this case men. It's has very little to do with helping a child and very much to do with raising more government revenue. It's a crooked and weighted system and should be abolished.

Where's the "tax" on "the American people"?
And replaced with what?

i wouldn't pay much attention to him. cause that post has dead-beat dad written all over it.

 

[elvis]

I am in no way defending the irresponisbility of men who lack the fortitude to take care of their own responsibility as an adult, but I firmly believe any system that awards someone with money ought to be tracked. I'm not sure about you guys but I meet far too many men with no representation regarding child support and the issues they face regarding money. How is it that the state can track EBT payments but not child support? I personally believe the system is unfair towards responsible men and are soft on irresponsible women....What say ye?

child support is unfair?

It's a risk you take when making love.

simple really.

 

[Ravi]

Someone, I think it was HG, said $300 a month was a fair amount for child support.

WTF?

That's 3,600 a year. You can't care for yourself on that. That doesn't even come close to poverty level heights.

 

[elvis]

Someone, I think it was HG, said $300 a month was a fair amount for child support.

WTF?

That's 3,600 a year. You can't care for yourself on that. That doesn't even come close to poverty level heights.

Is that child support taxable? and no it's not nearly enough.

 

[Luissa]

Me either. You would hope that the father would want to contribute to the well-being of his children.

Fathers generally (with exceptions) want to contribute to the well being of their children. Unfortunately they also want to see their ex punished and rationalizes child support as a form of punishment. Women do it too, but for this discussion, it's men. Mother spends too much money on herself. She can go without her little luxuries or personal expenses. Men think that if their ex gets her hair done, he's paying too much in child support.

Mom can use her own money to get her hair or nails done. Why should a man have to slave away for years to provide support only for it to be squandered away on crap that doesn't benefit the kid(s)?

Yea mothers just get their hair done and don't pay for clothes, daycare, medical, and food for their child.