Quantum Windbag
Gold Member
- May 9, 2010
- 58,308
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If he doesn't make you laugh you are dead, or so far left you think Obama is right wing.
(Yes, [MENTION=20394]rdean[/MENTION], I am talking about you.)
It was the Year of the Zombies. Not in the sense of most of humanity dying from a horrible plague and then reanimating as mindless flesh-eating ghouls. No, it was much worse than that. Because as bad as a zombie apocalypse would be, at least it wouldnt involve the resurrection of Anthony Weiners most private part.
We thought that thing was out of our lives forever, but suddenly there it was again, all over the Internet, as Weiner came back from the political grave like the phoenix, the mythical bird that arose from the ashes to run for mayor of New York and use the name Carlos Danger to text obscene photos of its privates to somebody named Sydney Leathers.
But getting back to the zombies: It wasnt just people who came back alarmingly in 2013. The Cold War with Russia came back. Al-Qaeda came back. Turmoil in the Middle East came back. The debt ceiling came back. The major league baseball drug scandal came back. Dennis Rodman came back and went on humanitarian missions to North Korea (or maybe we just hallucinated that). The Endlessly Looming Government Shutdown came back. People lining up to buy iPhones to replace iPhones that they bought only minutes earlier came back. And for approximately the 250th time, the Obama administration pivoted back to the economy, which has somehow been recovering for years now without actually getting any better. Unfortunately, before they could get the darned thing fixed, the administration had to pivot back to yet another zombie issue, health care, because it turned out that Obamacare, despite all the massive brainpower behind it, had some glitches, in the same sense that the universe has some atoms.
Washington faces another crisis in the form of a sequester that will happen automatically unless Congress can agree on a budget, which seems unlikely inasmuch as Congress cannot agree on what planet this is. If the sequester goes into effect, federal spending will continue to rise, but not quite as fast as it would have risen without the sequester. To a normal human, this means government spending is still increasing, but to Washington, the sequester means draconian cuts and is a looming disaster of epic proportions. Panic grips the city, as grim-faced former student council presidents write talking points far into the night.
Dave Barry?s Review of 2013, the Year of the Zombies - The Washington Post
(Yes, [MENTION=20394]rdean[/MENTION], I am talking about you.)
It was the Year of the Zombies. Not in the sense of most of humanity dying from a horrible plague and then reanimating as mindless flesh-eating ghouls. No, it was much worse than that. Because as bad as a zombie apocalypse would be, at least it wouldnt involve the resurrection of Anthony Weiners most private part.
We thought that thing was out of our lives forever, but suddenly there it was again, all over the Internet, as Weiner came back from the political grave like the phoenix, the mythical bird that arose from the ashes to run for mayor of New York and use the name Carlos Danger to text obscene photos of its privates to somebody named Sydney Leathers.
But getting back to the zombies: It wasnt just people who came back alarmingly in 2013. The Cold War with Russia came back. Al-Qaeda came back. Turmoil in the Middle East came back. The debt ceiling came back. The major league baseball drug scandal came back. Dennis Rodman came back and went on humanitarian missions to North Korea (or maybe we just hallucinated that). The Endlessly Looming Government Shutdown came back. People lining up to buy iPhones to replace iPhones that they bought only minutes earlier came back. And for approximately the 250th time, the Obama administration pivoted back to the economy, which has somehow been recovering for years now without actually getting any better. Unfortunately, before they could get the darned thing fixed, the administration had to pivot back to yet another zombie issue, health care, because it turned out that Obamacare, despite all the massive brainpower behind it, had some glitches, in the same sense that the universe has some atoms.
Washington faces another crisis in the form of a sequester that will happen automatically unless Congress can agree on a budget, which seems unlikely inasmuch as Congress cannot agree on what planet this is. If the sequester goes into effect, federal spending will continue to rise, but not quite as fast as it would have risen without the sequester. To a normal human, this means government spending is still increasing, but to Washington, the sequester means draconian cuts and is a looming disaster of epic proportions. Panic grips the city, as grim-faced former student council presidents write talking points far into the night.
Dave Barry?s Review of 2013, the Year of the Zombies - The Washington Post
