What is the equivalent of "my dude" when addressing a female?

[Unkotare]

"Playground names? "Dimwitted child?"

Please tell me you see the irony?

Nope.

 

[Toro]

"My beotches"

One of my employees said this to our female employees. He was - I'm told - very good looking.

I told my wife this and she laughed.

I'd have gotten fired for doing this same thing.

 

[ClaireH]

"My beotches"

One of my employees said this to our female employees. He was - I'm told - very good looking.

I told my wife this and she laughed.

I'd have gotten fired for doing this same thing.

You make a good point Toro. People in general (dating back to post cave dweller times) notice the appearance of others and often shift their responses/attitudes accordingly. Often, kids will “allow” an attractive teacher more leeway. Right or wrong it’s reality.

Within the school setting, teacher/student dynamics are unique to each classroom, and within one classroom you usually find kids with differing opinions about the teacher. That said, there is still an underlying consensus that is easy to see, and either the class “likes/respects/relates” to a teacher or the class has little to no respect for a specific teacher.

The level of respect a class has or doesn’t have for a teacher matters greatly. Am I talking about teachers catering to their every whim? Not in the least. Kids respect teachers who maintain a backbone and do not respect teachers who “try too hard” to be liked doing things they wouldn’t ordinarily do on their own time. As we know, kids don’t miss much.

Students pick up on how a teacher decides to dress which sends a clear message too. My daughter as an 8th grader relayed that a substitute teacher had worn a low cut blouse to school which said she described looked desperate and disgusting lol Yep, even how a teacher dresses isn’t missed by the kids.

Using dude, my dude, hey bro, or similar is perceived as trying too hard. Unless it’s a well liked PE teacher or respected coach, it’s not a good choice. Another example from my daughter’s perspective in 11th grade, a male teacher wanted to be a cool teacher so that the cool kids would like him. She said that most kids laughed at him behind his back but to his face, because he was a big teacher, laughed along with him. Long story short: using pre-teen/teenage terms like my dude is trying too hard.

 

[ReinyDays]

Good point.

Here is my take on impaired kids who become violent when non-impaired kids bully them. It is a great lesson in the math of probability for the bully.

I once had a third grader with intellectual disability and severe behavior. He went in the boys bathroom and a fifth grader mocked him for "talking like a baby." When the fifth grader turned to use the urinal, the third grader ran and jumped up to slam the kids head into the tile wall. Our principal told me that the bump looked like a cartoon of a person getting a lump on their head.

When that fifth grader decided to bully a much smaller impaired child, he would have likely thougth that the possibility of that leading a trip to the emergency room was this: 0. It turned out that it was this: >0. A lesson there, once he stopped being woozy enough to learn it.

Bullies aren't suspended and criminal referrals sent to your local DA? ...

GET OUT ... there's going to be a kid bringing an AR-15 in your future ... haven't you been following the news? ... schools that tolerate bullying are getting shot up, kids murdered ... teachers looking embarrassed ...

This isn't about special ed, this is about a lack of responsibility in the general ed side ...

=====

I only recently learned my older brother was all but tortured in high school by bullies ... he graduated before I started, and the bullies thought me an easy target ... HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW HAW ... I had the GPA to start a fight in the classroom every time, with the expectation of getting NO punishment of any kind ... the sad part is I was part of their clique within just a couple months ... the bullies were the only kids who smoked pot, and they knew I was dropping acid ... so automatic cool ...

 

[Seymour Flops]

You make a good point Toro. People in general (dating back to post cave dweller times) notice the appearance of others and often shift their responses/attitudes accordingly. Often, kids will “allow” an attractive teacher more leeway. Right or wrong it’s reality.

I havent found that true at all and I am VERY attractive.

Within the school setting, teacher/student dynamics are unique to each classroom, and within one classroom you usually find kids with differing opinions about the teacher. That said, there is still an underlying consensus that is easy to see, and either the class “likes/respects/relates” to a teacher or the class has little to no respect for a specific teacher.

The level of respect a class has or doesn’t have for a teacher matters greatly. Am I talking about teachers catering to their every whim? Not in the least. Kids respect teachers who maintain a backbone and do not respect teachers who “try too hard” to be liked doing things they wouldn’t ordinarily do on their own time. As we know, kids don’t miss much.

Students pick up on how a teacher decides to dress which sends a clear message too. My daughter as an 8th grader relayed that a substitute teacher had worn a low cut blouse to school which said she described looked desperate and disgusting lol Yep, even how a teacher dresses isn’t missed by the kids.

Using dude, my dude, hey bro, or similar is perceived as trying too hard. Unless it’s a well liked PE teacher or respected coach, it’s not a good choice. Another example from my daughter’s perspective in 11th grade, a male teacher wanted to be a cool teacher so that the cool kids would like him. She said that most kids laughed at him behind his back but to his face, because he was a big teacher, laughed along with him. Long story short: using pre-teen/teenage terms like my dude is trying too hard.

Fear is much more reliable.

 

[Billo_Really]

Um...."Hey Betty!"

 

[ClaireH]

I havent found that true at all and I am VERY attractive.

Fear is much more reliable.

OP’s response: “I havent found that true at all and I am VERY attractive”. Well, don’t take my word for it, do a little research. Multiple studies from various decades support the following:

“Consistent with my predictions, instructor attractiveness influenced participant’s ability at a learning task. Additionally gender did not influence this effect. Finally I replicated previous findings demonstrating the role attractiveness plays in person perception. These results demonstrate that physical attractiveness not only influences person perception but creates tangible effects on human performance in real world situations.”

Effects of Instructor Attractiveness on Classroom Learning

Although there have been multiple studies examining the effects of physical attractiveness on a variety of human interactions, one domain has been largely overlooked. The current thesis examined the effect of teacher attractiveness on a learning task. Specifically participants were exposed to...

digitalscholarship.unlv.edu

There are many studies easy to pull up in various PubMed journal entries supporting this premise.

As mentioned before, it’s not “right” but based upon the reality of how humans view others, it’s part of the packaging deal, although one’s personality trumps looks by far. Ah yes, personality. So you are VERY attractive, what about your personality? Lol I’m still stuck on the part that you are considering calling your students dudes, male or female, doesn’t matter. Do you think that they would respect you more is that the bottom line? You are wrong. I don’t care how old you are, even if you’re 23, as a teacher you’re not in the role to be their friend, dude.

Back to the topic, students use visual cues to form an opinion about their teachers, of which most variables can be a choice. For instance, whether or not a female teacher wears a top that’s appropriate for a club but not a school, and she wears it to school anyway. If a teacher comes to class looking like he or she hasn’t had a bath in a few weeks, (we’ve all seen at least one teacher either from our own school experience or our kids’) this is an easy message for students. The message is: I don’t care…so why should their students care if they consider themselves an example?

I’m leaving your last comment halfway alone about teaching through fear. Because you identified yourself as working with emotionally disturbed kids, yes, some can be a handful, and then again, I know of a 5 foot nothing teacher who had full respect of her ED kids. Intimidating the kids in any respect was not her game nor is it needed by well-suited SE teachers. It definitely takes a special person to be a successful special ed teacher, but I know several personally.

 

[ABikerSailor]

OP’s response: “I havent found that true at all and I am VERY attractive”. Well, don’t take my word for it, do a little research. Multiple studies from various decades support the following:

“Consistent with my predictions, instructor attractiveness influenced participant’s ability at a learning task. Additionally gender did not influence this effect. Finally I replicated previous findings demonstrating the role attractiveness plays in person perception. These results demonstrate that physical attractiveness not only influences person perception but creates tangible effects on human performance in real world situations.”

Effects of Instructor Attractiveness on Classroom Learning

Although there have been multiple studies examining the effects of physical attractiveness on a variety of human interactions, one domain has been largely overlooked. The current thesis examined the effect of teacher attractiveness on a learning task. Specifically participants were exposed to...

digitalscholarship.unlv.edu

There are many studies easy to pull up in various PubMed journal entries supporting this premise.

As mentioned before, it’s not “right” but based upon the reality of how humans view others, it’s part of the packaging deal, although one’s personality trumps looks by far. Ah yes, personality. So you are VERY attractive, what about your personality? Lol I’m still stuck on the part that you are considering calling your students dudes, male or female, doesn’t matter. Do you think that they would respect you more is that the bottom line? You are wrong. I don’t care how old you are, even if you’re 23, as a teacher you’re not in the role to be their friend, dude.

Back to the topic, students use visual cues to form an opinion about their teachers, of which most variables can be a choice. For instance, whether or not a female teacher wears a top that’s appropriate for a club but not a school, and she wears it to school anyway. If a teacher comes to class looking like he or she hasn’t had a bath in a few weeks, (we’ve all seen at least one teacher either from our own school experience or our kids’) this is an easy message for students. The message is: I don’t care…so why should their students care if they consider themselves an example?

I’m leaving your last comment halfway alone about teaching through fear. Because you identified yourself as working with emotionally disturbed kids, yes, some can be a handful, and then again, I know of a 5 foot nothing teacher who had full respect of her ED kids. Intimidating the kids in any respect was not her game nor is it needed by well-suited SE teachers. It definitely takes a special person to be a successful special ed teacher, but I know several personally.

Hate to say it, but I agree with you. People in the military who had 4.0 uniforms (meaning they were within regs and looked like recruiting posters) were generally held in higher regard than those who were just within regs, even if the person in the 4.0 uniform was a walking soup sandwich.

Me? If I needed something (especially from the Engineering department), I didn't go looking for the person with a starched uniform and spit shined shoes, I looked for the person who had a bit of grease and dirt about them, as I knew they were probably the person who did the actual work and knew more about the equipment than the person who looked like a recruiting poster.

 

[ClaireH]

Hate to say it, but I agree with you. People in the military who had 4.0 uniforms (meaning they were within regs and looked like recruiting posters) were generally held in higher regard than those who were just within regs, even if the person in the 4.0 uniform was a walking soup sandwich.

Me? If I needed something (especially from the Engineering department), I didn't go looking for the person with a starched uniform and spit shined shoes, I looked for the person who had a bit of grease and dirt about them, as I knew they were probably the person who did the actual work and knew more about the equipment than the person who looked like a recruiting poster.

Great addition to this thread ABS, seen from a military perspective. And it’s a funny thing about human nature, when we see somebody looking “too polished” it can work against them coming off as unapproachable. I’m similar to you in life, knowing that those working down in the dirt know more than say a polished executive counting his bitcoins. Lol

I always appreciate us commoners for doing our best in figuring things out, given the tools we have to use and the tools we don’t have but others do. I’m admittedly overly critical at times with certain people, and get this irony, usually when I see or hear someone else being overly critical lol We humans make perfect specimens for some advanced civilization to study, not sure how positive the results would be but it’d be an interesting read!

 

[Seymour Flops]

OP’s response: “I havent found that true at all and I am VERY attractive”. Well, don’t take my word for it, do a little research. Multiple studies from various decades support the following:

Love me some science, claire!

“Consistent with my predictions, instructor attractiveness influenced participant’s ability at a learning task. Additionally gender did not influence this effect. Finally I replicated previous findings demonstrating the role attractiveness plays in person perception. These results demonstrate that physical attractiveness not only influences person perception but creates tangible effects on human performance in real world situations.”

Effects of Instructor Attractiveness on Classroom Learning

Although there have been multiple studies examining the effects of physical attractiveness on a variety of human interactions, one domain has been largely overlooked. The current thesis examined the effect of teacher attractiveness on a learning task. Specifically participants were exposed to...

digitalscholarship.unlv.edu

There are many studies easy to pull up in various PubMed journal entries supporting this premise.

Well, that explains a lot now that I get what you're saying. Yes I've always been an extremely effective teacher, as well as unusually attractive as a person. I guess things like that go hand in hand.

As mentioned before, it’s not “right” but based upon the reality of how humans view others, it’s part of the packaging deal, although one’s personality trumps looks by far. Ah yes, personality. So you are VERY attractive, what about your personality? Lol I’m still stuck on the part that you are considering calling your students dudes, male or female, doesn’t matter.

I think you may have made the mistake of reading what another poster said I said instead of reading what I said. I wasn't at all talking about calling my students dudes my dudes dudes or any other nonsense like that. In fact, I actually address all of my students as student or by their name.

Do you think that they would respect you more is that the bottom line? You are wrong. I don’t care how old you are, even if you’re 23, as a teacher you’re not in the role to be their friend, dude.

No ma'am! Bless your heart, you just misunderstood what the op was about. I was talking about a condescending little bit of fake friendliness to use on a particularly annoying adult who needs to realize that no matter how hard they try to get my attention she is not going to Rattle me or calls me to pay her any more attention than absolutely necessary. But I need to do that in a way that allows me to claim complete innocence if she complains.

Back to the topic, students use visual cues to form an opinion about their teachers, of which most variables can be a choice. For instance, whether or not a female teacher wears a top that’s appropriate for a club but not a school, and she wears it to school anyway. If a teacher comes to class looking like he or she hasn’t had a bath in a few weeks, (we’ve all seen at least one teacher either from our own school experience or our kids’) this is an easy message for students. The message is: I don’t care…so why should their students care if they consider themselves an example?

In my district, I'm not seeing a lot of clubwear or revealing where or inappropriate where in that way. What I'm seeing is the younger teachers coming to school in what amounts to pajamas or yoga pants or otherwise far too casual for a professional. On jeans days the principal has to police the ladies to not wear jeans with holes in them, something I find unbelievable.

I’m leaving your last comment halfway alone about teaching through fear. Because you identified yourself as working with emotionally disturbed kids, yes, some can be a handful, and then again, I know of a 5 foot nothing teacher who had full respect of her ED kids. Intimidating the kids in any respect was not her game nor is it needed by well-suited SE teachers. It definitely takes a special person to be a successful special ed teacher, but I know several personally.

My comment about teaching through fear, was actually meant to be tongue in cheek. But I can see where that might have been obvious. No I have never tried to make my students afraid of me. I find the best way to get their respect is to give them respect, no matter what they do. There is no reason ever to get angry at a child with a disability for acting out. No reason because it makes no sense, any more than getting angry at a short person for not being able to dunk a basketball or getting angry at an intellectually disabled person for not being able to do calculus. Also getting angry would be completely counterproductive to getting the behavior back on track.

 

[ClaireH]

Love me some science, claire!

Well, that explains a lot now that I get what you're saying. Yes I've always been an extremely effective teacher, as well as unusually attractive as a person. I guess things like that go hand in hand.

I think you may have made the mistake of reading what another poster said I said instead of reading what I said. I wasn't at all talking about calling my students dudes my dudes dudes or any other nonsense like that. In fact, I actually address all of my students as student or by their name.

No ma'am! Bless your heart, you just misunderstood what the op was about. I was talking about a condescending little bit of fake friendliness to use on a particularly annoying adult who needs to realize that no matter how hard they try to get my attention she is not going to Rattle me or calls me to pay her any more attention than absolutely necessary. But I need to do that in a way that allows me to claim complete innocence if she complains.

In my district, I'm not seeing a lot of clubwear or revealing where or inappropriate where in that way. What I'm seeing is the younger teachers coming to school in what amounts to pajamas or yoga pants or otherwise far too casual for a professional. On jeans days the principal has to police the ladies to not wear jeans with holes in them, something I find unbelievable.

My comment about teaching through fear, was actually meant to be tongue in cheek. But I can see where that might have been obvious. No I have never tried to make my students afraid of me. I find the best way to get their respect is to give them respect, no matter what they do. There is no reason ever to get angry at a child with a disability for acting out. No reason because it makes no sense, any more than getting angry at a short person for not being able to dunk a basketball or getting angry at an intellectually disabled person for not being able to do calculus. Also getting angry would be completely counterproductive to getting the behavior back on track.

Turns out, this is one of those times when I’m glad I was wrong. Evidently, I did confuse a remark made by another poster so my questions and comments should have been directed at the other poster. Sorry for the mistake.

Your comment about respecting your students, no matter how they act out, reveals a lot. I have never understood why a person would go into teaching, in any grade level, who does not respect their students or respect any other little people in general. Not only have I experienced this as a student, but also witnessed this among fellow coworkers, past and current. I really don’t get it. If a person is an authoritarian type they shouldn’t even be a teacher imo, but if they do they should make sure it’s at the university level. Kids deserve to be kids, not meaning they should ever be in charge of the classroom. Kids need to feel free to ask questions without being ridiculed by the adult in the room. Kids learn from making mistakes, and good teachers promote self-esteem so kids will “risk” being wrong again and again.

Well, I’m glad to know you respect your students, because that typically results in a two-way street. Keep up the good work. I’ll give you an A-. The minus is due to the dynamic you described with your co-worker, counselor I believe? Interesting… but I’m always interested in psychological tricks of manipulation as a psych major lol I have to add that it’s much better to avoid such trickery, particularly when dealing with people within your work environment, but I cannot make the claim I’m free of it myself. More muted and more direct usually eliminates the need for one-upping etc. Agree?

 

[Seymour Flops]

Turns out, this is one of those times when I’m glad I was wrong. Evidently, I did confuse a remark made by another poster so my questions and comments should have been directed at the other poster. Sorry for the mistake.

Your comment about respecting your students, no matter how they act out, reveals a lot. I have never understood why a person would go into teaching, in any grade level, who does not respect their students or respect any other little people in general. Not only have I experienced this as a student, but also witnessed this among fellow coworkers, past and current. I really don’t get it. If a person is an authoritarian type they shouldn’t even be a teacher imo, but if they do they should make sure it’s at the university level. Kids deserve to be kids, not meaning they should ever be in charge of the classroom. Kids need to feel free to ask questions without being ridiculed by the adult in the room. Kids learn from making mistakes, and good teachers promote self-esteem so kids will “risk” being wrong again and again.

Thank you for your kind words~

Well, I’m glad to know you respect your students, because that typically results in a two-way street. Keep up the good work. I’ll give you an A-. The minus is due to the dynamic you described with your co-worker, counselor I believe? Interesting… but I’m always interested in psychological tricks of manipulation as a psych major lol I have to add that it’s much better to avoid such trickery, particularly when dealing with people within your work environment, but I cannot make the claim I’m free of it myself. More muted and more direct usually eliminates the need for one-upping etc. Agree?

I have a degree in psychology also. I'll agree that usually muted and direct eliminates the need for one-upping, etc. Key word being "usually." This is a rare indulgence for me.

 

[Unkotare]

...... I have never understood why a person would go into teaching, in any grade level, who does not respect their students or respect any other little people in general. ....

"Little people"? I have more than a few students who are at least 6'4" and 285lbs+

 

[ClaireH]

"Little people"? I have more than a few students who are at least 6'4" and 285lbs+

Of course. I paused when I use that phrase, but teaching at a middle school (5th to 8th) there are many “little people” even among 8th graders who’ve yet to hit puberty. Older grades still have a range with most kids growing so fast they’ve yet to gain full stature.

I remember as a pipsqueak freshman in high school, noticing how many of the older boys looked like men: large, tall, gait, full beards. It was an adjustment coming from middle school.

But sure, my myopic view prompted the little people phrase based upon my experience. All teachers have an off-day, but the burnout phase I referenced is when a teacher consistently has “the sky is falling” outlook, not good for anyone.

My assessment is a generalization but from my experience, when a teacher shows obvious signs of burnout but continues to teach, she or he will make negative comments about kids in general.

As you likely know, a teacher’s lounge can be a mixed bag with small groups of teachers choosing to sit with teachers they like or at least respect. When the lounge has a very boisterous negative type (not a this day couldn’t get any worse, but everyday is doom and gloom bs) it can really throw things off in a small sized school. I’ve witnessed it. It’s up to the other teachers to either ignore that person or to try to break through to them suggesting a career change. Even for teachers who’ve been teaching for over 30 years, it’s not too late to find a better fit in employment. Some who choose to “stick it out” aren’t doing anyone any favors.

 

[Unkotare]

Of course. I paused when I use that phrase, but teaching at a middle school (5th to 8th) there are many “little people” even among 8th graders who’ve yet to hit puberty. Older grades still have a range with most kids growing so fast they’ve yet to gain full stature.

I remember as a pipsqueak freshman in high school, noticing how many of the older boys looked like men: large, tall, gait, full beards. It was an adjustment coming from middle school.

But sure, my myopic view prompted the little people phrase based upon my experience. All teachers have an off-day, but the burnout phase I referenced is when a teacher consistently has “the sky is falling” outlook, not good for anyone.

My assessment is a generalization but from my experience, when a teacher shows obvious signs of burnout but continues to teach, she or he will make negative comments about kids in general.

As you likely know, a teacher’s lounge can be a mixed bag with small groups of teachers choosing to sit with teachers they like or at least respect. When the lounge has a very boisterous negative type (not a this day couldn’t get any worse, but everyday is doom and gloom bs) it can really throw things off in a small sized school. I’ve witnessed it. It’s up to the other teachers to either ignore that person or to try to break through to them suggesting a career change. Even for teachers who’ve been teaching for over 30 years, it’s not too late to find a better fit in employment. Some who choose to “stick it out” aren’t doing anyone any favors.

We have at least one avowed teacher who often posts here who fits that bill.

 

[Seymour Flops]

As you likely know, a teacher’s lounge can be a mixed bag with small groups of teachers choosing to sit with teachers they like or at least respect. When the lounge has a very boisterous negative type (not a this day couldn’t get any worse, but everyday is doom and gloom bs) it can really throw things off in a small sized school. I’ve witnessed it. It’s up to the other teachers to either ignore that person or to try to break through to them suggesting a career change. Even for teachers who’ve been teaching for over 30 years, it’s not too late to find a better fit in employment. Some who choose to “stick it out” aren’t doing anyone any favors.

Yikes!

Uncle Charlie's ears must be burning.

I happen to teach at a low-income/ESL/1st and 2nd gen immigrants school which is part of an otherwise upper-middle class district that gets lots of funding from taxes on our oil industry and voluntary donations from those great corporations.

The district is high-energy, dedicated, and has long had the reputation for only hiring the best of teachers, and at my school, we are relentless in helping these students overcome all obstacles to getting to college. But this year, with COVID, we had to scrape that bottom of the barrel. Like this teacher still has splinters on her.

She has taught at about fifteen districts in twenty-two years. She complains endlessly, gossips about other teachers, while all the time trying to pump people for information about her own chances of being asked back next year.

The classic "one bad apple."

 

[ClaireH]

Yikes!

Uncle Charlie's ears must be burning.

I happen to teach at a low-income/ESL/1st and 2nd gen immigrants school which is part of an otherwise upper-middle class district that gets lots of funding from taxes on our oil industry and voluntary donations from those great corporations.

The district is high-energy, dedicated, and has long had the reputation for only hiring the best of teachers, and at my school, we are relentless in helping these students overcome all obstacles to getting to college. But this year, with COVID, we had to scrape that bottom of the barrel. Like this teacher still has splinters on her.

She has taught at about fifteen districts in twenty-two years. She complains endlessly, gossips about other teachers, while all the time trying to pump people for information about her own chances of being asked back next year.

The classic "one bad apple."

One negative teacher among many others can be much easier to manage than one among a limited number, but yes, a toxic personality is a negative addition to any faculty. I have little doubt that that particular teacher fuels a negative dynamic with her students, or perhaps just a frantic mess since it doesn’t sound like she handles stress very well. We all have our ways of reducing stress, but with that many years of experience something’s not working. Some might say too late to change, but maybe you should suggest yoga and meditation! Lol I love giving positive suggestions to prune faces who, complain about the smallest of 1st world problems and constantly complain, yet do nothing to try to turn in around, usually bringing all of the negativity on themselves -100%. “It’s the world’s fault” or always someone else’s fault… those are obvious clues.

To be fair, I have days when I’m more tired and not my best self, but avoid blaming others for my own attitude. I gave that up around 6th grade.

 

[Seymour Flops]

One negative teacher among many others can be much easier to manage than one among a limited number, but yes, a toxic personality is a negative addition to any faculty. I have little doubt that that particular teacher fuels a negative dynamic with her students, or perhaps just a frantic mess since it doesn’t sound like she handles stress very well. We all have our ways of reducing stress, but with that many years of experience something’s not working. Some might say too late to change, but maybe you should suggest yoga and meditation!

Hm. I may try that. My next go-to was euthanasia, so thanks.

Lol I love giving positive suggestions to prune faces who, complain about the smallest of 1st world problems and constantly complain, yet do nothing to try to turn in around, usually bringing all of the negativity on themselves -100%. “It’s the world’s fault” or always someone else’s fault… those are obvious clues.

Ha! That is my guilty pleasure, also. This particular counselor has always had an unfortunate case of RBF, so I have cut her a lot of slack for the negativity. She was much better after Xmas break and the staffing went well, with no snark on her part, so I am letting that go, having bigger fish, etc.

To be fair, I have days when I’m more tired and not my best self, but avoid blaming others for my own attitude. I gave that up around 6th grade.

We have to, don't we? Kudos!

 

[Coyote]

I need some advice from USMB folk of all political stripes.

Here's the situation: I teach special education students with behavioral issues. I am literally a "behavior teacher." Idiotic job, but that is the state of education in the US of A.

I have a counselor who has gotten involved with one of my students, and has implied criticism of the way I approach dealing with the student. I have to stomp out such behavior immediately.

She has called for a staffing (meeting) about the student, and I am sure her only goal is to slam the way I have been dealing with the student, and try to force me to change. I want to avoid that lke the plague. It is a bit of a toe-stepping for a counselor to get involved with a Special Education student's behavior, but not officially frowned on.

For my reponse, I need a form of address that carries all the condescension loosely disguised as respect/affection that "my dude" carries, but for a female.

Should I just say "my dude," even though she is female? Or is something else more appropriate? She is very progressive so a non-binary form of address would be perfect, if I knew of a non-binary form of "my dude." "My chick" doesn't seem to meet the goal of condescending without provably condescending. What say you?

TIA!

Hmmm…

Darlin’?

Madam?

Queen Bee?

Mistress?

 

[Seymour Flops]

Hmmm…

Darlin’?

Madam?

Queen Bee?

Mistress?

Hm. I'm sixty now. I wonder if I could get away with "honey" or "sweetie."