LOIE
Gold Member
- May 11, 2017
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This thread is in response to several questions I’ve been asked recently. It has been suggested that since I am a white person, I cannot know what black people experience in this country.
In 1971 I moved from Lancaster County, PA into North Philadelphia to work at a Christian Youth Organization. I was one of a hand full of whites there. Then in 1980, I married a black man and we have lived together in black neighborhoods ever since. He told me from the very beginning “You stay white, and I’ll stay black,” and that’s what we have done. I feel as though I have been given insights into what black people experience. And since most white people don’t get those insights, I’ve been trying to share what I have learned. While I site other authors and sometimes refer to statistics or something I’ve read, my convictions have come from my experiences alone. And while you can argue with someone’s viewpoint and perceptions, you cannot argue with their experiences. It is what makes them who they are.
Folks have mentioned the Black Experience. My husband has told me many times over the years that the Black Experience in America is that you cannot be yourself. It’s being told by a white catholic brother that you can’t play the trumpet because your lips are too big (he suggests the tuba instead.) It’s being told by the white piano teacher that you can’t play the piano because your fingers are too small. It’s being followed around the store by the salespeople, picking up their negative, suspicious vibe before you even see them. It’s walking down the street with a smile on your face and watching the first white lady you come across tighten the grip on her handbag. It’s standing on the corner when a white person pulls up to the stop sign, sees you and quickly locks all of the doors. It’s seeing black people on the news night after night, in handcuffs, being taken away as criminals. It’s wanting to speak up at work when you see unequal treatment, but knowing you may lose your job if you do. It’s being angry at injustice, but being told to shut up and forget about the past, like it has nothing to do with the present.
In 1971 I moved from Lancaster County, PA into North Philadelphia to work at a Christian Youth Organization. I was one of a hand full of whites there. Then in 1980, I married a black man and we have lived together in black neighborhoods ever since. He told me from the very beginning “You stay white, and I’ll stay black,” and that’s what we have done. I feel as though I have been given insights into what black people experience. And since most white people don’t get those insights, I’ve been trying to share what I have learned. While I site other authors and sometimes refer to statistics or something I’ve read, my convictions have come from my experiences alone. And while you can argue with someone’s viewpoint and perceptions, you cannot argue with their experiences. It is what makes them who they are.
Folks have mentioned the Black Experience. My husband has told me many times over the years that the Black Experience in America is that you cannot be yourself. It’s being told by a white catholic brother that you can’t play the trumpet because your lips are too big (he suggests the tuba instead.) It’s being told by the white piano teacher that you can’t play the piano because your fingers are too small. It’s being followed around the store by the salespeople, picking up their negative, suspicious vibe before you even see them. It’s walking down the street with a smile on your face and watching the first white lady you come across tighten the grip on her handbag. It’s standing on the corner when a white person pulls up to the stop sign, sees you and quickly locks all of the doors. It’s seeing black people on the news night after night, in handcuffs, being taken away as criminals. It’s wanting to speak up at work when you see unequal treatment, but knowing you may lose your job if you do. It’s being angry at injustice, but being told to shut up and forget about the past, like it has nothing to do with the present.