Random thoughts...

[shart_attack]

I had a strange dream last night about Aubrey O'Day in a pink thong.

 

[Pennywise]

I had a strange dream last night about Aubrey O'Day in a pink thong.

Me too, except it was Audie Murphy in assless chaps.

 

[norwegen]

When you're taking a test that you know you're going to fail anyway, write an essay on the benefits of quoting Shakespeare to a hedgehog, or of owning a brachiosaurus.

 

[Pennywise]

Why do some farts smell like potato chips, and others smell like boiled eggs?

 

[shart_attack]

Why don't the narcotic painkillers they give my dogs do the same things for me that they do for them?

 

[norwegen]

Why do some farts smell like potato chips, and others smell like boiled eggs?

The best sound effects that a cologne can have are the sound effects of colon cologne.

 

[Pennywise]

Benny Hill died a sad lonely death. Ironic.

 

[shart_attack]

Sure would be nice if elementary schools would let guys train some of the boys destined one day to join biker gangs — you know, the way the US military grooms them through the Boy Scouts.

 

[Pennywise]

CADDYSHACK is not that funny of a film. And THE BLUES BROTHERS is possibly the most overrated cult film ever. And, Qeuntin Tarrantino is a shitty verbose writer.

 

[Pennywise]

Sure would be nice if elementary schools would let guys train some of the boys destined one day to join biker gangs — you know, the way the US military grooms them through the Boy Scouts.

They do, they send them to VoTech schools when they're older.

 

[shart_attack]

CADDYSHACK is not that funny of a film. And THE BLUES BROTHERS is possibly the most overrated cult film ever. And, Qeuntin Tarrantino is a shitty verbose writer.

He'd be okay in my book if only he'd licked Salma Hayek's boots.

 

[shart_attack]

I like to think of a volcano's erupting as the earth's farting.

 

[Pennywise]

CADDYSHACK is not that funny of a film. And THE BLUES BROTHERS is possibly the most overrated cult film ever. And, Qeuntin Tarrantino is a shitty verbose writer.

He'd be okay in my book if only he'd licked Salma Hayek's boots.

I loathe almost everything he ever did, except for the Dennis Hopper/Christopher Walken scene in TRUE ROMANCE. But I give most of the credit there to amazing actors.

 

[Pennywise]

Fried onions and potatoes are delicious and really unhealthy.

 

[Pennywise]

Fit women are hot, but rock hard six pack abs on a woman is grotesque.

 

[Pennywise]

E-readers are lame and in fact the reader retains less information with them than using a printed book. Fact.

 

[Pennywise]

Life was more interesting when you had to go the library to find information. Card catalogs are cool.

 

[Pennywise]

Not many people keep iodine in their medicine cabinets anymore.

 

[Pennywise]

John Wayne Gacy was a staunch democrat, all the time that he was raping and murdering young boys.

 

[Pennywise]

M*A*S*H wins the PENNYWISE AWARD for the most insipid show ever on television to become a blockbuster hit. Once Trapper, Henry and Frank Burns left, the writing was painfully patronizing. Haykeye and BJ fighting each other over who could deliver the most clever one-liners.