beautress
Always Faithful
I don't know. The only one I knew while we lived in Wyoming was gracious and kindly. She was the one that told me (and it's true) that tea tastes better if you use just a little bit of sugar in it. (We were using heaping spoonsful of it in ours before that.) Her name was Elaine, and her husband's name was Andy. I didn't hear they had transferred until a month after they were gone. I hadn't had time to tell her my daughter's middle name was given to be Elaine after her. Seems he was in oil and uranium, but she was as proper as royalty, imho, and a very lovely person. I never heard if they stayed back east where they relocated or found their way back home to Great Britain.Not your fault. I was just obsessing because his life on this planet was not a good one for him. He was born with a birth defect my sister would not discuss. She drank, she smoked, she did drugs, but no matter what I loved her to pieces. She died 3 years ago, and her son disappeared on and off. One day out of the blue about a year ago, I got a call to his house and met his wife of 2 years. She seemed such a sweetie. They met when he began caring for her and had been acquainted in elementary school. They fell in love, but he continued getting a salary from a care giver's outfit for continuing his work, even after they got married. Even so, there are things about marriage that stress some people, and on a scale of 1 to 10, he suddenly became a 9. He tried to explain it to me a week before he passed away, but I just told him marriage had times you needed to adjust. On Feb 8 his wife called and said he was having seizures. Since my sister never discussed his issues, I was unaware of his history of seizures from an early age on. His dad passed away about 6 years ago, and my sister, 3 years ago. She had been his anchor, but he was offish by adulthood and as many times as I offered him help, he disappeared with no forwarding address, no phone calls, nothing. I was looking forward to spending time with him and his wife for life, when her call came. I went because she said I would be the only one to convince him to get into the ambulance. So I dropped everything and flew over there to find him writhing on the floor with a terrible full-body seizure, and reassured him the ambulance people were there to make sure he was okay, so he started cooperating enough to get him on a guerney, although he was visibly unhappy and looked terrorized. I followed his ambulance to the hospital with his wife in the car. When we got there they soon made it known they did not have the facilities to help his problem and airlifted him to a hospital nearby that did. So, again, we got into the car and followed the freeway to the hospital that was about 35 miles away. It was a long night, but it was already early in the morning, and relatives were called and drove the distance to the hospital. I spent a lot of time in his room, bemoaning about not listening to him more carefully, but thinking all along he would get better. What I didn't know is that the machines were all that were between him and the grave. I thought up to the time the family voted to remove the life-saving equipment, that he would make a miraculous recovery and we could look into why he was convulsing so strangely. I was holding his hand to give him courage when they removed the tubes, but instead of opening his eyes and blinking hope back to us, he flatlined in less than 5 minutes.
I'm sorry Miss Beau, I hadn't meant to remind you of that. I am so sorry
I was being a bit facetious and sarcastic and trying to hide it in a more CS appropriate way toward 2 of those that I have to be nice too. Cause anywhere else on this board, it would have ended a bit differently.
When you said full moon, I had been trying to remember when he passed away, had found out it was Feb. 9, and I knew when I drove home it was a full moon light which was helpful to my return trip home. I looked it up online, and it was Feb 8, and it was bright when we made our trip to the hospital because of the full moon. Then I called up his wife, and she confirmed it was Feb. 9 when he passed. Having nothing better to do, I came back here, and noticed the words "full moon." the same day. I was obsessing about if I had done this or known that or questioned my sister more about him while she was still living--you know, the coulda woulda shoulda routine.
So I'm sorry if you're feeling liable but it's my fault to have been obsessing. I just didn't deal with it well because i was probably the only one there who was absolutely sure he'd bounce right back into life when they removed the tubes. My cousin said quite plainly there was no hope for him before or after the tubes were taken out. Derr. I just kept on thinking he'd bounce back. Didn't happen. It's nobody's fault.
Please forgive me, J.A.N. You have never been anything but kind and thoughtful to everyone here. If anyone is to blame it is on me for obsessing over something no one alive had anything to do with. They were just keeping him alive with machines. The damages his extreme seizures caused were irreversible. He seized horrendously nonstop all night and all day and had seized 3 or 4 times while we were discussing whether to remove the tubes or not. The nurses and doctor were recommending withdrawing the tubes. When your life is over, it's over. People in the ER are skilled in their practice of dealing with people on the edge between life and death and have a good series of tests that determine whether there's hope or not and the percentages were one in a million. That's bad odds, and I was deaf to bad odds.
Worked on a quilt this afternoon, and am getting back to it. Everything is lime and dark green, the color of life and growth. Our sorrows define how wonderful good times are. A toast to your good and beneficent life, J.A.N., Foxy, and all who come here and share stuff, good and bad.
To life and good stuff.
Indeed. So much death, sadness, marriages breaking down, you name it.
Let the good times return.
The British are not as forthcoming about their emotions as the Americans. They say that's why the Coronavirus is more contained.They don't hug all that much.
