Bullying does not lead to suicide

[Sunshine]

It is never the bullies who get in trouble. Have you noticed that? If a child brings a weapon to school and says he brought it because other pupils have threatened him or there is someone he is afraid of, that never gets investigated. The kid who is in daily fear of his life is the one who gets punished. I think schools are scraping the bottom of the barrel for teachers and administrators. But then they have been for more than half a century. Anyone with enough sense to be a teacher has enough sense to be something else.

I will admit that I was a bit of a bully in high school (I know, a real shocker.)

I really wasn't that bad, and tended to bully more on peer pressure than because it was my natural way. but I did bully kids. Most kids in high school were smaller and weaker than I. And I was an athlete. The Wrestling Team was especially bad, we did pick on others - I honestly wasn't the instigator, but I went along with it.

I never really thought about it much until much later in life, when my youngest daughter confided in my that she contemplated suicide because she was bullied so much in high school. THEN I finally pondered my own behavior back in the day - and wasn't very proud of it.

I saw Bette Midler on a talk show several years back. She told of her group bullying a little Japanese boy in school. Once day they locked him inside an old trunk and left him there several hours before letting him out. She cried when she told that he suicide right after that. I think anyone who has bullied a child/adolescent to the point of suicide they should do some very serious soul searching. Clearly she had.

At some point people really should contemplate their own behavior. There was a group of boys who were not very nice to me in grade school. I wouldn't call their behavior actual bullying like they do today, but they set out to upset me every day and when they did it was mission accomplished. It took a couple years to learn that if I just laughed at them they would stop because they weren't getting the gratification. And to their amazement I wouldn't date ANY of them in high school~! Now they are super nice all the time and are all FB friends. One of them attends church where my brother goes and asks about me every week. I think it is their guilty consciences at work on them.

 

[lakeview]

There was a group of boys who were not very nice to me in grade school. I wouldn't call their behavior actual bullying like they do today, but they set out to upset me every day and when they did it was mission accomplished.

I just need to check that you did eventually figure out that the reason they did that to you is because at least one of those boys liked you, right?

 

[Sunshine]

There was a group of boys who were not very nice to me in grade school. I wouldn't call their behavior actual bullying like they do today, but they set out to upset me every day and when they did it was mission accomplished.

I just need to check that you did eventually figure out that the reason they did that to you is because at least one of those boys liked you, right?

Actually, they all did. But by the time they could do anything different, they were SOL!

 

[Vox]

If you want to stop bullying in schools - you have to put adults responsible for the school to be responsible for the bullying. it will all but disappear.
the reason bullying got so evil is that the adults got totally off any responsibility for it.
Which was not the situation in 70s or 80s.

I don't know where you went to school but let me assure you that bullying was alive and well at the schools I went to in the '70's and '80's. Adults didn't get involved in what they saw as something kids needed to work out for themselves and really the only thing that would bring adult intervention was the lesson being interrupted, the drawing of blood or a clear winner and loser of a fight...that was pretty much it.

I was not talking about bullying. I was talking about the adult's response to it. It was different then. I t was not total ignoring or punishing BOTH the victim and the perpetrator as it is now.
Bullying exists and always will. But it can be limited and it is the adults role to do so.

 

[BlackSand]

I was not talking about bullying. I was talking about the adult's response to it. It was different then. I t was not total ignoring or punishing BOTH the victim and the perpetrator as it is now.
Bullying exists and always will. But it can be limited and it is the adults role to do so.

I cannot disagree with your premise here ... But I think it comes from social engineering, and the lack of a desire to take sides in anything.

As short of a time ago as when my Grandfather was alive ... He would have snatched someone up whether or not it was his child ... And dragged them down the street squealing if they were abusing others.
But then again, that was back in the day when even ... "Shut up and do as you are told" ... was still considered an acceptable answer.

.

 

[lakeview]

I was not talking about bullying. I was talking about the adult's response to it. It was different then. I t was not total ignoring or punishing BOTH the victim and the perpetrator as it is now.
Bullying exists and always will. But it can be limited and it is the adults role to do so.

When and where did you go to school? When I went to school (in the 1970's and '80's) adults did everything they could not to get involved and only intervened when they had absolutely no choice. When they did get involved both students involved in a fight were punished because fighting was against the rules, it didn't matter who started it. The adults in the schools back then definitely copped out at least as bad as you're saying the adults today do.

 

[GHook93]

I have said this before, and will say it again, the problem is not that teens are bullies, the problem is that some of them need help they are not getting.

All suicides are tragic and complicated. And teen suicides are particularly devastating because as adults we recognize all that lost potential.
Yet, in perpetuating these stories, which are often little more than emotional linkbait, journalists are complicit in a gross oversimplification of a complicated phenomenon. In short, we’re getting the facts wrong.
The common narrative goes like this: Mean kids, usually the most popular and powerful, single out and relentlessly bully a socially weaker classmate in a systemic and calculated way, which then drives the victim into a darkness where he or she sees no alternative other than committing suicide.
And yet experts – those who study suicide, teen behavior and the dynamics of cyber interactions of teens – all say that the facts are rarely that simple. And by repeating this inaccurate story over and over, journalists are harming the public’s ability to understand the dynamics of both bullying and suicide.

Bullying is not on the rise and it does not lead to suicide | Poynter.

I wholeheartedly disagree. Bullying alone doesn't directly lead to suicide, because a TON more kids are bullied then commit suicide or mass killings. However, bullying contributes greatly to a child's mood, attitude and self-esteem. If a child is getting bullied relentlessly at school and then at home via social media, it will have a great negative effect on that kid's mood, attitude and self-esteem. Most children overcome it, but some harm themself and even other's harm others before they harm themself.

Bullying is nearly ALWAYS a symptom when a child commits suicide or goes on a mass shooting.

 

[GHook93]

I didn't read every post but bullying today is completely different from bullying when i was a kid.

I got bullied a bit in grade school but when school was over I got away from it until the next day or for a weekend.

Today with social media bullying isn't as easy to get away from. That constant pressure and stress has to be taken into consideration.

Very true, the bullied kid gets a break and safe haven if you wish. Now their can be texts, FB posts etc that continue the bullying. However, even with the break bullying back then could be just as harmful.

 

[Quantum Windbag]

In the windbag world there is no "cause and effect."

A group of sociopath kids can pick out the smallest, most vulnerable kid they can find, torment this kid 24/7. on line, in person, at school events, everywhere they can torment and bully. And when the bullied kid has finally had enough, done what they could to stop the bullying, gives up and then kills themselves, wacked out fuckers like a windbag decides it ain't the bullies fault. Fuk you windbag.

I had a kid being bullied. I went to the school, demanded that I get to talk to both the kids and the kids parents. When the asst. Principal KNEW what I was going to do, he handled it himself. Immediately. Now those kids might have kept on bullying some other kid. But they sure as fuk didn't bully mine anymore.

You were a bully weren't you windbag? Got your ass kicked for doing it didn't you windbag. Fuk yea you got your ass kicked.

In the real world people are not controlled by others.

 

[Asclepias]

In the windbag world there is no "cause and effect."

A group of sociopath kids can pick out the smallest, most vulnerable kid they can find, torment this kid 24/7. on line, in person, at school events, everywhere they can torment and bully. And when the bullied kid has finally had enough, done what they could to stop the bullying, gives up and then kills themselves, wacked out fuckers like a windbag decides it ain't the bullies fault. Fuk you windbag.

I had a kid being bullied. I went to the school, demanded that I get to talk to both the kids and the kids parents. When the asst. Principal KNEW what I was going to do, he handled it himself. Immediately. Now those kids might have kept on bullying some other kid. But they sure as fuk didn't bully mine anymore.

You were a bully weren't you windbag? Got your ass kicked for doing it didn't you windbag. Fuk yea you got your ass kicked.

In the real world people are not controlled by others.

You are very confused. Most people are controlled by others.

 

[Quantum Windbag]

In the windbag world there is no "cause and effect."

A group of sociopath kids can pick out the smallest, most vulnerable kid they can find, torment this kid 24/7. on line, in person, at school events, everywhere they can torment and bully. And when the bullied kid has finally had enough, done what they could to stop the bullying, gives up and then kills themselves, wacked out fuckers like a windbag decides it ain't the bullies fault. Fuk you windbag.

I had a kid being bullied. I went to the school, demanded that I get to talk to both the kids and the kids parents. When the asst. Principal KNEW what I was going to do, he handled it himself. Immediately. Now those kids might have kept on bullying some other kid. But they sure as fuk didn't bully mine anymore.

You were a bully weren't you windbag? Got your ass kicked for doing it didn't you windbag. Fuk yea you got your ass kicked.

In the real world people are not controlled by others.

You are very confused. Most people are controlled by others.

Unless you can prove that you are a puppet, which shouldn't be hard if it is true, you are full of it.

 

[Asclepias]

Suicide is an act or event not a condition. People react differently to bullying based on their sense of self worth. Low self worth and bullying can cause someone to commit suicide. bullying is a factor in some suicides. To claim its not a factor is being deliberately stupid.

 

[Asclepias]

In the real world people are not controlled by others.

You are very confused. Most people are controlled by others.

Unless you can prove that you are a puppet, which shouldn't be hard if it is true, you are full of it.

I just did. I deliberately made you respond.

 

[Quantum Windbag]

You are very confused. Most people are controlled by others.

Unless you can prove that you are a puppet, which shouldn't be hard if it is true, you are full of it.

I just did. I deliberately made you respond.

That proves that you are a puppet?

DAYAM

 

[Asclepias]

Unless you can prove that you are a puppet, which shouldn't be hard if it is true, you are full of it.

I just did. I deliberately made you respond.

That proves that you are a puppet?

DAYAM

It proves I controlled you.

 

[Vox]

I was not talking about bullying. I was talking about the adult's response to it. It was different then. I t was not total ignoring or punishing BOTH the victim and the perpetrator as it is now.
Bullying exists and always will. But it can be limited and it is the adults role to do so.

When and where did you go to school? When I went to school (in the 1970's and '80's) adults did everything they could not to get involved and only intervened when they had absolutely no choice. When they did get involved both students involved in a fight were punished because fighting was against the rules, it didn't matter who started it. The adults in the schools back then definitely copped out at least as bad as you're saying the adults today do.

I went to school in a different country.

 

[Vox]

I was not talking about bullying. I was talking about the adult's response to it. It was different then. I t was not total ignoring or punishing BOTH the victim and the perpetrator as it is now.
Bullying exists and always will. But it can be limited and it is the adults role to do so.

I cannot disagree with your premise here ... But I think it comes from social engineering, and the lack of a desire to take sides in anything.

As short of a time ago as when my Grandfather was alive ... He would have snatched someone up whether or not it was his child ... And dragged them down the street squealing if they were abusing others.
But then again, that was back in the day when even ... "Shut up and do as you are told" ... was still considered an acceptable answer.

.

yep. that was the attitude.

 

[Politico]

Ahh the good old days.

 

[Katzndogz]

In the good old days, the one being bullied would learn how to fight and kick the bully's ass. Or, maybe an older brother would do it.

 

[Uncensored2008]

In the good old days, the one being bullied would learn how to fight and kick the bully's ass. Or, maybe an older brother would do it.

Or the bully would be bigger and stronger and and continue to bully without end.