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If she isn't getting enough, eventually she's going to get it somewhere else.... is it ever OK to totally cut your spouse off from sex?
Is it even OK to say "no" more often than yes?
What if your spouse has a high sex drive and you don't.....
There's plenty of fish in the sea.
Yes, one is always free to choose when and who to give her body to. However, if one is in a loving, committed relationship, it becomes about WE, not about ME. I give it up when I'm not in the mood, and he gives it up when he's not in the mood. I launder his stinky socks, and he takes out the stinky trash. We all do what we'd rather not and we do it because we love our spouses. We want them to be happy and fulfilled, just as they want us to be happy and fulfilled.
Granny always said never to deny sex to husband. It only takes a minute and it makes them so happy. LOL
Personally, a fulfilling sex life makes him more protective, attentive and it makes him feel like I'm really his (not as a possession). Letting this part of the marriage slip away out of apathy whittles away at the bond until you are merely roommates ... and we all know how annoying roommates are.
If I am in pain, I say so and no. If he's just been a total ass, I say so and no. Otherwise, I am receptive and enthusiastic (even if I am not). No man feels good about sex after an eyeroll, "Fine!" or similar.
That makes no sense at all. If someone is disinterested in sex and happy in their disinterest, why would they want to change it?Then it is time to begin a self-improvement program of exercise, diet, and counseling.I went for "other" because of the verb "deny". That implies it's a commodity to be traded for a price. Sex is supposed to be a consensual gig. If it's done as a favor, such as "I'll mow your lawn while you're on vacation", then it has no meaning.
what if you grow "disinterested" in sex, and no amount of counseling has helped?
Or, bite the bullet. The marriage is over.Tipsy, I agree if you are single. If you have, however, a spouse who wants an active sex life, then I think an issue of reciprocity needs to be negotiated.
OK.Or, bite the bullet. The marriage is over.Tipsy, I agree if you are single. If you have, however, a spouse who wants an active sex life, then I think an issue of reciprocity needs to be negotiated.
Oh, honey, the road does not go where you live, does it?Yes, one is always free to choose when and who to give her body to. However, if one is in a loving, committed relationship, it becomes about WE, not about ME. I give it up when I'm not in the mood, and he gives it up when he's not in the mood. I launder his stinky socks, and he takes out the stinky trash. We all do what we'd rather not and we do it because we love our spouses. We want them to be happy and fulfilled, just as they want us to be happy and fulfilled.
Granny always said never to deny sex to husband. It only takes a minute and it makes them so happy. LOL
Personally, a fulfilling sex life makes him more protective, attentive and it makes him feel like I'm really his (not as a possession). Letting this part of the marriage slip away out of apathy whittles away at the bond until you are merely roommates ... and we all know how annoying roommates are.
If I am in pain, I say so and no. If he's just been a total ass, I say so and no. Otherwise, I am receptive and enthusiastic (even if I am not). No man feels good about sex after an eyeroll, "Fine!" or similar.
What a load of new age horse shit. "It's about we, not me", blah blah blah. Marriage is nothing but a contractual relationship created for the transfer of wealth and to legitimate children. All of the extra touchy/feely shit has only been added in recent years (in a historical context).
Historically, the husband is going to fuck, be it with his wife or mistress. The wife's withholding of sex was of no consequence. Today, with the removal of the primary motivation for marriage (i.e., wealth transfer), there is no utility served by marriage except control (you can legitimate a child by judicial decree). You can get plenty (or more) sex outside of marriage. Given the erosion of the control factor (everybody cheats) and the further perversion of historical marriage by allowing homo union, the days of marriage in the western world are numbered.
That makes no sense at all. If someone is disinterested in sex and happy in their disinterest, why would they want to change it?Then it is time to begin a self-improvement program of exercise, diet, and counseling.I went for "other" because of the verb "deny". That implies it's a commodity to be traded for a price. Sex is supposed to be a consensual gig. If it's done as a favor, such as "I'll mow your lawn while you're on vacation", then it has no meaning.
what if you grow "disinterested" in sex, and no amount of counseling has helped?
I go through this all the time and it is certainly bewildering to say the least.
If someone is not in the mood they won't enjoy it. If she gives it up anyway then you're just masterbating with her body, and that's not right.
I look at it in this subjective moral value and fashion, a lack of sex is grounds for annulment of even a sacred Religious marriage.... is it ever OK to totally cut your spouse off from sex?
Is it even OK to say "no" more often than yes?
What if your spouse has a high sex drive and you don't.....
What happens is, the disinterested partner is put in the position of always acting, always faking, bears the entire burden of sacrifice. No one can do this for any length of time. It will only end up in a resentment that will make them both crazy.That makes no sense at all. If someone is disinterested in sex and happy in their disinterest, why would they want to change it?Then it is time to begin a self-improvement program of exercise, diet, and counseling.I went for "other" because of the verb "deny". That implies it's a commodity to be traded for a price. Sex is supposed to be a consensual gig. If it's done as a favor, such as "I'll mow your lawn while you're on vacation", then it has no meaning.
what if you grow "disinterested" in sex, and no amount of counseling has helped?
I go through this all the time and it is certainly bewildering to say the least.
It's a problem if one person is happy with no sex, but the other partner isn't.
It's a partnership - compromises and sacrifices SHOULD be made (have to be made) for it to be mutually satisfying and beneficial....
But the disinterested party should leave. Hanging around makes them the fraud.What happens is, the disinterested partner is put in the position of always acting, always faking, bears the entire burden of sacrifice. No one can do this for any length of time. It will only end up in a resentment that will make them both crazy.
What happens is, the disinterested partner is put in the position of always acting, always faking, bears the entire burden of sacrifice. No one can do this for any length of time. It will only end up in a resentment that will make them both crazy.That makes no sense at all. If someone is disinterested in sex and happy in their disinterest, why would they want to change it?Then it is time to begin a self-improvement program of exercise, diet, and counseling.I went for "other" because of the verb "deny". That implies it's a commodity to be traded for a price. Sex is supposed to be a consensual gig. If it's done as a favor, such as "I'll mow your lawn while you're on vacation", then it has no meaning.
what if you grow "disinterested" in sex, and no amount of counseling has helped?
I go through this all the time and it is certainly bewildering to say the least.
It's a problem if one person is happy with no sex, but the other partner isn't.
It's a partnership - compromises and sacrifices SHOULD be made (have to be made) for it to be mutually satisfying and beneficial....
I look at it in this subjective moral value and fashion, a lack of sex is grounds for annulment of even a sacred Religious marriage.... is it ever OK to totally cut your spouse off from sex?
Is it even OK to say "no" more often than yes?
What if your spouse has a high sex drive and you don't.....
Thus, a true help-meet may never deny and disparage the Person she has a for-Cause relationship with, regardless of all of the other ones.
... is it ever OK to totally cut your spouse off from sex?
........
Other: The role of a woman in marriage is to please her Husband, so it is not appropriate for her to deny him. However, since the act is about His pleasure not hers, He is free to choose when He is and is not interested.
I went for "other" because of the verb "deny". That implies it's a commodity to be traded for a price. Sex is supposed to be a consensual gig. If it's done as a favor, such as "I'll mow your lawn while you're on vacation", then it has no meaning.
what if you grow "disinterested" in sex, and no amount of counseling has helped?
