Is It OK to Deny Sex to your Spouse?

[Bonzi]

If hubby wants something else, I am not stopping him.
I'm not the jealous type, and if he happens to not be satisfied, he can go elsewhere.
People make this stuff TOO complicate

It comes to the imagined "ownership" of somebody else's body. So called cheating... Now, I was very jealous when I got married so I am not throwing rocks; they might bounce back and hit me in the head.

I used to be jealous to the extreme
Now I am not jealous, to the extreme
Too much pain.

 

[Bonzi]

True. Many say they would rather have an average girl with a sexy attitude than a hot girl that is doesn't have sexy attitude.

How about t hot woman with sexy attitude?

Well that is every man's dream, no?

 

[defcon4]

I used to be jealous to the extreme
Now I am not jealous, to the extreme
Too much pain.

uh...if I just could soothe that pain.....only as a humanitarian, of course

 

[defcon4]

Well that is every man's dream, no?

I cannot speak for all men, especially nowadays. Who knows what some men think?

 

[Bonzi]

I used to be jealous to the extreme
Now I am not jealous, to the extreme
Too much pain.

uh...if I just could soothe that pain.....only as a humanitarian, of course

oh lord you are starting to sound like danielapalos! Even so, I still love ya baby

 

[Bonzi]

Well that is every man's dream, no?

I cannot speak for all men, especially nowadays. Who knows what some men think?

Even if they tell you, who knows

 

[defcon4]

oh lord you are starting to sound like danielapalos! Even so, I still love ya baby

That was cruel but I take it from you since you said it with love..

 

[Bonzi]

Well that is every man's dream, no?

I cannot speak for all men, especially nowadays. Who knows what some men think?

you're so cute.. how an any woman resist???

 

[Bonzi]

oh lord you are starting to sound like danielapalos! Even so, I still love ya baby

That was cruel but I take it from you since you said it with love..

.... always...

 

[defcon4]

Uh...I am not vying for anybody's attention but yours...

 

[Bonzi]

Uh...I am not vying for anybody's attention but yours...

I'm here...

 

[defcon4]

Thank you!!!!

 

[Pogo]

If hubby wants something else, I am not stopping him.
I'm not the jealous type, and if he happens to not be satisfied, he can go elsewhere.
People make this stuff TOO complicate

It comes to the imagined "ownership" of somebody else's body. So called cheating... Now, I was very jealous when I got married so I am not throwing rocks; they might bounce back and hit me in the head.

I used to be jealous to the extreme
Now I am not jealous, to the extreme
Too much pain.

I believe every relationship brings its own unique dynamic. Jealousy/possessiveness is usually a product of that particular combination. That anxiety is a collaboration the two partners create together -- one doing the jealosizing, the other fueling and facilitating it. Change the partner, and that jealousy can mysteriously vanish.

 

[Bonzi]

If hubby wants something else, I am not stopping him.
I'm not the jealous type, and if he happens to not be satisfied, he can go elsewhere.
People make this stuff TOO complicate

It comes to the imagined "ownership" of somebody else's body. So called cheating... Now, I was very jealous when I got married so I am not throwing rocks; they might bounce back and hit me in the head.

I used to be jealous to the extreme
Now I am not jealous, to the extreme
Too much pain.

I believe every relationship brings its own unique dynamic. Jealousy/possessiveness is usually a product of that particular combination. That anxiety is a collaboration the two partners create together -- one doing the jealosizing, the other fueling and facilitating it. Change the partner, and that jealousy can mysteriously vanish.

I was pretty much jealous with ever partner I had - until I learned to disconnect.
Everyone is different. Sometimes, there is just no explanation (or cure).

 

[Pogo]

If hubby wants something else, I am not stopping him.
I'm not the jealous type, and if he happens to not be satisfied, he can go elsewhere.
People make this stuff TOO complicate

It comes to the imagined "ownership" of somebody else's body. So called cheating... Now, I was very jealous when I got married so I am not throwing rocks; they might bounce back and hit me in the head.

I used to be jealous to the extreme
Now I am not jealous, to the extreme
Too much pain.

I believe every relationship brings its own unique dynamic. Jealousy/possessiveness is usually a product of that particular combination. That anxiety is a collaboration the two partners create together -- one doing the jealosizing, the other fueling and facilitating it. Change the partner, and that jealousy can mysteriously vanish.

I was pretty much jealous with ever partner I had - until I learned to disconnect.
Everyone is different. Sometimes, there is just no explanation (or cure).

I would submit that perhaps you kept picking partners that you could be jealous of. However unconsciously.

 

[Bonzi]

If hubby wants something else, I am not stopping him.
I'm not the jealous type, and if he happens to not be satisfied, he can go elsewhere.
People make this stuff TOO complicate

It comes to the imagined "ownership" of somebody else's body. So called cheating... Now, I was very jealous when I got married so I am not throwing rocks; they might bounce back and hit me in the head.

I used to be jealous to the extreme
Now I am not jealous, to the extreme
Too much pain.

I believe every relationship brings its own unique dynamic. Jealousy/possessiveness is usually a product of that particular combination. That anxiety is a collaboration the two partners create together -- one doing the jealosizing, the other fueling and facilitating it. Change the partner, and that jealousy can mysteriously vanish.

I was pretty much jealous with ever partner I had - until I learned to disconnect.
Everyone is different. Sometimes, there is just no explanation (or cure).

I would submit that perhaps you kept picking partners that you could be jealous of. However unconsciously.

In my mind, I don't think so.

I believe I just fictionalized their attraction to others, or maybe I was too aware of it - or had unrealistic expectations (too many movies, fictional ideals of "true love" etc.)

 

[Pete7469]

If someone is not in the mood they won't enjoy it. If she gives it up anyway then you're just masterbating with her body, and that's not right.

 

[Buzz Jenkins]

Denying fuck to your spouse is grounds for divorce.

 

[Muhammed]

... is it ever OK to totally cut your spouse off from sex?
Is it even OK to say "no" more often than yes?
What if your spouse has a high sex drive and you don't.....

If she isn't getting enough, eventually she's going to get it somewhere else.

There's plenty of fish in the sea.

 

[JakeStarkey]

I went for "other" because of the verb "deny". That implies it's a commodity to be traded for a price. Sex is supposed to be a consensual gig. If it's done as a favor, such as "I'll mow your lawn while you're on vacation", then it has no meaning.

what if you grow "disinterested" in sex, and no amount of counseling has helped?

Then it is time to begin a self-improvement program of exercise, diet, and counseling.