The gift of self-hatred...from feminism to your daughter

[DOTR]

 

[DOTR]

Don't worry liberals...big monopolistic corporations like google are watching out for you to make sure no unapproved ideas slip out. It's for your own good. Really.

Using technology to address gender bias in film | Google

 

[EverCurious]

I used to climb trees in the pretty little dresses my Mother put on me. She wanted me to be a model, I have a mole on my cheek and she was sure I was going to be the next Monroe. I can't even count how many times I came home from running around in the woods and she'd frown at me for having torn my dress or gotten dirty roughhousing with the boys in the neighborhood. It wasn't until I was 15 that I got out of it, by getting a job on a gun range; that was when I picked up archery too. Mommy wanted a sweet princess in a ballgown, instead she got an ice queen in a business suit.

Its maybe not fair, but I blame my Mother constantly wanting to dress me up like a doll for my alpha dominant nature. Its not a direct line of fault, but its all tied together. Like I enjoy exerting the same power over people as my doctors did, tie them up (physically, mentally, emotionally doesn't matter) and barrage them with questions and demands. I also enjoy getting into arguments with my intimate partners, I think it's because I never could yell at my doctors - they'd corner me and shoot me full of drugs. Nor my Mother - she'd fall apart and bawl (I never yell at my Mother its too painful for her.) Nor my Father - he would lose it and leave the house when I argued with him (he was raised militaristic and my hellion attitude was too much for him to handle, Mother said he wasn't allowed to spank me and I abused the shit out of that knowledge.) Bad traits, especially for relationships - and probably why I'm in a divorce today. When I look back at my life and say what the fuck went wrong with me, like why couldn't I be the doting stay-at-home mom and housewife my first husband wanted? Why couldn't I be the doting housewife my current [ex]husband wanted?

I have deep respect for my mother, but I do believe that she ruined me on a lot of feminine qualities, I cannot help but blame her even though it's not her fault. Affection, cuddling, crying, these are all weak and pathetic, they show a lack of control and power. I will never give up my sense of control and power, not even if it means I lose people I care about because they can't hack standing up to me forever - so many people I was happy to settle down with slip through my fingers. I actually thought my [ex]husband was enough of an narcissistic asshole to handle me for the long hall, but he's fallen before me. Strangely I've found legit anger over it. I threw a tantrum... like a "real" tantrum not just a bunch of retaliatory words and fighting. I put a Dyson handheld through the oven door because I didn't know what else to do to stop feeling powerless. I've never lost control like that before, it was both liberating and scary. Now I have to bury my "feelings" for him even deeper... fight to let them go even though I don't want to. Ironically a lot of work goes into destroying my intimate relationships... (Disclaimer, I have synesthesia so I "feel" in color. I get almost all of the same physical symptoms (tightness of chest and the like,) and about half of the emotion associated chemical releases as "normal folks." There is an "emotion" underneath but it's so deadened and muted that I typically don't even notice it; kind of like a junky who's been doing there drug of choice for a while, it takes more and stronger versions to 'feel' it.)

I've often wondered about the social/cultural factors that made me this way, especially when it comes to the concept of feminism and such. I'm an 'anti-feminist' despite my own inability to walk that walk. I often think the women's movement is one of the worst things to happen to this country, not so much that I think women are not equal to men, or that I think they're not as capable as men, but rather because they abandon their children in a lot of ways. Not saying it's immediate abuse or anything, but I do think it's "harmful." My [ex]husband let himself go to his emotional failings, and now I consider him weak and I can no longer rely on him as my rock in the stormy ocean. He suffered the opposite I guess, his father hated him for "ruining his life" - parents were supposed to divorce but she got pregnant so they had to stay together for "traditional reasons" and his Father treated him like shit, his mother was a sheep who went along with the verbal/emotional abuse... In the end, he, like I, have to keep telling ourselves that we are our own "rock" - because no one else can be; that independence, but it is an angry independence, not a healthy kind... I think in both our cases our parents had failed to teach us healthy gender roles.

What if my Mother had just accepted that I didn't want to be a girly girl maybe things would be different? Maybe I could have those softer feelings and actually have learned to deal with that "vulnerability" without it becoming a threat to my honor and character if I wasn't constantly fighting her wishes for me? If I had learned to be a bit more "dependent" in the feminine sense, would I have such an issue with my [ex]husbands failure to stay strong? Would I have been a more "loving" wife, or at least more committed to the idea of "needing" someone to be there for me? Or is this just who I am and who I will always be; uncaptureable. Is it environment, or is it just human nature?

What I can say is that I feel like my mother's dedication to her career left me abandoned with teachers and doctors who not only had no idea what to do with me, but generically didn't care about me - I was just a pain in the ass student, or a unique patient - a curious subject of study in a quest for knowledge - just like my mother was on a quest for money/financial stability/etc - and my Father OCD on a quest for "order" - my [ex]husband's quest for "balance" in his intimate relationships. Mother never taught me the things my [ex]husband needed to stay strong for me/us, she never taught me to love and be loved by my first husband - she never taught me how to be a woman, instead she tried to make me a doll - (models are disgusting people, fake to the core, their covers are thin skin over vile creatures in my experience. MUCH dislike if you can't tell heh)

It's not that I hate my Mother for doing that, not at all, I have a lot of respect for her, she's the smartest person I know and I deeply value her advice and friendship, but at the same time, I feel like her "feminist" ways were just not good for me. I have no doubt that I am one of the most important people in my Mother's world, I have no doubt she would do anything to help me, but I know that she, unwittingly perhaps, put her career before taking care of me, expected other people, strangers, to "teach me," and thus failed in some aspects. I don't resent it, I don't blame her for following her dreams, I don't think it was an intentional thing, but the truth remains.

I think feminism had it's place, allowing women to vote, giving them the legal support to get themselves and their children out of abusive relationships, even giving them legal support for working, however, I often feel like the bad outweighs the good in many ways. Look at the single mother issue among the poor. If we hadn't been pushing the cultural revolution of woman power "don't need a man" bullshit then it would be a social stigma to abandon your wife and kids - such a man would be looked down upon by women and wouldn't be as likely to find anyone but whores to continue their games with. In the end the children would benefit from having both sides of the gender picture; and I think that's important too - a template of sorts to mimic in a way. If one parent was available to keep eyes on the kids we wouldn't have such a big gang and drug problem. If one parent could stay home the economy wouldn't have become a two-income system.

There's a lot of good that came out of women's suffrage, but I also see a lot of bad - and frankly the bad far outweighs the good because, to my eyes, it's causing a cascade failure of society.

 

[Anathema]

OK. My wife is fine with that.

Thats good. Unfortunately, too many of the women I know and work sfound want to hsve their cake and eat it too. Fhey want to be treated like one of the Guys when it's to their advantage but the instant it isn't advantageous, they want to invoke the iddals of "chivalry" or "I'm just a girl" to better their position.

 

[WinterBorn]

DOTR, you have tried to claim that there was a connection between the popularity of tomboys/strong women and the increase in girls wanting gender reassignment. I disagree. And the linked article offered no evidence at all.

But in my last few posts, I used some language that may provide a better answer. I challenged you to "man up". I said you didn't have the balls to answer. And I called you a pussy. These are common terms in our society. You don't think that teaches girls that being a man is better? If you beat someone, they are your bitch. You don't think these are all much more powerful messages than Katniss Everdeen?

If you want to blame someone for girls wanting to be boys, try blaming the boys and men who continually reaffirm that they think men are superior.

Well before we do let's first try not ignoring the old women here who do it. For a feminist it seems there is no greater insult than deeming your opponent to be less than masculine. And the women on this thread have done it constantly. No, I didn't overlook it. I thought it more telling to let it sit. It vividly shows the depth of their self revulsion and their fear of being "out manned".
I noticed your proclivity for it as well. Granted you aimed them at a male which isn't as bad. I happen to agree that femininity in a man is no virtue. But there it is.
Your posts here would make a fine power point explaining the dangers of cognitive dissonance. While virtue signaling your feminist bonavfides you constantly used accusations of femininity as a slur.
Not me. You.
When describing women you excused their feminine qualities (which should never need excusing) by adding masculine qualities.
Not me. You.
I could comfortably describe my daughters as "girly" and not feel I had insulted them. I think it is because I find femininity in women to be quite admirable and worthy in itself and needing no masculine sugar coating to be palatable.

Ann Coultur, brilliant as always, once said "feminism is the hatred of all things feminine".

I don't share their hatred.

As far as your disagreement with Dr Polly Carmichael that's fine. Maybe this mental illness spreading among children is due to something else. But it's one hell of a coincidence if so. And she is the one on the front lines.

BTW I recently read that Jennifer Lawrence, feminist icon and archer superb, says she has been imitating men in her speech to gain confidence. Look it up. I didn't save the article but we live in an amazing age. Search for "Lawrence I watched how men speak " or similar and it should pop up.
Some girl power icon.

Oh, you saw it and decided to let it lie without comment? LMAO!! Suuure you did.

And still you are trying to tell me what I meant? Funny how you tear into my post and hold on to your interpretation like a bulldog, but the much more telling posts...well.....you saw it but let it lie.

You are the one who has a problem with women not being what you want them to be. Not me. You.

You are the one who maligns women for being aggressive. Not me. You.

You are the one who blames the movement that got women the right to vote, the ability to get birth control, the ability to have their own bank accounts and ownership of property, and allowed women to work outside the narrow list of jobs men found suitable for them, on the apparent increase in "tomboys". Not me. You.

YOu are the one who thinks being a tomboy is a bad thing. (I would bet that there are no more tomboys now than before, just that they feel safe enough to express who they are and live like they want) But you think that is bad. Not me. You.

 

[Jarlaxle]

OK. My wife is fine with that.

Thats good. Unfortunately, too many of the women I know and work sfound want to hsve their cake and eat it too. Fhey want to be treated like one of the Guys when it's to their advantage but the instant it isn't advantageous, they want to invoke the iddals of "chivalry" or "I'm just a girl" to better their position.

She is the only woman where she works, does exactly the same job as the men, and drives one of these every day, complete with full air brakes:

 

[Anathema]

She is the only woman where she works, does exactly the same job as the men, and drives one of these every day, complete with full air brakes:

Congrats. Good for her. Sounds like you two make it work very well.

Obviously, you know it wouldn't have worked for me. Then again, I'm not sure how much you would enjoy being in a relationship with a woman like my wife, who is less outgoing and take-charge.

Different viewpoints for different couples.

 

[EverCurious]

That's actually a decent point. Both of my boys have GF's who are painfully shy. As a mother I worry that they are both going to have to work harder to make up for these girl's inability to function in a job and stuff. My eldest is actually moving out of state because they hope it'll be cheaper (son's job has an opening there for him.)

These gals wouldn't make it in the real world without a man to tend to them. It is anti-feminist for my boys to be willing to take on that "dominant male" role or are they doing these gals a service by accepting them despite that fault?

 

[Dragonlady]

As a former "tomboy", it's difficult to believe that ANY competent medical professional would use such a denigrating term in regard to young females. Calling a girl a tomboy is incredibly insulting and demeaning.

Yes tomboys are repulsive. But pushed as the norm by media elites. I'm not sure it's a pejorative though. What term should he have used...something like "masculinized women" or "dykey women" or what?

None of the tomboys I grew up with are masculinized or dykes. We all grew up, got married, most of us had kids. The only childhood friend who came out as a Lesbian was my best friend's sister. She didn't play sports with the rest of us. While we were riding horses and playing sports she was hanging out in the kitchen with her mother.

The "tomboys" all grew up to be straight women. We were all very successful in our chosen fields: one was the head nurse in a big city emergency ward, 2 of us were bank managers, although I became a law clerk in the 1980's, and my best friend was a title searcher/conveyancer who was also a farm wife.

We're all retired now.

 

[Dragonlady]

View attachment 127466

Your ignorance of who are feminists knows no bounds.

Why are YOU so threatened by smart strong women?

 

[WinterBorn]

That's actually a decent point. Both of my boys have GF's who are painfully shy. As a mother I worry that they are both going to have to work harder to make up for these girl's inability to function in a job and stuff. My eldest is actually moving out of state because they hope it'll be cheaper (son's job has an opening there for him.)

These gals wouldn't make it in the real world without a man to tend to them. It is anti-feminist for my boys to be willing to take on that "dominant male" role or are they doing these gals a service by accepting them despite that fault?

I have no problem with women choosing to be taken care of or to stay at home ect. It is when they are required to do so that I take issue.

 

[WinterBorn]

View attachment 127466

Your ignorance of who are feminists knows no bounds.

Why are YOU so threatened by smart strong women?

Good luck getting an answer to that one.

 

[Fenton Lum]

What say we leave it up to the individual females, they can determine that for themselves......

Okay. Just a couple clarifications:

1. They will be expected to compete at the same standard as their biologically Male counterparts.

2. They will not expect any grester form of courtesy be shown to tben by Males than those Males would show to other Males in a similar situation.

3. Any special Rights or Privileges granted to females by society will be withheld from them

If they want to be one of the bots and play with the bots, they have to play by the same rules as the boys.

They have been on the short end of the stick ever since the euro's brought patriarchy to the land mass son.

 

[Fenton Lum]

Funny my wife is a conservative AND did all those things you did AND is a mother of 4 kids and cooks,cleans etc. She is the farthest thing from a femitard as she could be. Oh and she works as well. Feminism is a mental disorder just like liberalism.

We have four kids as well. And my wife does indeed despise liberalism and feminism. She is pretty much an independent thinker...Hollywood propaganda just doesn't sway her.

And that's the prollem with the others, hollywood made them do it.

 

[Fenton Lum]

s

Why are girls looking to swap gender based on a character in the Hunger Games? Katniss Everdeen (Jennifer Lawrence) is pretty hot as a girl and well capable physically. Why the need to swap gender? Just be a girl and do what you want to do. Maybe I shouldn't have asked...

Because youngsters have trouble understanding that its just a movie. That K Everdeen has never fired an arrow offscreen without special effects improving the shot. They are bombarded with this message and they look at themselves and, not being able to karate chop four guys into submission, they feel less than. They have feminine urges and they wonder why they are different (not knowing that it is the masculine women the media presents who are different) and they develop self hatred and self revulsion.
They are taught that only by being manly are they fully human.

No, that what what society and the way it was constructed on the european male dominator god model taught them; partriarchy.

 

[Anathema]

That's actually a decent point. Both of my boys have GF's who are painfully shy. As a mother I worry that they are both going to have to work harder to make up for these girl's inability to function in a job and stuff. My eldest is actually moving out of state because they hope it'll be cheaper (son's job has an opening there for him.)

These gals wouldn't make it in the real world without a man to tend to them. It is anti-feminist for my boys to be willing to take on that "dominant male" role or are they doing these gals a service by accepting them despite that fault?

So you see your potential daughters-in-law as being faulty and blame them for their inability to support themselves? Am I getting that right?, because thsts what I get out of your post.... anger thst your boys might hace to support their potential wife.

 

[Fenton Lum]

What's the matter little man, afraid of strong independent females.
Whine a bit more, just like the whiny little bitch in the whitehouse.

What is a strong independent female? I don't think I've ever met one but doubt they are scary.

They're too intellegent to fuck around with little boys with fragile egos and don't wish to raise you.

 

[Anathema]

They have been on the short end of the stick ever since the euro's brought patriarchy to the land mass son.

So what? Many of us believe that's where they've slways belonged and should still be.

 

[Fenton Lum]

They have been on the short end of the stick ever since the euro's brought patriarchy to the land mass son.

So what? Many of us believe that's where they've slways belonged and should still be.

Thanks, that's the point.

 

[Fenton Lum]

That's actually a decent point. Both of my boys have GF's who are painfully shy. As a mother I worry that they are both going to have to work harder to make up for these girl's inability to function in a job and stuff. My eldest is actually moving out of state because they hope it'll be cheaper (son's job has an opening there for him.)

These gals wouldn't make it in the real world without a man to tend to them. It is anti-feminist for my boys to be willing to take on that "dominant male" role or are they doing these gals a service by accepting them despite that fault?

So you see your potential daughters-in-law as being faulty and blame them for their inability to support themselves? Am I getting that right?, because thsts what I get out of your post.... anger thst your boys might hace to support their potential wife.

Could you get your spelling right? The women can.