Why do women have so many kids with different men?

[ChrisL]

I disagree completely. She cannot get pregnant without the sperm. He is just as responsible, and in the case of teen pregnancy, the MAN is more responsible because he is an adult, and she is a child.

Yes, I am sure on occasion there are women out there who would use a man to become pregnant, but that is quite rare. It is more so the case that men use women for sex. Are you going to say that isn't true?

Sperm banks

How she goes about getting it is 100% her choice

I'm not about to argue that men are worse than woman on the topic.

 

[ChrisL]

People have to take responsibility for themselves (goes both ways, not just for one sex). Just because someone is divorced/single/married fooling around, etc doesn't give them a pass on doing the right thing. Don't want kids? Don't want to take a chance on having one? Don't want the responsibility? Aren't 100% sure that the person that's feeding you a line of BS really means what they say? The answer is simple: Stick to your morals and don't go sleeping around. Of course, some don't have any morals to begin with. If those can't take NO for an answer, then it's the wrong person for you. If those can't understand why another wouldn't want to do what they say, when they say, and how they say, then it's the wrong person.

You bring up a good point here. It seems some are trying to place their morality on those women and make excuses, instead of accepting those woman made their choices. I can respect their right to choose, but I don't have to respect their choices.

It seems to me that some people are trying to lie ALL the blame on the women and excuse the men for their bad behavior, as a "men will be men and women beware" scenario. Well, not all women are smart enough, some are emotionally damaged, etc., so that is just not a realistic viewpoint to hold, IMO.

Actually, it's common sense to be responsible for yourself. Why play Russian Roulette and rely on someone else for your well-being? If you can't take care of yourself, you can't expect anyone else to do that either.

Because some people are going to do these things. Some people do not have good role models in their lives, maybe they were abused, etc.

Again, it is not an ideal world that we live in.

 

[ChrisL]

As a matter of fact, a lot of people who have suffered from abuse act out in a sexual way. A lot of women who were sexually abused will either completely withdraw from sex, or be very promiscuous. Sometimes, although I think it's rare, even young children who were abused will act out in a sexually aggressive manner because they believe this is normal.

I know that's off topic, but it is just one reason to explain promiscuity. Sadly, yes, there are a children out there who do not have very happy or good lives.

 

[AyeCantSeeYou]

People have to take responsibility for themselves (goes both ways, not just for one sex). Just because someone is divorced/single/married fooling around, etc doesn't give them a pass on doing the right thing. Don't want kids? Don't want to take a chance on having one? Don't want the responsibility? Aren't 100% sure that the person that's feeding you a line of BS really means what they say? The answer is simple: Stick to your morals and don't go sleeping around. Of course, some don't have any morals to begin with. If those can't take NO for an answer, then it's the wrong person for you. If those can't understand why another wouldn't want to do what they say, when they say, and how they say, then it's the wrong person.

You bring up a good point here. It seems some are trying to place their morality on those women and make excuses, instead of accepting those woman made their choices. I can respect their right to choose, but I don't have to respect their choices.

It seems to me that some people are trying to lie ALL the blame on the women and excuse the men for their bad behavior, as a "men will be men and women beware" scenario. Well, not all women are smart enough, some are emotionally damaged, etc., so that is just not a realistic viewpoint to hold, IMO.

Actually, it's common sense to be responsible for yourself. Why play Russian Roulette and rely on someone else for your well-being? If you can't take care of yourself, you can't expect anyone else to do that either.

Because some people are going to do these things. Some people do not have good role models in their lives, maybe they were abused, etc.

Being abused is no excuse. Neither is not having role models. That's simply making an excuse for bad behavior.

I know people that were abused and grew up practically raising themselves. None of them have had kids by several different people. In fact, quite a few of them went on to be professors at a local college. One has 3 degrees, another has 2. One got married to a woman that abused him. (He had to leave the area after filing for divorce due to threats from her.)

Point is, making excuses is pretty much writing off someone's behavior just because that person expects it. They're hurting themselves more than they're hurting others.

 

[BlackSand]

The teen is responsible for herself. If she can't say NO, then she'll be dealing with the consequences later. Obviously, she was never taught right from wrong, how to respect herself, and that she doesn't need someone in her life. If she says NO and the other doesn't comply, then she needs to report it as rape ASAP.

I am not giving a teen a pass on responsibility for their actions ... But I can accept that people make mistakes and can learn from them.

The issues discussed had a lot more to do with the idea people keep making the same mistake over and over. Either that is the product of absolute dysfunction associated with a complete lack of moral guidance ... Or the parties involved are intentionally or recklessly negligent.

Consequences are one of the many ways we learn and should become more responsible. Ignoring those consequences and continuing the same behavior is irresponsible.

.

 

[ChrisL]

People have to take responsibility for themselves (goes both ways, not just for one sex). Just because someone is divorced/single/married fooling around, etc doesn't give them a pass on doing the right thing. Don't want kids? Don't want to take a chance on having one? Don't want the responsibility? Aren't 100% sure that the person that's feeding you a line of BS really means what they say? The answer is simple: Stick to your morals and don't go sleeping around. Of course, some don't have any morals to begin with. If those can't take NO for an answer, then it's the wrong person for you. If those can't understand why another wouldn't want to do what they say, when they say, and how they say, then it's the wrong person.

You bring up a good point here. It seems some are trying to place their morality on those women and make excuses, instead of accepting those woman made their choices. I can respect their right to choose, but I don't have to respect their choices.

It seems to me that some people are trying to lie ALL the blame on the women and excuse the men for their bad behavior, as a "men will be men and women beware" scenario. Well, not all women are smart enough, some are emotionally damaged, etc., so that is just not a realistic viewpoint to hold, IMO.

Actually, it's common sense to be responsible for yourself. Why play Russian Roulette and rely on someone else for your well-being? If you can't take care of yourself, you can't expect anyone else to do that either.

Because some people are going to do these things. Some people do not have good role models in their lives, maybe they were abused, etc.

Being abused is no excuse. Neither is not having role models. That's simply making an excuse for bad behavior.

I know people that were abused and grew up practically raising themselves. None of them have had kids by several different people. In fact, quite a few of them went on to be professors at a local college. One has 3 degrees, another has 2. One got married to a woman that abused him. (He had to leave the area after filing for divorce due to threats from her.)

Point is, making excuses is pretty much writing off someone's behavior just because that person expects it. They're hurting themselves more than they're hurting others.

Everyone is different. There are also different levels of abuse. You would only be right if this was an ideal world where everyone is intelligent, thoughtful, not crazy, etc. That is just not the case.

 

[ChrisL]

I only know one woman (that I can think of right now off hand) who has three children from one man and one child from another, but she is still married to her second husband (the father of her three children). He also adopted her other child. I've seen plenty of teens with babies, but it's usually one baby. I think maybe this multiple babies with multiple dads (at least more than just two) is more of an inner city thing where there is a lot of poverty and a lot of problems that go along with it.

Now I have seen the occasional young woman with a whole slew of children, but I cannot say if they are all her children or what the story might be. I would think that would be something you could only know by talking with that person.

 

[R.D.]

I disagree completely. She cannot get pregnant without the sperm. He is just as responsible, and in the case of teen pregnancy, the MAN is more responsible because he is an adult, and she is a child.

Yes, I am sure on occasion there are women out there who would use a man to become pregnant, but that is quite rare. It is more so the case that men use women for sex. Are you going to say that isn't true?

Sperm banks

How she goes about getting it is 100% her choice

I'm not about to argue that men are worse than woman on the topic.

Roll you're eyes then two posts down try abuse as the excuse. Men (boys) are abused too. But it's still a deflection. If an emotion unstable woman isn't wearing a sign you honestly believe the guy is at fault for her actions? Your posts read like you do not give men any credit for anything except being horny and irresponsible.

 

[ChrisL]

I disagree completely. She cannot get pregnant without the sperm. He is just as responsible, and in the case of teen pregnancy, the MAN is more responsible because he is an adult, and she is a child.

Yes, I am sure on occasion there are women out there who would use a man to become pregnant, but that is quite rare. It is more so the case that men use women for sex. Are you going to say that isn't true?

Sperm banks

How she goes about getting it is 100% her choice

I'm not about to argue that men are worse than woman on the topic.

Roll you're eyes then two posts down try abuse as the excuse. Men (boys) are abused too. But it's still a deflection. If an emotion unstable woman isn't wearing a sign you honestly believe the guy is at fault for her actions? Your posts read like you do not give men any credit for anything except being horny and irresponsible.

That's what you are doing to women. Abuse, in one form or another, is a reason why a lot of women are promiscuous. You might not like, you might not believe it, but whatever. Any psychologist will back up my statements. Go check any website.

Also, our women have such role models as Niki Minaj, etc. Yes, teen girls see this. Unless you would keep your teenager locked in his or her room, they are going to be exposed to pop culture. This sends teen girls mixed messages, and sometimes, if they are lacking strong role models (which is more than likely going to be the case with promiscuous girls anyways), then they are more likely to fall into these kinds of behaviors.

Girls who are easily impressionable (which a lot of teens are anyways) will try to emulate what is popular, and especially that which is popular with the boys and what they think the boys might like.

 

[ChrisL]

The boys want to see the girls kiss each other. The boys want to see big butts exposed, twerking, and big huge boobs and cleavage. The girls are well aware of this too. The girls dress like this because they think it attracts boys. Naturally, they think this is what boys want in a girl. I think I would be apt to blame pop culture for promiscuous behavior, especially in teens.

We have women singing songs about taking an "anaconda" up her big butt, and this woman is praised and glorified as "sexy" and she sells music, etc. What are young girls to think about this? And boys too? Girls think the way to be is to "loose" and boys think that girls are whores. This is our legacy. We should be so proud.

 

[R.D.]

That's what you are doing to women. Abuse, in one form or another, is a reason why a lot of women are promiscuous. You might not like, you might not believe it, but whatever. Any psychologist will back up my statements. Go check any website.

So what? As I said, same applies to men. With the exception she gets pregnant and holds that responsibility.

You keep derailing things. For example where was it established these fathers are not present or financially responsible for their children? Its simply your assumption to make the woman somehow victims

Also, our women have such role models as Niki Minaj, etc. Yes, teen girls see this. Unless you would keep your teenager locked in his or her room, they are going to be exposed to pop culture. This sends teen girls mixed messages, and sometimes, if they are lacking strong role models (which is more than likely going to be the case with promiscuous girls anyways), then they are more likely to fall into these kinds of behaviors.

Does the victimhood ever end ?

Girls who are easily impressionable (which a lot of teens are anyways) will try to emulate what is popular, and especially that which is popular with the boys and what they think the boys might like.

I guess not

 

[ChrisL]

That's what you are doing to women. Abuse, in one form or another, is a reason why a lot of women are promiscuous. You might not like, you might not believe it, but whatever. Any psychologist will back up my statements. Go check any website.

So what? As I said, same applies to men. With the exception she gets pregnant and holds that responsibility.

You keep derailing things. For example where was it established these fathers are not present or financially responsible for their children? Its simply your assumption to make the woman somehow victims

Also, our women have such role models as Niki Minaj, etc. Yes, teen girls see this. Unless you would keep your teenager locked in his or her room, they are going to be exposed to pop culture. This sends teen girls mixed messages, and sometimes, if they are lacking strong role models (which is more than likely going to be the case with promiscuous girls anyways), then they are more likely to fall into these kinds of behaviors.

Does the victimhood ever end ?

Girls who are easily impressionable (which a lot of teens are anyways) will try to emulate what is popular, and especially that which is popular with the boys and what they think the boys might like.

I guess not

It's absolutely true, whether you want to acknowledge it or not. If you think that your teenaged children have never heard of Niki Minaj, then, well, LOL. Your children are probably NOT as innocent as you might think they are if they have internet access, access to radio, television, etc.

A lot of kids out there do not have good role models and are not supervised very well, so they will fall into these types of behaviors, and this is just a fact of life. You can acknowledge that or remain blind. Choice is yours.

 

[ChrisL]

Just to make my point, Nicki Minaj was a judge on American Idol too. Lol. Here are the lyrics to her song "Anaconda" below, which I think was #1 on the singles chart for a while. Who do you think is listening to this stuff? Teenagers and people in the early 20s who are into the club scene more than likely. And there is another issue which is completely related and topical, alcohol and substance abuse, clubbing and, as my good friend Sgt Gath would say, the "hook-up" culture here in the United States.

This is all due to societal expectations and culture. I guess that would be an explanation of why so many women AND men are irresponsible with their sexuality.

"Anaconda"

My Anaconda don't...
My Anaconda don't...
My Anaconda don't want none unless you got buns hun

Boy toy named Troy used to live in Detroit
Big dope dealer money, he was getting some coins
Was in shootouts with the law, but he live in a palace
Bought me Alexander McQueen, he was keeping me stylish
Now that's real, real, real,
Gun in my purse, bitch I came dressed to kill
Who wanna go first? I had them pushing daffodils
I'm high as hell, I only took a half of pill
I'm on some dumb shit

By the way, what he say?
He can tell I ain't missing no meals
Come through and fuck 'em in my automobile
Let him eat it with his grills,
He keep telling me to chill
He keep telling me it's real, that he love my sex appeal
Because he don't like 'em boney, he want something he can grab
So I pulled up in the Jag, and i hit 'em with the jab like...
Dun-d-d-dun-dun-d-d-dun-dun

My Anaconda don't...
My Anaconda don't...
My Anaconda don't want none unless you got buns hun

Oh my gosh, look at her butt
Oh my gosh, look at her butt
Oh my gosh, look at her butt
Look at her butt (look at her butt)

This dude named Michael used to ride motorcycles
Dick bigger than a tower, I ain't talking about Eiffel's
Real country ass nigga, let me play with his rifle
Pussy put his ass to sleep, now he calling me NyQuil
Now that bang bang bang,
I let him hit it 'cause he slang Cocaine
He toss my salad like his name Romaine
And when we done, I make him buy me Balmain
I'm on some dumb shit

By the way, what he say?
He can tell I ain't missing no meals
Come through and fuck 'em in my automobile
Let him eat it with his grills,
He keep telling me to chill
He keep telling me it's real, that he love my sex appeal
Because he don't like 'em boney, he want something he can grab
So I pulled up in the Jag, Mayweather with the jab like...
Dun-d-d-dun-dun-d-d-dun-dun

My Anaconda don't...
My Anaconda don't...
My Anaconda don't want none unless you got buns hun

Oh my gosh, look at her butt
Oh my gosh, look at her butt
Oh my gosh, look at her butt
Look at her butt (look at her butt)

Little in the middle but she got much back
Little in the middle but she got much back
Little in the middle but she got much back
Oh my God (look at her butt)

My Anaconda don't...
My Anaconda don't...
My Anaconda don't want none unless you got buns hun

(Don't don't don't) My Anaconda don't...
(Don't don't don't) Don't want none unless you got buns hun

Oh my gosh, look at her butt
Oh my gosh, look at her butt
Oh my gosh, look at her butt

Yeah, he love this fat ass
Yeah! This one is for my bitches with a fat ass in the fucking club
I said, "Where my fat ass big bitches in the club?"
Fuck those skinny bitches,
Fuck those skinny bitches in the club
I wanna see all the big fat ass bitches in the motherfucking club, fuck you if you skinny bitches. What? Yeah!

Yeah. I got a big fat ass. Come on!

 

[R.D.]

That's what you are doing to women. Abuse, in one form or another, is a reason why a lot of women are promiscuous. You might not like, you might not believe it, but whatever. Any psychologist will back up my statements. Go check any website.

So what? As I said, same applies to men. With the exception she gets pregnant and holds that responsibility.

You keep derailing things. For example where was it established these fathers are not present or financially responsible for their children? Its simply your assumption to make the woman somehow victims

Also, our women have such role models as Niki Minaj, etc. Yes, teen girls see this. Unless you would keep your teenager locked in his or her room, they are going to be exposed to pop culture. This sends teen girls mixed messages, and sometimes, if they are lacking strong role models (which is more than likely going to be the case with promiscuous girls anyways), then they are more likely to fall into these kinds of behaviors.

Does the victimhood ever end ?

Girls who are easily impressionable (which a lot of teens are anyways) will try to emulate what is popular, and especially that which is popular with the boys and what they think the boys might like.

I guess not

It's absolutely true, whether you want to acknowledge it or not. If you think that your teenaged children have never heard of Niki Minaj, then, well, LOL. Your children are probably NOT as innocent as you might think they are if they have internet access, access to radio, television, etc.

A lot of kids out there do not have good role models and are not supervised very well, so they will fall into these types of behaviors, and this is just a fact of life. You can acknowledge that or remain blind. Choice is yours.

What are you talking about?

TVs have many channels, the computer is limitless, books come in all genres, radios have tons of stations and fashion has a huge array of styles, schools have many teachers and groups of kids and so on.

My children? Are you sure your not simply projecting here?

 

[ChrisL]

That's what you are doing to women. Abuse, in one form or another, is a reason why a lot of women are promiscuous. You might not like, you might not believe it, but whatever. Any psychologist will back up my statements. Go check any website.

So what? As I said, same applies to men. With the exception she gets pregnant and holds that responsibility.

You keep derailing things. For example where was it established these fathers are not present or financially responsible for their children? Its simply your assumption to make the woman somehow victims

Also, our women have such role models as Niki Minaj, etc. Yes, teen girls see this. Unless you would keep your teenager locked in his or her room, they are going to be exposed to pop culture. This sends teen girls mixed messages, and sometimes, if they are lacking strong role models (which is more than likely going to be the case with promiscuous girls anyways), then they are more likely to fall into these kinds of behaviors.

Does the victimhood ever end ?

Girls who are easily impressionable (which a lot of teens are anyways) will try to emulate what is popular, and especially that which is popular with the boys and what they think the boys might like.

I guess not

It's absolutely true, whether you want to acknowledge it or not. If you think that your teenaged children have never heard of Niki Minaj, then, well, LOL. Your children are probably NOT as innocent as you might think they are if they have internet access, access to radio, television, etc.

A lot of kids out there do not have good role models and are not supervised very well, so they will fall into these types of behaviors, and this is just a fact of life. You can acknowledge that or remain blind. Choice is yours.

What are you talking about?

TVs have many channels, the computer is limitless, books come in all genres, radios have tons of stations and fashion has a huge array of styles, schools have many teachers and groups of kids and so on.

My children? Are you sure your not simply projecting here?

I mean "you" in a general sense. Yes, I agree, but kids tend to go with what is popular. That is WHY they are number one on the billboard charts. If a lot of the kids were not listening to this stuff, then it would not be a number 1 seller. Nicki would NOT be judging on American Idol or receiving MTV awards, etc.

 

[BlackSand]

That's what you are doing to women. Abuse, in one form or another, is a reason why a lot of women are promiscuous. You might not like, you might not believe it, but whatever. Any psychologist will back up my statements. Go check any website.

Give Yourself Credit by Not Blaming Others Psychology Today

How to Take Responsibility Stop Blaming Others Even if Others are to Blame

Who is to blame for the problems in your life

Taking Responsibility Being Responsible Responsible Person accomplishment success happiness irresponsible irresponsibility

Acquire Wisdom and Live with Passion Don t blame others

.

 

[ChrisL]

In a lot of instances, pop culture glorifies the "thug life" and a lot of kids will fall for that as glamorous because they can be very impressionable. That is why they are "children" and not adults, why we don't let them sign contracts, etc., because they can be easily manipulated.

Okay, I'm not saying this is why ALL men and women are sexually irresponsible, but I'm pretty sure that it plays a big role, especially for those kids who do not have any positive role models, have inattentive parents, are neglected or abused, etc. I think it plays a big role in some men and women having the wrong ideas about one another perhaps too.

 

[ChrisL]

That's what you are doing to women. Abuse, in one form or another, is a reason why a lot of women are promiscuous. You might not like, you might not believe it, but whatever. Any psychologist will back up my statements. Go check any website.

Give Yourself Credit by Not Blaming Others Psychology Today

How to Take Responsibility Stop Blaming Others Even if Others are to Blame

Who is to blame for the problems in your life

Taking Responsibility Being Responsible Responsible Person accomplishment success happiness irresponsible irresponsibility

Acquire Wisdom and Live with Passion Don t blame others

.

So you are saying you don't believe pop culture has any impression on kids? Okay. Lol. Also. . .

Promiscuity Avoidance Healing in the Hurting Places

When someone has been sexually abused at an early age, how they view sex becomes altered. Instead of the loving bond between a man and a woman that we have been designed for, that physical union becomes marred with painful memories. How an individual reacts and copes to being exposed to a sexual relationship before they were mature enough to understand and handle it will vary from person to person. Having been violated, often repeatedly against their will, teaches a child that sex is not about love; it is about being used and often treated as an object.

It then becomes easy to see how victims often fall into promiscuity, searching for love in all of the wrong places. Sex no longer holds the value it should; it simply becomes the means to an end. Often the mentality is that the victim is so used to being used, that it doesn’t matter anymore. And they, in turn, will use others, hoping to feel different, but always coming away feeling empty. Some victims say that they just don’t care anymore, having lost something that was once priceless to them.

Promiscuity came mean a string of empty relationships or it may lead to prostitution, working in strip clubs or being hired out as an “escort.” Most women working in strip clubs will attest to being sexually abused as children. With each meaningless sexual act, the victim dies a little more inside, but they are usually too numb to notice. They may become involved in the multi-billion dollar pornography industry and often turn to alcohol and/or drugs to get through each day. Pimps will often prey on runaways, befriending them as they leave bus terminals and train stations, thinking they are getting away from the horrors of their former life, only to be plunged deeper into an unending cycle of being abused and feeling more and more worthless.

 

[High_Gravity]

Show me where I have said men are not responsible, I said they are horney yes, but I never said they bare no responsibility here.

It's implied here:
Thank you and I can tell you from a mans POV, most of the times we just tolerate the rug rats for the sex, thats it. Most of these men are not there to father these kids for the long term.

Here:
Women are the ones who will bare these children and in alot of cases nowadays end up raising them without any male assistance, men should use protection but at the end of the day the burden lays with the female.

And the horndog post.

And? is that incorrect? men have the option to just leave or terminate their parental rights, do the women have that option unless they choose to abort?

It's only acceptable in your world. It lasts only as long as you continue to applaud it. Responsibility works both ways. Excusing responsibility because men are horn dogs is not viable.

Terminating parental rights? No. Not really. The courts usually think that even dickhead dads are still worthy dads. Even if the dad's don't pay child support they cannot be kept from seeing the kids.

My world? these jokers that get the women pregnant can just walk away, I know a girl right now who has 2 kids from her previous marriage and is now pregnant with her third child from a new boyfriend, well the boyfriend has decided he wants no part of this and hes gone, now this young lady is stuck with 2 young girls and a third child on the way with no help, she can file for child support sure, but the guy is just not interested. This happens all the time in America now, if the man really doesn't care besides a cut out of his check, the child is not a real burden on his life.

But, hey you'll tolerate those rugrats for the sex, amiright?

Do you want me to list the situations and people I know? We all know someone or some situation.

This is not a new phenomena, guy. Collective amnesia pisses me off.

What the fuck ever. This conversation is over.

 

[Disir]

God forbid you have to tangle with woman's pov.