Women should dress modestly or expect to 'entice a rapist...'

[DigitalDrifter]

They have to know at some level. It's fascinating to observe, but you can't communicate with people who refuse to be honest.

I said this in post 333: "There is rape -- which, as I understand it, is essentially as it is portrayed by those here who are against what Hynde said -- and then there is the relatively long list of bad stuff that can happen when a guy gets too drunk and excited and horny -- some of which, by the way, could be construed as rape by some."

These people are choosing to remain locked in this binary argument: There is only one kind of rape, there is only one kind of rapist, rape only happens for one reason, there is only one environment in which an act can be interpreted as rape, rape only has one meaning every time. They leave no room for gray area or interpretation, which is precisely what would be needed in the real world if a young lady brought a rape charge. They are being absolutely absolutist. It's like trying to discuss taxes with a Tea Partier.

It amazes me, how similar the two ends are. I don't know how to deal with absolutists.

They have to know better, they're doing this on purpose, they're not being honest. Par for the course for the PC Police.
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No, what people are trying to explain to you is that it does not matter WHAT THE HECK you are wearing. You will STILL get raped if there is a rapist in the room who decides he wants to rape you. It could be your hair color, your perfume, that you remind him of someone, etc., etc., etc.

So, women should no longer wear sexy clothes because we should fear that this would cause us to be raped??? That's ridiculous.

Ok, there's a rapist in the room. You're wearing a very short skirt and sheer blouse that exposes a very sexy bra. You act flirty and are drinking.
There's another woman in the room with very conservative attire and is speaking and acting in a very conservative and modest fashion.

Both leave the room and go their separate ways.

Who is the rapist more likely to follow ?

A rapist would sometimes probably AVOID the loud-mouthed drunk girl who is making a scene. The quiet demure shy woman might be the bigger turn on for HIM. Rape is USUALLY a crime of opportunity. They really are NOT that choosy in most instances. They are seeking out a VICTIM.

The provocatively dressed woman will get more attention from someone seeking sexual gratification.

Yes, the normal men will be paying more attention to the sexy girl and maybe hope to get lucky. Rapists are NOT normal men. They are sick and twisted individuals.

Or some could be men who didn't think they were bad, got sexually aroused, and did things they originally never intended. One size never fits all.

 

[ChrisL]

Also, a lot of times a rapist would avoid a woman who shows any kind of self confidence. They want an EASY victim.

And again, we agree. Many men feel that a woman who would go out of their way to dress seductively are easy.
.

Yeah, STUPID men who don't know anything about women.

 

[Mac1958]

No, what people are trying to explain to you is that it does not matter WHAT THE HECK you are wearing. You will STILL get raped if there is a rapist in the room who decides he wants to rape you. It could be your hair color, your perfume, that you remind him of someone, etc., etc., etc.

So, women should no longer wear sexy clothes because we should fear that this would cause us to be raped??? That's ridiculous.

Ok, there's a rapist in the room. You're wearing a very short skirt and sheer blouse that exposes a very sexy bra. You act flirty and are drinking.
There's another woman in the room with very conservative attire and is speaking and acting in a very conservative and modest fashion.

Both leave the room and go their separate ways.

Who is the rapist more likely to follow ?

A rapist would sometimes probably AVOID the loud-mouthed drunk girl who is making a scene. The quiet demure shy woman might be the bigger turn on for HIM. Rape is USUALLY a crime of opportunity. They really are NOT that choosy in most instances. They are seeking out a VICTIM.

The provocatively dressed woman will get more attention from someone seeking sexual gratification.

Yes, the normal men will be paying more attention to the sexy girl and maybe hope to get lucky. Rapists are NOT normal men. They are sick and twisted individuals.

Or some could be men who didn't think they were bad, got sexually aroused, and did things they originally never intended. One size never fits all.

They will not admit this.
.

 

[ChrisL]

Also, a lot of times a rapist would avoid a woman who shows any kind of self confidence. They want an EASY victim.

And again, we agree. Many men feel that a woman who would go out of their way to dress seductively are easy.
.

Thinking a woman is "easy" and raping her are two completely different things. Your statements are beginning to get more and MORE ridiculous.

You're just not being honest.

Rape isn't black and white. The two people involved can have different opinions, and it happens all the time.

Admit it or not, this is (sadly) a gray area.
.

But you are the one INSISTING it has to do with clothing when we all KNOW it does not. Many, many, many women who were NOT dressed sexy have been raped. MANY.

 

[Mac1958]

Also, a lot of times a rapist would avoid a woman who shows any kind of self confidence. They want an EASY victim.

And again, we agree. Many men feel that a woman who would go out of their way to dress seductively are easy.
.

Yeah, STUPID men who don't know anything about women.

Sure, and they're out there. That's reality. That's my point.
.

 

[Mac1958]

Also, a lot of times a rapist would avoid a woman who shows any kind of self confidence. They want an EASY victim.

And again, we agree. Many men feel that a woman who would go out of their way to dress seductively are easy.
.

Thinking a woman is "easy" and raping her are two completely different things. Your statements are beginning to get more and MORE ridiculous.

You're just not being honest.

Rape isn't black and white. The two people involved can have different opinions, and it happens all the time.

Admit it or not, this is (sadly) a gray area.
.

But you are the one INSISTING it has to do with clothing when we all KNOW it does not. Many, many, many women who were NOT dressed sexy have been raped. MANY.

No, I'm not insisting anything. Back you go to the absolutism.

I'm saying that, even if it is to the slightest degree, chances are increased.

It's you folks who are doing the insisting.
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[Bonzi]

Also, a lot of times a rapist would avoid a woman who shows any kind of self confidence. They want an EASY victim.

And again, we agree. Many men feel that a woman who would go out of their way to dress seductively are easy.
.

Hubby says this all the time.
If someone dresses like that, they are looking for sex or at least is giving that message to men (whether the woman is or not, men think that... according to him....)

I think if you look really hot and dress in a sexual revealing way, and, are at a bar, and flirt with a guy etc. and things get a little carried away, date rape can occur. In this instance, I think it's not so much the clothes as the flirtation and teasing of the woman that may lead to date rape.

Other kinds of rape, based on anger, power or pain are different.... but can interplay into a date rape situation...

 

[Mac1958]

Also, a lot of times a rapist would avoid a woman who shows any kind of self confidence. They want an EASY victim.

And again, we agree. Many men feel that a woman who would go out of their way to dress seductively are easy.
.

Hubby says this all the time.
If someone dresses like that, they are looking for sex or at least is giving that message to men (whether the woman is or not, men think that... according to him....)

I think if you look really hot and dress in a sexual revealing way, and, are at a bar, and flirt with a guy etc. and things get a little carried away, date rate can occur. In this instance, I think it's not so much the clothes as the flirtation and teasing of the woman that may lead to date rate.

Other kinds of rape, based on anger, power or pain are different.... but can interplay into a date rape situation...

These folks are stuck on absolutism, they don't want to give an inch, they won't be honest.
.

 

[ChrisL]

Ok, there's a rapist in the room. You're wearing a very short skirt and sheer blouse that exposes a very sexy bra. You act flirty and are drinking.
There's another woman in the room with very conservative attire and is speaking and acting in a very conservative and modest fashion.

Both leave the room and go their separate ways.

Who is the rapist more likely to follow ?

A rapist would sometimes probably AVOID the loud-mouthed drunk girl who is making a scene. The quiet demure shy woman might be the bigger turn on for HIM. Rape is USUALLY a crime of opportunity. They really are NOT that choosy in most instances. They are seeking out a VICTIM.

The provocatively dressed woman will get more attention from someone seeking sexual gratification.

Yes, the normal men will be paying more attention to the sexy girl and maybe hope to get lucky. Rapists are NOT normal men. They are sick and twisted individuals.

Or some could be men who didn't think they were bad, got sexually aroused, and did things they originally never intended. One size never fits all.

They will not admit this.
.

That is the most stupid thing EVA! A person who is NOT a rapist would not want to rape any women, regardless of how they are dressed. They would want a willing participant and not to force themselves on an unwilling victim.

 

[DigitalDrifter]

Good Lord! It's not like you can see ANYTHING. I'm a single lady. There is nothing wrong with wanting to attract a little bit of attention from the opposite sex. That certainly doesn't mean a woman WANTS to be raped, silly. I can guarantee that most single women do the same.

See, you've admitted you did want to attract attention.
That's the whole point here.
No one wants to be raped, no one asks to, and a mans behavior is his own responsibility, but keep in mind how you look, how you speak, how you behave can be factors in drawing attention to yourself. Sometimes that attention may be of a desirous nature, and sometimes maybe not.

 

[ChrisL]

Also, a lot of times a rapist would avoid a woman who shows any kind of self confidence. They want an EASY victim.

And again, we agree. Many men feel that a woman who would go out of their way to dress seductively are easy.
.

Hubby says this all the time.
If someone dresses like that, they are looking for sex or at least is giving that message to men (whether the woman is or not, men think that... according to him....)

I think if you look really hot and dress in a sexual revealing way, and, are at a bar, and flirt with a guy etc. and things get a little carried away, date rape can occur. In this instance, I think it's not so much the clothes as the flirtation and teasing of the woman that may lead to date rape.

Other kinds of rape, based on anger, power or pain are different.... but can interplay into a date rape situation...

You flirt all the time. What message are you trying to give?

 

[Bonzi]

Good Lord! It's not like you can see ANYTHING. I'm a single lady. There is nothing wrong with wanting to attract a little bit of attention from the opposite sex. That certainly doesn't mean a woman WANTS to be raped, silly. I can guarantee that most single women do the same.

See, you've admitted you did want to attract attention.
That's the whole point here.
No one wants to be raped, no one asks to, and a mans behavior is his own responsibility, but keep in mind how you look, how you speak, how you behave can be factors in drawing attention to yourself. Sometimes that attention may be of a desirous nature, and sometimes maybe not.

Gotta be willing to take the bad with the good.
What should be and what is are 2 different things........

 

[Mac1958]

A rapist would sometimes probably AVOID the loud-mouthed drunk girl who is making a scene. The quiet demure shy woman might be the bigger turn on for HIM. Rape is USUALLY a crime of opportunity. They really are NOT that choosy in most instances. They are seeking out a VICTIM.

The provocatively dressed woman will get more attention from someone seeking sexual gratification.

Yes, the normal men will be paying more attention to the sexy girl and maybe hope to get lucky. Rapists are NOT normal men. They are sick and twisted individuals.

Or some could be men who didn't think they were bad, got sexually aroused, and did things they originally never intended. One size never fits all.

They will not admit this.
.

That is the most stupid thing EVA! A person who is NOT a rapist would not want to rape any women, regardless of how they are dressed. They would want a willing participant and not to force themselves on an unwilling victim.

You're stuck on thinking that there is only one kind of rape, one universal description of rape, one environment of rape. It either was rape or it wasn't, and everyone would agree.

I can't fix that.
.

 

[Bonzi]

Also, a lot of times a rapist would avoid a woman who shows any kind of self confidence. They want an EASY victim.

And again, we agree. Many men feel that a woman who would go out of their way to dress seductively are easy.
.

Hubby says this all the time.
If someone dresses like that, they are looking for sex or at least is giving that message to men (whether the woman is or not, men think that... according to him....)

I think if you look really hot and dress in a sexual revealing way, and, are at a bar, and flirt with a guy etc. and things get a little carried away, date rape can occur. In this instance, I think it's not so much the clothes as the flirtation and teasing of the woman that may lead to date rape.

Other kinds of rape, based on anger, power or pain are different.... but can interplay into a date rape situation...

You flirt all the time. What message are you trying to give?

Just sharing thoughts... no message... yes, I love to flirt!!!!

 

[ChrisL]

Good Lord! It's not like you can see ANYTHING. I'm a single lady. There is nothing wrong with wanting to attract a little bit of attention from the opposite sex. That certainly doesn't mean a woman WANTS to be raped, silly. I can guarantee that most single women do the same.

See, you've admitted you did want to attract attention.
That's the whole point here.
No one wants to be raped, no one asks to, and a mans behavior is his own responsibility, but keep in mind how you look, how you speak, how you behave can be factors in drawing attention to yourself. Sometimes that attention may be of a desirous nature, and sometimes maybe not.

Wanting to attract attention means I want to meet new people. It doesn't mean anything else. Of course we women have our little things we do to attract attention. Men are highly visual creatures.

 

[ChrisL]

Also, a lot of times a rapist would avoid a woman who shows any kind of self confidence. They want an EASY victim.

And again, we agree. Many men feel that a woman who would go out of their way to dress seductively are easy.
.

Hubby says this all the time.
If someone dresses like that, they are looking for sex or at least is giving that message to men (whether the woman is or not, men think that... according to him....)

I think if you look really hot and dress in a sexual revealing way, and, are at a bar, and flirt with a guy etc. and things get a little carried away, date rape can occur. In this instance, I think it's not so much the clothes as the flirtation and teasing of the woman that may lead to date rape.

Other kinds of rape, based on anger, power or pain are different.... but can interplay into a date rape situation...

You flirt all the time. What message are you trying to give?

Just sharing thoughts... no message... yes, I love to flirt!!!!

Well, some of these men here would say you were "asking for it." What do you think about that?

 

[Bonzi]

Also, a lot of times a rapist would avoid a woman who shows any kind of self confidence. They want an EASY victim.

And again, we agree. Many men feel that a woman who would go out of their way to dress seductively are easy.
.

Hubby says this all the time.
If someone dresses like that, they are looking for sex or at least is giving that message to men (whether the woman is or not, men think that... according to him....)

I think if you look really hot and dress in a sexual revealing way, and, are at a bar, and flirt with a guy etc. and things get a little carried away, date rape can occur. In this instance, I think it's not so much the clothes as the flirtation and teasing of the woman that may lead to date rape.

Other kinds of rape, based on anger, power or pain are different.... but can interplay into a date rape situation...

You flirt all the time. What message are you trying to give?

Just sharing thoughts... no message... yes, I love to flirt!!!!

Well, some of these men here would say you were "asking for it." What do you think about that?

I think that is not wise on their part

 

[Mac1958]

Well, some of these men here would say you were "asking for it." What do you think about that?

BINGO. You once again agree with me. There are a lot of guys like that. That is what I am concerned about, and it damn well happens.
.

 

[ChrisL]

The provocatively dressed woman will get more attention from someone seeking sexual gratification.

Yes, the normal men will be paying more attention to the sexy girl and maybe hope to get lucky. Rapists are NOT normal men. They are sick and twisted individuals.

Or some could be men who didn't think they were bad, got sexually aroused, and did things they originally never intended. One size never fits all.

They will not admit this.
.

That is the most stupid thing EVA! A person who is NOT a rapist would not want to rape any women, regardless of how they are dressed. They would want a willing participant and not to force themselves on an unwilling victim.

You're stuck on thinking that there is only one kind of rape, one universal description of rape, one environment of rape. It either was rape or it wasn't, and everyone would agree.

I can't fix that.
.

Nope, there can be many reasons, but clothing is usually pretty low on the list. Let's not forget that most rapists are KNOWN by their victims. Those are the MOST common rapes. Acquaintance rape.

 

[Mac1958]

Yes, the normal men will be paying more attention to the sexy girl and maybe hope to get lucky. Rapists are NOT normal men. They are sick and twisted individuals.

Or some could be men who didn't think they were bad, got sexually aroused, and did things they originally never intended. One size never fits all.

They will not admit this.
.

That is the most stupid thing EVA! A person who is NOT a rapist would not want to rape any women, regardless of how they are dressed. They would want a willing participant and not to force themselves on an unwilling victim.

You're stuck on thinking that there is only one kind of rape, one universal description of rape, one environment of rape. It either was rape or it wasn't, and everyone would agree.

I can't fix that.
.

Nope, there can be many reasons, but clothing is usually pretty low on the list. Let's not forget that most rapists are KNOWN by their victims. Those are the MOST common rapes. Acquaintance rape.

And again you help. It's low on the list, agreed!

But it's on the list.
.