- Sep 19, 2020
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Thanks very much for that post; I really appreciate it.And thank you for bringing such badly needed intelligence and thoughtfulness and rationality to the board. Most people on here think that this is a big fucking joke, and have no interest in learning anything that will bump up against their bigoted views. Rather they dumb it down to a mud slinging circle jerkThanks for a thoughtful reply that makes others think too.This is not about transgender rights. It is about the mental health of a 14 year old, an age at which HE is very aware of HIS gender identity. Feelings of gender dysphoria must be dealt with in a responsible way, or the next thing they they may be dealing with is suicideApparently, in Canada, the push for transgender rights is now superior to those of a parent to care for their own biological children. This is quite concerning....
Father jailed after referring to biological female child as his daughter
The judge's gag order includes:
"a) CD shall be restrained from: i. attempting to persuade AB to abandon treatment for gender dysphoria; ii. addressing AB by his birth name; and iii. referring to AB as a girl or with female pronouns whether to AB directly or to third parties;
"b) CD shall not directly, or indirectly through an agent or third party, publish or share information or documentation relating to AB’s sex, gender identity, sexual orientation, mental or physical health, medical status or therapies."
Father jailed after referring to biological female child as his daughter
The warrant was issued by a judge for the arrest of a father after calling his biological female child his “daughter,” and referring to her with the pronouns “she” and “her.” He was found to be in contempt of court.thepostmillennial.com
Just wow.
It's quite complicated.
Does a father have a right to interface in a non-physical manner with his own biological children in a manner which may upset them greatly?
Does a court have a right to tell a father what words he may or may not say to his own children?
Does a 14-yr-old's desires to act in a certain way over-ride a father's right to attempt to modify a minor's behavior he deems to be undesirable?
I know the answer here, probably. A parent has a right to raise their children they have custody of in the manner they choose as long as it is not considered harmful. In this case, the court has ruled that the father's conduct is harmful, even though the father probably has good intentions in his own mind. The court feels that "gender identity" is supported by science, and is so important that the minor's right to self-identify outweighs the father's right to raise his children as he sees appropriate, knowing that some children go through "phases" and often change significantly during puberty, when it is allowed to occur naturally.
When I was young, I hung out with mainly girls. I wasn't feminine; girls seemed to be smarter. I also wanted to be a stuntman. I turned out to be an engineer.
I remember when being a "tom boy" used to be a frequent thing among young girls. They were the most fun. Most of them seemed to outgrow it. I think it's probably called something different now.
You are right in saying that it is complicated but there are answers for those who seek them and are willing to learn. I come from a child welfare/protective services background . My first thought is that when it's a matter of the best interest of the child, vs. the rights of the parents, the decision should always be in favor of the child. However, it is not always clear what exactly is in the childs best interest.
However, in this case it is pretty clear to me. As you point out, the court feels that "gender identity" is supported by science. I agree and many mental health professionals do also. Regardless of the cause of gender dysphoria and whether or not it is biological, it is a feeling that is very real to a child (or adult) Failure to address it in a suportive and rational and responsible way is detrimental to the childs mental health and can result in self destuctive behavior and depression.
What do I mean by that.? I am certainly not suggesting that the child undergo any sort of irreversable gender reassignment. But he needs to have an opportunity to explore his feeings and gender identity ti see where it goes. He needs professional help, not to "cure him" but to help him to find his way. And he needs a supportive environment in his home as well. He needs to be allowed to be a boy, or as non binary, for as long as he needs to.
As such, what this father is doing (where is the mother?) amounts to emotional abuse and the court is right in telling the father what to do ( althogh jail is a bit harsh and I don't think that would happen in this country) Parental rights are not absolute and if the parent or parents refused to put the childs best interest first, foster care might be an option.
And yes, I can relate to you childhood experiences, which was a long time ago for me. It was a time when being trans was unheard of and being gay was being sick freak and no one would admit to it. Trans and gay are, of course not new. They are just more visable because more, and more people feel safe in comming out and being authentic with themselves and others, and that is a good thing for our collective mental health. At the same time, there are morons and bigots, right here on this board, who claim that there is a liberal conspiracy to turn kids gay and trans.m That is as stupid as stupid gets
Anyway thank you again for your input and for inspiring me to write this
>My first thought is that when it's a matter of the best interest of the child, vs. the rights of the parents, the decision should always be in favor of the child. However, it is not always clear what exactly is in the childs best interest.
Yeah, it's complicated. I tend to think the court should stay out of controversial things like a man wanting to raise his female minor child as his daughter. I really think it is an over-reach of government authority to get involved in such things, and the science does say her DNA is female, beyond a doubt. It's quite strange to me that a court would rule he cannot treat her as a daughter.
I suppose I would be more averse to the father proactively participating. It's not like I am anti-LGBT or anything; I just think kids sometimes get crazy ideas and try to stand out from the crowd and get attention, and they often change dramatically throughout puberty. I won't judge any of the parties involved here.
I can respect other opinions, though. We are all different, and you can't learn anything at all from someone who completely agrees with you. I try to get along with everyone here, despite being quite Conservative myself (that means freedom for all, equality of opportunity, and limited gov't, maybe not what you think).
I can understand the suggestion that the father is being emotionally abusive, but it's quite arguable.
>long time ago for me. It was a time when being trans was unheard of and being gay was being sick freak and no one would admit to it.
When I was in high school, we had some people I would consider to be openly gay. They were very nice people, and very popular. I liked them, and sometimes wonder how they are doing these days.
