Hello everyone. I do believe I have been missed. I hope all is well and that I haven't missed anything? My thoughts are with those are are suffering, as they have always been.
As for me, I am battling through. I am still waiting to hear back from the counselors, it must be a long waiting list, or they have forgotten about me. I admit now that I am frightened of speaking about such things again as no one wants to remember being abused, but if it may help me, then I guess I have to try it.
Currently I am at home nursing a knee injury. I would be traveling to a special seminar tomorrow, run by a 5th Dan black belt, but am unable to go due to the injury. It sucks, but these things happen.
The best thing that has happened in the past few weeks? It happened today. Just as I was getting so frustrated, too. See, there is this guy who comes in a couple times a week with a group of kids. They attend the special school and are 'troubled'. They don't speak to me, and their carer often brings them in to the store for some ice cream or frozen drinks.
Anyway, I always serve them and on Monday he told me of a project he was wanting to do with the kids, to keep them occupied as they were becoming a bit of a handful. He showed me on his phone what he planned on doing - making 'eyes', kind of like this:
To do this, he needed some of our domed lids, which fit over the large cups for our frozen drinks. I gave him about ten on Monday, and yesterday he came in to say hello, and I asked how the project was going, and he said it was still ongoing, and could he please have some more lids. I would have given him a bigger handful but the manager on duty can be a right bitch, and such was her mood yesterday. She only allowed me to hand over another ten lids, which I did.
The guy asked if I was working today and I said I was, and told him what time I was working.
This morning, he came in with a couple of the kids, and they happily placed their plastic eyeballs in front of me. To be honest, they looked nothing like the photo above, or the video he showed me on his phone, but these kids had disabilities, remember. They had worked for three days on these plastic lids, and I thought they looked great. I congratulated the kids on a great job, and thanked them for coming in especially for me to show me their hard work, and the kids beamed from ear to ear - they were so proud!
It made my whole week, and lifted me a little out of the depression that has been plaguing me for weeks.
Oh Noomi, soooooo happy you stopped by to catch us up on what is going on with you. I was just about to add you to our MIA list. You have become such an important part of the Coffee Shop family, we miss you when you disappear for awhile.
Any luck with any of those jobs you applied for? Sounds like you are able to help some special people with the one you have.
Just in case you get lost in bureaucratic red tape or something, do keep inquiring about when you will see the counselor--squeaky wheel and all that.
Something else you might do in the meantime is see if there is a chapter of Adult Survivors of Child Abuse (ASCA) near you--it is an international organization that provides free self-help groups. And HAVOCA (just enter it into your browser) may also have some resources that would be helpful. Or there may be other such self-help groups in your area. Don't be shy about going--all such support groups won't push you to share any more than you are comfortable sharing and if you tell them you're just there to listen, you can do that too.
And again, yes, you were a missed person.
Thanks Foxy. I am checking out the HAVOCA page and decided to join their forums to talk with people who have suffered as I have. It may help in the meantime.
Thanks y'all for thinking of me, and your thoughts and prayers. Much appreciated. You are all such great friends.
Big news right now, though, heard last night - come Xmas time, I'm going to be an auntie! My sister is around 4 weeks pregnant, just waiting on bloods to confirm. She did about a dozen home pregnancy tests, all positive, so its almost certain that she'll be a mum by the end of the year.